Dusty Donovan has seen better days. If you tuned in this week and thought you saw Grizzly Adams or Robinson Crusoe on the beach, you would be wrong. It was just Dusty Donovan, after months in captivity in a cage, where he hadn't seen the light of day, let alone a razor or haircut.

I know what you're thinking: Dusty died and they did an autopsy, so how is it possible he's alive? Well, Scoopers, this is Oakdale, where not even a toe tag means it's the end of the road. Apparently, Dusty faked his death, paying someone to file an autopsy report, just so he could convince Craig he was dead. It's a leap, but go ahead and make it, because I think the payoff is going to be worth it. Grayson McCouch is a good actor, and if the writers give him something to do other than stomp around espousing how evil Craig is, his return could be fascinating.

The history with this character is rich. I recall when he first returned to Oakdale that he and Meg became bed buddies, before he fell for Jennifer, then Emily. I always thought Meg and Dusty had off-the-charts chemistry, so perhaps the writers are going to revisit it. (For Paul's sake, I hope so. The man is one rant away from a straight jacket.) Dusty also has plenty of history with Lily that could be explored. Now, if we could just get John Dixon back on the scene, so that Dusty had some family in town, all would be perfect. Well, as soon as he gets a haircut and a shave, that is.

Meanwhile:
--Alison Stewart Snyder makes me want to scream. Feel free to join me. First, she married a man she isn't in love with, then, she convinced herself that having a baby with him would make her forget about the man she does love. I truly thought Ali had matured, but clearly, she's been following in the footsteps of wishy-washy Emily.

--I couldn't help but chuckle at Emily this week when she said that kids are such a burden and tie you down. Um, when exactly did Daniel ever tie Emily down? Tom raised Daniel, when he wasn't away at boarding school. Emily, you're not exactly mom of the year!

--Paul Ryan is so much more interesting when he has his psychic visions. I'd like to see this story expanded. Paul could help the cop shop from time to time when they need it, and considering the debacle that occurred with Emma's farm project and all the money she's losing, Paul should be able to psychically see the lotto numbers and give them to Emma to help her recoup her losses. It's the least he could do. Emma could bake a lot of pies with all that dough. (Sorry, I couldn't resist.)

--Katie and Brad are in trouble. It's never a good sign when the wife heads out of town to get drunk with an ex-husband. I felt Katie's pain, as she cried over her drink with Mike that she's a failure at relationships. Frankly, I don't want to see this serial monogamist get another divorce. Katie has been down the aisle too many times, and I like her with Brad. Perhaps, Katie will realize that in the past she hasn't always been a perfect spouse either and forgive Brad for his latest lapse in judgment. It's not like she hasn't made a few of her own. (Hello, Oakdale Confidential!)

--When Emma mentioned a fundraiser to save the farm, I was hoping it would turn into a talent show. As I said before, there is an embarrassment of riches of gifted vocalists and entertainers in the cast, and it would be fun to see them doing a bit or two to help save the farm. It would be like Oakdale's very own Farm Aid. Quick, someone call Willie Nelson.

--Lily and Holden are back together. Sorry Carly. Sorry Mike. It's not like we didn't see this coming, right? Lily and Holden are like a moth and a flame. They always end up back together. The timing is interesting, however, as Lily's first love, Dusty, was just found alive this week. Holden, I wouldn't throw away Carly's number just yet.

--As sad as I was to see Lily tell Carly that they could never be friends again, I kind of understand it. Who wants a friend that you can't trust not to sleep with your husband? At the same time, though, Lily forgave Holden, so doesn't Carly deserve the same courtesy? According to Lily, no. She has kids with Holden and that's reason enough for her to forgive him. But, Carly doesn't get the same treatment. Unfair? Yes. But, realistically, I can't say I blame her.

--Jack Snyder, please get off your high horse! Seriously, it must be difficult always looking down on everyone from up there. This week when he threw Brad's $20,000 check back in his face in disgust, I wanted to smack him. First, no one made Jack take that evidence and give it to Janet. That was all him. He started this mess. So for him to be so angry with Brad, and not himself, is simply hypocritical. Jack, you are human and you made a mistake and so did Brad. Cut your brother some slack, the same slack you'd give your kids or your ex wife.

--Paul Ryan, you need to respect your mama. I couldn't believe how venomous he was to her this week, screaming at her to leave him alone. Um, Paul, the woman pretty much bankrupted herself to cough up cash to save your butt. She deserves your respect, not your high-shrilled screams. Paul's hysteria this week proved that James is indeed driving him mad. Well played, Stenbeck.

--If you added Meg to the ATWT drinking game to take a sip every time she's a "victim" or suffering a health problem, then you're probably still hung over. She grabbed her tummy so many times in the last few days from cramping, that it made me want to drink. What has happened to Meg Snyder? Didn't she come to town a tough gal, raised on a farm? This always-ailing and in-peril woman is a sap. She's more of a Melanie Hamilton than a Scarlett O'Hara. I hope Dusty has some smelling salts on that island.

--Call me crazy, but I'm enjoying the Katie/Janet friendship. Yes, I know they didn't start out as friends, but Katie could use a gal pal. It's not like she ever gets together with her sister.

--Once again, Mike Kasnoff is off to pursue his construction dreams, somewhere other than Oakdale. I was giggling when he said he didn't know where he'd go next. I have visions of Mike driving around in a dump truck from city to city looking for work. He needs a t-shirt: Have toolbelt, will work!

--Who was the hot doctor taking care of Paul at the hospital? Bonnie should forget Derek and get herself admitted to the ER (See Meg for tips on how to do that.) This hot doc isn't a criminal, like Bonnie's current man of interest.

--Add this to the ATWT drinking game. Take a gulp every time Paul threatens to kill James. At this point, Paul's threats mean nothing. Especially when we all know even if Paul does "kill" James, he won't be dead. (Remember the toe tag rule I mentioned at the beginning of this column?)

--Carly seems lonely and frustrated. She needs to throw herself into her work, I think. Her frustration seems to be mounting. She made herself a sandwich this week, only to abruptly toss it in the trash. What did that sandwich ever do to her? Seriously, she needs to get out of that house.

Best Lines of the Week:
(Distressed about his wife's kidnapping, Paul lashes out at the police station causing a disturbance.)
Jack: "I think it's time you left."
Paul: "Why, donut time?"

(Henry, Vienna and Bonnie lie to the police to cover for Derek's involvement in their kidnappings.)
Dallas: "These are your official statements?"
Bonnie: "Do you have a problem with that?"
Dallas: "No. I'm a big fan of fiction."

(Jack tells a ranting Paul that he needs to try to calm down about Meg's kidnapping.)
Paul: "My mom gave me some medication."
Jack: "Are you taking it?"
Paul: "Does it look like I'm taking it? It's not going to solve my problem."
Jack: "It'll solve one of mine."

Reader Spotlight:
(From Two Scoops reader M. Davis.)
I guess I'm the only one who loves Paul Ryan. I have seen him play so many emotions, the bad guy on One Life to Live that you loved anyway, to a guy who really wants to do right, but the writers can never just quite get him there. The thing is, he can act and plays the part the way they write it. It's the only interesting plot on right now. It has Henry and Barabra, and the police all involved. I turn the channel when Luke and his buddy are on, because they are boring to me, also. I do like the new Mike and Lily together and will be sad to see Mike go. And I'll always root for Carly and Jack; they just have too much chemistry to not be together. As for Holden, I'd still like to see him with Emily.

(From Two Scoops reader Lewis.)
I agree that Luke and Noah are kind of boring right now, but hopefully the writers (listen up, people!) will get back on track and realize what a truly (potentially) groundbreaking pair these two have been and can continue to be in the future. Whether it's a love triangle, illness or just a further exploration of their feelings for each other, let's hope these two get some decent story soon. I have gone from a regular, die-hard fan of the show to a semi-regular viewer. I just haven't found too many of the storylines compelling as of late. However, if Luke and Noah would get revved up once again, and Carly and Jack start (slowly!) moving back together, I'd be back in a heartbeat. Oh, and the return of James Stenbeck (one of the greatest villains ever!) and Dusty will help, I'm sure. Then again, I remember the botched return of Rosanna. Well, here's hoping . . .

That's all for now Scoopers! See ya next time.
Jennifer Biller