Lucy Montgomery, welcome home! I love, love, love the new Lucy. She's only been in town a few days, and I'm already smitten. Spencer Grammer has acting chops, and I can't wait to see what happens when Dusty remembers why he fell for Ms. Lucy. Um, note to Jennifer: I wouldn't pick out that wedding gown just yet. Sure, Dusty was positively awful to Lucy, but I think it's just a matter of time before he remembers why he fell for her in the first place. That said, I'm not so sure I wouldn't like to see Lucy go in another direction entirely. I find it a little weird that Dusty is going to be "daddy" to Lucy's brother and also that Dusty was her Aunt Lily's first love. Maybe she just needs to move on.

May I suggest Henry? He needs someone to hook up with who isn't crazy, or blonde, for that matter. Plus, it would send Lucinda over the edge. And considering that Henry was married to Katie once, Lucy could call him "Uncle Henry" and mean it. Kidding, folks.

Kudos to the writers for having the rest of Oakdale question Lucy's speedy transition from college freshman to doctor. The fact that we're supposed to buy this "accelerated program" explanation is a little tough to swallow, and I'm glad it isn't being ignored on screen. As for Lucy's medical skills, I'm skeptical. Oakdale citizens beware: if admitted to Memorial, ask for a more seasoned professional. Paging Dr. Bob.

Meanwhile:
--They sure have been throwing around the "C" word a lot since Lucy returned. Yes, I'm talking about Craig. (Insert your cheer, moan or groan here.) Rumors are rampant that Craig soon may be trading in his prison-orange jump suit for his Armani. However, sources say it's not happening. Dare I hope, Scoopers? I'm trying not to get my hopes up. But, seriously, Craig and Simon back in Oakdale would make ATWT must-see-TV again for me.

--Et tu Lucy? Yes, Craig was horrible to Lucy during that whole kidnapping debacle, but the way she was dissing her daddy this week gave me pause. I thought Lucy and Craig made up before she went away to college? Did I miss something? Perhaps she finally had enough after the baby switch came was revealed. That would explain her "no contact" comment. But wouldn't you like to see those beats played on screen? Having Lucy back in town without a parent, friend or sibling to confide in is a little strange. I guess Aunt Lily and grandma Lucinda are going to be her sounding boards. But, she needs her dad. Hey, do you think there's an accelerated program for incarceration? If not, I have two words for Craig: prison break.

--The Kasnoffs are headed for trouble. Katie wacked Nick, thinking she was saving Mike, who blames himself, and now his wife, for Nick's death. Whew. Couples therapy anyone? Poor Katie. She can't seem to pick a husband who doesn't have baggage.

--Simon countdown. Only five days, as of this writing, until Simon hits Oakdale. Is it wrong to hope he has to take a room at Burt's Garage, just so I can her him say "ga-rage" in that charming Aussie accent?

--Will Munson, you are so on my list. Getting drunk and hooking up with the new town bad girl is no way to start a marriage. Maybe Will is going to be the town's next bad boy. That might be interesting, actually. He's had good role models in bad behavior i.e. Paul, Barbara, etc. And I can only imagine the scenes where Barbara and Gwen bond/bicker trying to pull Will back from the dark side.

--I've seen a lot of sad scenes in daytime, but Will's graduation non-party was one of the saddest. After being humiliated in front of his classmates, friends and family for cheating, he didn't get to graduate. OK, he didn't deserve to, but when he returned home and found all those presents, the good-luck notes, it hit a chord. This kid has screwed up so many times in his life, and I thought maybe he'd finally get some happiness. But, the realization that he'd once again screwed up was heart wrenching. Frankly, I was ready to reach for a "Hick's Beer" myself.

--I'm sure you probably heard my gagging reflex, wherever you are, when Jade made coffee this week with warm tap water straight from the faucet and a spoon of instant coffee. Ewww. And I thought I was bad in the kitchen.

--Did Holden get highlights? Or has he just been spending a lot of time outside in the sun with the horses?

--Is anyone else tired of Paul's games? He plays a new one every week. Yawn. I miss sincere Paul, when he actually meant it.

--Good for Craig trying to block the adoption. Bio dad has rights. That zippy trial that sent him to the pokey was beyond unfair, if I recall. So, maybe Craig will get a fair trial for a custody battle? Sure, he has no chance of winning, but it would be nice to see Cass again, no?

--Jade is growing on me as the bad girl. She was smart enough to take Will's keys, at least, and not let him drive drunk. Also, Jessica and Jade look so much alike, is it possible they're related? Some eagle-eyed Two Scoopers think they may be mother/daughter.

--The graduation scenes were fantastic, even though that was the smallest class of graduates I've ever seen. That's how you do a graduation. Bravo. Drama, family, suspense, it was all there. I loved that Margo was embarrassing Casey by trying to take photos, despite that she didn't know how to use the digital camera. "I can't even see the buttons," she deadpanned. Hilarious, and realistic of many parents. Gwen's song was beautiful and appropriate for the grads. My only issues were that Paul and Hal were no-shows for Will. Is it any wonder the kid is screwed up?

--Damian and Luke's scenes were great this week. And any scenario that drives Holden to pummel someone is a good one. I'm betting that Holden and Damian will be butting heads in the future, too, as Luke's homosexuality continues to affect his entire family.

--Now I remember why Jen was never my favorite character. Her behavior toward Lucy was just plain rude this week. Suddenly, I remember the way she treated Bryant when she hooked up with his cousin, and then the way she blamed Craig for their one-night stand.

--Sage must have gone to the "accelerated program" for toddlers. She suddenly aged a couple years, no?

Best Line of the Week:
(Emily, who is in the mental ward, foils Paul's scam that he's pretending to be fighting with his new girlfriend Meg.)
Emily: "I may be a little crazy, but I'm sure as Hell not stupid."

That's all for now Scoopers! See ya next time.
Jennifer Biller