Anti-climactic climax: the Tridge Mafia's takedown of Brooke Logan Forrester

On B&B, the Tridge Mafia is stacked with devious criminals, literally -- but six weeks into their war with Brooke, Brooke hasn't broken a sweat or even fiended for another drink. Stephanie is rolling over in her grave, knowing it's taking so long to reunite Tridge. Get the two scoops on why the Tridge Mafia is shooting blanks when it comes to besting Brooke and why Ridge will be real "extra" if he can't forgive Brooke after his own drunken mistakes.

Welcome back, Scoopers. Tip your bottles and pour out a little liquor for the last bit of hope you had at getting a decent, dramatic storyline out of either of the two front-burner plots on tap. Gone is the hope that we'd get a juicy Sheila versus Brooke saga or a Steffy on Brooke catfight. They should have at least let Brooke snatch the wig off Taylor's head.

Instead, all we got was a cryptic bitch session from Steffy that bored Brooke so badly she threw Steffy out of the house. Sheila is laughing in mirrors and still grumbling about Brooke calling her names, and the best Thomas can do these days is make fun of Brooke's voice. It ain't your Grandma's Tridge Mafia, that's for sure, and Steffy, Taylor, and Thomas all seem a bit lost in the Bridge takedown game without Stephanie leading the pack.

Even the mafia's evidence is wack. Are they really gambling everything on a kiss? I mean, come on. Quinn used Carter as a human dildo, and Eric still took her back. They might as well drop this "sleepover" bit while they're at it, too, because Brooke never once lost Ridge permanently over a sex lie manufactured by the Tridge Mafia.

Without Stephanie, the Tridge Mafia is washed up. Stephanie presided over their scam to hack Ridge's texts. Stephanie put Thomas up to making Brooke think she slept with him, and Stephanie faked the heart attack that actually formed the last Tridge marriage. Now the Tridge Mafia depends on Sheila's prank and a prayer that Ridge will believe Brooke had sex with Deacon. Maybe they'll get more creative as the plot drags on, but so far, the evidence is kind of petty, and it's being delivered by gangsters who've done the exact same things -- if not worse. Does Hector on New Year's Eve ring a bell? Who drugged Liam for sex with his sister again?

My last hope is that Sheila is exposed for switching champagne bottle labels on Brooke, but unless Sheila's mirror is a tattletale, how will Brooke ever know the real reason she drank? It's four-on-one against Brooke, but the Tridge Mafia is shooting blanks at Brooke, who is the only one with the power to take herself down.

This week, Steffy told Taylor that she doesn't lie, and Thomas and his sister can't imagine how Brooke can be better than Taylor. In fact, Thomas lauded his mother's altruism and asked when Brooke had ever helped anyone. I'd like to answer that question.

First off, Brooke helped Ridge by raising the youngins in the Tridge Mafia when Taylor was presumed dead. Next, Brooke helped Taylor stay out of prison by not telling the authorities that Taylor attempted to murder Bill Spencer. Brooke helped Caroline after she was raped, and Brooke was there for Stephanie when Stephanie was dying of cancer.

Brooke also helped Thomas a lot. She gave him a place to recuperate after his brain surgery. She mentored him and helped him create Taboo. She also helped out the poor when she gave away her fortune after Thomas accused her of having sex with him on Berry Island.

Meanwhile, Taylor helped herself to some Hector Ramirez on a lonely New Year's Eve of her own, and this is where the hypocrisy Ridge was talking about when he last divorced Taylor rears its ugly head again. It kind of takes the teeth out of Taylor's "drive-by" at Brooke's house Friday when she told Brooke that she knew what Brooke had done with Deacon. Yeah, and Brooke knows what Taylor did with Hector. In fact, Taylor begged Brooke to keep it quiet.

I'd say it amazes me that Taylor thinks she should have been the one to tell Ridge about Brooke's mistakes after Taylor begged Brooke not to tell about hers with Hector and with Nick, but it doesn't. Taylor has always looked down on others, lording their mistakes over them while hers pile up bigger than a stack of donkey doo behind her. It's exactly what Ridge told her that her problem was when he walked out on her in 2006, never to remarry her again so far.

Taylor's kids inherited her superiority complex. A soap buddy of mine said the other day that when it comes to the moral high ground, Thomas is standing in a ditch. Does he really want to talk about Brooke's lies and excuses after the sniveling and crying he did, trying to explain to his father why he ran Emma off the road? Or when he cried to his entire wedding party because he got caught trying to fake marry Zoe for Hope's affections? How about when he offered to trade custody of his child for sex with Hope or faking letters to convince Hope to mother his son?

And then there's Two-Paternity-Test-Slinging Steffy, who is disgusted by Brooke's so-called scandals after she herself screwed two guys within a 36-hour period -- twice! Steffy is outraged that Brooke got caught kissing Bill, but Steffy is the one who let Bill put his pin in her cushion when she was married to his son. Steffy is also the one who just slept with Hope's husband and didn't want to tell a single soul about it. Imagine that.

I'm with Hope. I didn't want to start this stupid war back up, either, but the hypocrisy knows no bounds with the Tridge Mafia, who insists that Brooke can't avoid the consequences of her actions. Well, if Ridge can get Thomas out of consequences, and if Steffy and Taylor can get away with shooting people, then I think Brooke has a fighting chance of skating, too.

Now Dr. Know-Nothing just had to go to Brooke's house to put her two cents in. With inflation kicking in, it's as worthless as the breath Taylor will expend to give it. I hope that someday soon, Brooke is allowed to go off and blast the Tridge Mafia straight into reality about themselves and their lying, cheating, murderous mother.

Taylor shed tears as she broke it to Ridge about what Brooke and Deacon did. The whole time, I was thinking, "Why are you crying, chick? Get to the point!" And so was Ridge. It was the first time I applauded him for rudely snapping at somebody. It didn't help my patience any that Steffy was playing verbal-charades catfight with Brooke at the same time it was going down. Brooke and Ridge both decided that they didn't have time for it. It was deeply satisfying when Brooke threw Steffy out, reminding her that these types of things only make Bridge stronger.

It's true. Scandals are like aphrodisiacs to Bridge. Mis-identity sex, grief sex, kisses with daughters and sisters, and mothers-in-law... all roll right off Brooke and Ridge's backs. The writers have to have something up their sleeves because this kiss is only a drop in the Bridge bucket. Just recently, for example, Brooke forgave Ridge for not only kissing Shauna but also for running off and marrying and attempting to remarry her because Ridge hated that Brooke feels about Bill what Ridge feels about Taylor.

And speaking of what Ridge "feels" about Taylor, those hugs between them aren't meaningless. I saw what a hug from the right woman did to Eric. Unless the Tridge Mafia is wrong about Tridge, Ridge probably feels something in his lower hemisphere whenever he hugs Taylor. Something has her grinning like a schoolgirl about to faint whenever she sees him, right?

The drunken kiss and "spending the night together" are two nothing burgers, hold the fries with a side of water without the lemon. Taylor and Steffy want to make it sound like something salacious happened, but even Ridge had the sensibility to realize there were other alternatives for Deacon staying the night than sex. At least so far, Ridge has acted that way.

To make it so bad, Brooke was drunk, and the pill-popping, alcoholic Tridge Mafia has no sympathy. Steffy claimed it was because Brooke knew Ridge wanted her to stay away from Deacon. Didn't Finn tell Steffy to ease up on Liam time before she told Liam, "Pour me one, too," and then poured herself all over Liam later that night? Didn't the law say not to whip knives out on people when the high-as-a-kite Steffy did it, anyway? Doesn't Taylor remember being so drunk that she slept with men she didn't even know? Things happen, and yeah, you really can blame it on the alcohol, as Taylor and Steffy have done themselves at times.

Ridge conveyed that he is hurt, but Brooke is his Logan. So, what's at stake here? Do we have the same kind of plot we had when everyone kept telling Eric to leave the adulterous Quinn, but they eventually shut up and let the couple be? Or is another shoe about to drop in this story? I hold out hope that Deacon will walk in on Sheila muttering to herself about Brooke and the labels, or maybe he'll find footage of her at Il Giardino, switching bottles. In the meantime, I have a premonition that Deacon is about to make it worse for Brooke, not better.

On Valentines' Day, the most loving day of the year, Deacon and Ridge will show the depth of their affection by rearranging each other's faces. Soap Central sat down with Sean Kanan (Deacon Sharpe) who teases that his scenes with Thorsten Kaye (Ridge Forrester) are something you don't see on Daytime every day. In the interview, Kanan offers insight into what makes Deacon tick and Deacon's feelings for Brooke. Additionally, Kanan reminds us that Ridge and Deacon have sparred before.

Of the impending brawl, Kanan chuckles, "I'll tell you, man, if I was Ridge, I would rip Deacon's head off -- or at least try! It's just funny when Thorsten is delivering his lines, I have to discipline myself to listen to the lines as the character instead of Sean going, 'Oh, my God, I totally get why this guy doesn't want Deacon around!' It's easy for me to align with Ridge's point of view."

Since Deacon is a martial artist, the only thing I can see from Ridge's point of view is the bottom of Deacon's foot before it connects with Ridge's neck. Who believes Ridge can honestly win a fight with Deacon? The only ways Ridge can win are if the mop and broom jump in to triple-team Ridge, if Deacon lets Ridge win for Brooke's sake, or if someone interrupts while Deacon is letting Ridge win for Brooke's sake.

Additional spoilers indicate that Ridge is grateful for Taylor's support. I wonder if "grateful" plus some snug hugs are all Taylor will get out of him. At this point, even if Ridge does hook up with Taylor, it's painfully obvious that Brooke is the love of his life, and Taylor is just a rebound.

Spoilers also indicate that Ridge reaches his breaking point. I suspect that's due to Brooke rushing in and protecting Deacon from Ridge's wrath. Ridge is nothing if not consistent, and nothing burns his buns like Brooke expressing the slightest bit of emotion or empathy for an ex. Ridge won't be able to take it that Brooke doesn't want him to pulverize her baby daddy, and there starts the drift toward Taylor that the Tridge Mafia has been scheming for.

The Tridge Mafia will help it along by complicating communication between Brooke and Ridge. Taylor will confront Brooke about supposedly sleeping with Deacon -- because that's what "world-renowned" psychiatrists do, pile more lies and accusations onto an alcoholic's plate the moment the alcoholic falls off the wagon. Ridge contemplates a future with and without Brooke -- for like the 20th time in the last 35 years.

It would be nice, for once, if Brooke was the one contemplating whether to be with Ridge's sorry behind. I have one word for Ridge: Shauna. He owes it to Brooke to let this all go because that's what she did about his shenanigans with Shauna.

That's it. That's all the scoops. Please post your views about the week and the Tridge Mafia in the comments section below. Have a bold and beautiful V-Day, baby!Chanel

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