The heat is on

Victor called the heat on Sharon, who was promptly escorted to a cell after she violated bail to appear at The Underground's grand reopening. Lauren wanted to make heat with Michael who worked hard at freezing her out. Passion heated up between Devon and Hilary as it ebbed between Avery and Dylan. This and more as Two Scoops' Boone tells all about her friends in Genoa City.

You've really got to hand it to Sharon. Her "I'm too dumb to have done it" defense was one that both Christine and Paul could understand, and just in time, too, or Sharon might have wound up sharing a cell and discussing designer duds with Michael's hooker friend, Felicity, instead of smooching it up with Dylan after Sharon got a "Get out of jail free" card from Christine.

Now that Sharon is free, Victor is not going to be a happy camper after he gleefully got Sharon arrested at the Underground, and neither is the person who framed Sharon. I have to admit it was a pretty good plan, but once Sharon pointed out that she was not clever enough to get into the police computers or plot such an elaborate scheme, it was as though a collective sigh of relief went up as everyone in Genoa City hit their forehead with the heel of their hand and said, "Duh! Of course it wasn't Sharon, she's not smart enough to be this clever. What were we thinking? Sharon must have been set up." And just like that, Sharon went from being a cold-blooded killer to an innocent lamb.

I don't know about the rest of you but I'm getting tired of this story, and I have to wonder if an ending has actually been written or if the writers are making it up as they go along. Framing Sharon was elaborate and took some planning. We still don't know what Fen had to do with the murders, but I can't believe that Fen is cold-blooded enough to kill both Austin and Courtney. It's still possible that Austin is alive and will turn out to be Courtney's murderer. That would be a tidy ending. Summer could divorce Austin and move on, and, like all respectable soap divas, Summer can be married at least five times before she turns 30!

Another possibility for the murderer is Detective Harding, who was always disrespectful to Courtney and didn't like Austin either. It would not be unusual for him to be in the station -- though I did not think Harding had computer skills -- but how would Harding know enough about Sharon to frame her, and why would he do that to her? Was it merely a bizarre coincidence because Sharon was driving around in the woods with Faith instead of finding a hotel during the storm? All of those explanations seem very far-fetched to me. I sure hope Y&R's scribes come up with a more plausible explanation than I have! If not, then they are definitely getting the "Boo, Hiss" award from me. So pick up the pace already and catch the killer. (Oh, and who is this computer expert "Ed" that both Kevin and Paul mentioned? I thought the department hired Kevin because they didn't have an expert and needed one.)

I'd like to interject a little rant about prostitutes, a.k.a. hookers, a.k.a. ladies of the evening, etc. It seems to me that TV shows and movies like Pretty Woman glamorize prostitution and make it seem a whole lot less sordid and depressing than it is. I have a really hard time believing that Michael could so quickly and easily find such a high-class call girl, and not only that, he found one with a heart of gold, and apparently a PhD in psychology. Personally, I think both Michael -- and the show -- would have been better served if Michael had chosen to consult a licensed therapist -- even a sex therapist -- than to turn to a trollop, who trades her body to strangers for money. There is too much human trafficking and too many young girls and boys forced into the sex trade for me to be okay with a sympathetic portrayal of prostitution. There are a whole lot more drug-addicted, STD-infected, sad, insecure girls standing on street corners in the trade than there are women like Felicity.

I'm glad that Lily decided to keep such goings-on out of her hotel. I really admired how Lily could call the police and have Felicity arrested outside the hotel then have Michael arrested in his room without a shred of evidence, except what Lily said she overheard Felicity say to Michael about calling her service. Felicity could have been talking about steno services as far as I could tell. Michael, obviously, is trying to do something so heinous that it will push Lauren away, and it seems to be working. I expect Lauren and Cane to be an item soon-- even if she is old enough to be his mother -- just as it's looking more and more like Michael will be pushing up daisies -- or residing in an urn next to Katherine -- very soon.

My hero has feet of clay! In the past, I've defended Victor, but there is no defense that I can think of that justifies the steps that Victor has taken to steal Jabot from the Abbotts and to steal Jack's life from him. Victor is one big greedy-gut, and I really don't see how he can look at himself in the mirror. Victor is morally reprehensible. Surely when he shaves, he wants to slit his own throat, unless he can't see his own reflection because Victor is a vampire -- just sayin'.

I can understand why Victor would keep going after Jack, but I don't understand why he would want to hurt Abby and Ashley, whom Victor claims to love. Stealing their inheritance and family business seems a strange way of saying "I love you." It would be one thing if Victor beat Jack fair and square, it's quite another, at least in my book, to get something from someone by being a devious, underhanded fraud, which is what Victor is when he's wearing his good guy hat. Victor's karma is so bad from this scheme that our solar system can die and be reborn a thousand times before Victor's karmic debt is paid.

Poor Jack, what a pickle he's in, and Yack, too. Both of them would rather be any place than where they are. Jack would certainly like to be someplace other than at Kelly's mercy. For a moment, Jack was almost free, and inexplicably, instead of calling Phyllis, he first phoned home -- no one answered and no machine -- and then Jack called Kyle where -- no surprise here -- Jack's impersonator just happened to intercept the call. Jack did manage to get the local police to come to his location, but once there, they cheerfully helped "Dr. Kelly" secure her "patient," Jack, in a straitjacket.

After the police left, Jack's predicament seemed even more precarious, especially after Kelly left him alone, without food or water, to reflect on his situation. If Jack has any sense, he will do whatever it takes to get Kelly to release all his bonds before he tries to overwhelm her again. It's obvious that Victor has everyone on the island paid off, so be clever, Jackie boy, if you want out of this one.

Yack is not in a good way either. When last he opened his eyes, Yack did not seem to recognize Phyllis. Now that Yack is in a coma, Phyllis gets to live what it was like for Jack when she was in a coma. Will Yack go to Georgia for experimental treatment, or will he wake up in Genoa City Memorial with no memories of his partnership with Victor, truly believing that he is Jack Abbott, Victor's sworn enemy? Yack might even be a more formidable opponent than Jack!

I'm not quite sure why Neil is going along with Victor's plan to fleece the Abbotts. I guess he thinks he's doing what Jack wants, but I have to wonder how much brain matter got zapped away with Neil's eyesight. Maybe Neil thinks he owes Victor and Nikki or maybe Neil is still bitter about how Devon and Hilary betrayed him and just doesn't care that much about anyone else or what happens to them.

It didn't take Devon and Hilary very long to hit the sheets again. Hilary wants to sneak around like before, but I'm with Devon. Better that everyone knows what's what and to let the chips fall where they will. The damage has been done. Devon and Hilary might as well make themselves happy because everyone who was going to be miserable if Devon and Hilary got together will stay miserable even if Devon and Hilary split up, so at least Devon and Hilary can be happy, and all Devon's money should help ease the pain -- just sayin'.

Sage and Nick joined the ranks of couples that have parted ways. Nick did it for Faith, who understandably needs as much familiarity and stability in her life as possible. Hopefully, now that Sharon's been cleared, Nick will stop being so controlling and will allow Faith to spend time with Sharon again. Sharon did not frame herself. She is innocent, so it would be unfortunate if Nick blamed Sharon for anything that has happened and continues to punish both Sharon and Faith by keeping them apart.

I guess Nick could blame Sharon for jumping bail and showing up at the Underground, though her attitude about being there certainly lent credence to that "I'm too dumb" defense. One could argue that if Sharon had not gone to the opening and been arrested, Sharon would not have had the opportunity to convince Christine of her innocence. It was a win-win for both ladies. I sure did love the dress and jacket combo and jewelry that Sharon was wearing -- talk about your little black dress!

Sharon wasn't too dumb to intercept Avery's text and snag a lengthy kiss from Dylan. I have no doubt that they will end up in bed together soon, probably just in time for Avery to walk in on them, or maybe Nick, or both. Noah is the one I feel really sorry for. Courtney was the only girl in town his own age who wasn't a relative. I suppose Noah and Nick could both date Sage. After all, Nick and Victor both married Sharon.

Even though it was very unBillylike for Billy to be so cruel to Chelsea, I'm glad they did not get married in a wedding where yet another bride vowed undying love to one man while pining for another. This is such an old soap opera chestnut, and we just saw it done with Hilary and Neil, so thank you, writers, for that. It's obvious that Chelsea still loves Adam, and by extension, Gabe, though she doesn't know why. How long before Chelsea is going to recognize something familiar? How can Adam be the love of Chelsea's life if she does not recognize him in the dark? I did agree with Anita when she called Gabe "a hunka hunka burning love!" Man is he ever! Too bad Gabe is an egomaniacal jerk most of the time with almost everyone except Chelsea.

I will admit that I have seen a lot of improvement in The Young and the Restless over the last two years, but one thing that has not improved is the plotting and the storytelling, which is lazy and predictable. I would prefer a little more controversy and a lot more originality, but Y&R is number one for a reason, and I have a hunch that it's because Y&R tells stories that are more "middle of the road." They offend the fewest number of people and reach the greatest audience. Luckily, the acting and dialogue is terrific. I just think of Jack's twin story as a rerun and hope Peter Bergman gets to have some fun with the role. He's got me convinced that Jack and Yack are two different people!

Sunday is Mother's Day. Until next time, fellow fan addicts, I hope all of you who have children and/or living parents have a wonderful day of love and joy with your family. For those who don't, meet me at Crimson Lights, and I'll treat you to imaginary coffee while we conduct imaginary conversations with our imaginary friends.

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