Harmony and me, we're pretty good company

Harmony's dead, Willow's an orphan, Nina is clueless, Carly is kind to a killer, Liz is dry, and all sorts of other confusing circumstances to discuss in this Sweeps week GH Two Scoops.

Dear readers, this week's title is a nod to Elton John, whom I saw last weekend in concert as part of his Farewell Yellow Brick Road tour. My all-time favorite Elton song from my teen years was "Harmony." Since it fits our theme and I can sneak it in, I had to. If Elton's tour comes to your town, I highly recommend attending.

Captain Fantastic plugs over -- now, back to GH.

I am a fan of Inga Cadranel. From the day Harmony appeared on our TV screens as Shiloh's right hand at Dawn of Day, she gave believable performances. She was a villain but a victim all at once, and she played every nuance so beautifully. As the months passed and Harmony did her time, was rehabilitated, and got released, I foolishly believed Harmony was in the midst of a redemption storyline. She became a caring and supportive friend to Alexis in prison. She was working to rebuild her relationship with Willow and become a grandma to Wiley. But out of the blue, with no warning, we discovered that Harmony was Neil Byrnes's murderer.

Wait, what? Did we ever see them in any scenes together? Did their paths cross? If so, I must have blacked out because I don't recall Neil and Harmony having any sessions together.

I suppose I should have known better. I have been watching soaps now for five decades. Everyone warned Alexis not to let Harmony move in with her. I thought there would be a season of Harmony having to prove herself to everyone, like Franco after the serial killer brain tumor was removed.

But nope. The writers made Harmony into Neil's murderer, Brendon's murderer, and almost Alexis and Carly's murderer, too. I don't understand why the writers take so much time tenderly redeeming a character like Harmony or Franco just to kill them off. I'm sad to see Inga leave GH. I thought Harmony had so many stories left to tell. Why was she so drawn to Shiloh? What was Willow's dad like? How did she end up so vulnerable to cult leaders? Would she go back to school and try to help other young vulnerable women avoid men like Shiloh? We will never know.

But all that Harmony love aside, this sudden twist has made for some fantastic drama on GH this week.

We suspected for eons that Willow was Nina's real daughter, and now we know our suspicions were accurate. Carly knows, too. And...she's going to stay silent. Because she promised Harmony. The woman who drugged her, stuffed her in a car trunk, and planned to kill her. Is she motivated by loyalty to her attempted murderer, getting revenge on Nina, or both?

If this were not a PG, family-friendly site, I would say a bad word right now. WT*

Seeing Carly at Harmony's deathbed, holding her hand, and listening to her tearful plea, making Harmony promises -- after she was almost just killed by Harmony -- is unfathomable. Carly has sworn enemies she has vowed to destroy simply because they gave her a dirty look at Jake's bar. Who is this caring, compassionate woman who can instantly overlook the fact that Harmony was going to murder her to keep her deathbed secret?

So, what now? Will we have months of Willow searching for her birth mother while Carly sits by, holding her hand, pretending to help, and knowing that she is Nina's child? Gross. I hope not.

I predict that Carly will finally come clean when Nina is about to win her custody battle for Wiley. Nina will say something like, "Willow, you aren't even related to Wiley." Carly will be unable to contain herself and blurt out, "Actually, Willow is his biological aunt, bitch." And then a catfight will ensue, and hair will be pulled. Michael and Willow will remove Carly from Wiley's life for lying to them. Because Wiley is the pawn they use to punish people they are mad at. Seriously, Wiley would have been better off with Brad and Lucas. (Side note, will we ever get any scenes with Brad and Lucas?)

Also, while I am on this topic, I understand that Nancy Lee Grahn had surgery and had to be out. I adore her, and I want her to take care of herself and recover and heal completely. But I think this storyline packed less punch because we had a substitute, Alexis, for the thrilling climax!

We watched GH build up this beautiful friendship between Alexis and Harmony all these months, so to see it all come crashing down without Nancy on-screen was a severe disappointment to me. I understand this was Sweeps month, and the writers planned this big revelation for this exact week, but I wish they could have waited until we could see Nancy in those jaw-dropping scenes.

I hope when NLG returns, they will refilm the entire thing so we can see Nancy play it out with Inga in flashbacks. I want to see Nancy's Alexis find out that Harmony killed Neil. I want to see her face. I will not be satisfied without those scenes!

Next in line: Sasha. Readers, I would swear I saw Sasha pop a pill that day. Did she miss her mouth all the times she tried to pop a pill? I guess so, because, apparently, her blood test came back clean. If Sasha caves in to pressure and gives the sleazy photographer his memory card back, he will paint her as a drugged-out driver who caused a woman's death. Deception's stock will tumble, and they will all be broke again.

Jordan asked Dante to find Willow's real birth parents because...why? Hasn't she heard of Ancestry DNA? I did an ancestry test last year and found two new secret relatives. (Seriously)

So, the one lone detective in Port Charles will work on hunting down Willow's birth parents instead of solving all the other cases in Port Charles, like catching Esme for the sex tape leak or finding out who is stalking Liz?

Liz. Liz. Liz. So many theories have been tossed out, and my friend and fellow columnist Liz threw Ric's name into the ring. I love that idea because I love Rick Hearst, and we discussed that Ric could be the rival West Coast mob leader gunning for Sonny. Ric is capable of being a stalker. I recall Carly being locked in the panic room. Anyone else?

I don't think the writers love us enough to make Franco come back to life, even though we asked nicely and begged them to undo that boneheaded move of killing him off.

Instead, I think it's probably Liz. I think she has a split personality, and I believe her alter ego, Biz, is responsible for all the destruction. Why? Because no matter where Liz goes or how much security there is, the mayhem continues. Because when her room at the Metro Court was trashed, she said she was in the shower, but she was totally dry and had full makeup on. The common denominator is Liz.

I don't want it to be Ghost Franco because that means Franco is dead. I'd rather have it be the gloriously alive Franco suffering from a tiny, totally treatable brain tumor. We have also discussed Heather, but I have not heard any rumblings about Robin Mattson coming to town. I don't know, but I want it resolved one way or another.

Maybe Liz can figure it out over a manicure. They must have invested a lot of money in the new manicure parlor set because, suddenly, everyone in town is getting mani-pedis. We have seen Scott, Ava, Finn, Violet, Liz, and Terry getting their nails done in two weeks. This is not a complaint; I love a good mani-pedi. When I was in San Diego, my BFF and my daughter and I used to go and get our nails done together at the beach.

At the nail salon, we learned that Amy and Terry hate each other. Of course, because Terry wants to date Chet, we must make Terry into Amy's enemy, so Amy can demand that her brother Chet not date her. Hey, if it gives Terry a storyline, I'm willing to take the ride.

I don't trust Chet's friend Dex. I've been calling him Rando Jason. He's a little too perfect. Sonny is auditioning him for a Jason Jr. role. Here's the thing, I think Dex is probably a plant from that West Coast mob trying to infiltrate Sonny's organization. If Sonny trusts his life to Dex, I fear he won't make it. Am I being paranoid, or are you apprehensive about Dex, too?

With Maurice Benard hinting that he's contemplating retirement, every storyline makes me wonder if the writers are, step by step, trying to extract Sonny from his life and from our hearts to ease the blow. I remember how they turned Luke into Fluke near the end and drove us all mad. I wonder if they intend to take the same strategy and ruin 30 years of Sonny's character until we won't be so brokenhearted when he eventually leaves.

Readers, I love Maurice Benard. I love his State of Mind show on YouTube, I think it's essential work, and I understand why he is drawn to it. But I hope he stays with GH a little longer and that if he really does plan to retire, I hope Sonny gets a fitting end.

I was angry when Dante told Sonny that Carly was almost murdered and that Sonny didn't go to her. Really, writers? On what planet would Sonny not run to Carly, knowing she almost lost her life? Has Sonny's two-month fling with Nina erased his decades of life with Carly? I mean, most of the time he was with Nina, he was "Mike." Sonny must still love Carly. Vintage Sonny would not care whether he got a courtesy call from Carly. Sonny would have gone to her, anyway. He would also have checked on Alexis, the mother of his invisible daughter Kristina who should be on every week but rarely is.

I want Kristina on canvas to be on Sonny's side and to rip Michael to shreds for his treatment of his father. Michael playing holier than thou over Sonny sleeping with Nina after he slept with Willow while she was married to Chase makes me want a bulldog-like Kristina to call him out on his hypocrisy. Dear writers, please give me those scenes, I beg you. I want Kristina to pummel him. He slept with Kiki while she was with his brother, he slept with Willow while she was with Chase, he's a total hypocrite, and Kristina should be the one to tell him because Lexi Ainsworth is a powerhouse. Why GH doesn't use her constantly is beyond me.

One of the most beautiful scenes of the week was between T.J. and Britt. T.J. is becoming one of my favorites. Tajh Bellow is such a soulful performer. When T.J.'s heart broke after losing his first patient, mine broke. And Kelly Thiebaud's Britt supporting and nurturing him through that experience was so poignant and tender. It's easy to see why Kelly was nominated for a Daytime Emmy. Her portrayal of Britt this past year has been so nuanced and delightful. She turned Britt from "the Britch" into one of the characters with the most heart.

Many of our GH cast made the cut: Sydney Mykala as Trina, Willam Lipton as Cam, Nicholas Chavez as Spencer (I can't imagine Eden McCoy not making the cut -- to be honest, she deserves to be in there with them!) in the Younger Performer category; Cynthia Watros and Laura Wright in the Lead Actress Category; Nancy Lee Grahn and Kelly Thiebaud in the Supporting Actress category; my beloved James Patrick Stuart and Jeff Kober in the Supporting Actor category; and Robert Gossett as a Guest Performer. Maurice Benard reportedly did not submit his name for Emmy contention this year. So that begs the question: Are there no other male leads on General Hospital other than Sonny Corinthos? If that's true, is that something that is... problematic? Is it possible that there are other "Lead Actor" performers, but they just don't see themselves that way?

In another sweet scene this week, Chase babysitting Violet and playing tea party with her was precious. When Brook Lynn showed up with light sabers, it was even better. I am impatiently waiting for those two crazy kids to finally get together.

Readers, are you tired of hearing me say I don't like Maxie and Austin together as a couple? I hope not because I am going to repeat it. I do not prefer these two as a couple. I would rather see Maxie back with Spinelli and have Austin be a love match for Britt, or better yet, kill Austin and bring Franco back. Is that harsh?

A soap coupling is a funny thing. Some people have chemistry in spades, and it's undeniable and totally watchable. Did you see the scene with Anna and Robert this week? Even as exes sitting on the couch, watching Hulu together, they have mad chemistry. They just do. You cannot manufacture it. That's my opinion. What is yours? Do you love Austin and Maxie and think I am completely wrong? I'd love to know.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Felicia get pregnant at 59 years old? Will Mac find out Ethan is really his son because he, too, secretly slept with Holly and then go track down Holly since she is still caged up somewhere? Will Valentin be shocked when Charlotte comes home from boarding school at Christmas as a 19-year-old? Will Ghost Lenny give Sonny more sage advice and more cowboy hats? Will Marshall buy a new hat while he is away?

Will Finn realize Liz is more drama than he anticipated and start looking for her sister Hayden again? Will Lucy and Martin become the new power couple on the Port Charles social scene until Cyrus gets released from prison and tries to shake them down? Will Dante continue to be the only one of Sonny's kids to have a relationship with him? Will Gladys destroy the photo memory card rather than see Sasha exposed as an addict? Will Sam continue to wear that gorgeous kimono dress around town? (I would if I had it. I'd wear it grocery shopping. With a tiara.) Will Spinelli please match Austin with...anyone other than Maxie?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

What are your thoughts on General Hospital? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- so drop your comments in the Comments section below, tweet about it on Twitter, share it on Facebook, or chat about it on our Message Boards.