A Taylor-made nervous breakdown

Hope thinks Taylor will hurt her or Brooke. Bill says Taylor only has ire for him. Brooke and Liam fear Kelly will somehow be hurt. Steffy and Ridge don't even see Taylor as an issue. Whose baby will be hurt by Taylor's incessant vendettas? Hope's, Steffy's, Brooke's, or her own?

Parents can be embarrassing to their children, even well into adulthood. Despite how old you are, they always see you as their little baby. They show off your naked baby pictures and call you "Miss Poo" in public. They lick their thumbs and wipe crumbs off your face. They tell friends about the times you peed in your shoes, almost ate a live bug, and almost suffocated to death because you stuck bread up your nose. Don't ask.

How about the time your mother blew your cover as a fierce, independent, and single mom by telling a room full of your employees that you'd be with your ex-husband that very day had another coworker not stolen him right out from under you? Well, hold Taylor's lemon water, because you've just entered Steffy's life, where her mother can embarrass the crap out of her at a party, no liquor required.

Maybe everyone could have gotten the same impression, without Taylor saying a word, simply by looking at the enormous portrait of Steffy and Hope's husband on the wall. Everyone except the newcomer and Zoe's father, Reese Buckingham, that is. Lucky for Zoe, before her dad could give her second-degree parental embarrassment burns, Taylor piqued his interest by unloading on him about what the meanie blondes had done to the poor, defenseless "widdle" brunettes.

I can't tell whether Reese is just nosy, has an agenda, or is genuinely attracted to Taylor. At the party, he was sopping Taylor and her sob story up like biscuits in a plate of honey. While he was charming the psycho out of her, was anyone wondering if, eventually, "Wayne Brady is gonna have to choke a bitch?"

If Reese Buckingham is as vicious as Wayne Brady's Chappelle Show persona, him hooking up with the murderous Taylor is terrifying. Steffy and Ridge would say it's nonsense and that Taylor isn't dangerous. But all I can hear is Dave Chappelle yelling, "Run! Run for your life!"

Opinions might still be formulating about whether Taylor is as far off her rocker as some claim, but I'm definitely suspicious about why Reese is interested in her. He arrived in town at just the right time, and he's an OB/GYN. It makes me suspect the writers are cooking up trouble for the Logan women. Hope better stick with Dr. Phillips, and Brooke better never need another Pap smear because there's no telling what Taylor might put Dr. Buckingham up to -- or what he might do for misguided love.

Just when you thought you know where the newest plot involving Taylor and the shooting was going, new avenues opened up this week, making anything possible. Brooke, Liam, and Hope keep harping on Taylor's instability, making viewers imagine that Hope and Brooke could be in danger from Taylor's wrath. I would have bet my last two cents that Taylor would cause Hope to lose her baby, but Brooke and Liam fear that Kelly is the one in danger.

Hope thinks Taylor might hurt her or her mother. Bill believes Taylor's ire is focused solely on him. Steffy and Ridge don't even see what the problem is. Let's get two scoops deep into the threats Taylor poses on The Bold and the Beautiful.

This week, Pam was up to her old tricks again. The tricks are as stale as her lemon bars, and just like the lemon bars, they keep coming and coming. Eric has yet to learn that he needs to tell Pam when enough is enough of either one of them. While Eric and Quinn minded their own business, being the cute, loving, flirty married couple they are, Pam was at her desk, scheming up ways to chuck Donna like a wrench into their matrimonial bliss.

Opportunity struck when Eric's regular model couldn't make her fitting. Quinn joked about modeling for him, but he told her that it was unprofessional for a designer to work with a model he desired. Hmm...that must be a new, 2018 policy Eric implemented to promote family unity.

Either Pam missed the memo about that policy, or it went straight over her head that, when Eric readily agreed to let Donna stand in for Leslie, he was inadvertently declaring that he isn't attracted to Donna. Here's hoping Quinn got that memo and understands that Eric isn't attracted to Donna instead of Quinn getting upset that he turned her down to model but let Donna do it.

While Pam was making love out of nothing at all between Donna and Eric, Steffy and Ridge were making nothing at all out of Taylor's violent, erratic behavior. I'm not saying Taylor doesn't have a legitimate beef with Brooke or Bill -- but -- somebody had better check that woman before she wrecks herself and somebody else. With all the heavy hints in the dialogue dropping about that precious Kelly, I'm starting to fear that the "somebody" else might be her.

Hope told Brooke that Taylor shot Bill, and Hope had the nerve to look surprised when Brooke flew off on her golden broomstick to confront the bad witch. I guess Hope thought Brooke would take her own advice and stay away from the crazed shooter who hates Brooke more than anyone; however, Brooke fears nothing when there's finally a pedestal of self-righteousness with her name on it.

Brooke at least had sense enough to check if Taylor was packing before Brooke unloaded on her. That way, Brooke only had to worry about whose face would go numb first in a slap-a-thon.

In Brooke's book, attempted murder trumps sluttiness every day of the week. Taylor deserved to have her nose rubbed firmly in it for berating Brooke for pooping where she sleeps when Taylor was playing target practice with the man who'd been in Steffy's extramarital bed.

Oh, you're gonna get it now, Taylor! At least that's what I was thinking until Brooke landed at the cliff house, parked her broom, and turned into the psychiatrist's therapist. Like Clarice with Hannibal Lecter, Brooke wanted to understand how Taylor had become a killer.

"Not that you've killed anyone yet, but it's the thought that counts," Brooke practically said. Huh? Do you remember Darla, Brooke? I know you do. You are not that blonde. "Accidental" killings must be in Steffy's maternal DNA. Just ask Aly. Oh, you can't ask Aly, can you? She's dead! Just like her mama. If Taylor wants to worry about history repeating itself with the daughters, she ought to take a little look at that.

I love seeing Brooke get a chance to lord something over Taylor. The opportunities are rare. The only other thing I remember Brooke bringing Taylor down about was sleeping with James -- which was what ended Taylor's sham of a marriage to Ridge, not Brooke.

What I do not love is seeing Taylor weak, whiny, and pathetic in the process. Stephanie would have slapped Taylor's knees straight if she'd seen her kneeling down, touching Brooke's feet and begging Brooke not to tell on her. Yes, child. On her knees, begging. Begging worse than Jodeci. If you did not see it, you need to get ahold of that footage.

Brooke claimed she would show Taylor mercy for Ridge and Steffy's sakes, but I think Brooke probably decided not to tell the police because she doubted Detective Sanchez could handcuff a jellyfish. Jellyfish can still sting, so Brooke warned that she'd be watching Taylor.

Don't worry, Taylor fans. As it turns out, the begging wasn't even genuine. Once Brooke was gone, Taylor dusted her knees off, straightened her blouse, and kept right on blaming Brooke and Bill for everything from Kelly's dirty diapers to Liam's lopsided head. Sometimes, you do what you gotta do, because prison orange will make Taylor's new hair color look washed out.

Like Brooke, Liam believes someone ought to be watching Taylor, too. He also says Taylor should not be watching Kelly. He and Brooke are on the same page about that, as well, but Steffy and Ridge think it's absurd. They believe Taylor only lashed out at Bill because he destroyed Steffy's life, but I ask you: what will Taylor do when Kelly spits up and destroys Steffy's brand-new hair weave?

Seriously, what can Kelly do that will rile Taylor up enough to hurt her on purpose or by accident? Something tells me I will regret asking that question.

Liam visited Bill to tell him that Hope knew about the shooting. Bill said that, at first, only four of them knew, but the more people they told, the more of a chance it had of getting out. Little did he know, Brooke was learning about it right then, which led to Steffy telling Ridge. If Taylor gets her hands on the wine at Steffy's party, the number could go up to eight or twelve, depending on how loud Taylor will be when she spills the secret to her new doctor friend.

Bill told Liam and Brooke that he was certain Taylor only had it out for him. Ridge feels the same way and said he couldn't fault Taylor for something he might have done himself. Taylor tried to get Ridge to side with her against Brooke, but Ridge told her to slow her roll when it came to his wife. He agreed to protect Taylor, but he insisted that Brooke was only looking out for the family.

It's true. Brooke is only looking out for the family. I sense that she will have a big "I told you so" for everyone involved, even if she says it from a hospital bed or at someone else's funeral. I can't shake the feeling that somebody is going to get hurt, and Bill has already had his share of intensive care this year.

Steffy threw an appreciation party for her team at her house. Zoe showed up with her father and Xander, whom she forgot to tell to change out of his modeling clothes first. What was that silk, Beetlejuice pajama get-up he had on? Seriously, Xander. Don't wear that again.

Zoe's father, Reese Buckingham, took an immediate and sinister liking to Taylor. Well, maybe it wasn't sinister. Maybe I just think it's creepy for any sane human being to be attracted to the looney tunes she was emanating that night. "Crazy" was her opening act, and Reese stayed around for Act II: Everything Brooke Really Didn't Do to Taylor.

Act I began when Reese assumed Steffy was married to the man in the humongous portrait with her. Steffy explained that she and Liam were divorced, and it was okay. "But it's not okay," Taylor asserted, and the whole party stopped. If you listened hard enough, you heard the proverbial record scratch. All the eyes in the room fell on Steffy and Taylor. Steffy asked Taylor not to start, but you know Taylor. Once you start her up, she never stops. Never, never, never stops.

Taylor wasn't satisfied until everyone in the room heard that Hope stole Liam just like Brooke had stolen Ridge. Steffy said no one wanted to be bored by the story. "I'm not bored," Reese replied. So intrigued was he that he continued the conversation with Taylor in private, where she began Act II. She revealed that she was a recovering alcoholic, another woman completely ruined her life, and her bra size is a 38D. You know, in case he's the gift-buying type.

Taylor didn't know why it was so easy to tell Reese those things. I do not know, either, because if this had been a speed-dating event, he should have already hit the buzzer and moved to the next chick. Talk about baggage. Taylor is carrying a freight ship around with her, all cargo boxes fully loaded and ticking.

What man would be intrigued by all of this unless he had some sort of agenda of his own? We learned that Reese isn't British. Zoe's mother is. Zoe's parents divorced when Zoe was very little. He claims to feel as strongly about his daughter as Taylor does about hers, which can't be healthy. He is an OB/GYN doing some sort of mysterious "research" in Catalina. As long as Taylor doesn't find out that he's researching the eight-month-after pill, Hope will be okay.

I don't know what Reese is up to, but we do know Taylor has a tendency of falling back on unhealthy relationships. Let me see, there was Brooke's father, Hector, Pierce, James, and her ex-husband before Ridge. And didn't she pick a guy up in a bar before? Maybe I'm wrong. Let me know in the comments if you remember. I think this thing with Reese is headed for Bad Idea City. I suspect Taylor is his Quinn, and Reese is her Deacon. That kind of Bad Idea City.

In other happenings this week, Bill and Liam bonded a bit over the terror that is Taylor. Though Liam doubts he and his father can get back to the way they'd been, he did say they could get back to "something." Most people say that something is better than nothing, but most people haven't had Bill as a father. After getting a load of Taylor, Liam might have decided Bill ain't so bad, after all.

Justin still can't believe Bill has given up on "Sky"; however, Bill insists that his head is out of the clouds, and he wants to rebuild his life at ground level. Justin suspects Bill intends to do it in Brooke's pastures. Considering the way Brooke and Ridge bonded at the end of the week, I wonder if anything short of a Taylor-nami can tear them apart.

Taylor used to be a major threat to Bridge. Contrary to what Taylor claims, she is the one who caused Brooke and Ridge's numerous divorces and/or breakups. Taylor and Ridge probably had the longest-running marriage on the show. It wasn't until Taylor's second return from death -- when her kids were practically grown -- that Ridge began choosing Brooke over Taylor. In those times, he chose Brooke because schemes to patch Tridge together had fallen apart.

Could the fight to keep Taylor out of jail rekindle Tridge? Unless the writers are hellbent on Brill, I doubt it. However, we can look forward to more heated arguments between Brooke and Ridge as she tries to get him to see that whether he likes Taylor's reasons for shooting Bill or not, the bitch is still crazy and shouldn't be around kids. Period.

And where would Bridge be if Taylor did indeed hurt Hope or cause her to miscarry? Ridge told Taylor that Hope wasn't his favorite, so maybe he doesn't care. Yep, you heard it right. The truth finally came out of his mouth. Hope, you've been right all along. And I hate to say it, but it means you probably ain't getting more HFTF money.

Wouldn't it be a tragedy if, instead of any of the theoretical victims of Taylor's like Kelly, the actual victim turns out to be Steffy, the one Taylor has been trying to protect? No one seems worried that Taylor would harm Steffy, even accidentally, but Jacqueline MacInnes Wood is going on maternity leave, isn't she? Ridge would be destroyed if Taylor wound up hurting Steffy worse than Bill ever had.

Taylor has brought to the show some much-needed humor and drama. I'm thrilled to see the show return to its roots -- deep-seated rivalries with historical context. My concern is that they might be painting Taylor into too wacky of a corner to get out of. I prefer a flawed Taylor, but I advise the writers to pull her back from the edge just enough for the show to contain her. We already have Quinn and Pam. Too much crazy can spoil the pot.

Let us know if you're enjoying having Taylor around and if you'd like to see her stay. Is she really a danger to anyone else, let alone her granddaughter? Even if not intentionally, do you think one of her hissy fits could lead to Kelly getting hurt? Like when Ivy fell down the stairs or collided with electrical wires because she and Steffy could not stop clashing with each other? With Brooke's luck, Taylor will shove her into the changing table, and Kelly will sail out the window and over the cliffs.

Reese Buckingham might really interested in the wacky, dangerous Taylor. He could turn out to be Charlie or her Deacon. Judging by the chemistry that the two had at the party, I sense they'll soon be repurposing the therapy couch!

In next week's preview video, The Sure Bet, Sally and Wyatt discuss the "L" word. Taylor lets Brooke know that she isn't going anywhere, and Bill wonders exactly what Brooke wants him to do. Reese and Taylor share a kiss, and Zoe expresses concern about her philandering father.

Other spoilers indicate that Taylor opens up more to Reese. People in Taylor's orbit continue to worry about what she is capable of, and Brooke becomes upset when she finds Taylor alone with Kelly. Taylor and Steffy discuss Phoebe, a topic well worth probing because, this week, Taylor revealed that she had to protect Steffy because of Phoebe.

Thank you for taking the time to scoop with me. Mike will be back next week, but when we reconvene, I'll be taking a look back at the year and judge the best, the worst, and the downright soap-worthy moments of 2018! Until then, stay bold and beautiful, baby!

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