A world of hurts

Victor's improving condition put J.T. in a world of hurt, so he pulled Victor's plug. Ashley may have to upend Jack's world in order to stop Kyle now that Dina's revelations about the past have put the Abbotts in a world of hurt. Read all about it in this week's Two Scoops.

The hits just keep coming for Jack, and despite the fact that he annoys me when he gets on his holier-than-thou high horse, I feel really, really sorry for him right now. Especially because he has been arrested by the least thorough, most incompetent police force on the planet. Not only did they fail to find the blood that did not belong to Victor at the crime scene -- surely the staff can vouch for an immaculate, unbloodied staircase -- but they discounted Jack's explanation about the hard drive.

Christine was unwilling to set bail for Jack, even though he has been a lifelong resident and model citizen in Genoa City -- not to mention one of the major business owners in the area. If they were worried that Jack would flee the jurisdiction, why not fit him with an ankle monitor and take his passport away. Jack's arrest, in my opinion, was premature. I can't imagine that any competent police officer would make an arrest before all the facts were in. Surely, they should have questions for the person who belonged to the blood found at the scene of the crime.

Once the blood was established as being J.T.'s, there would be as many questions for him as for Jack. After all, J.T. did bring evidence to Paul that he claimed he got the day before, but his blood on the scene puts a lie to that and gives J.T. both motive and opportunity. A search of J.T.'s belongings might also turn up the recorded evidence that J.T. took away from the scene. These kinds of giant plot holes drive me nuts, so I'm taking a deep breath and repeating my favorite mantra in these situations, "It's only a soap!"

Okay, I feel a lot better now, so I'll move on to the second thing that has been bugging me all week, and that is, "When Ashley and Abby compared Traci's hair to Jack's, how could they be sure that Traci is John Abbott's child?" If neither Jack nor Ashley is John's child, who's to say that Traci is? Billy is the only Abbott that we can reasonably assume is John's child, so it's only his DNA that could provide a reliable test. If the result of the DNA test was that Jack and Traci have different fathers, then it could just as easily be Jack who is John's true child as Traci, because Dina is obviously not completely reliable when it comes to her memory of the men she slept with while she was married to John. It could also be that neither Jack nor Traci is John Abbott's biological child.

Personally, I don't really like this story turn very much. Jack's whole character is tied up with being an Abbott. Losing that will be very tough on Jack and the whole Abbott clan. There will be no more Abbotts, just a bunch of Dina's children by different men. I wonder if Jack will still have the same love for Jabot and the same desire to protect his (not blood-related) father's legacy. In his shoes, I'd be very upset and in complete denial. I'd immediately demand a DNA test with Billy -- and so should Traci and Ashley, just to be 100% certain. On the up side, at least Jack will be able to smirk when Kyle gets his comeuppance.

I really don't like the new Kyle -- the character, not the actor, who I believe is playing the part exactly as intended in this new tougher version of Kyle. It's just that Kyle is smug and smarmy. He and Jack were so close at one time; I have to wonder what happened to change Kyle so drastically since he's been away from Genoa City and why he got so close to Victor. I wondered if Dina's mystery lover was Victor way back when. Wouldn't it be funny if Jack was Victor's son and Kyle was his grandson? Or maybe it was Paul Williams' dad (which would make Paul and Jack brothers) who was Dina's lover all those years ago.

Now, I know that some of you will point out that Jack is too old to be Victor's son, but when has that ever made a difference on a soap? As far as I can tell, anyone can be whatever age is needed to suit the plot or the coupling. I hardly dwell on it anymore. I just accept that Genoa City exists in a time warp. It's only a soap, after all.

Another person putting himself in a world of hurt is poor deluded Devon. Having a baby with Hilary the old-fashioned way is not going to work out well for him if his object is to have a life that only includes Hilary platonically. As Lily so wisely pointed out, having a child with Hilary pretty much guarantees that she will be in Devon's life forever. If Devon wants a physical, familial relation with any woman except Hilary, he'd better think long and hard, because most women would be less than thrilled with such an arrangement between Devon and his ex, especially an ex as dynamic and assertive as Hilary.

That said, in his heart of hearts, I don't think that Devon wants anyone else except Hilary. He just can't accept it. Having a child with Hilary is one way to keep her in his life, even if Devon can't admit that to himself. If Hilary does get pregnant, I have no doubt that they will be remarried sometime around the birth of their baby, which, if true to soap opera baby birth norms, will occur in some place other than a hospital, and the baby will be delivered by someone other than a doctor, maybe Devon in a remote mountain cabin during a blinding snowstorm. I'd love to hear some of your predictions about where the next Genoa City baby will be born.

I don't know about you, but I think some of the clothes currently worn by the women are extremely strange and eerily attractive. I loved the coat that Nikki was wearing at Katherine's memorial -- loved the fight with Jill, also -- but some of the outfits last week made me think of the Hunger Games, and others, including a blue wraparound dress with big red flowers that Ashley wore, reminded me of my grandmother's bathrobe. Designing never-seen-before clothing must be a lot harder today than 70 years ago. I've seen so many changes in fashion styles in my lifetime that I'm amazed there are any new ideas at all, even those that are "out there" and those that are a little too bizarre for my "jeans and T-shirt" lifestyle.

I was going to drone on, but Pretty Kitty just jumped on my chest and put her soft little paws around my neck and laid her chin against mine. What a sweet and trusting little soul. I hear her purring in my ear, "You're getting sleepy. You're getting very, very sleepy."

Please excuse me; I need a nap.

Thanks again for letting me share my thoughts with you. As always, fellow fans, I welcome feedback about this column in the section provided below. I enjoy all your comments, even when you don't agree with me. Please return in two weeks for another edition of Two Scoops.

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