Eight million places to give birth in Genoa City

Adam did the noble thing when he delivered Sage's son. Neil and Gwen were almost nabbed by a tracking device. Nick blew up because Sage knew Adam's secret. Even when Victor was good, he was bad. Chelsea grieved Adam and prepared to leave town. Jack's man crush on Adam may destroy his relationship with Billy. Read on as Boone dishes on the denizens of Genoa City!

Apparently there is no need for baby doctors or midwives in Genoa City because any Tom, Dick, or Adam can deliver a premature baby in the park in unsanitary conditions, with no instruments, and all is well. And how quickly that baby appeared, like magic. I bet there are more than a few women out there who wish that their labor had been so easy that they couldn't make it to the local hospital or wait for an ambulance to arrive.

The very first time I saw a baby delivered on a soap in some place other than a hospital, it was thrilling, and I cried copious buckets of tears, but now it's routine, so when Adam delivered Sage's son in Chancellor Park and gave him life-saving CPR, it was ho-hum. By the way, if this was your first baby-delivery scene, then I apologize if I am spoiling the thrill, but for me, "The thrill is gone!"

There do seem to be a lot of places for "birthin'" babies in Genoa City besides Chancellor Park. Recently, Billy and Stitch delivered Katie in a janitor's closet. Stitch, at least, was a doctor, though unlicensed at the time. Before that, Dylan delivered Connor in the loft, just after Dylan and Chelsea were wed. I think Faith was the baby before that, and she was snatched. And way back, leading the pack, is Summer, who was born in an elevator, with Jack's assistance, during a power outage. There are probably more, but my head is hurting trying to remember if any women ever gave birth alone. I don't think so. It's fortunate that the mothers always have a helpful man around when the kids pop out. Have any women helped?

On a more serious note, I think that one of the reasons to have had Adam deliver and save Sage's son was that it gave him a measure of redemption for Delia's death. I had hoped that the writers would find a way to hold someone else responsible for Delia's accident, but now, in wake of the news that Justin Hartley might be tapped by CBS to play the new MacGyver, it would make more sense to send Adam off to prison. I don't think any of us could accept a replacement anytime soon. I had wondered how CBS had lured a nighttime guest star like Justin Hartley back to daytime. Now it seems possible that Hartley was promised a shot at a nighttime leading role if he played Adam for a year or so.

That seems fair to me. I loved the first MacGyver, and Hartley could be just as great in that part as Richard Dean Anderson was -- assuming Hartley's scripts are as good. We've been lucky to have Hartley as Adam, and I have enjoyed every moment of his performance. I would follow him as MacGyver and enjoy that also. Good looks and good acting are a charismatic combination, and Hartley has it all.

Okay, back to Delia's death. Even assuming that Adam is responsible, we all saw the accident; we know that Adam got out of his car and looked to see if he had hit anything. He did not find Delia or any sign of her. Delia's death was a tragic accident, not a cold-blooded act by Adam. Yes, he should have turned himself in, but he didn't because Billy prevented that from happening. Adam deserves a break, but I don't think he will get it from Christine or from Delia's family -- or even from most of his own.

Billy's anger is fresh again because Adam being alive is like ripping a scab off a wound and starting it bleeding again. This time, though, Billy is less likely to go off the rails. He has two other children to care for, and Billy is more anchored by Victoria. I've come to accept Burgess Jenkins as Billy, and I think that he is doing a good job at portraying Billy's feelings about Adam. I also think that he works well with Victoria, and I feel more chemistry between them, than say, Dylan and Sharon.

According to Bessie, there is a rumor going around that Delia is alive and will be returning, possibly with Chloe. Anything's possible on a soap. We do know that on one of her last appearances, Chloe had a vial of Billy's sperm. Perhaps she found a mad scientist and was able to create a second Delia and age her appropriately. I could accept that. They are going to need some Abbott girls to go with all those Newman boys being born.

I don't think that Billy is going to be quick to forgive Jack for keeping Adam's secret. Jack's reason, that he was protecting Billy, doesn't hold water. Jack should have told Paul and let the police sort it out. I think Jack has a man crush on Adam. Jack thinks that he has one up on Victor because he's closer to Adam than Victor is. Jack can posture and blame Victor for everything that's happened, but if Jack had outed Adam as Gabe when Gabe first appeared in Genoa City, everything that happened after that, including Marco and Paragon, would likely never have occurred. Victor also bears responsibility for his hurtful behavior, but I can understand how either titan would do whatever he had to do in order to protect his business and family legacy.

I was glad to see Phyllis stand by her man -- instead of leaving him -- when she found out that Jack had known that Gabe was Adam all along. At last -- though I never thought I would say this about Phyllis -- someone who is staying true to her wedding vows -- and Phyllis has had a lot of adversity in this latest marriage to Jack, so that is saying something. I like Tognoni in this part. I also like the change in her character that went along with the change in actors. Fresh out of her coma, Phyllis is the stable one, the level-headed one, the one who wants to do the right thing, and the one who could go head to head with Ian Ward and not flinch. She is woman -- hear her roar!

Gwen, on the other hand, is not so much roaring as squeaking. Is it just Bessie and I who think that Gwen and Neil fell in love a little too conveniently? And how needy is Gwen that she would willingly abet a kidnapping while declaring her undying love for a man that used her to steal her sister's badge and then verbally abused and rejected her repeatedly in front of others? I still can't believe that she and Neil are keeping Hilary alive in that drafty boathouse. Can't they at least close off the area that Hilary is in? Michael E. Knight will be appearing shortly. He might be the noise that Gwen heard on Friday. Knight is a sleazy doctor that Neil brings in to care for Hilary. We should get some intentional humor, which will be a welcome relief to all the unintentional laughs that this boathouse hospital has inspired in me.

Sharon, Patty Cake, and their shrink, Dr. Anderson, were flashing some strange looks on Friday. At first I thought that Patty Cake was up to no good, but now I think that Dr. Anderson is the villain of the piece! I think that Patty is right about the drugs that Sharon is taking. I believe the doctor knows that Sharon is not pregnant, but she is making Sharon think that she is. Further, I believe, that Dr. Anderson will steal Sage's baby and make Sharon think it is hers. Yeah, I know this is a far-out theory, all based on Dr. Anderson's smirk at the end of Friday's episode, but repeat after me, "It's only a soap!"

I can't say enough about how awful the character of Devon is being written. From annoying references to Hilary as "my wife," (to me, it makes her sound like property, without an identity of her own) to constantly throwing his weight around as he makes bad decision after bad decision, including the latest faux paux -- not getting proof of life (TV 101) -- Devon looks less and less admirable, especially now that he's blaming Dylan instead of himself for not nabbing the self-proclaimed kidnappers and getting Hilary back. Had Devon listened to his advisors, let the police in on his plan, or just kept his mouth shut, then he might at least know that the self-admitted kidnappers were faking it, and he wouldn't have to work himself into a snit.

I do not like dumb, hotheaded, ber-rich Devon. He's an idiot, throwing his money around and flailing like an out-of-control dervish. He would be better advised to listen to those with more experience and knowhow. I cringed as the group that knew about the trackers on the medical supplies grew, but when Gwen revealed that her sister had told her and that the whole hospital knew, I wondered why the police couldn't keep their mouths shut either. I also wondered why they didn't start following the tracking device as soon as it left the hospital or why they couldn't tell where it had been or that it had been in the boathouse for quite a while before Neil destroyed it. I know, "It's only a soap!" However, we can all track our cell phones wherever they've been, so maybe the police should have put one of those in the box instead of a useless tracker!

Some other things I found humorous: From her hospital bed, Sage said to Nick, "You keep your promises." I snorted and thought, "I don't think so, just ask Sharon." I'm still ticked at Nick over that one. He promised that nothing, nothing -- including the secret that Sharon could not remembered but feared would break them up -- would cause Nick to turn his back on Sharon, and guess what -- it did. Nick did not keep his word. And honestly, I don't understand how he can forgive Sage, a woman he's known less than a year, while treating Sharon, a woman with a medical problem and the mother of two of his children, so badly. Nick's armor is certainly tarnished in my eyes.

I also don't understand why Y&R persists in breaking up couples with great chemistry -- Nick and Sharon -- in favor of those with poor or none -- Nick and Sage, Dylan and Sharon. Last year, Y&R had a wonderful opportunity to tell a story of family, true love, and redemption that would have been a powerful tearjerker, but in a good way, not in the sad Delia way. But the writers didn't do that. They took the formulaic solution instead, and if ratings are an indication, then that's working for them. "If it ain't broke, don't fix it" seems to be the reigning philosophy for Y&R, and if I were running the show I don't know that I would do it any differently, but I can still dream.

It bothers me that Victor can't just spit out, "I love you, son. I always have, no matter what you do or have done." He and Adam always seem to go at cross purposes. I did think that Eric Braeden's performance was terrific last week. He and Justin Hartley worked so well together. I so badly wanted Victor and Adam to hug, cry, and forgive each other. It seemed like they were always just on the verge of doing that. Both men are terrific at communicating to the audience with the twitch of an eyebrow or a tiny smile. I look forward to next week as Victor testifies for Adam and Adam goes after the Paragon virus, while all the Abbotts go after Adam. One viewer, Pia, wrote that she would love to have a grandfather as debonair, handsome, and loving as Victor. So would I, Pia, so would I! Oh wait, I did have one, but that was 40 years ago. Now I want another.

I noticed that the Newmans are about to have another big party, which, according to gossip, will result in several tragic losses. I can't remember when the Newmans have ever given a big party where there wasn't an incident of one kind or another that had elements of tragedy. Actually, there aren't very many big gatherings in Genoa City where something untoward doesn't occur. In fact, if I lived in Genoa City, I think I'd decline all invitations issued by the founding families, particularly if they were issued during a sweeps period.

In closing, I got the biggest laugh of the week from Bessie, who wrote that the latest nickname for Y&R in the chatrooms is "The young and the rest of us!" I'm still smiling.

Until next time, fellow fan addicts, when we meet at Crimson Lights for coffee, croissants, and laughs with Esther, the latest -- and most welcome -- barista, please remember that while you can talk freely to your imaginary friends in private, public conversations with them might land you in Fairview!

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