Cane's not able

Cane Ashby might be the dumbest man in Genoa City. What does his lack of brains say about the Australian educational system?

What a week that was, don't you think, fans? I'm not even going to start with Nikki's fall from grace to the gutter. No, let's start with the dumbest man in Genoa City...Cane Ashby. What does his lack of brains say about the Australian educational system? Here's why I'm being so hard on Cane: HE'S AN IDIOT! Okay, let's take it apart bit by bit. He was lucky enough to find Lily, lose Lily, win Lily back, help her overcome cancer, and become the father of her two babies, and yet he's risking it all by not telling Lily the truth about his past. Are you kidding me? For Cane to be this short-sighted about his future, and hers, is sheer lunacy.

But that's not all. Based on what happened on Friday, Cane's plan to protect his family and himself is to fake an identity and rip off Chancellor Industries. Hello, Katherine, do you mind if I steal from your company? Oh, Neil, is it okay if I defraud the business you're running? Yes, that's a terrific plan. Goodness knows Cane wouldn't want to do something wise like tell the truth. And what sense would it make for Cane to sit down with Neil and Kay and some other big shots in town like Jack and Victor, to ask for help dealing with these guys. Did it ever occur to Cane that maybe he could work with the authorities to sting these Aussie blokes and save himself? Like I said, the man is an idiot, and this is a Maria Arena Bell candidate for stupid story of the year.

What can I say about Nikki's situation? What Meggie and Deacon are doing is heinous, but considering the fact that Victor and Nikki are well over the age of 25, they should be onto these kinds of scams, don't you think? As I mentioned last time, Victor was more suspicious of Estella, who'd been in his employ for 20 years, than he's been of Meggie. How long has he known Meggie, two minutes? Suddenly, Victor trusts Meggie to follow Nikki and to monitor her activities? If Victor really wanted to watch Nikki, why not ask Paul to trail her? At least Paul truly cares about Nikki, and he's a real private detective. Vic's probably too proud to ask for his help.

By the way, as one of our readers pointed out, Nikki has not been sober for 17 years. Maria clearly forgot that Nikki had a major relapse in Mexico when she chased after Victor, who was in mourning for Sabrina. I'm sure you all remember that. Just like I'm sure that you all remember that Adam's going blind. La Bell wants us all to forget that he supposedly has limited peripheral vision. Why else would she ask us to believe that Adam could see Sharon lurking in the hallway while he and Nick were going at it...again. Sorry, Maria, but Adam's convertible blindness is just lame. Either give him real retinitis pigmentosa or a miracle surgery to fix his eyes!

It would be nice if Sharon would just make up her mind about Adam. If she wants to be with him, if she see something in him that nobody else does, than she owes it to Nick to tell him how she really feels. Nick has a nasty streak of Victor inside him that makes him want to be as controlling and smug as his old man. Sharon is just too damn indecisive for me. She's the queen of wishy-washy.

The one thing Nick has done right, however, is get away from Phyllis. I realize she has good reason to hate Diane, but really, that online story was just vicious. Jack was right when he pointed out that Phyllis wouldn't like to see her life story delineated in the pages of Restless Style for all -- including Summer -- to read. Diane is going to be mightily embarrassed when Kyle reads the story, and with the Web being the way it is, I expect he'll see it by next week.

Too bad Billy and Phyllis can't turn their focus on Meggie! We got another hint about her nefarious past this week. When Murphy was trying to communicate with Kay, Meggie warned him to stop using Morse code and said she'd learned the code from Murphy's son. Then there was that snippet of Meggie in mourning, the implication being that Murphy's son -- her husband -- had died. Now, are we going to find out that Meggie killed him? Is that what Murphy knows about Meggie, that she got away with murder?

That she wound up in Ottawa and crossed paths with Victor, however, seems very random. Of all the bars, in all the world, Meggie just happens to be running the joint where Victor came looking for Adam? I sure hope it's not random. It would be a much better story if all the loose ends were tied up. I don't know how, but I'm hopeful.

Another thing about Murphy, I realize that the whole "locked-in" syndrome is serious and they're playing it as a tragic turn for Kay, but I'm a bit puzzled. Kay can bring in every doctor in the state of Wisconsin or fly Murphy to the Mayo Clinic, and yet there's not a therapist to work with him to master the blinking yes and no? If I were Kay, I'd have every expert in the world who understands this syndrome consulting. With today's technology, surely there's something they can do to help Murphy break through.

The J.T. and Mac storyline looks like it's going to have a happy ending. When I heard about the car crash, I wondered if they were writing Thad Luckinbill out in a coffin. Instead it seems like Mac and J.T. will find a way to depart Genoa City together.

One last thought, what did you think of that elevator encounter between Skye and Victor? On the surface, I didn't think much of it, just a chance encounter between two characters that are adversaries. But then I thought about it some more. Victor seems to like Skye, even thought he thinks she's a fool to have married Adam. Could Skye and Victor possibly be a future hookup? Call me crazy, but after the Nikki thing falls apart, Victor will be back on the prowl.

Here are some letters from the mailbox -- keep 'em coming, fans!

I totally agree with your commentary on every point. I love Kevin and was appalled to see him get involved with Jeffrey. I also agree with the poster who said that NuHeather had to go. Every time she comes on my screen I have to remind myself who she is...how could two blond blue eyed parents have a dark eyed, dark haired daughter anyway...talk about terrible casting. And her personality is totally different from Vail Bloom...she just does not fit the role. I love Abby...didn't at first but she's turned out to be a super character...good job. -- K

What are the writers thinking by bringing back Diane Jenkins? I guess they just wanted to give Maura West a new job! Diane's character will add NOTHING to this show! Go in another direction!! Something more interesting... And get that stupid Meggie off! -- Shirley C.

With regard to the lawsuit, it may have been Victor's choices that created this "mess" as you state but Vicki's statement that its not about the money, its about independence is hard to swallow. She wants to be independent with someone else's money. If she really wanted to be independent she would get a job and make her OWN money -- otherwise, yes, it is about the money Vick. -- Ellen

You asked what's up with Kevin...um, leopard..spots, you know. I love Victoria and Billy. They are adorable, while Billy still has his edge in the magazine business. Love it! While I'm still not an Abby fan, what she said to Jack and Victor was excellent! Every time I see Heather, I want to call her Bianca. She was good as Bianca (on All My Children), but as Heather...not so much. -- Summer

Your comments are always welcomed at Soap Central, so stay in touch. Contact us at Soap Central. And keep on reading Two Scoops every week! Best,Allison