One for the money, two for the show

Noah accepted responsibility in court, and his freedom became a slam-dunk -- until he rebounded to a life sentence with the deceitful Marisa. Has Elise's letting Noah off the hook shot her credibility as a judge? Did Jack foul out once he leapt off the runaway train of revenge, also known as Phyllis and Billy? No dribbling allowed, as we march madly through Two Scoops.

Oh yes, March madness descended on us once again, as our beloved characters coped with the trials and tribulations in their lives. And in Noah's case, I mean the word "trial" literally. For traveling outside of the country did our young Mr. Newman in, as he battled facing possible violations for what he had done. Even as he charged that his grandfather was to blame, I'm not sure Noah's drive scored any points with the judge -- and most certainly not with Christine. But enough basketball lingo. Let's come to grips with the real significance of March madness -- that our favorite soap was only on three days this week. Now that's the real travesty!

I guess I can't be too surprised that Noah's defense was "my grandpa made me do it." Gee, it almost sounds like "the devil made me do it," which would actually be quite appropriate in this case. After all, Victor has been compared to Lucifer many, many times. Victor constantly claims that everything he does is for family, when we all know it's all about the money. But Victor does like to put on a good show. It's one for the money and two for the show with Victor -- and in that order. For Victor, the importance of family is all for show, since his loved ones have been pleading with him for years to lose the Abbott vendetta. But if Victor can take Jack or Billy Boy down a notch while raking in a few million bucks, life is grand.

But come on, Noah, did Victor make you go on the run to escape prosecution? Christine was right about that, which made Nick's claim that Newmans are tough and resilient and own up to their mistakes pretty laughable. All of Genoa City would have been proud if the young man had stood up and faced the music, once he realized he was the one who had backed over Billy. The true crime was not that Noah ran over Billy with his car. It was that he covered it up then ran from the consequences of his actions, which was actually an accident, since he had never known Billy was there. Noah took the coward's way out. I had never thought of Victor as a coward before the last couple of weeks, but now I see Noah is more like his grandfather than I thought.

I give Noah credit for showing remorse and for feeling guilty for what he had unintentionally and also intentionally done. The blame he piled onto his grandfather's shoulders rather negated that though. Noah had serious issues with "accountability and culpability," as the judge put it. But then Noah surprised me -- and everyone else -- by admitting, before Judge Moxley could announce her verdict, that he was solely to blame.

I can't believe it. Noah actually accepted the responsibility for his actions. That is so totally shocking, especially coming from a soap character. Why, it's almost unheard of. Maybe there's hope for Noah yet. Ugh, but Marisa's still in the picture -- and now they're engaged. Noah may not realize it yet, but he just sentenced himself to life without parole. However, legally, Noah was free with twelve months probation and 60 hours of community service. I wonder if we will ever get to see him work the community service hours. If Victor were still around, he could pay some thug to do the hours for Noah. I mean, isn't that what Victor does? Do the crime, let someone else do the time?

But even when Noah was piling all the blame onto Victor's broad shoulders, he didn't exactly tell the entire truth. Sure, Victor strongly encouraged him to run for his life, but Marisa was the original culprit, since she talked Noah out of confessing in the first place. Man, Noah sure has blinders on when it comes to her. He is protecting someone who doesn't even deserve it. Maybe it's the gentlemanly thing to do, but she's no lady.

But I know darned well Noah is not covering for Marisa to protect her. It's because he's head over heels in love and is totally bonkers over the sneaky feline. No, feline's too good a word for her. Patty would agree. But our dear Noah Newman is absolutely "jonesing" over the predator. Ahh, predator. That's a more accurate description. Oh, wow, I just learned the term "jonesing" actually derived from a drug addiction in the 60s. I always thought it came from the song "Love Jones" from the Brighter Side of Darkness? Remember that timeless classic from the 70s? Apparently, no one else does either. Do you know how hard it is to find googling it? I guess it wasn't that big of a hit.

So, if Noah has a "Love Jones" over the dishonest Marisa, he will probably be facing a life of lies and deceit. Hey, maybe Noah can cleanse himself with some good old fashioned "Basketball Jones" therapy. I have always loved that song by Cheech and Chong. It's hysterical! Curiosity got the better of me, and I had to check. "Love Jones" got as high as #16 on the Billboard Charts, and "Basketball Jones," which was a humorous take-off of "Love Jones," made it as high as #15. Cheech and Chong's ditty deserved to be placed higher. I still hear it from time to time, but I haven't heard "Love Jones" in ages. If you think about it, "Basketball Jones" should be the ode for March during the time that madness takes over. It would be appropriate.

But I doubt if basketball will be Noah's saving grace. Actually, I'm not sure anything can save Noah now that Marisa has her hooks in him. I would have said claws, but, again, that would be too good for her. I like cats. Marisa will only cause Noah grief and heartache in the long run, so he had better enjoy his romps in the hay with her while he can. Of course, Luca could make things tough for them, since he is still married to her. But what's Luca's angle, anyway? Do the writers even know?

Luca seems to sway with the wind. First, he teamed up with Adam to get revenge on his father. Then, he strong-armed his way into Newman Enterprises to prove he could be a valued employee. Luca's next strategy was to try to get Natalie to go into a partnership with him with her PassKey project. Then, "the peacock" tried to team up with Victor to keep N.E. safe and sound from Victoria's clutches and from her leadership. It was no wonder Victor laughed hysterically. He chuckled almost as loudly as he did when Victoria asked for her father's assistance to call N.E.'s "nervous Nellies" executives to calm them. Victoria had some nerve. She pleaded for Victor's help after she had him tossed in the clink. Gutsy! She's becoming her father's daughter more and more each day.

Back to Luca, I keep asking myself, "Why are Noah and Luca fighting over someone like Marisa, who can only make any man's life miserable?" The funny thing was that Luca already knew that. In fact, as he said, he knew Marisa better than anyone. Noah is definitely living in Dreamland if he thinks his life will be content with Marisa at his side. Marisa is like a busy little bee flitting around from flower to flower. And Noah's scent will wear off in time. How long will it take for Marisa to get bored with Mr. Nice Guy? Not long, I'll bet. On the other side, if Luca is indeed smitten with Summer, it's definitely a step up. Or is it Summer's family name that makes her attractive to him?

What are Nikki and Victor going to do now that Elise has taken all of the power and control out of their hands by releasing the truth of her affair with Victor to the press? I cheered when she made her grand announcement. They would have blackmailed her forever. Maximum Moxley would never have had any peace of mind. But she took away their control over her and got her life back. And the judge did the right thing by giving Noah another chance. After all, Victor's sins should not be visited on his grandson. At least we know Elise's decision was not based on blackmail. I'm sure Victor will dig up some dirt on another judge though. Or could Elise have more skeletons in her closet?

Billy held no hard feelings towards Noah, but he may carry a few for his brother, since Jack refused to let Natalie's PassKey project go forward. Even if Billy and Phyllis were dead set on driving over a cliff, Jack did not want to watch. No amount of begging and pleading on Phyllis' part was going to change Jack's mind either. The fiery and passionate Phyllis admitted that she and Billy had "colored a little outside the lines" with the project. Boy, was that an understatement. Those two splashed buckets of paint on the cavass and smeared it all over, up to the edges and outside the page. When they go, they go big. But could you imagine Phyllis doing anything in a small way? Not me.

And neither could Jack, because he even admitted he absolutely loved Phyllis' fire, as along as she could control the flames. He didn't want to be scorched and burned by some hastily thought-out decisions made by Phyllis and Billy. So, Billy and Phyllis agreed to wait to take charge of Natalie's project until after Victor had his trial and was sentenced to prison time. I am really enjoying Billy and Phyllis' friendship. I think they are good for each other because they are alike. But because they care for each other, one seems to figuratively stand by with a fire extinguisher for the other, in case the blaze gets out of control. They actually offer each other very good advice. Now if either one of them could only take it.

I loved how Sage instantly offered Shawn a place to live without even consulting her husband first. Is she crazy? That's a major decision that would affect their lives and Faith's as well. Sage could have, at least, related that she needed to talk to her husband first before promising the teen the moon, the sun, the stars -- and the room next to Faith's. Nick was right. What would they do once Shawn had the baby? Kick her out? Or would she be there to stay forever and ever and watch Nick and Sage raise her baby? Did Sage think things through? Uhhh...no!

I'll just bet Nick doesn't know that Shawn has an entire year to change her mind about the adoption. And I will go out on a limb and say Sage won't tell her husband this little tidbit either. Even without knowing about that, Nick already feels someone's bound to get hurt -- and he's probably thinking that someone will be his wife. Having Shawn live with them until the baby is born is ludicrous. If they let her stay, Shawn will constantly be around her child and will have the chance to bond with the little one. She's already not sure how she will let her baby go. How will being around the child all the time make signing over custody to Nick and Sage any easier? It won't. Nick's right. Nothing good will come from this arrangement.

Poor Nick! He's gets flack even when he's just trying to do the right thing. Nick was very aware of how painful it would be for Sage if Shawn changed her mind. So, he mentioned Shawn absolutely had the right to keep her baby -- she just needed to make her final decision as soon as possible. But, in true soap fashion, Sage overheard him tell the girl that, so you know he's going to be in the doghouse. She will think of his words as the ultimate betrayal. But, hey, I have an idea: Nick and Sage can adopt both Shawn and her baby. That appeared to be what the teen really desired. Shawn wanted the crazy kind of family, where exes could get along with exes, and all was right with the world. But could Shawn and Sage ever be happy with the two mothers fighting over control of one small infant?

Cane and Lily decided to take the twins on a picnic, which ended up being indoors due to a nasty cold front blowing through. Did they think to check the weather forecast before they made their plans? That's what most people do. But, anyway, the two lovebirds made goo-goo eyes at each other, as Cane offered his belated anniversary gift to Lily. A necklace with two hearts intertwined forever and ever. How romantic! Seriously, Cane and Lily made the decision to reunite. It's about ding-dong time. I mean, someone in Soapland should be happy, right?

It was Leslie to the rescue, riding back to save Noah from doing jail time. Welcome back, Leslie!

No matter how many times the Y&R writers refer to Noah as a superhero, he is far from it. Sorry, that distinction of honor goes to either Dylan or Paul.

Luca had it right when he called young lovers Noah and Marisa so young, so tragic. Okay, that sounds just like Romeo and Juliet. Only this tragedy is that Noah has no idea what -- or who-- is going to bite him. And Luca, being the snake he is, should know better than anyone.

Neil had the perfect first rule for his new foundation with Jack: "You can't always save someone from themselves. They have to want it." Both Neil and Jack have experienced that truth enough for themselves, firsthand.

I will be glad to see Sharon work with Chelsea again. In the real world, today's women can have a loving family and a successful career. Sharon needs to show her independence again and not just stand in Dylan's shadow. After all, it's been a long time since we fabulous females were expected to stay barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.

On the other hand, why am I not surprised that Sage turned down Chelsea's job offer? It's madness, I tell you.

Until next time, please stay tuned.TeddiTeddi

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