Why does Lucy Dacus feel "uncomfortable" going public with Julien Baker? Everything she said in a recent interview

Boygenius band member Lucy Dacus recently went public with her love relationship with bandmate Julien Baker. The confession was made in a March 2025 interview with The Forty-Five covered by Billboard, in which she candidly discussed why she had initially not gone public with the relationship. In Dacus's opinion, the move was not one of hiding, but one of guarding something intensely personal.

Whereas long theorized about by their fans, neither Baker nor Dacus ever officially acknowledged that they were together until today. Dacus admitted to being "soft-launching," but she wasn't quite ready to make it official publicly.

According to Billboard, she stated in an interview with The Forty-Five,

"It was like, ‘OK, feelings are on the table, and we ought not touch them, because our relationship is too important, and I support what you want for your life. Or like, ‘Wow, what a surprise that we’re saying this out loud. But let’s ultimately just say that we matter to each other and move on. That was real. That’s how I felt."

She added,

"In a way, that’s the bit that makes me feel uncomfortable"

Discomfort grounded in perception, rather than shame

As per Billboard and Rolling Stone, Dacus explained that she was not exactly uneasy about shame but rather how the relationship can be perceived. She explained that she was "easily threatened" by the way the public would think or respond to something personal. She was uneasy with the external observations, not the relationship.

According to Rolling Stone, she said,

"It’s been interesting, because I want to protect what is precious in my life, but also to be honest, and make art that’s true. I think maybe a part of it is just trusting that it’s not at risk. Maybe a healthier way to think about it is that [my relationship]’s not actually fragile.”

Dacus cited the rising culture of parasocial relationships, wherein fans bond one-sidedly with celebrities, as one of the main reasons why she did not feel comfortable. As much as she knew that most of the fans are nice, she testified that the relationship is sometimes misinterpreted or invasive, particularly when it comes to relationships.

Friendship as the foundation

Dacus reiterated that her relationship with Baker started as a long-term friendship. They have known each other since about 2016, and their friendship became stronger in the process through collaborative work and personal interaction.

As per Rolling Stone, she explained that the relationship developed organically, and they wanted to uphold trust and understanding in the process. We come to know this when she said,

"To have your minds meet on something, and be, like, ‘Oh, my gosh, you said what I couldn’t say. I love your mind. How are you doing romance without friendship? I can’t imagine. That feels so hollow. It makes me feel ill! Someone that’s not my friend? Are you serious?”

Lucy Dacus's thoughts provide insight into how public figures approach intensely personal choices. Her motivations for being "uncomfortable" to publicly come out regarding Julien Baker are rooted in a need for emotional protection, respect for boundaries, and wanting to safeguard what matters to her.

By having control over when and how she discloses, Dacus asserts control over her relationship with the public on her own terms.

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