“How much tax does it pay?”: Internet humor follows as New Zealand officially recognized a mountain as a legal person

For those who thought 2025 was going to be just another year, New Zealand had other plans for its mountains. In a move that left the internet equal parts confused, amused, and existentially troubled, the country officially recognized Mount Taranaki as a legal person. Yes, you read that right. A mountain is now, in the eyes of the law, a person.

The decision follows a growing legal trend where natural landmarks are granted personhood to protect them from environmental harm. This is the same logic that saw the Whanganui River granted similar rights in 2017. The idea is simple: If corporations can have legal personhood, why not sacred natural sites? Well, the internet had some thoughts on that.

New Zealand's Legal Mountain Status Sparks Internet Frenzy

The announcement was met with a mix of admiration, bewilderment, and an absolute avalanche of internet humor. The internet, after all, never lets an odd legal ruling go unroasted.

One of the most common reactions? The classic, "How much tax does it pay?"

Because if Mount Taranaki is now a person, surely it's time to start contributing to society. Then came the inevitable, "What are its pronouns?"

followed closely by the self-aware "Wait a minute, I can't believe I just read that."

It didn’t stop there. "I am a rock, I am an island" made its expected musical cameo, while others lamented,

"The world has gone bonkers."

Some were excited about the possibilities: "I look forward to it going on holiday, getting married, and having children."

Of course, the internet also had its fair share of doomsayers: "The next person to die there and it’s up for murder."

And true to social media form, a few commenters churned this into an immigration crisis waiting to happen. "Watch other mountains arriving on boats now," one joked,

as another teased a wedding announcement of unusually high stakes with: "Someone will marry it now."

Of course, while jokes of this nature came thick and fast, giving Mount Taranaki its status as a legal person actually marked an important environmental and cultural move: the mountain is a deep part of Māori peoples' heritage, and its being made a person allows it to be better conserved and its indigenous culture considered. It’s a step toward protecting nature in a way that the usual bureaucracy often fails to do.

But let’s be honest, no amount of noble intentions could have stopped the internet from doing what it does best: cracking jokes.

At the end of the day, Mount Taranaki isn’t about to start voting, filing taxes, or swiping right on Tinder. However, its new legal status is an innovative way to ensure environmental protection while honoring Māori beliefs. And if it gives the internet a reason to unleash its full comedic potential, well, that’s just an added bonus.

So, is this a landmark moment for conservation, or just a really slow news day? Maybe a bit of both. But one thing’s for sure: Mount Taranaki has now climbed its way into the internet’s hall of fame.