Fans laugh as Ethel Cain announces new album, ‘Willoughby Tucker, I’ll Always Love You,’ out this August

Ethel Cain has done it again. Well, almost. The alt-pop priestess of Southern Gothic heartbreak just announced her new album, Willoughby Tucker, I’ll Always Love You, and fans are... losing it. But not in the “we are so excited, queen!” way. More in the “August? Are you actually kidding me?” way.

Cain took to social media to break the news, and within minutes, the timeline became a chaotic mix of screaming, crying, and questionable behavior. While she’s known for serving haunting vocals and existential despair, it turns out her biggest crime to date is making people wait four months.

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Ethel Cain’s post sends the internet into a meltdown

The moment Cain’s post went up, the internet did what it does best lost all composure. Her announcement was simple, to the point, and, apparently, personally offensive to some people. Fans immediately flooded the comments with dramatic reactions, and within minutes, the post had turned into a goldmine of internet chaos.

One user bluntly reacted:

“AUGUST??????”

If patience is a virtue, Ethel Cain fans are simply not interested.

Another unimpressed fan added:

“We don’t want it.”

Which is funny, considering these are the same people who will be streaming it at 12:01 AM on release day.

As the comments poured in, so did the fake gagging, the existential despair, and, of course, the baseless accusations.

“Perverts flopped so bad she dropping another album,”

Someone declared, referencing Cain’s last single and inventing a failure that simply doesn’t exist.

Others kept it short but dramatic:

“Screaming and crying.”

And, perhaps the most poetic response of them all:

“Demonic bitch!”

Truly, no one does affectionate name-calling like Ethel Cain stans.

There’s something about musicians dropping albums with an unnecessarily long wait time that sends people into orbit. Ethel Cain fans, in particular, are known for their unhinged yet endearing reactions to anything she does. If she breathes too loud, they’ll probably start a discourse. If she posts an old photo, they’ll act like she announced retirement. But four months? That was the final straw.

To be fair, Cain has a habit of making people feel things. Her music already drags listeners through emotional trenches, so expecting them to endure delayed gratification is, in their minds, simply cruel. And so, they did what they do best spiraled in the most dramatic, funny, and deeply unserious way possible.

Plus, let’s be real: half of the people saying “we don’t want it” will be sobbing into their headphones come August. It’s a tradition at this point.

At the end of the day, the meltdown isn’t real. The screams, the crying, and the dramatic refusals to acknowledge August as a valid month are all just part of the fun. If anything, this level of hysteria only proves one thing: people are desperate for new Ethel Cain music.

So, while fans pretend to protest and fake-gag over the timeline, deep down, they know the truth. They’re counting down the days. And come August, they’ll be right where they always are: front row, emotionally ruined, and pressing replay.