Pete Holmes is a popular comedian, writer, actor, producer and podcaster. He is recognized as one of the most popular stand-up comedians in the world, and his sets are known to explore spirituality and religion. He has also come to be known for his witty, honest, and hilarious quotes that have resonated with many people around the world. Here's taking a look at 21 of his best quotes.
1 - Getting married young
"It just didn't work out. I was 22 when I got married. 22. The same age I was when someone asked me to draw a map of the world and I just straight up forgot South America."
2 - On the afterlife
"I used to just want so badly to have afterlife insured and make sure I was going to heaven."
3 - On joy
"Joy is in learning to say yes to what is and to surrender into flow with what is, even when it's what you don't want."
4 - On love
"When you find love, it should be so powerful that a preposterous idea, such as monogamy, makes sense."
5 - On negative feelings
"I'm not going to have the TV personality and be like, 'There's no bitterness. There's no ugliness.' There's bitterness. There's ugliness. There's pain. There's greed. There's malice, and there's hurt. That's all good stuff for any kind of art. I'm not necessarily feeding that side of myself, and I try not to encourage it too much."
6 - On Adam West's Batman
"The only Batman that doesn't need parodying is Adam West, but everybody else is fair game."
7 - On music concerts
"I don't go to a lot of music concerts, further evidenced by the fact that I refer to them as 'music concerts' like a narc in the parking lot."
8 - On pain and suffering
"We'd all like to increase pleasure and minimize pain, but the truth is, suffering, even collective suffering that we're going through, is often the earmark that some real change is happening."
9 - On therapy and breakups
"It took me $10,000 of therapy to realize you don’t have to hate someone to break up with them."
10 - On coffee
"I’m not a caffeine person, I run on anxiety."
11 - On making space for things
"There’s something beautiful waiting for you as soon as you make space for it."
12 - On drinking alchohol
"The reason adults drink is because we're trying to have fun like kids have naturally."
13 - On good comedy
"Good comedy can be liberating, and if I'm doing my job as a comedian, part of the joy for the audience is getting that release."
14 - On traffic
"Traffic: Sit there. Sit. Occasionally move your foot from the brake and crawl forward, then put it back. That's all you do for hours. It's very calming."
15 - On trumpets
"It’s one of the great mysteries of my life: how do they get all those notes from three buttons?"
16 - On divorce
"I thought divorce was for people that threw plates at each other, and I'd have to be an alcoholic or having affairs. But the truth is, sometimes a very sweet, well-meaning person just doesn't do it for you, and you need to get out of there."
17 - On humiliation
"There's something about taking emotional and career and relationship humiliations, writing them, acting them out again, but then redeeming them in some way."
18 - On comedians
"Comedians really are like a species. That's not to be exclusive. Anyone can kind of become one. You have to pay your dues, though."
19 - On past lives
“Like how people who claim to have had pastlife experiences are always saying they were Cleopatra, or Napoleon, never just some dude named Kyle who smokes menthols and shovels poop at the zoo.”
20 - On depression
“I know it sounds strange, but I look back on my depression fondly. So much anxiety in my life comes from not knowing what to do or how to behave, but everyone knows how to be sad.”
21 - On his own looks
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"The idea of saying 'the handsome Pete Holmes' is preposterous."
These insightful, funny, and witty quotes just go to show how the 45-year-old comedian truly has one of the most intelligent and curious minds in the business. A true gem of comedy.
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