Wishy-washy waffling Willow wins the week: General Hospital Two Scoops for the week of November 4

General Hospital delivered on the soapiness of it all this week, but it doesn't mean we weren't still left with a bad taste in our mouths from two characters who showed their true spots in every way.

Willow: Once a cheater, always a cheater

So, Michael (Chad Duell) thought that if he married the woman who cheated on her first husband with him, she wouldn't cheat on him? That's why this writer nicknamed him Carly's Dumb Son years ago. Cause that is who he is. And Willow (Katelyn MacMullen) is nothing more than the sanctimonious hypocrite she has been since the moment she learned Chase (Josh Swickard) would live when she married him on his alleged deathbed.

Remember when Willow married Chase while lusting after Michael because she wanted him to die happy? Then, when she learned he was cured, she had the most horrified look on her face cause that meant she couldn't have sex with Michael anymore. And it's not like being married to Chase stopped Willow anyway. She still had sex with Michael. Grief sex. During their child's birthday party.

That grief sex was apparently fantastic because she had grief sex again this week with Drew (Cameron Mathison). On a child's playroom floor. This is Willow, folks. The pure and perfect snowflake who neglected to treat her cancer while pregnant and then wondered how it progressed to stage 4 despite her being a medical professional. The world stopped to bring precious Willow some precious bone marrow so she could live with her precious family. And a year later, she is back to being the cheater who will always be a cheater.

Give it to her good, Sasha

At least Sasha (Sofia Mattsson) now has Willow's number. Willow was more upset that her kiss secret was revealed than she was about hurting her husband by kissing his uncle. She had to put the blame somewhere since nothing can ever be her fault, so she blamed Sasha.

And Sasha? Well, she wasn't having it. Sasha correctly pointed out that there would be no secret to spill if Willow hadn't chosen to kiss Drew in the first place — twice. Of course, Sasha just had a drunken one-night stand with Willow's husband, but that only happened because Willow kissed Drew and lied about it for months.

All Willow could do was whine that Michael didn't need to know the truth and be hurt because it would never happen again. All she cared about was saving her marriage. And that is why 10 minutes later, she was naked and on top of Drew on the playroom floor. Can't wait for Sasha to learn about that one.

Ewwww, Drew

And then there is Drew. Once a good man, an honorable man, and a loving husband and father, when played by Billy Miller, he is now a liar, a louse, greedy, manipulative, vindictive, and secretive. Not sure what happened to Drew when Victor Cassadine kept him hostage for two years, but perhaps he killed him and replaced him with an imposter.

The man has been having hate sex with Nina (Cynthia Watros) for months after threatening violence against her when the year began, has been following Willow around since summer, and has paid off Cody (Josh Kelly) to keep his secrets. That's on top of throwing himself on his sword and going to jail to protect Carly (Laura Wright) because his daughter had Sam (Kelly Monaco) and didn't need him around anyway.

Now, Scout (Cosette Abinante) no longer has Sam, and the first thing he thinks of is that he has no idea how to be a father. Perhaps that is because he has neglected to be one for the last three years. And on the night his small daughter learned her mother was dead? He did the nasty with married woman Willow on the floor of his kid's playroom. So, let's stop pretending here. Drew is not a good guy and certainly not the Drew that Sam fell in love with.

Michael, you suck too

Let's not forget that Michael had drunk sex with Sasha after learning his wife only kissed Drew once. Then, after learning she kissed Drew twice, he tried to get the truth out of her. After Willow lied some more, Michael had sex with her so that she could turn around and have sex with Drew later that day. Does it get any more ick than this?

Oh, that's right. Michael witnessed the sex on their baby monitor app and didn't bother telling Willow he knew all about her romp on the floor the hour before. In the words of Chandler Bing: Could these people even be more horrible? Let the chips fall as they may. And may the babies be born in nine months because if all this sex doesn't result in a pregnancy or two, GH is not a soap.

Alexis needs all the hugs

Alexis has repeated this over and over for a week. You aren't supposed to outlive your children, but Alexis did, and her heartbreak is our heartbreak. Alexis went through the motions and emotions this week, and it was a beautiful thing to behold.

Perhaps Alexis's most poignant moment came when she sat with Sonny and told him about her regrets from giving Sam up for adoption when she was just a teenager. She wished she had rebelled against her father and kept her child. Sonny seems to be the person Alexis can open up with the most. We said it last week, and we'll say it again: "Sexis" has as much chemistry as they did more than twenty years ago when Kristina (Kate Mansi) came to be.

Maurice Benard and Nancy Lee Grahn are absolute magic together. Sonny and Alexis have a connection like no other. They understand each other, tolerate each other, and when push comes to shove, they will do anything for each other. So GH, do something for us and make Sexis happen after all these years.

Our darling Dante

"Sante" was the most stable couple on GH, which sometimes made them boring, but oh, the potential they had if they were actually given real conflict. It was obvious how much they loved one another, and Dante's despair is now our despair, much like with Alexis.

He has no idea how he is going to go and you just want to cry with him. Bravo to Dominic Zamprogna for showing us that real men can cry and real men can grieve. Dante is a tough cop who wears his heart on his sleeve, which makes him a real man (unlike Drew, another man Sam once loved).

The jury is out on Lucas and Brad

There's a new Lucas, but we still have the same old Brad. And their chemistry? It's still there. Van Hansis and Parry Shen have already developed a natural rapport, and we want to see what happens there, but we don't know if we can forget why they broke up. Brad stole a baby and passed him off as the infant Lucas and Brad adopted for over a year. He lied and kept a whopper of a secret from his husband for a very long time. Can that be forgiven? Well, not according to loudmouth Carly. She makes the rules — or at least she thinks she does.

Danger alert!

Sasha was kidnapped and had to escape a literal ticking time bomb, all in two episodes. That added some excitement to the week as Jason (Steve Burton) took a break from mourning Sam to run into a building that was about to blow up just save Sasha. We'd ask what the purpose of this story was, but it looks like it was a feel-good arc to show Sasha that her mother really does love her after all. Awww....

Around Port Charles

Whoever realized that breaking up the Lucy and Ethel dynamic duo of Nina and Ava (Maura West) was a bad, bad move deserves our thanks. It made absolutely no sense to end this friendship over Sonny. Since when would Ava want to land Sonny, a man who she's done nothing but tolerate for years since they share a child?

It took years to build a solid friendship between Nina and Ava, two women who once loved Silas Clay (Michael Easton) and gave birth to his daughters. Why waste all that time and effort to have it end over a man neither one was destined to end up with? Now, let the good times roll cause "Nava" is back!

Thank you, Diane (Carolyn Hennesy), for realizing that Robert doesn't love you and never will. Was this another writing epiphany that Robert and Diane just don't work together? It was almost cringe to watch so we're glad that's finally over. Phew!

Is there another couple more boring than Brook Lynn (Amanda Setton) and Chase (Josh Swickard)? That's a rhetorical question as we look forward to the weekend and a good night's sleep.

Catch all-new episodes of General Hospital weekdays on ABC and Hulu.