Son of a Preacher Man?

Cyrus is preaching, Sonny is being cuffed, Brook Lynn is packing, Tracy is gloating, and mayhem is about to be unleashed in Port Charles.

Dear readers, there is a lot of topsy-turvy -Alice-in-Wonderland-y- through-the-rabbit-hole weirdness in Port Charles these days.

For months, Austin and Mason kept discussing their boss as a "she," but as my fellow columnist Liz pointed out in her last GH Two Scoops, we had a gender change, and the boss became a "he."

Austin came to town, ostensibly as the son of Jimmy Lee Holt, and was looking for a cut of the Q fortune. But now I have to question that entire backstory.

In Friday's episode, the juxtaposition of Cyrus preaching to his flock of felons while Sonny had warm scenes with his family was stark. Cyrus' preaching was chilling because our doubts about whether his conversion was authentic faded away when Austin revealed Cyrus to be his boss. Or, perhaps, his daddy. I honestly can't tell. When Austin waxed poetic about what a happy day it was in his household when Cyrus showed up, I had to ask myself, "Why was he showing up, and why was Austin happy to see him?"

Maybe Cyrus is his bio daddy, and Austin is the son of a wannabe preacher man. Or perhaps Cyrus is Mason's dad (which would explain a lot), and Cyrus was just Austin's criminal uncle. Time will tell as the saga unfolds. But since the floor keeps moving beneath us, we can't trust anything we see or hear from episode to episode. Perhaps next week, the writers (whoever they may be at this point) will decide that Austin is Eddie Maine's son. I mean, nothing else makes any sense, so why not?

A new piece of the puzzle has emerged; Cyrus is in cahoots with the prison warden, quietly raising an army behind him to do heaven knows what. Next week's previews showed Cyrus ominously informing Drew that he is no longer under Sonny's protection, since Sonny is seemingly out of the picture.

Did Sonny's arrest come as a shock to you? It did to me. I felt like something was coming but didn't expect it to arrive so soon. Was it Joss? Did she find where Dex stashed the flash drive? Let's face it: there is no way he let Carly destroy the only copy. Did Joss turn in her stepfather because she was pouty about missing a concert? Possibly. But the fallout is going to be monumental. All these years, Sonny has kept the peace in Port Charles. With him out of the way, I predict chaos in the streets.

But all signs are pointing to Cyrus. He wanted Sonny out of the way. He wants Drew for...something. Jeffrey Kober was mesmerizing in his sermon -- but menacing at the same time. I believe in genuine redemption, but this does not appear to be what is happening in Pentonville. Cyrus is still Cyrus, just with a new scam. That leaves me a bit disheartened because after his heart attack, I believed him for a while.

Is Cyrus working with someone on the outside? Maybe Austin's hostage or roommate, Nikolas Cassadine? We don't even know if Nikolas knows he is Nikolas. Or has he been running this scam all along? Seeing Adam Huss sitting there, healthy and upright, was another shock to me. The last time we saw Nikolas, he was hooked up to machines under Mason's creepy gaze.

My husband, who pretends he doesn't watch GH, said, "That's' Nikolas? Where are his tattoos?" I had to explain that it was a new actor, and this actor didn't have tattoos. Then I reminded him we had discussed this topic before regarding Maxie's vanishing heart surgery scar. Scars and tattoos come and go on soaps. Don't get too attached.

When I mentioned Maxie and that she and her three kids were moving into Lulu's old house, he said, "When did Maxie get three kids?" I reminded him that Georgie was her daughter with Spinelli, James was her son with Nathan, and Bailey was her daughter with Peter. Bailey was the one he didn't know about because he skipped the whole Peter August storyline after Liesl had him tied up in some cabin in the woods.

I like the idea of Maxie and the kids moving into Lulu's home because that seems to indicate that Lulu will wake up soon. But which Lulu? Emme Rylan noted that she had not been contacted, so does that mean it's Julie Marie Berman's Lulu coming back or a new one altogether? Maybe I am just wishful thinking, but if Nik is back and Lulu wakes up, Lucky won't be far behind, and Laura can get her family back. P.S. I like the new SORASed Georgie and James. I wonder how old Bailey Lu will be when we finally see her?

With Nikolas back, I can see a scenario where Nikolas and Liz would enter into a marriage of convenience so Liz wouldn't have to testify against Nik for holding Esme captive. She already told the hospital board, but would that be admissible in court? Not if he hires Diane. Liz and Nikolas marrying would open a lot of past storylines. Still, since we have changed Nikolases again, there will be no vintage flashback scenes. Still, I think it could be interesting. Since Finn and Liz are getting to a somewhat stable place, no doubt something will come to shake up their relationship. The writers seem to dislike happy couples. The most stable couple in town now appears to be Michael and Willow, and they have endured a lot this year. But my dear friends, not as much as Sasha.

My beloved readers, there are many things we disagree on, such as which couples we prefer, favorite villains, best weddings, etc. But I think all GH viewers are in universal agreement on this point: We are tired of Sasha Gilmore being the punching bag of the writers. It's not entertaining. It's sick and disturbing. First, we watched Sasha lose her baby on Christmas. This was a heartbreaking and tragic storyline. I know people who have lost their babies. It is genuinely gut-wrenching, and having GH portray that heartbreak was very powerful. Both Johnny Wactor and Sofia Mattson absolutely slayed that storyline. But the hashtag #deadchristmasbaby was trending because having the baby die on Christmas seemed extra cruel. Usually, on soaps, we have happy scenes with eggnog and pianos and people reading Christmas stories in Santa suits. But nope. Not for Sasha.

Next, the writers killed off Sasha's husband Brando by way of "the Hook" killer. If you have a serial killer storyline, you must have victims. But why not Gladys? Brando was tied to Sonny, had a friendship with T.J., and a loving wife, and he was moving into a Jason-esque role on the show. Brando seemed to have a lot more storyline potential in him. But nope, he was killed off, leaving Sasha in the depths of despair.

And the drugs. So many drugs. Pills while Sasha was modeling, drugs from creepy Cyrus, drugs over and over. Then, once she finally got herself clean and was feeling strong and ready to end the guardianship, Gladys allows some psycho doctor to inject Sasha with drugs and make her an addict again? That's' unforgivable. I cannot bear to watch more scenes of Sasha locked in a mental hospital with some creepy doctor holding her down and injecting her with drugs. It's too much, GH writers. We all hate this storyline, and it's making us miserable. Please, for the love of God, stop this. Gladys cannot be fixed. Get rid of her. Dr. Montague is the devil. Let Selina Wu have a crack at him. Someone tell Kevin Collins to get his butt home pronto and save the patients from this horrible man. The Sasha torture must stop.

A friend of mine just wrote a novel about "conditional release" psychiatric hospitals, where they won't release you until all your bills are paid. Still, your bills go up every day you stay there, so you can never get it paid off. Like the "Hotel California." I can guarantee that if Nina pays off Gladys' debts, Dr. Montague will try to squeeze Nina for more money, and now Sonny isn't around to bail her out.

This next season will be fraught with danger for Carly, her family, and Nina because Drew and Sonny are nowhere in sight, and those left behind have no protection from whoever is coming after them. Man, this would be a fantastic time for Jason Morgan to turn up alive, guns blazing.

Across town, Aunt Stella had a beautiful and poignant heart-to-heart talk with Curtis. She understood his challenge but reminded him that FDR could run the country from a wheelchair and that being wheelchair-bound wasn't the end of his life. She finally got through to him, resulting in him going home to his family. Vernee Watson is so excellent in scenes like this. I used to dislike her when she was meddling in Curtis' love life, but she's perfect at GH, working with a client or talking to Curtis like she did this week.

In other hard conversations this week, Liz talked to Finn about his Dad's ALS diagnosis. Finn was thankful that Gregory confided in Liz. Hence, he had someone to talk to. I think this will be another romance weighted down in despair.

I can't say why, but the GH writers seem intent on ruining the relationships we are rooting for. We adore Spencer and Trina (Sprina!), and they stick Spencer with Esme 80% of the time. And everyone is talking about how great "NuEsme" is and how she's a competent employee and an all-around swell mom, which bugs me a little. In real life, if you committed a crime, then fell and hit your head and said you couldn't remember, your crimes wouldn't just go away.

If Esme doesn't remember, why does she look so jealous when Spencer is with Trina? Why did she name the baby Ace? Maybe she recalled at least a little? It's been so long, and I wonder where this is going. Let Laura and Kevin come home, Trina and Spencer get an apartment together, and he can visit his little brother once a week. Mind you, I am an only child, so I don't know what the average number of times is the right amount to visit your little brother once you're an adult. Feel free to school me if once a week isn't enough. I loved the scene with Spencer and Alexis where she urged him to give his father another chance and told him how devoted Nikolas was to Spencer as a child. Nancy Lee Grahn and Nicholas A. Chavez feel like family; they have an easy connection, and I believe them as aunt and nephew.

Next, we love Valentin and Anna (Vanna!), and the GH writers are trying to make us think that Valentin torched Anna's house? If he did, I would be so angry. This is why we can't have nice things. They seem to enjoy destroying something perfectly wonderful. Julexis. Nik and Ava. Friz. Spixie. JaSam. CarSon. But I digress. No use bringing up old wounds. Right now, I am with Charlotte. She needs a home where she can stay and feel safe, and Anna and Valentin should move in with her and give her a safe and solid home and have him not be an arsonist.

Lucy and Marty are adorable, too, but I fear he has shady dealings that will bring down Deception. Lucy is enraged about the alimony he is getting and assumes the money is why he doesn't want to marry her. But I think there is more to that story. How does Tracy factor in? Is Tracy working with someone else? Erica Kane, perhaps? I am anxious to see where this goes. I am happy this latest blunder ended with Chase and BLQ moving in together. I am glad Brook Lynn is finally telling Chase the unvarnished truth instead of hiding things from him.

Meanwhile, her daddy still claims to be Eddie Maine, despite Olivia's best efforts to help him remember who he is and why he was at the pool that night. So, what will happen next is that Eddie will remember, but he won't be able to tell Sonny what Nina did because Sonny will be in prison. Now, let's see if the writers have done their homework and remember how seriously claustrophobic Sonny is and how much he abhors small spaces.

Finally, one more note has been swirling in my brain all week. Are there any storylines being told now that we will talk about 20 years from now? B.J.'s heart transplant, Luke and Laura's wedding, Stone's death from AIDS, Robin contracting HIV, Brenda wearing a wire. Bobbie and Laura fighting over Scotty, Lily exploding in a car bomb, the hostage situation at Metro Court, the train crash with Liz and Lucky, the day Lucky found out Liz and Nik were having an affair, the masquerade ball at Wyndemere -- so many classic GH storylines flashing through my brain. Which storyline from the past week, month, or year will fans still be talking about in 2043? I can't think of one. I can't think of any storyline that will have lasting impact. That makes me sad.

This week, I watched a live stream with Michael Fairman, and a lot of the GH cast of the past were telling stories about Jackie Zeman and honoring her life. I still love soaps, but I miss the glory days of soaps, the location shoots, and the larger-than-life adventures. Are those days gone forever? And if so, why? I'd love to hear your thoughts.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Wiley have nightmares about Grandpa Sonny being dragged out in handcuffs? Will Diane go for a spin with Robert in his new car and muss up her always-perfect hair? (I'm envious) Will Diane overcome Drew's plea deal and get him out of prison in time to save the day? Will Sasha get out of the hospital and leave Cody behind inside? Then, will she have to pretend to be crazy again to get back in and save him?

Will Joss get Employee of the Month at Kelly's? Will sweet Leo keep passing out free hugs to sad Q's? (I hope so. Love, love, love Leo!) Is Cyrus Pikeman? Is Uncle Victor Pikeman? Is Anna's sister Alex Pikeman? Is Pikeman a he or a she? Will they ever decide? Will Brook Lynn mess up Chase's place in one day or two? Why did Nikolas seem so chummy with Austin and call him Doc? Is he our third amnesiac this year, or does he know exactly who he is? Will Dex get all the way away from the crime scene, or are there more Feds at the top of the stairs he's running up?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.Tamilu

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