Under oath

Evil twins, bleeding villains, mixed-up texts, beards that need shaving -- the topsy-turvy town of Port Charles always has surprises in store for us! Let's discuss in Two Scoops.

Dear readers, I don't know about you, but I'm a terrible liar. I just can't do it. If I put my hand on a Bible and swore to tell the truth, there is no way I'd make it through a lie without many obvious tells, probably including crying and whispering under my breath, "I'm lying," like Brick Heck.

I have lied by omission many times -- when I was in college, I used to say to my parents, "I'm going to the Library," which was not a lie because our town had a bar called the Library -- I swear! Hooray for Akron, Ohio! Thus, when I said I was going to the Library, I wasn't actually lying, just leaving out a few details -- like that my old pals Jack Daniels and Jose Cuervo and their cousin Ouzo would be there.

Griffin can tell lies by omission, too, but now that he's under oath, and Scott Baldwin is in his face, asking him point-blank whether or not he slept with Kiki, I predict he's going to crack like an egg. And the thing is, I want him to crack. I want him to stay good. I don't want him to get good at lying. I need his heart to be pure. It's so rare on this earth; let me see it reflected, just a little, somewhere.

Ava is, of course, urging Scott to ask him, because Fumble Fingers Franco accidentally texted the truth that her daughter had slept with Griffin. She did not buy his follow-up "JK."

But readers, seriously, how enraged can Ava be? She did, in fact, sleep with Morgan, while he was involved with Kiki, on multiple occasions. She even invented twin cousin Denise DeMuccio and seduced Morgan.

Kiki's little one-night stand with Griffin pales in comparison, though I doubt Ava will see it that way. Ava loves Griffin, and this will break her heart; however, I think she will ultimately forgive him. Unless, of course, Griffin has feelings for Kiki -- do you think that's possible?

I think it is, but they would be pretty boring to watch together, since they are both two nice, normal people, which is always the death of soap couples. At least one person in the coupling has to be damaged in some way. Saintly Lila married scoundrel Edward. Angelic Laura fell for rapist, gambler, mob-friendly Luke. Kind nurse Liz engaged to reformed serial killer sans brain tumor Franco. Former priest Griffin obviously goes with the "trying hard to reform" murdering mob gal Ava.

My one concern is that this revelation of sex will get Dr. Bensch off the hook. In truth, it should not matter at all. If Kiki slept with every doctor at GH and said "No" to Bensch, he's still guilty of sexual harassment. But all the ladies in the house know that's not generally what happens, is it? One thing I know is this: if Bensch doesn't go down in court, Franco will make his life a living hell.

I hate to lose James DePaiva, though, so can Dr. Bensch get fired and then bring him back as Max Holden, since the ABC/Prospect Park feud is over?

This is an important story, and I hope Kiki and Griffin's indiscretion doesn't derail it.

If Bensch winds up in jail, maybe he will run into the new, new shoplifting Cameron. A couple of weeks ago, we had a SORASed Cameron played by Cade McWatt, a shy, awkward teen doing the whole Cyrano thing with Oscar to text Joss, but this week, we have a much more confident, tall blond bad boy Cameron played by William Lipton.

What happened? No idea, but I really like him! He's going to be trouble for Joss and Oscar. But Joss is Carly's daughter, so no doubt she will drift toward the bad boy.

It's hard to imagine Zander Smith and Liz Webber's son growing into a tall blond kid, but he's so engaging that I really don't care and am willing to suspend my disbelief.

I keep thinking about Ferncliff, because I would swear I saw Ryan Chamberlain (Collins), who supposedly died in the mid 90s. Did you watch back then? If you did, you know that Ryan is a total psycho! And, of course, as has been in the past, I have no idea if the Kevin on the outside of the walls is the real Kevin, or if Ryan is out and about in town and our beloved Doc is the one in a straitjacket.

With Genie Francis coming back, what if she is coming back to accidentally being the fake wife of a maniac? Yikes. If it is Ryan on the outside, that explains the creepy "wanting to examine Faison's brain" experiments and Dr. Collins suddenly doing extra shifts at Ferncliff. I'm not sure what is happening, but I am excited to see it unfold. Explosions don't ever really kill people in Port Charles, do they?

My favorite scene last week was Joss punching Nelle, and one of my favorite scenes this week was Carly, dressed to the nines, taunting Nelle about losing while Nelle kicked and hissed like a feral cat with gooey stage blood all over her face. When I was in a repertory theater company in the 80s we made our blood out of Karo syrup and red food coloring. I'm sure there are better formulas in this newfangled age, but back then, I loved mixing up a batch of blood and glopping it on. Wouldn't the PCPD have washed her face off when they arrested her? No matter, it added to the fun of the scenes.

Is this the end? No. As Nelle's portrayer, Chloe Lanier, pointed out on Twitter -- "if Nelle's not dead, she's not done."

Since Brad and Lucas are raising baby Jonah as Baby Wiley, Nelle can come back at any time and blow up everyone's life, and I hope she does. Watching Michael hold the baby he believes is his cousin but is really his son was heart-wrenching. Michael has lost so much over the years; I want him to be happy. Now that Nelle is gone, maybe Michael can have his second date with Francesca. Or, who knows, maybe Sabrina is still secretly alive, too, like many other presumably dead GH characters.

Robert was trying to make sure Finn and Anna didn't die by chipping Finn with a dog chip, but Anna immediately cut Finn's wrist open and yanked it out. Oh, those crazy spies!

What are your theories on who is holding them and what they want with Finn? Who is the mystery patient they are treating? Since they are giving Anna blood transfusions for her disease, I kind of lean toward Faison, since he loves Anna even though she has tried to kill him multiple times. But he can't be alive, right?

I hope so, for Peter's sake. Peter is free from jail time, and I hope his first act as a free man is to shave that scraggly beard off his face.

Robert said the WSB owns him, so perhaps he will have to go with Robert to save his mama and Finn. But the previews for next week say that Robert is going to ask Jason for help. Wouldn't it be great if Jason moved from mob hit man to legitimate spy? Steve Burton would make a dashing James Bond. Just saying.

We are coming up on November sweeps, so the action will continue to build over the next couple months to suck us all in for the big boom. So many plots hanging in the air -- some we have been waiting for for years, like Jason and Sam's reunion and Drew getting his real identity back.

I am trying to figure out what Margaux's interest is in Jason and Drew. Did she know Drew in his former life? Is she really so ambitious that she wants to use Jason to take down Sonny and make a name for herself? Which brother is she going to sleep with/fall for? Maybe both.

She has the flash drive of Drew's memories and a giant box of file folders of Jason's crimes, and I feel like the chick has no personal life if that's what she's spending her free time on. Get a pet, Margaux. Join a club. Walk away from the flash drive. (Of course, if I had that flash drive, I'd be opening all the files on it, too, because I'm a curious nerd.) Will she deny Drew his life and memories so she can use him to make a case against his twin brother? It's starting to seem that way.

I've been heartbroken watching the storyline with Mike's Alzheimer's disease. It's really one of the cruelest diseases. I watched my mom die of breast cancer a few years ago, and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do, but up until the minute she stopped breathing, she still knew who I was and that I was there, and we were talking. Sonny knows that next week, Mike may not even recognize him, and Mike himself sees the signs of decline. I'm going to hate the day the story ends and they ship Mike off to a facility. I pray the day never comes and that Sonny just hires a kind nurse like Felix to take care of Mike and puts up baby locks to keep him from escaping.

Max Gail and Maurice Benard (and all others involved) are doing a remarkable job telling this story. There are an estimated 5.7 million people in the U.S. with Alzheimer's disease (according to Google), so I am confident that this storyline resonates with many GH viewers because it impacts someone they know and love.

Thank you, GH, for telling this story. But please keep the mob part to a minimum and don't dilute the real story.

Welcome back, Leslie Charleson -- great to have the real Monica back on canvas (although the substitute did fine work, she was not our Monica). She arrived back just in time to see her emotionally adopted son Drew make a donation in the name of baby Jonah. Can he get a refund when it's discovered that Jonah is alive and well?

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Julian sneak into any more nurseries and hide baby blankets like a Robin Hood for cold babies? Will Ava be leery of Griffin's first declaration of love coming right before he confesses to sleeping with her daughter? Will Mary Pat turn out to be an accomplice of psycho Ryan Chamberlain? Will Nina get back together with Valentin to spite her mother, Madeline, when she gets back to town?

Will Peter break his razor, trying to shave that fur off his face? Will the newly recast Jordan have mad chemistry with Curtis? Will shoplifting Cameron steal something for Oscar to try to lure him into the bad kid club? Will Spinelli dump stupid Ellie and come back to Port Charles full-time so Maxie can have both her kids in the same town?

With all those questions there are two things that I know, dear readers. The first is that I was so excited about GH that last week I accidentally submitted a column when it was Liz's week. But you can read my column from last week here. And I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.Tamilu

What are your thoughts on General Hospital? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- so drop your comments in the Comments section below, tweet about it on Twitter, share it on Facebook, or chat about it on our Message Boards.