The wicked witch is dead -- and other lies

Alexis did the happy dance when Nikolas told her about Helena's passing, but was it premature? Lies, lies, everyone's telling lies, and karma is poised to strike. Our columnist takes a look at what might happen once close-held secrets are revealed.

Hands down, the funniest scene this week was Alexis' reaction to being told that the grand ole dame -- the evilest of evil stepmothers in the history of evil stepmothers -- Helena Cassadine is at last finally dead. I cracked up when Alexis began to dance the jig and sing "the wicked witch is dead" because it was exactly how I had always envisioned that moment playing out.

I can't help but wonder how many takes were needed before Tyler Christopher managed to pull it together enough to keep a straight face as Nancy Lee Grahn twirled around the room, singing. I've watched that scene a few times and it just gets funnier each time.

I love how everyone, including Alexis, questioned if Helena was truly dead. Only on a soap opera would that be a serious question. Case in point: Carlos, but we'll get to that in a bit.

I'm in the camp that doesn't trust Nikolas' word on the matter about Helena's demise. It seemed much too easy and convenient, so my gut tells me that Nikolas and Helena conspired to orchestrate this elaborate ruse. I have no idea why, but I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if we see Helena again.

Until I see someone other than a Cassadine plunge a stake through Helena's black little heart and her body burst into flames, she will never be dead.

I've repeatedly asked myself what Nikolas stands to gain by keeping Liz's lie going, and I honestly can't think of anything except that he's doing it out of love. This stopped being about ELQ when the truth about Jason's identity was revealed at the church weeks ago, because at that point, Nikolas knew that Jason would eventually take steps to reclaim his life and those shares of ELQ that would unseat Nikolas as CEO.

Hayden seems more of a convenient distraction rather than a serious romantic interest -- someone to keep Nikolas busy until Liz is finally free. And I do believe that Nikolas always knew that Liz would lose Jason. Liz might be quick to lie, but she's also always tortured by the guilt, and Nikolas knows that about her.

Ironically, Liz's confession will be the only way for Jason to accept the truth. Jason is in love with Liz and will continue to give her the benefit of the doubt, so he needs to hear the truth from her lips. Nothing Sam could say or do would make Jason believe Sam over Liz, especially since there isn't any tangible proof that Liz knew who Jason was before Carly revealed the truth to the world.

I think Alexis hit the nail on the head when she asked if Sam wanted to expose the truth to punish Liz because Jason fell in love with Liz not Sam. I respect Sam for admitting that she wished she could answer no. It was honest and, frankly, exactly how I would feel if I were in Sam's shoes. The problem is, Sam is wrong about the timing. Liz only learned the truth at the Nurses Ball after Liz was already in love with Jason and Sam had moved on with Patrick.

It's pretty clear after this week that Jason is on the verge of learning the truth about what Liz knew and when. I have no doubt that the betrayal will slice deep, but will it be enough to change his feelings for Liz? I don't know, but I had the distinct impression that the writers laid the groundwork for the possibility of forgiveness when Jason admitted that he regretted finding out the truth about his identity because it hadn't worked out as he had anticipated.

I feel bad for Sam because Jason is the love of her life, and knowing that her husband is alive but doesn't remember anything about their love or life together has to be tearing her apart. Patrick was right when he suggested that as much as Sam loved him, it didn't compare to what she felt for Jason. That's why I don't blame Sam for marching over to Liz's house to confront Liz. Sam's frustrated and angry, and she sees Liz as the only obstacle standing between Jason and his old life.

Sam has every right to want to be the one to help Jason reconcile his past with his present and find a happy medium. I would feel the same way if my husband had lost his memory. Plus, Sam knows in her heart of hearts that the Jason she knew would want her to fight for him.

Sadly for Sam, Jason is forever altered. I don't think even the return of his memories will have the impact that Sam hopes for because Jason essentially started with a clean slate when he woke up from his coma. He was horrified and disgusted by the stories he heard about Jason Morgan. Yes, Jason has been drawn to violence like Carly said, but it's not intentional. He was Helena's puppet in the beginning, and his recent brush with gangsters was a result of him accidently stumbling across two people -- one a teenager -- who needed rescuing.

Time will tell what happens, but despite all the challenges that Sam and Jason might face in the months ahead, I do believe that they will find their way back to each other. As much as Liz loves Jason, she doesn't deserve him, and she needs to pay for her transgressions. It wouldn't be right for her to have a happily ever after ending with Jason, even if she believes she had valid reasons to lie. What she did was selfish, and it showed a lack of trust in the love that she shared with Jason.

I'd rather Liz earn redemption by saving the dark prince from himself because I'm really tired of Nikolas being the bad guy. If anyone can turn him around, it's Liz.

Moving on, this week, Lulu raced over to the loft and found her soon-to-be ex-husband had hooked up with her cousin -- again.

The ink hadn't even dried on the separation papers before Dante was knocking boots with Valerie, who continued to show a complete lack of respect for boundaries by dropping by unannounced at Dante's loft on Thanksgiving. Never mind that Dante has family in town to celebrate the holidays with or that Lulu and Dante might have been inspired by the holiday to spend some time together for the sake of their son. Valerie didn't consider any of that as she fixed up a plate of food and hot-footed it over to the loft then plopped herself down on the sofa to watch her all-time favorite football team play a rival team that Dante despised above all others.

By the way, in real life, the Buffalo Bills lost to the New England Patriots 13-20. On Monday night.

Don't get me wrong, I'm far angrier at Dante than I am at Valerie because Dante is the one who made promises to Lulu. However, Valerie was no innocent lamb when she showed up on Dante's doorstep to deliver a plate of Thanksgiving food.

My jaw dropped when Dante actually had the audacity to ask Lulu how long she had expected him to wait for her to come around. Not only was he the one who had betrayed Lulu by sleeping with her cousin -- twice -- but he was also the one who told Lulu that their marriage was over if she couldn't get over herself and find a way to trust him, less than a month after Lulu had learned about her husband's infidelity with her cousin in Dante and Lulu's marital bed.

Take note, Valerie -- that is your future if you hitch your wagon to Dante.

I honestly couldn't blame Lulu for trying to lash out by threatening to file an official complaint with Jordan about Dante and Valerie's fraternization, but I'm happy that Maxie showed up to talk Lulu down from the ledge because, as mad as Lulu is, I would rather she not cost that philandering cad and his rebound fling their jobs.

I like Maxie's idea much better. Hurt Dante where it counts, provided that Rocco isn't used as a pawn. Like jobs, kids should always be off-limits.

I'm confident that Maxie and Lulu won't stoop that low, so I'm eager to see what Thelma and Louise cook up. I don't feel sorry for Dante or Valerie because both are behaving horribly. I can't believe that Valerie had the nerve to insert herself in Lulu and Dante's discussion about their marriage and to suggest that Lulu was to blame for losing Dante. Since when is the adulterer the victim?

As for that business with the separation papers, I would like to point out that simply signing them means nothing. You have to file them with the court before the separation is legal. I've known several couples who changed their minds after filing for separation and didn't go through with the divorce.

Maxie has been a lot of fun to watch these days, not just because of her sexy hot relationship with Nathan, but also because she seems genuinely happy and is being incredibly sweet to Nina by guiding Nina to turn Crimson around. I also enjoyed Maxie calling Dillon out for trying to run away from his problems.

I can't stress this enough -- the only person responsible for Dante and Lulu's marital woes is Dante because he was the one who cheated on his wife.

The biggest disappointment for me this week was finding out that Carlos is indeed the father of Sabrina's baby. I'm not sure what the writers were thinking by resurrecting Carlos and then making him the father. Not only is Carlos a wanted criminal, but he's a borderline stalker and very creepy. I wouldn't wish that kind of father on any child -- real or imagined.

I was rooting for Michael to be the baby's father because I love the idea of the Quartermaine family expanding, and I really do like Michael and Sabrina together. They had a sweet romance that was built on a solid foundation of friendship, honesty, and trust. It's disappointing enough to learn that Sabrina slept with Carlos, but now I'm disgusted that he's the baby daddy. I realize that Teresa Castillo will be going on maternity leave soon, but couldn't they have simply had her convalescing and bonding with her baby in the background while Michael focused on rebuilding ELQ?

I hate that a perfectly good romance was tainted with yet another "who's the daddy" lie.

Did Andre actually follow the HIPAA laws in not discussing Morgan's diagnosis with Carly? Sort of. He didn't tell her that Morgan had bipolar disorder, but he did offer a lot of advice to Michael and Carly that all but confirmed the diagnosis. Still, kudos for a doctor remembering that there are laws restricting doctors from openly discussing a patient's business.

Too bad it slipped Andre's mind when he tried to blackmail Anna into attending therapy sessions by threatening to go to the police with what she had told him about Carlos. I really like Andre and see interesting chemistry between him and Anna, so I would prefer that she not continue her sessions with him.

Plus, I kind of have to agree with Anna that proving that Carlos is alive will go a long way in clearing her conscience. Yes, she shot him four times, but that will be hard to prove with Kyle dead and no one around to corroborate Carlos' story. In the end, it will boil down to a criminal's word against that of an ex-spy and police commissioner.

Also newly arrived in town is Shawn's friend Curtis who agreed to help Hayden find her shooter and clear Shawn's name. I can't help but wonder if Shawn knew that Jordan and Curtis had history. More importantly, I'm eager to know what that history is. Does Jordan know Curtis from her days of undercover work, or is there another connection? Judging by how quickly Jordan darted away when she spotted Curtis in Kelly's, I'd say whatever their story is, it's not good.

I love Nina and Maxie's new friendship and dynamics, but shouldn't a fashion magazine have more people bustling about besides the editor-in-chief and her assistant?

Did Hayden really think she looked inconspicuous wearing a floppy hat on the Haunted Star when she met Curtis? If so, she failed miserably because she looked ridiculous and stuck out like a sore thumb.

I love how Mac keeps an eye on his friends -- he covertly follows them around town.

Why didn't Anna's number show up as "Anna" when she called Paul? I would think that he'd have her number added to his contact list, since she works for him.

Did Kyle pay his rent months in advance? Kyle's been dead for quite some time, so I'm not sure why the landlord hasn't taken steps to clear out the apartment, especially if there is a rodent problem going on in there.

Alexis wisely questions just how dead Helena actually is Alexis

: "You had better not be teasing me. Is she dead or is she dead?"Nikolas: "I buried her myself in the family plot on the north side of the island" [Chuckling] "You know?"Alexis: "Thank you, God! Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you! She's dead! She's dead! The witch is dead! The wicked witch is dead! Oh, I'm so happy! I never thought this day would come."

Nina learns that the price of beauty is painfulNina: "Um, yeah. I mean, I don't feel any different, except these shoes are pinching my feet."[Maxie and fashion stylist both giggle]Maxie: "Don't worry. Your feet will go numb soon."

Even Maxie can appreciate Julian's appeal when grumbling about him to NinaMaxie: "Oh, my God. You were so good! I cannot believe you stood up to that chiseled cheapster! I am so proud of you."

Take care and happy viewing,Liz Masters

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