It's all blood under the bridge

A.J. was laid to rest, Sonny turned to Ava for comfort, and a warning led to a car accident that resulted in the premature birth of Patrick and Sabrina's son. Death, betrayal, and mind games; it was just an average week in the life and times of the people of Port Charles.

I feel sorry for Carlos. Big, bad Carlos turned out to be quite a gullible idiot who probably should have chosen another career path because he isn't really cut out to be a mobster. The poor guy was genuinely surprised that Ava had turned on him and that his alliance with her was as fragile as a snowflake on a hot summer day.

Ava is only out for Ava. She cares about people, but she only loves Ava. Kiki and Julian know that, so you would think that Carlos would too. After all, Carlos has presumably been working with Ava for years, so surely he's seen her ruthless deadly side on several occasions, right? I find it hard to believe that Carlos hasn't because Ava is always quick to point out that she and Julian are equal partners in the mob organization.

Sadly, Carlos put his trust and faith in Ava, so now he's paying the price by sitting in jail and looking at a possible murder charge while the woman he loves, Sabrina, may or may not have been the target of Ava's ominous threat to keep Carlos quiet and not spill all of Ava's secrets, especially the one about murdering Connie in cold blood.

A smart mobster would have walked right out of the Floating Rib that fateful night that Ava confessed all and would have snatched up Sabrina, taken the first plane out of the country, and then started a new life under a new identity. You should always have an exit plan, but Carlos didn't have one, and Sabrina and her baby might be paying the price for his folly.

By the way, the scene of Carlos in the squad room, when he was on the phone, threatening to kill Ava, and then slammed the phone down, made me nostalgic. I miss the supreme satisfaction of slamming a phone down when I'm furious with the person on the other end of the call. It's just not the same to angrily press an end button.

While Carlos was in the squad room, on the phone, vowing to kill Ava with his bare hands if anything happened to Sabrina and the baby, Franco was filling Carly in about Ava ordering a hit on A.J. Carly was thrilled that she was right; Ava had been hiding something. I haven't forgiven Carly yet for assuring Sonny that he was the better choice as father for Michael, but I am pleased she's the only one to concede that A.J. would never have given up his trump card of not being a mobster like Sonny by aligning with Julian, even if it was to take down Sonny.

I'm not sure who was responsible for Patrick, Sabrina, and Emma's car crash because we saw both Ava and Luke contact mystery henchmen -- possibly the same person from the Jerome organization -- and then put pending hits on Sabrina and Emma. Later, when Ava realized that Franco might be making friends with Carlos in jail to glean information about Ava, she quickly placed another phone call to an unknown person. Elsewhere in the mansion, Luke reached out to his mystery enforcer because Luke had overheard Nikolas mention to Elizabeth that Spencer's desire to rat Luke out was still going strong. Was Ava or Luke behind the crash, or was it just a random accident?

It's a soap opera, so random seems highly unlikely. Plus, Detective Nathan West is on the case and quickly determined that the other car had swerved into Patrick's lane to force Patrick off of the road and had then sped away. To complicate matters, it appears that Nathan's newfound sister, Britt, might be the prime suspect because Britt had the unfortunate luck to arrive at the scene of the accident just a few minutes after the crash.

However, Britt was presented with a golden opportunity to do some genuine redeeming by delivering and hopefully saving Patrick and Sabrina's premature baby. For the record, I don't think that Britt had anything to do with the accident, but I can completely understand why everyone would have suspicions because when you lie the way that Britt has, you don't garner trust. Britt did some petty despicable things that hurt a lot of people, so it's going to take a long time and tremendous effort on Britt's part to get people to see her in a different light. Until then, she'll have to live with the consequences, which includes a heavy amount of suspicion about her motives and actions.

I was a little surprised that Nathan didn't tell Britt about their family connection because I'm admittedly looking forward to the scene. I have a feeling that Britt's reaction is going to be hilarious when it sinks in how close she came to hooking up with her own brother. I don't like Britt, but Kelly has wonderful comedic timing.

Dear readers, I confess that I have never really been a big fan of Luke's. There were times that I enjoyed his antics, but he just wasn't one of my favorites. I remember watching the scenes of what transpired at the campus disco between Luke and Laura way back when, and I was horrified. Even though I was a kid, I knew enough to recognize that what Luke had done was wrong. I will always view it as rape, and that is why it's always tainted my view of Luke.

I respect that others feel different about what went down between Luke and Laura at the disco and that there are many who love the character of Luke, but in the end, both Luke and Laura have repeatedly acknowledged that Luke raped Laura. I concede, though, that Ned was right; it was a different era. Plus, Laura ultimately forgave Luke and went on to marry him and have two children with him.

However, it's because of Luke's past that I find his recent shenanigans downright disgusting. I can't help it. There are women in my personal life who have been raped, and I see the scars that they carry on their very souls, so watching someone behave the way that Luke has been, especially toward Kiki, has a visceral effect on me. I honestly can't say with any real conviction that this version of Luke won't eventually rape Kiki -- or another woman who catches his eye.

Lately, I've had a particular loathing of the character because Luke makes my skin crawl. I feel dirty just watching him, so this is a plea to Ron Carlivati to please explain what's really going on with Luke sooner rather than later. As it stands now, it's extremely disturbing, not entertaining, to watch Luke leer at women and make increasingly aggressive advances towards them.

I've received loads of emails speculating that Luke is actually Anthony Zacchara, Bill Eckert, or even Jerry Jacks in disguise, but I have a feeling that it's going to be far more complex than that. I'm fairly confident that it's not Anthony because it would be quite difficult to resurrect him from the dead even if he had been taken to the cryogenic clinic in Scarsdale after the police discovered his body. If I remember correctly, Heather carted Anthony's dead body around for quite a bit, so I doubt that even a vampire's kiss could bring Antony back.

I also doubt that it's Jerry Jacks because I can't see him being interested in Kiki. Ava, yes, but not Kiki. He prefers his women a little older than fresh out of high school. As for Bill Eckert, that would be too obvious.

My gut tells me that the person who is currently passing himself off as Luke is, in reality, a Soleito, possibly Gino Soleito's son. Gino Soleito's son would have an axe to grind with Tracy because she made off with his father's fortune when Gino died. Plus, Gino's son is a mobster like his father, so I can see Gino's son being interested in taking over Sonny's territory. Sonny once said that the plot against him felt personal, so perhaps Gino's son paid his half-brother, Johnny, a visit in Pentonville, and the brothers bonded.

Whatever the case may be, I agree with the majority of the readers who wrote in to say that the man that we are currently seeing is not the real Luke. The real Luke is either still at Miscavige or somewhere else, but he is not running around Port Charles, setting up a drug trade and plotting to launder the money through ELQ.

As Ava and Luke were plotting against Sabrina and Emma, A.J. was being laid to rest. Is it me, or did it seem that A.J.'s funeral was all about Sonny? Where were the flashbacks of A.J.'s early life or even the past eighteen months? We basically had Monica have a completely justified meltdown about Sonny being at the funeral, and then she quickly capitulated to accommodate Michael by unwittingly allowing her son's murderer to stay. That was followed by a scene of everyone standing around A.J.'s casket while the song "Pale Bird," by Chic Gamine, played, which seemed more fitting for Sonny than for A.J.

I love Ron's writing, but I was seriously disappointed by A.J.'s send-off because A.J. was a legacy character of a core family that has lost way too many members in recent years.

After A.J.'s brief funeral, Sonny kept the betrayal hits rolling by making time with Morgan's woman, Ava, in the mausoleum, practically on top of A.J.'s coffin. It was creepy and morbid and wrong on every single level. I get that Sonny is in self-destruct mode, but dude, at least go to the boathouse, where everyone else hooks up.

Of course, no sooner was the illicit tryst over then the regrets and excuses began. Both Ava and Sonny insisted that they were in love with their significant others, but I call malarkey on that one. If you are truly in love with someone, you don't cheat. You're not even tempted.

Even though I was revolted by Sonny and Ava's conduct, I admit that I laughed when Morgan called out for Ava, and he heard her and Sonny loudly whispering as they scrambled to right their clothes and find her purse in the crypt. Morgan scored major points with me when he entered that mausoleum, took in the scene, saw the guilty expressions on Sonny and Ava's faces, and then realized that Sonny and Ava had just had sex.

It's become clear to me that easing up on the sex marathons has elevated Morgan's IQ points and sense of awareness exponentially.

Sonny totally deserved it when Morgan threw Jax into Sonny's face as Morgan listed some of the ways that Sonny has screwed Morgan over during the years. Morgan was absolutely right; Sonny and Ava do deserve each other, and I have thought so from the beginning, but alas, it doesn't appear that a relationship will be in the stars for them because of Ava murdering Connie and nearly taking Olivia out with a sniper gun.

I'm one of the viewers who does the happy dance whenever A.J. makes an appearance to haunt Sonny. As an A.J. fan, I spent years watching Sonny and Carly flat-out lie and make up excuses to justify keeping A.J. from his son, but in the end, it was all for naught because despite all of Sonny and Carly's efforts, Michael got to know A.J. and grew to love him.

It was downright heartwrenching to listen to Michael tell Sonny that as much as Michael had loved A.J., A.J. could never take Sonny's place in Michael's heart because Sonny was the best father that Michael could have had. Oh, how Michael will regret those words. It was a pretty ridiculous thing to say in the first place, even if Sonny hadn't murdered A.J. because, you know, getting your kid shot in the head, having armed thugs loitering around the home, receiving brightly wrapped packages containing bombs, and having daddy shoot mommy in the head moments after giving birth to your little brother are good things. (Heavy sarcasm)

I realize that Michael saying those things was partly a plot point to make Sonny feel worse, but it still stuck in my craw because, despite loving the children, Sonny was a lousy father who always endangered them. Even Carly thought so, which is why she forced Sonny to sign over his rights to both Michael and Morgan after Michael was shot and then later shipped Morgan off to military school under a false name, so Sonny couldn't find him.

Sonny was and is a man who puts his own selfish needs ahead of everyone else. That's the bottom line. When my kids were born, my husband and I made changes to our lives because the children came first. That's what good parents do. Sonny just added bodyguards.

Meanwhile, it's raining men around Liz, and I couldn't be happier for my girl. Ric is jealous because Liz decided to accept Nikolas' offer for Liz to recuperate at Wyndemere. I don't blame Ric for being worried about her hanging out with Prince Nikolas because it's hard to outdo a castle, even a Gothic one like Wyndemere on Spook Island -- I mean Spoon Island -- especially when the object of your affection loves said prince.

I'm still on the fence about whether Ric has truly changed or not, but I am enjoying seeing him try to woo Liz while Nik tries to hide his jealousy and hungry gaze whenever she's not looking. I hope Liz doesn't rush to pick one over the other because it's time for her to have a little fun.

I also like the fact that while Liz is at Wyndemere, so is Cam, which is driving his cousin, Spencer, crazy. I've seen some complaints about the fact that the children have a storyline, but it doesn't bother me. All the legacy kids on the show have had storylines growing up through the years, and these children are all legacy children.

Finally, there are Jordan and Levi, our two newest residents, neither of which I like.

Some have suggested that perhaps Jordan worked out a deal with the cops to go undercover to expose the Jerome drug ring, but until that is revealed, I'm going to take what I see and hear at face value, and what I see and hear right now is a manipulative woman who wants to make a quick buck and pick up where she left off before she went away to jail and lied to her son.

I'm firmly Team Julexis, so I also don't want Jordan making eyes at Julian or thinking that she can sleep her way to the top by seducing the boss.

There's also something very off with Levi because he seemed to work pretty hard to get Maxie to evict Nathan from the apartment. Someone who is all about peace and love would try to help Nathan and offer understanding and compassion after everything that Nathan has been through, not toss him out into the street because his vibes don't jive. It's Levi who gives off the bad vibes, not Nathan, so I hope that Nathan sticks around and seduces Maxie away from Levi.

Yes, dear readers, I'm finally warming to Nathan now that he's no longer sounding like a broken record.

Finally, if you didn't catch Soap Central Live this week, please treat yourself and click on the link because Sean Kanan was a guest and talked about GH, B&B, and his new book. It was a lot of fun.Things that tickled my fancy

Nikolas reacts to Ric's unexpected visit at WyndemereElizabeth: "Is something wrong?"Ric: "I don't know. You tell me. Well, I stopped by the hospital, only to find that you had been discharged and then went to your house, and no sign of anybody, and then I had to call Audrey, and she told me that you and the boys had moved into Wyndemere."Elizabeth: "I..."Nikolas: "How very Nancy Drew of you. Uh, I still don't understand why that merits a visit."

Ava tries to insist that she was an innocent victim when Sonny shot A.J. Ava: "Well, it's the truth. He was strangling me, and Sonny came in, and he stopped him. If he hadn't, people would be mourning me right now."Carly: "Name five."

Carly taunts Ava about Franco spending time in jail with CarlosAva: "I find it odd that Franco didn't hire a lawyer."Carly: [scoffs] "What's it matter to you?" [gasps] "Oh, right. Carlos. Wouldn't it be funny if they became friends, your henchman and my boyfriend? I mean, after all, they do have you in common. What's the matter, Ava? Do you realize you have smoke coming out of your ears? I wonder what those two jailbirds are talking about right now."

Epiphany channels her inner mother when scolding Felix for snapping at patientsEpiphany: "Now, I also understand that she's not the only patient that you snapped at lately."Felix: "You snap at people all the time."Epiphany: "Well, that's different."Felix: "Why?"Epiphany: "Because I said so."

Until next time, dear readers, take care. Liz Masters

What are your thoughts on General Hospital? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- so drop your comments in the Comments section below, tweet about it on Twitter, share it on Facebook, or chat about it on our Message Boards.