A shot, a flash, and a funeral

How far would you go in the name of love? As the people of Port Charles gather to bid a final farewell to someone dear, a marriage is tested, a friendship is jeopardized, and a loved one is pushed to the brink. Is forgiveness possible, or will lives be irrevocably changed, because of secrets? Find out in this week's Two Scoops.

One of the reasons that I love soaps is because reality is often suspended for the sake of drama. For example, people can stroll into courthouses armed with loaded guns, like Todd Manning and John McBain did this week. A gun can be fired into the air of said courthouse, yet no one on the second floor is shot in the foot, or worse.

When I recently accompanied a friend to juvenile court, the police officers at the door, by the metal detector, all but strip-searched me. I told one of the officers that the last man who had groped me like that had to put a ring on my finger. The officer smiled, and then handed me a mint.

Then there is the curious case of Jason Morgan, who had brain surgery just a few days ago. Jason woke up from the life-saving operation, fully clothed in his standard uniform of a black t-shirt, jeans, and ass-kicker boots, instead of one of those snazzy hospital gowns that allows patients to moon everyone, from unsuspecting visitors to the hospital staff. Stranger yet, Jason had no sign of a shaved head where the actual surgery had taken place, or a Band-Aid where Patrick had accessed Jason's brain. Perhaps Patrick installed a zipper during one of Jason's many brain surgeries. After all, Jason goes in for brain surgery as often as most of us go in for dental checkups and cleanings.

Not too long ago, Epiphany mentioned that there had been some budget cuts at the hospital, hence Epiphany insisted that Carly return the set of scrubs that Carly had pilfered from the supply closet. I can understand not wanting to invest in Bic razors to shave various body parts before surgery, but I do expect a hospital to have Band-Aids on hand for people who have had brain surgery.

Sam's pregnancy is another example of a departure from reality. Last week, Sam was walking around with nary a baby bump in sight, and then suddenly she wakes up from a nap, looking refreshed and six months pregnant, even though only a couple of days had passed in Port Charles. Was she chugging Miracle-Gro, while Jason was sleeping?

Since we are on the subject of Sam, I have to confess that I no longer believe that Sam is acting out of concern for Jason's fragile health, in regards to keeping quiet about Robin's tragic death. Sam lost my support the minute that Monica assured Sam that Dr. Morucci had reviewed all of Jason's charts, tests, and whatnots, and determined that Jason was well enough on the road to recovery to hear the news about Robin.

Sam's excuse, that she would only trust Patrick to clear Jason, was feeble at best. Does this woman not have any compassion for Patrick's situation? To expect Patrick to say it is okay for Jason to know about Robin's horrific death is just downright cruel, because the last thing that Patrick wants to do is see the man whom he believes is responsible for Robin's death.

Wasn't it enough that Patrick saved Jason's life? Why can't Sam leave that poor man alone?

I suspect that the real reason that Sam doesn't want Jason to know about Robin's untimely demise is because she fears that Jason will indulge in a bout of "it's all my fault," take off on his motorcycle, and then pull out his box-of-pain, where he keeps all of those special mementos of his past losses and heartbreaks. I don't want to see Jason's box-of-pain either, but this is about trust and respect. Sam is not being a trustworthy wife, nor is she showing her husband much respect by keeping something this important from him.

Jason has every right to know about Robin. However, he should hear it from his wife, not Carly. I'm a bit creeped out by Carly's eagerness to tell Jason about Robin. What normal person wants to be the bearer of such awful news? And newsflash, Carly -- a spouse trumps a friend. I know that Carly has a hard time with that concept, which is why all of her marriages have failed, but the bottom line is that it's Sam's place to tell Jason, not Carly's.

While Carly was spilling the beans about Robin to Jason, Sam was in the locker room, getting an eyeful of Ewen after he soaped his central (showered). I admit that it was difficult for me to follow their conversation at first, because Ewen's low-riding towel distracted me. However, once I picked my tongue up off of the floor, wiped the drool away, and then reluctantly peeled my eyes off of his sexy back, I paid attention to what Sam and Ewen were saying.

It turned out to be quite the revealing conversation. Sam admitted that she sees Carly more as a rival for Jason's affections than as a friend of Jason's, when she confessed, "Well, she's not the other woman or anything. I mean, she is kind of, like, sort of the other woman. I mean, she'd love to jump in bed with my husband. I mean, she would never say no. Carly would do just about anything to take my place in Jason's life."

Sam then explained that she and Jason had set boundaries for Carly, before Sam and Jason had tied the knot, but Carly continued to cross them. Ewen definitely hit a nerve when he suggested that perhaps Jason's boundaries were different than Sam's, because Sam looked downright stunned.

Ewen was onto something, because at that very moment, Jason told Carly, who was complaining about Sam making decisions for Jason, "Then maybe you can just back off a little, and let Sam think that she's the one in charge."

What? Way to undermine your wife, Jason.

Ewen was spot-on when he suggested that Sam's refusal to share the important news with Jason was actually a lie by omission. It's clear that Jason and Sam's marriage isn't as strong as it should be, because there are some serious trust issues going on, and a serpent named Carly in their Garden of Eden. If those things are not addressed and resolved quickly, then I'm afraid that Jason and Sam's marriage is doomed.

Elsewhere in Port Charles, Johnny started to get his groove on with Connie, only for Kate to emerge. Was it an attempted rape? I don't think so. Johnny stopped when Kate said no. Granted, Kate is mentally unstable, so he had no business trying to knock boots with Connie, but I think that Johnny suspected that the Connie/Kate thing was just an act, so that Kate wouldn't have to take responsibility for plotting to napalm her relationship with Sonny. However, Johnny clearly saw the light when he heard Kate crying in her office after he had walked out. That is why he went home to tell Anthony that the deal with Connie was off.

I'm not a big fan of dissociative identity disorder storylines, but I have to admit that this one is well written, so far. Connie is not over-the-top crazy like Viki and Jessica's alters were on One Life to Live. It's really hard to tell who the real alter is. Is it Kate who has been suppressing Connie all of these years, or the other way around? Don't forget, Kate Hardwicke Howard was born Constanza Louise Falconeri, so Connie could be the "host" personality just as easily as Kate.

Perhaps, in the end, the real Connie/Kate will be a blended version of both personalities. I hope so, because, truth be told, I like the Connie side of Kate. Connie has a spark that Kate is lacking. I admit that I'm not thrilled with Kate at the moment, because I'm a bit peeved that she had the audacity to tell a grieving husband that her boyfriend had a right to be at a funeral. That was uncalled for. Sonny did not have a right to be there, much less give a eulogy that was all about Robin and Stone's great love. How insulting to Patrick, and to Robin's daughter, Emma.

Meanwhile, Maxie continues to beat herself up over Robin's death, as I had predicted. Yes, Maxie broke the lever on the gas valve, but it was an accident. It's not like Maxie took a wrench to the thing. If the lever had been that easy to snap off, then it's the hospital's fault for having defective equipment in their labs.

I was also turned off by Maxie's confession during the funeral. Again, poor Emma is sitting there. She did not need to see Maxie's meltdown. Sure it was great soapy drama, but the scene would have packed a much more powerful punch if Elizabeth had taken Emma out for another walk. It left a sour taste in my mouth to watch Maxie standing there, crying and ranting about how she had argued with Robin before Robin's death, and then confess that she had killed Robin, while poor little Emma looked on.

I also disliked the ridiculous excuse that Monica and Epiphany gave for skipping Robin's funeral. They work every day, so not going to the funeral, so that they could work, isn't really honoring Robin. It's just a moronic excuse not to go to a funeral. Call me selfish, but when I die, I want everyone that I know to be there, paying their respects and helping my loved ones through the loss. If you want to honor me, then plant a tree after the funeral, or run a marathon, or better yet, be kind to each other. However, get your butt to the funeral, or I promise that I will haunt you to your dying day, and then give you a tongue-lashing that you won't soon forget when we meet in the afterlife.

That said, the flashback scenes of Robin through the years were touching, especially the ones of Anna and Robin, and Mac and Robin that were shown during the eulogies. Those spoke to my heart, and brought tears to my eyes, more than watching Luke read a letter from Robert. Really? Robert had the time to pen a eulogy, but couldn't show up at his daughter's funeral? That was such a slap in the face to us viewers, and to the history of both Robert and Robin.

Finally, I want to say that Jason Thompson absolutely rocked his scenes this week. That man totally deserves an Emmy, because the grief that Patrick is experiencing is palpable and gripping. I was a total mess during his scenes, the morning of the funeral, when he dreamed of waking up with Robin, only to discover that, in reality, her side of the bed was empty. Later, I balled like a baby, while he fantasized that Robin stood behind him during his shower. I reached the ugly-cry stage when he sat on the bed, struggling to tie his necktie, and then imagined Robin helping him. It really impressed upon us, in a way that words couldn't, how he saw Robin everywhere.

Now, let's hear from the readers. The hot topic of the week is Robert's decision to bail on his daughter's funeral

• I was very puzzled and upset by Robert's reaction to Robin's death and Luke's solution of passing Ethan off as Robert's. The Robert Scorpio I remember would never allow himself to be played like that even from his best friend. And what was the jumping from the bridge to his death all about? Again not the Robert Scorpio I remember. And now Tristan Roger's guest appearance is over? Or are we going to see Robert chasing Ethan all over creation until the truth comes out that he's not a Scorpio but a Spencer after all? I know Robin was Robert's everything and his whole life even if he did work a world away from her but why would he not be with his granddaughter right now. I get that he's angry that Robin died and nobody has told him yet that Robin died while working on a medicine for Jason or have they told him and I missed it? Considering that Jason is Sonny's right hand man in the mob I'd think that Robert Scorpio would have a lot to say on the fact that his daughter died while trying to save Jason's life; just like Mac had a lot to say about it. I like your idea about having Robert believe or convince himself Robin is not dead and maybe even see and hear her to torment him not able to accept her death believes she's been kidnapped. - Nonniepat
• I agree that Robert's return was too short-lived and the excuse for his abrupt, pre-funeral departure was stupid - how about they finally reveal that Lucas is really Robert's son? (A nice excuse to finally bring Bobbi back, and maybe even Sean and Tiffany - then Monica could have a love interest again!)- Valerie
• I've been a long time GH fan and I truly felt cheated out of a true reunion with some of my all time favorite GH characters. I'm in total agreement with you...why on earth would Robert Scorpio just up and go on a wild goose chase for some son he's never met, over attending his daughters funeral?!?! Makes no sense. He was never around Robin in later years, so this would have been the perfect time to put her first for once. He also leaves Anna to grieve by herself. It's a selfish storyline and not convincing. - Rae M

I received several emails about the new opening credits and music:

• Why did they mess with the opening? and on top of that, they kept showing the same group of actors in [a] different order, then excluded actors still on the show, and showed jonathan j. and Lexi l. even though they've been gone for months, plus they fired the guy who was in charge of GH music to replace him with someone from OLTL, whats that about? that was the only department that was doing something right, yet he got fired faster than Guza, Phelps, and Wolf, who were all awful in their positions. - Aria
• I'm sure someone has probably already let you know this, but the new GH them song is the theme song from Night Shift, the GH spinoff from a couple years ago. Though I believe GH is using a shortened version now. - Becca

Readers are also taking issue with the decision to kill off Starr's daughter, Hope:

• I'll start with the Starr/Cole/Hope story. I watched OLTL as a kid and off and on thru the years. I was so excited to see the characters show up on GH. I was not happy about killing off Cole/Hope! No one has bothered to go and get the bodies from the car so maybe Hope really isnt gone. I agree that Starr and Michael would be a good story!! - Mary
• Sorry to say GH has been ruined for me and I can't watch it anymore. It is not the same show at all starting with the opening theme, which is atrocious. Bringing the new characters in from OLTL, just assuming that we all watched that show and already know them, I think was a mistake. I didn't know what was going on with that prolonged drive and car crash. Who were they, why should we care? As you said, another child dying. What is the matter with those writers? There's too much of that in real life. - Carol

Comments continue to pour in about the addition of some OLTL characters to GH:

• On yesterdays scenes with Roger Howarth I swear he was trying to make the town gangster Sonny Corinthos played by Maurice Benard crack up/laugh while threatening him with a gun. Roger has so energized this show. - Joseph G

I love hearing from everyone, so please keep the email coming.