I've got nothing (if I don't have you)

Without you, I got nothin. Sonny said to Carly with those big soulful brown eyes melting all of our hearts.

Close your eyes. Imagine Whitney Houston belting out that song (you know, the Pre-Crack Whitney, back before Bobby Brown beating her...) "Without you, I got nothin." Sonny said to Carly with those big soulful brown eyes melting all of our hearts. I believe that realization comes to every lover's consciousness- the moment of clarity when you know with absolute certainty that you would trade everything you possess, everything you've ever owned- for them. All of Sonny's money, power, penthouses, island casino resorts, etc. are absolutely meaningless to him if he doesn't have Carly. She is his heart.

Think of all the things they have done to one another. Think of all the things they know about one another. Those dirty little secrets you pray no one finds out about - the things most people would condemn you for, the things you have no excuse for and can't explain. Sonny and Carly know ALL those things about one another, and still - their love is undeniable, and their passion for one another is relentless. If you happen to stumble upon someone in life that you absolutely, positively cannot get enough of even though on paper it makes no sense, if you have someone who you'd lie for, or take a bullet for, and someone who'd do the same for you, if you ever are lucky enough to make such a connection, fight for it with your every breath.

On paper, Carly is no good. She's a bitch, plain and simple. If you happen to be one of the handful of people she likes, you're blessed. If not, watch out. Carly goes for the jugular. She slept with her Mother's husband, and then shot him. She got AJ drunk and dragged him out in a dumpster to trick him into rehab. She was with Jason and slept with his best friend. She was with Sonny and became obsessed with his arch enemy, Lorenzo. She called the cops in South Carolina and told them where Sonny's pregnant mistress was hiding. She picks at least one fight with someone pretty much every single day. She's done some really dreadful things. Sonny knows all that and adores her anyway.

Sonny, of course, is no angel either. In fact, he's a criminal. He kills people who get in his way. He has a raging temper, and is controlling and abusive at times. He's bi-polar and has extreme lows where he becomes unreasonable and breaks things and becomes delusional. He is unforgiving of other's actions and demands perfection. He says things like "You're dead to me!" (With a straight face!) He has tantrums. He is haunted by dead ex-wives, and is still a little smitten with old ex-girlfriends. He's gotten 2 women pregnant while he was still married to Carly. Carly knows all this and adores him anyway. When he calls, she comes, when she calls, he comes. Period.

Can they live without each other? Sure they can. They've both done it. They have both at one time or another, moved on to other lovers, and kept on going day to day apart from each other. But they keep drifting back together. Magnet and steel. There is a huge difference between being ABLE to live without someone and WANTING to live without someone. Why would you purposely choose to live without the person you most adore, even if you are capable of doing so? Why would you CHOOSE to be without the one you love? Because it's hard? So what? Better a hard life with genuine love, than an easy life with an empty soul. And so, our soul mates have reunited; even after Carly confessed to leading the Bailey's Beach police to Port Charles, even after Sonny confessed that Sam's baby was his. Even after Ric tried to pit them against one another. Hooray for Love!

I can cheer them on with a clear conscience now that Jason and Sam are falling for each other, Lorenzo and Lois are getting to know each other, and Jax and Courtney are deepening their bond. You see, I like all these players and I don't want them to be alone and unloved. I want happy endings for everyone. So, let dysfunctional Carly and Sonny have their twisted "no one else gets it" relationship - the very best kind, in my opinion - why does love have to be explained or make sense? Science makes sense. Math makes sense. Science and Math are boring. Love is delightful, never boring, and requires no reason. It just IS.

I have to admit; I genuinely like Jax and Courtney together. I didn't think I would, but I do. At the end of the Jason/Courtney marriage, she had become a shrieking shrew who just yelled at Jason for killing people, even though she KNEW he was a hitman when she married him. Now, I remember why I like her again. She's softer. She's lovely and charming, but a little sad. I realized today that I actually care about her sadness again when she and Jax were discussing her inability to have children. They have a wonderful chemistry together and the screen lights up when they are on- even when I know they aren't going to say anything of substance, I want to watch them say it.

I didn't want to watch Nu-Lois at all at first, but I find I hate her less with Alcazar than with Ned. She looks wrong with Ned, because I vividly recall the old Ned/Lois scenes, and I can't get past her being the wrong person. It's like when you watch new episodes of the Flintstones and it's the wrong Barney voice, or some new Muppet episode since Jim Henson died and Kermit sounds like... Not Kermit. But when I see Lois with Lorenzo- I enjoy their interaction and it's good to see him do something more meaningful than yell at Ned because Sage got clunked in the head with a paint can.

And, couple # 3? Jason caring for Sam's brother Forrest Gump (I think in this show they call him "Danny") is very sweet. I was so moved by the look on Jason's face when he realized Sam didn't have a Booty Call on the side, but a mentally challenged brother she was protecting. He can get bucketfuls of tenderness in his eyes sometimes and it pours out onto all of us - the camera and he do well together - anything he feels is so vivid to us. It will be interesting to see how it all plays out when Jason returns and has to explain to Carly why he lied to her. The scene where Carly tells Sonny that the honesty - that absolute trust she and Jason had is a part of Jason that was hers and that she could never get it back again, it broke my heart. Because knowing her history, we know that Jason is the one single person in her life who never let her down before. He didn't mean to let her down this time either, his intentions were to protect her, but it just didn't turn out that way. Now there is a work of healing that needs to be done. Trust is a very fragile thing, and most of us are not inclined to trust someone once they have betrayed us, so Carly will have to do some thinking. If she balances the years of faithful friendship to one bad judgment call that was meant to protect her, I think she will learn to trust him again.

Dillon. On Viagra? Please. I just can't bring myself to say anything else about the topic. Something tells me that kid does NOT need Viagra. I did enjoy the Devil/Angel scenario, the Irish Priest and the Suave Womanizer versions of himself. Very entertaining, not to mention nice eye candy to see *3* Dillon's at once. Oh wait. I'm old enough to be his Mom. And in other Quartermaine sex news - the impending pairing of Edward and Heather? Ewwww. Double Ewww.

What will happen tomorrow dear viewers? Will Heather's mere touch wilt all Lila's roses? Will Mike ever mind his own beeswax about who Courtney is dating and go gamble his tips or something? Will Mary find another amnesiac to try to make Nikolas jealous by calling him Connor? Will Faith stop trying to hide out by dressing up like Natasha from the Bullwinkle cartoon? Will Georgie get Maximum Maxie to give her some lessons in seduction already?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, so I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

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