Die with a smile: General Hospital Two Scoops for the week of August 19, 2024

My dear readers, have you heard Bruno Mars and Lady Gaga's new duet? It seemed to relate to General Hospital Friday, since someone is probably going to die in Port Charles next week.

Will it be Ava? Oh, I hope not. I love Maura West to the moon and back, and I want her to find a way to wriggle out of this jam, as she has a million others. But it worries me. The more the writers back her into a corner, the less chance she has to escape her fate. Ava no longer has Julian to come to her rescue, Scott is missing in action, Nina is over her, and Ava's one true friend, Trina, is fiercely loyal but has no power to stop Jagger and Sonny's testosterone-fueled grudge match with Ava caught in the middle.

I adore Adam Harrington. When he first arrived in Port Charles, I thought he was promising as a new and improved Jagger Cates. He had chemistry with everyone, and there was a plethora of possibilities for storylines and love matches. Still, he accidentally got sucked into the "enemies of Sonny" vortex from which there is no escape.

If I were Ava, I would have trusted Sonny over Jagger. She is still Avery's mother, and if Sonny had thought Jagger was blackmailing her, he might have forgiven her. But she rolled the dice, and I fear Sonny is right. It would be easier for Jagger to kill Ava than risk having her blow up his case by admitting he forced a false account from her.

Ava gave her false statement to the PCPD while Jagger looked over her shoulder and answered some questions to keep her on track. Anna was suspicious because Ava's new story did not match up with her original statement. Anna thought it was strange that Ava had not told anybody the first time Kristina had threatened her.

Jagger doesn't know Ava has already confided in Nina and Trina. Both women know that Ava was not a willing participant in Jagger's scheme, and they both know that Kristina didn't go to Ava's place to murder her. Ava told them it was all just a big accident.

It's absurd. Tiny pregnant Kristina sent out as a hitman? C'mon. If Sonny wanted Ava dead, he would have sent Jason. Jagger isn't thinking clearly, or he would know that no jury would believe that Sonny would send his pregnant daughter in as an enforcer.

I know I am probably going to anger a lot of people right now, but I am going to express an unpopular opinion. I'm #TeamKristina. Yeah, I know she agreed to be her sister's surrogate, but you know what? I hate Molly right now. Molly has been unnecessarily cruel. When she was at the baby's grave, screaming at Kristina, who had just gotten out of the hospital after a miscarriage, and tormented her until Kristina collapsed—I found myself lacking sympathy for her. Grief doesn't make you a mean girl; being a mean girl makes you a mean girl.

But even though I am taking sides on the characters, I have to give love to the actual human beings playing these distraught sisters. Both Kate Mansi and Kristen Vaganos have turned in gut-wrenching performances in their portrayals of two grief-stricken, heartbroken mothers.

Last night, I heard DL Hughley say something that really stuck in my soul. "Your apology has to be as loud as your accusation." And so now, I humbly and publicly apologize for being a whiny little b*tch about the recasts of Molly and Kristina.

I don't work for ABC. I have no idea who made the decisions or why, and I don't think I ever gave either of these fantastic actresses a fair shake, just because I was frustrated with the recast situation. And so, should you be reading this column, I apologize for being mad that you weren't someone else. You are magnificent in your own right. I see that now, and I hope you will forgive me if you even know I exist. You are both doing magnificent work and have brought me to tears this week.

Now, a general question… Why does General Hospital kill so many babies? This is not the first baby Molly and T.J. lost this year. Willow was at the cemetery, grieving Jonah. I will never forget dead Christmas baby Liam and the way Sasha and Brando wept over his loss. It gets to be too much sometimes.

I have a sneaking suspicion that the first surrogate who supposedly lost T.J. and Molly's baby lied. Maybe she actually had the baby, and they will find out someday. It's too cruel for them to lose two babies in one year.

Kristina has had a terrible week. She fell through a window into a pool, lost the baby she was carrying, got arrested, had to bury her baby, and now has to endure her sister's vicious attacks? It's too much. No one person could endure a week like that. If I were her, I'd be Door-Dashing bourbon to my house by the gallon.

Both Molly and Kristina made some errors along the way, but Molly has been a bit of a bully to Kristina recently. Like the day Molly shoved her papers in Kristina's face, demanding she sign them on the spot without allowing her to read them or have a lawyer look them over. Kristina genuinely believed she was doing the right thing in the interview to not reveal T.J. and Molly's personal business, but it backfired on her.

I would not have signed those documents under those conditions, either. It seems like the GH writers are gearing up to have a custody fight or breach of contract over a dead baby. If they do, I swear I will fast-forward through every scene. Nope. Not interested. It was going to be bad enough to have them fighting over the actual baby, but now that they buried the baby, I cannot imagine a lawsuit making sense in that situation.

I love my Davis girls, and I want them all reunited and best friends again by Thanksgiving. I am not sure where Kelly Monaco was this week, but Lindsay Hartley has filled in as Sam short-term a few times, and I always enjoy her work. I hope everything is okay with Kelly.

The extended Ashford family surrounded T.J. and Molly with love and support, and they were so touched when they named the baby Irene after T.J.'s grandma. I especially loved the sweet scenes with Aunt Stella and Marshall discussing having two Irenes in heaven, praying over them and sending them blessings.

However, Kristina wanted to name the baby Adela after Sonny's mom. I bet she will never accidentally say that name out loud again. Adela is actually Molly's grandma's name, too, as Adela was the mother to both Ric and Sonny, so why was that name so horrible to Molly? I cannot say.

I am very happy to see Ric. I only hope he gets something to do other than try a ludicrous lawsuit. Sonny has been surprisingly restrained this week regarding Jagger's harassment of Kristina, but if Ric gets involved, I don't think Sonny has enough meds in his system to suppress his ugly feelings for his brother.

Another happy surprise this week was the appearance of Parry Shen, our favorite shady lab tech. Bring Ryan Carnes back, and let Lucas and Brad have a second chance. I loved them together. I enjoyed the scenes with Brad pleading his case to Terry. It was nice to hear someone mention Britt, too. Now that Jason and Brad are back, why not have Britt come back from the dead and say Dr. Obrecht found a miracle cure and had her in a cryogenic chamber all this time. Why not? There are many formerly dead people walking around Port Charles.

But the return I am most over the moon about is Jonathan Jackson as Lucky Spencer. When they took that hood off his head, and I saw that beautiful face, I nearly wept. Where is he, and who is holding him hostage? We better find out soon because Lulu may need a liver transplant, and her brother Lucky may well be the best donor for her.

When Dante said sadly that Lulu had moved on and he knew she wasn't laying in her bed, pining for him, we knew that was wrong. Lulu was on her way to tell Dante she wanted him back and loved him when she was injured in the explosion at the Floating Rib. We know that the as-of-yet faceless Lulu will not be Emme Rylan, as she announced on social media that GH was recasting the role. I would dearly love to see Julie Marie Barman return to the role; she was absolutely fire, and I was sad when she left. However, I have heard no rumors that would make me think that is possible. I hope whoever GH casts has sizzling chemistry with Dominic Zamprogna. I want that old Lante sizzle.

I think that's the saddest thing about GH right now; there is very little romance. Back in the old days, ABC's tagline was "Love in the Afternoon," but that hasn't been true for quite a while. Chase and Brooklyn are in love, but we rarely see their romance. Willow is daydreaming about Drew and not her husband. Carly has flirted with Brennan but nothing more. Anna and Valentin were hot and heavy, but then he fled town. Sam and Dante mostly talk about their kids, not much sexy time there, either. Liz hasn't had any romance since Finn left town; Kevin and Laura mostly talk about Heather and Ace. Tracy almost had a love interest, but then Gregory died. Cody and Sasha had one roll in the hay (literally) in the stables. But I am jonesing for some romance, and Lucky and Lulu coming back to town might get us there (not with each other, to be clear!).

I am rooting for a Liz and Lucky reunion and a Lulu and Dante reunion. I want all the flashbacks. I would also like to see Ric and Alexis connect again, but if their daughters are mortal enemies, I can't imagine that happening.

I loved the scene today with Laura and Liz when Laura said she knew everyone wanted her to give up on Lulu and let her go, but she knows that Lulu is a fighter and would want the chance to live and come back to her family. I started watching GH because of Genie Francis when I was a teenager, and she can still get to me like no one else.

When Jason informed Anna that Valentin had switched Sonny's meds, she looked disappointed. She always wants to see the best in him, but lately, there have been more bad choices than good ones. Anna swears she will prosecute Valentin but wants to find him first for Charlotte's sake. Jason makes no promises and tells Anna he has to tell Sonny.

And he did. When Jason told Sonny that it was Valentin who had changed his pills, Sonny said they needed to use Anna for bait to draw him back home. Sonny believes that Valentin cares enough for Anna that if she were in danger, he would come back to Port Charles.

Lois' real enemy is self-doubt after multiple mean girls criticize her accent. At the end of Friday's show, it seemed as if we were heading for a My Fair Lady accent makeover. I hope not. I like Lois' accent, nails, character, and very un-demure fashion sense. I love Rena Sofer; she is so welcome on my TV anytime. I don't want Lois to lose the things that make her sparkle and unique. Here's some advice from your old Aunt Tammy. Never try to fit in. Aim to stand out. Be the most spectacular you that you can possibly be. One of a kind.

Ava is one of a kind, for sure. Jagger told Ava she had to re-record her statement and say precisely what he wanted her to say, exactly how he wanted her to say it. Ava is beginning to realize that throwing in with him was a big mistake. Here's the thing, Ava already told Nina that it was an accident, so if she goes on record saying that Kristina was the aggressor, Nina will know she was lying. Sonny might let her see his dimples again if Nina spoke up to save Kristina.

Ava and Nina had a lovely scene this week. They danced around the edges of friendship again. My BFF and I have had some doozies of fights in our 40 years of friendship, and we always eventually make up, so maybe these two crazy gals can restore their sisterhood someday. I miss them having each other to talk to. It's a lonely world without a friend to confide in. That is assuming Jagger doesn't kill Ava and frame Sonny for it.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Violet and Tracy get matching riding crops in every color? When Finn gets out of rehab, will Violet even want to go back home? Will Cyrus come to GH to visit more people as the chaplain, or will Portia have him on a most-wanted poster in the lobby? Will Cowboy James and Uncle Cowboy Cody keep up with their riding lessons when school is back in session, or will Cody just be canoodling with Chef Sasha in the barn all day? Will Maxie be more open to Natalia's opinions, since she calls Maxie "the beating heart of Deception"? Will Tracy and Lois bond after all these years, and will Tracy convince Ned to dump the invisible Olivia and go back to his first love?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

- Tamilu