What you won't do for love

Johnny loves Lulu. Lulu loves Johnny. The Zacharra family tried to get Johnny to stay away from her. The Spencer family tried to get Lulu to stay away from Johnny.

Johnny loves Lulu. Lulu loves Johnny. The Zacharra family tried to get Johnny to stay away from her. The Spencer family tried to get Lulu to stay away from Johnny. But they can't do it. They can't bear to be apart. They know a million obstacles stand between them, but they keep finding their way together time after time after time. What is, is.They have done things for one another, sacrificed things for one another, endured hardships for one another that the other person doesn't even know about.

There's an old song that keeps running through my head when I see the two of them, the title of which is also the title of my column this week. In case you don't know the song, here are some of the lyrics. And please don't say "Oh yeah that was on the soundtrack for Indian Summer" because even though it was, Go West's version was a remake.

lyrics by Bobby Caldwell

"I guess you wonder where I've beenI searched to find a love withinI came back to let you knowGot a thing for you and I can't let go

My friends wonder what is wrong with meWell I'm in a daze from your love, you seeI came back to let you knowGot a thing for you and I can't let go

Some people go around the world for loveBut they may never find what they dream of

What you won't do, do for loveYou've tried everything but you don't give upIn my world only you made me doFor love what I would not do"

As usual, the most reasonable and caring person around was poor brain damaged Jason. He took Lulu to see Johnny when no one else would partially because the letter of the law means nothing to him, but mostly because he understands what it means to be lost in your own brain. He knows how it feels to wake up and not know who you are or who all the strangers standing around you are. He understands Lulu's fear of losing her mind and wanting to savor each moment she has left.

A wise counselor once told me that sometimes we try to love other people in the way we need to be loved, but not in the way that they need to be loved. That's true in Lulu and Johnny's case- their families have decided what is best for them and have refused to listen to their own voices desperately crying out for what they actually need.

Lulu is hallucinating and obviously needs mental health care, but her guilt is weighing so heavily on her she can't think about dealing with her illness. All Lulu can focus on is that Johnny took the blame for a crime she did; he is being punished for a murder she knows for certain he did not commit.

I have to say GH was riveting this week on nearly every front, but I must give special praise to Julie Marie Berman who has again given a gold medal performance. (My subtle tribute to the Olympics, and btw, no way those girls are 16...) Julie's blend of vulnerability and fury, clear headed reasoning and full on insanity driven by her run-ins with Dead Bloody Logan has been riveting to watch. Sad that Logan is getting more air time dead than he did alive. Pity he doesn't get to say anything. I think it would be hysterical if GH went all Stepford Wives (The original) and Logan started saying "Why did you stab me, I thought we were friends!" over and over.

I was deeply moved by the scene where Sonny went to visit Lulu and she was all curled up in a ball in the floor after a particularly nasty run in with Scott Baldwin. Sonny crawled right down on the floor with her and talked to her on such a real level as he opened up to her about his own illness and how it affected him. More than anything, Sonny gave her hope. When you are going through a difficult time, hearing someone who has been there and made it through is the most comforting thing in the world. It was such a sweet scene. I love the writers when they remember the characters' history and use it to enrich the current storylines.

But here is a storyline I hated this week; Robin refusing Patrick's proposal. I just wanted to grab her stubborn little pin head and shake her around like a rag doll. An incredible man declared his love for her to the entire hospital and practically begged her to be his wife, and she inexplicably said no. I know she's hormonal. But hormones don't make you insane, just a little moody. How insecure does a woman have to be that when a man declares his love for her so genuinely to her, her entire family, and the entire population of the hospital that she still couldn't trust it? The closest I have come tot hat sort of public declaration is that one of my old boyfriends was a singer and instead of knocking on the door he would stand on my porch and sing love songs when he came to pick me up. My roommates, wholly unimpressed would yell "I hear singing, must be for Tammy."

Before Robin got pregnant she begged Patrick to consider fatherhood and marriage, and he wasn't interested. But Patrick has done a 180 and is more than ready to take those steps with her but she completely shut him down. And yes I have heard her whole argument about her parents being unable to make their marriage work excuse. I think you can only blame your parents for so much in your life, once you are an adult of a certain age, you make your own choices and whether you had good parents or bad parents you really can't blame your own bad choices on anyone but yourself.

On a side note, I would say roughly 50 of you wrote to tell me I missed the line last week when Alexis told Diane that Molly was talking a trip with Ric. You're right, somehow I completely missed that line, and I am sorry. As I said in the last paragraph, I can only blame myself. But if I could blame someone else it would be my Jack Russell Terrier, Bushi, who distracts me when I am trying to watch TV and write. He must have ALL the attention ALL the time, so he climbs on my head and nudges my computer with his nose when I am trying to work. Thus from time to time, I miss a line or two. Again, my sincere apologies for the blunder.

I have heard rumors about an impending blunder the writers are supposedly considering. A rumor is floating around that Spinelli will require some sort of brain surgery which at its end will leave him... normal.

Blech! Ick! No! Tell me it isn't so! Mind you I want Spinelli to grow as a character, but I don't want him to forever lose his goofy nerdy charm. I don't want Spinelli to wake up in the hospital and say "Yo Jason, how you doin?" instead of "I am pleased to discover that Stone Cold is here at the bedside of his loyal pupil." That would be tragic, in my opinion. He's one of those characters; some people really love him, some people despise him, but you can put me solidly in the LOVE him column. Bradford Anderson is a brilliant actor who can take an offbeat character like Damian Spinelli and make you completely fall in love with his quirkiness.

I think another quirky character is on the verge of something wonderful - our precious little goofball nurse Nadine. I resisted liking her for so long, but now, call me a traitor if you will; I do indeed like her and am rooting for her to have her dreams come true. When Nikolas "got her lips kissed off" this week, I think he was guilty because he liked it. Guilt can be a powerful emotion. He felt as if he was betraying Emily, even though she is dead just because he allowed himself to feel something. But with the help of Elizabeth, he thought better of it and they are currently enjoying a lovely dinner with way too many forks, the most delicious chocolate concoction ever and some really awkward waltzing. :

On to Mob Matters... Does anyone else find Karpov and his slutty lawyer Sasha as dull as I do? Every time they come on I want to hit the Tivo fast forward button and move past their boringness, but I dare not as you are counting on me to tell you what dull things they did and said. So, here goes. Karpov had dull meetings with Jerry and sent a boring wedding gift to Kate and Sonny took it back and he and Karpov had a snooze of an argument. Sasha went to Jason's penthouse and made a lame attempt at seducing him and he wasn't interested because even her bra was boring and Spinelli stumbled in at the wrong time and Sasha called him a little trespasser which was mildly amusing, but then it prompted Spinelli to go on a 2 day long boring tangent about the Slavic Seductress and worrying about Jason getting laid which resulted in Maxie and Spinelli going on a boring stakeout which Maxie even noted was boring while they sat in the car for hours, but at the end of the day Friday it got a little less boring because someone may have been run down by a car - we heard a distinct thud but don't yet know who got hit.

Okay, Kate's reception gown is really lovely; but Clarice is the biggest butt kisser I have ever seen. I still hate her for playing along in the "break up Carly and Jax" scheme and now even more so because every time she gushes over Kate I throw up a little in my mouth. I should start calling her Smithers, and Kate is her Mr. Burns. Kate is panic stricken because she got a drop of blood on her dress when Sonny pricked his finger on a pin and she thinks it's an omen. But apparently the fact that all his other wives have been shot at or kidnapped or blown up in car bombs doesn't give her pause. Hmm. Very curious.

What will happen tomorrow dear readers? Will Claudia ever learn Lucky's name or will she just keep calling him "Cop"? Will Shadybrook move into the 21st century and ask for ID before someone signs out one of their mental patients? Will the Quartermaines stop across the hall next time they visit Lulu and brush Laura's hair? Will Kin Shriner ever get the scene we all want where he gets to honestly grieve his son's loss? Will Liz or Lucky remember to go and check in on Sam who just got shot? Will Alexis have 5 X 7's of her kids made for everyone who is related to people who threaten to harm them? Will Max win the "stink eye" contest with Karpov's boring bodyguard?