Blog gone it!

For the Week of May 26, 2008
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 Blog gone it!
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The Dueling Blog storyline is the worst idea since the Dead Man's Hand saga.

The Dueling Blog storyline is the worst idea since the Dead Man's Hand saga. Robin's whiny self righteousness is annoying enough when she is directing it toward another character - but when she is glaring straight into the camera yammering about how horrible Patrick is, she's unbearable.

There is a great quote by Oprah - "When someone shows you who they are, believe them." But people rarely follow this advice and Robin's blog is evidence of that. Patrick showed Robin who he was from the get go, both in word and in deed. He made it clear that he wasn't interested in being a Daddy and settling down. And now Robin is online ranting to other women about what a creep he is because he's not jumping for joy that she's pregnant? What part of "I don't want to be a Dad" did she not understand? Patrick is being a responsible guy and offering his help and support, but he isn't getting giddy at the thought of 2 AM feedings and poopy diapers.

Hey Robin, let's not forget that you were going to use a random sperm donor. Why don't you shut up and be happy you actually know the father of your baby and appreciate the fact that he cares about you? Okay, I have said my peace. Do not expect a detailed account of Robin's blogs in my upcoming columns, as I fully intend to take advantage of my Tivo 3X FF button during those scenes.

Now on to something far more interesting; Claudia Zacharra and Nikolas Cassadine. Hmmm. Interesting pairing! She is definitely the anti-Emily, is she not? Where Emily was sweetness and light, Claudia is complicated and dark. Even so, in some odd way, she and Nikolas have connected. Maybe it's because they share the "Demented Family" background and have instant compassion for one another on that level. They are divulging secrets quickly due to Claudia's inadvertent confession. When she washed up on Spoon Island, Nikolas took her in -and in her unconscious ramblings she muttered things about hiring Ian to shoot Sonny which tragically left Michael in a coma.

Nikolas has realized his own part in this, as he was the one who paid Ian 10 million bucks for illegal drugs. It came out this week that Ian used that payment to score a drug shipment, which is why he was broke and had to squeeze Kate for another million. Good to know. Nikolas is the perfect person to find out Claudia's dirty little secret as he is one of the few people in town who feels no allegiance to Sonny, Carly, or Jax, all of whom wronged him at one point or another.

It will be interesting to see how this plays out - Anthony can blackmail Lulu, but now Nikolas can blackmail Claudia. Just wait until Nikolas finds out Jerry is in on this, too. Perhaps the Helena side of Nikolas will emerge and we can explore that dark Cassadine curse a little. I already told you I am rooting for a Helena/Anthony match up.

I was not, however rooting for another Carly and Sonny "Oops we couldn't help ourselves" sex scene. I mean seriously - can these two be in the same room for 12 minutes without shagging? They were so distraught about their son being in a permanent coma, (which Carly supposedly blames Sonny for) that they strip down and do it in the back of a limo? Yeah, that makes total sense.

And Jax and Kate were so terribly beside themselves over the incident that they went to a cocktail party and kissed. I can understand wanting a cocktail after such a week, but not the party and kissing part. But hey, that's just me.

When Carly got home, Jax left a note telling her he needed time to sort things out, and rumor has it his time away includes a visit with Brenda. So to clarify, Jax wouldn't cheat with Kate, but he will fly to Europe to visit his ex-lover? I'm sure Carly will be totally fine with that. Of course, she slept with Sonny (again!) thereby cheating on Jax, so I guess if he sleeps with Brenda they will be on a level playing field.

Sonny and Carly's romantic interlude was short lived once Carly whipped out custody papers. Sonny refused to sign them and claimed he would find a way to keep Morgan safe without having to relinquish his parental rights. His big plan was to have Diane draw up papers which turn the mob over to Jason, and Sonny plans to just work at Sonnybucks. Yeah, right! Jason wasn't all that keen on taking over for Sonny although he has done so in the past. Maybe Sonny has forgotten, but Jason has a son of his own now to consider, and there are too many people who know Jake's paternity to assume it will never come out. In fact, if I were Sam, I would blurt it out some day randomly just to get some screen time. Has anyone but me noticed that ever since Claudia arrived in town that Sam has been mostly invisible?

Not that I am complaining, I love Sarah J. Brown and am delighted she is back. She has the ability to make me like a totally unlikable character. If you looked at Claudia on paper, you wouldn't like her - but she breathed humanity and vulnerability into what could have bee a one dimensional mob misfit in the hands of a lesser actress.

My husband Jeff who pretends he doesn't watch GH said to me last night "I wish old Carly would dye her hair blonde again, I don't like it black." I told him they couldn't let her be blonde as they are trying to make everyone forget she used to be Carly. They gave her black hair so we would all fall into line and call her Claudia. He said "Well, I'm not fooled and I like her blonde." There you have it.

Jeff's other strong opinion of the week on the show he swears he doesn't watch is that he was very impressed by Anna and Jujitsu scene in the bar. Finola Hughes is a year older than me, and for the record, I cannot flip a guy over my shoulder, I can't throw a punch, rappel into a room, jump from a helicopter, or any other cool spy stuff. But sometimes I get carded when I go to a bar, and that's enough for me.

The writer's had to drum up an arrest for Luke this week to give him an excuse to vanish for his 6 week summer break - and he'll be missed. He took Tracy with him on the run this time, so I don't expect the summer will hold very much Quartermaine action. However, Tracy will be back in town before Luke is, so maybe he's going to ditch her somewhere in the jungle.

This leaves Lulu to her own devices, with only Lucky and Nikolas to keep an eye on her, but she never listens to anyone anyway, so I suspect she'll have a summer of high adventure with Johnny and mob intrigue. Lulu and Johnny are the only romance we have right now, so I guess we better eat it up. Robin and Patrick fight, Sonny and Kate are on the outs, Liz and Jason are pretending they aren't going to see each other, Nikolas is still mourning Emily, Lucky and Sam are supposedly dating, but she's been M.I.A., Jax fled the country - so, Lulu and Johnny. Drink it up; it's the only refreshment in town.

What will happen tomorrow dear readers? Will Maxie flirting with Federico cause Spinelli to have a meltdown? Will Robin's baby ever show, or is it going to remain the size of a Lima Bean all summer? Will Diane catch a Walleyed Pike while fishing with Max? Will someone tell Nikolas it's not a good idea to carry a lady down the stairs 2 days after brain tumor surgery? Will Sonny create some new coffee flavors for his new legit business, like Mob Boss Mocha? Will Nadine break down and tell someone she put some Neosporin and a Band-Aid on a stab wound?

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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