Tryin' to get down to the heart of the matter

It's a tale of two hearts. For one Salemite to live, another must fall! Or will Paulina perish before one can be found!? Plus, the town was full of heartwarming reunions and a few heartbreaking tales. Let's get down to the heart of the matter in this week's DAYS Two Scoops!

Well, friends. I have sad news. I was going to provide an establishing shot of Two Scoops Headquarters with a synth-pop score accompanying it, but someone ate through the budget at the Ye Old Salem Candy Shoppe's post-Valentine's Day sale. Our snack drawer, um, drawers (plural) runneth over. Conversely, and this is not a sign of my guilt, but if anyone would like a pound or ten of heart-shaped chocolates, feel free to contact me directly. As it turns out, there can be too much of a good thing. Who knew?

Since we're talking about offices, am I the only one shocked the Black Patch base of operations doesn't come with a wet bar? I'm a little disappointed. I guess that just means they work hard and take their playing hard to the Brady Pub. A good balance!

For the most part, I enjoy these establishing shots of Salem places. Aww. "Salem Place." I miss the days of walking around that outdoor plaza. We first met Nicole there at the Java Caf. Chad met Abigail there, too. Times are certainly changing, but it's fun to see more of Salem again, even if I felt like I was being taken to a lounge as we were whisked away to John and Marlena's penthouse. The thumpa thumpa of it all was ridiculously amazing and fun in a "Sure. Why not?!" kind of way.

I remember the show doing these kinds of shots a few times over the years, and there's a book, Days of our Lives: A Tour Through Salem, that had some great pictures, as well. Though I am surprised that University Hospital doesn't have that many floors. It's always seemed like a mid-rise or high-rise building. The amount of greenery surrounding it also made me pause. I thought it was more urban, in the center of town. You live, you learn, I guess.

Enough about locations; we need to have a heart-to-heart, as it were. Well. An actual "heart to heart," perhaps. Paulina probably needs a transplant, and Salem is a dangerous place right now. I feel like she might get some options. Let's discuss.

First, there's Ho-Hum Harris. He was in a coma up until a few hours ago. He seems like a likely donor. That is, if Stefan can get his act together. One job, dude. One job. More on that later, but nope. I don't think Harris should be signing a new lease anytime soon.

Jake's heart seems to work well. It's keeping Stefan and his mustache up and running and doing all sorts of stupid things. Maybe Paulina could take Jake's heart off Stefan's hands and fill ours with warmth that the dud DiMera is done driving us nuts.

Then there's Officer Goldman. One, Christy St. John is doing a terrific job with the material! I'm impressed. Two, while I wouldn't mind seeing the fallen officer grow into a bona fide baddie, Goldman is dispensable on the Salem landscape at this point. For all her evil doings, her final act of giving her heart to the mayor might win her back some major karma points.

John, Steve, and their loved ones are also in the crosshairs, thanks to Konstantin. He wants to become a pastry delivery guy and wasn't allowed to. Oh, no. That's not it. He wants to avenge his daughter's death. I hate that we're neck deep in a storyline involving the sins of Stefano and Victor's pasts that involve the Pawn and the Patch Man, and Konstantin is our tour guide. He's, um, how do you put it? Ah-noy-ying. Anyway. He's gunning for revenge. Will one of his bullets take down a beloved Salemite and give Paulina another chance to live?

Oh, and I hate to say this, but Tripp and Wendy need to be on this list, too. It's proven that the happier a couple is, the more likely they are to be blown apart. Sure, a near death experience in a former beer tank would normally do it, but I just have a suspicion that things could get worse for them. And they both have young, healthy tickers, that we know of. Unlike Brady, sorry, but they've made the list.

Mildly off topic, and I say this with love, but the most interesting part of Tripp and Wendy's captivity has been me musing, "Oh! I didn't know Salem once had a brewery by the airport," and then wondering what the beer names were. "Salem Suds" and "Salem Light" must be two of them, right? Anyway. I feel bad for the Trippster and Jing-Wen and hope they're rescued safely, but the edge of my seat I am not on at the moment, mes amours. Oof.

Also, I totally thought that when Goldman stated, "The girl has no value to us," Wendy would blow a fuse and erupt into a "Ralphie Rage" on the dirty copper while screaming "I'm just as good as Li! I'm just as good as Li!" Her father treated her poorly and saw her as "the girl." I know Jing-Wen has some pent-up fury. Let it out, friend. Let it out!

Speaking of Mr. Shin, one, Ava needs to call him. For sure. He needs to know what's going on. Two, he seems like a powerful resource. Even Stefano had to kiss his ring. Why aren't they looping him in? And three, if something happens to Wendy so soon after Li's murder, will Wei (or Mrs. Shin) return to Salem with a vengeance? It's been established that he carries some weight in the DAYS world, so perhaps he'll become a more interesting version of Konstantin.

Sidebar, I'd like to meet Mrs. Shin. She's the only one of the family we haven't been introduced to. I feel like she's a fierce force. Okay. Back to transplant talk...

There are endless possibilities to what will happen with Paulina, but one thing is certain -- she has the support she needs to make it through. I loved all the love last week! I also agree with Auntie P that having Lani, Eli, and the twins home in Salem makes it all feel complete. They were a sight for sore eyes.

I'm also very happy that Lani is finally, and I do mean "FINALLY," out of prison. If someone spots Belle, maybe they could sit down and see if there's a case to be made against that Baltimore penitentiary. That place doesn't seem well run. At all. I'll have to check it out for myself when I'm in the area totally not ruining Eli's chances at that potential new job in DC so he'll have to stay in Salem. Don't judge. It wasn't all my idea, and it's giving Julie and me something to bond over.

I don't even know where to begin, but from Abe's "secret is love" speech to Eli's hysterical little poses for Paulina to Lani's "I need more hugs" from Abe, I loved it all. In the face of uncertainty, it was all a heartwarming sight. I hope Paulina pulls through for more, merrier moments like these. As Alice -- or as Stephanie called her "Salem's go-to girl for advice" -- might say, "Have faith."

Still, I'm jealous of Julie and the gang at the Kiriakis mansion! I want to spend time with Jules and Carver, too. They're so adorable. All that happiness of the twins being with Julie, Thomas, Little Lotte, and Maggie and Victoria that Lani and Eli explained is a perfect example of a home not being a place, but a state of mind, and it's where the heart really is.

LOOSE ENDS:

Sure, Paulina's plight is bad, but there's an even bigger tragedy, y'all! That little comatose girl just "had to" wake up and take attention off Sloan. I can't believe it. SO sad. Is there no justice in Salem? In the world? In all the worlds!? Sloan's suffered enough. She must sometimes deal with the needs of a baby she stole when it's not being primarily cared for by its doting dad, and now this!? Wow. The Salemverse is unfair.

At least we can be positively sure about another thing. Sloan will never be a donor for a heart transplant. She'd have to have one first. Maybe Dr. Rolf could clone Eric for her, but instead of his face, just put a mirror. That way, she'd have the parts of him she likes, but only see herself. Wait. I guess that's not much different than now. Again, never mind.

Unlike Sloan, I'm thrilled Holly's awake. Still, she needs to shake the cobwebs out of her comatose brain and clear Tate pronto. It seems like she remembers that the drugs were hers. It's just a hunch at this point, but her face screamed guilty. Make this stop, Holly. Don't let Tate and Adele down.

E.J. needs to take a seat. All the seats. I know he's new to emotions. He's scared and lashing out, but stating Spudward is "a little swine trying to get into her pants" was a bit much. He's not you, Eej. He won't take advantage of a situation to force someone to sleep with him. Stop projecting. It's not a good look.

Nicole need not worry one bit about how things will reflect on her. Flesh-eating bacteria and baby swapping kind of overshadow anyone's views on her prowess as a mother. At this point, everyone loves Holly enough to see her as her own person, and people are just happy she turned out as decent as she did. Just saying.

More so, E.J. and Nicole need to read the headlines: "It's Not About You!" It's about Holly's recovery and letting the truth come out. Their concern for Holly was beautiful, but they're both maddening at times, too. It's too bad that E.J. doesn't know the source of the drug epidemic in Salem and could go right to the source to stop it, and...oh! Wait. He does. Shut it down, Eej. All of it.

I'm also glad that John, Brady, and Tate are proud of Jeannie-T. For being honest about her slip and what she did to Brady, sure. I am, too, I guess. But when she's sitting on a flaming pile of lies, it's hard to celebrate her too hard. That said...

I loved everything about John, Brady, and Tate, and that they looped in Timothy. Their bonds are heartwarming. I hope they stay that way. And cyber applause to Drake Hogestyn, Eric Martsolf, and Jamie Martin Mann who were marvelous in those scenes!

When it comes to Everett, I feel like we're getting "shocking storyline reveal level reactions" from characters before we actually know what happened. At this point, Jada is the only one to know what Bobby did to her. That's it. We're led to believe that even Everett isn't sure of what Bobby did. I'm not sure this Memento-like take on this storyline is slapping. We need some solid stakes and cohesive facts.

I also feel like this entire Everett and Bobby thing is going to come out in a Primal Fear type of way. Blake Berris is brilliant at playing a grade A creepster, and Everett just seems to be more "in the know" than he's letting on. I mean, he's purposely avoided Jada in Salem. That means he recognized her. He's slyly manipulative. Plus, Kayla and Marlena agree there's no explanation for his memory loss. Yep, he's an enigmatic creepster, for sure.

It all makes me wonder: Could Everett be related to someone from Jada and Stephanie's past? It's been said they were close as kids and are getting reacquainted now. Could someone want revenge on them both for something they don't remember doing? Or revenge on one of them and the other is collateral damage?

Back to that overreaction thingy. One. Jada needs to recuse herself from interrogating Bob-E. If it has anything to do with the case against Clyde, things need to be airtight. With the exception of Jada -- normally -- the Salem PD is about as airtight as a windsock. Things need to be impeccably tight to make sure that homicidal hillbilly stays behind bars forever. "Forever" or until a politician can be blackmailed to grant him immunity, of course.

Two. Jada has every right to be furious at the man who hurt her. I feel like she's been graceful under fire so far during her time in Salem as a whole, and she's seen some blazes while in town. Dumpster fire Talia would be enough to burn me out. So, Bobby must have done her awfully dirty to ignite such a big reaction.

It's a bit ironic that Kristen came out with such a banger of a line. Exasperated by Alex, she said, "Oh. My. God. You're evolution in reverse." Fair. Totally fair. He is just that. He's pure cringe, but I wish Special K would pick up what she's putting down for him. Ma'am, your character has sort of devolved over the years, too.

Still, I give it to Kristen. I loved that she also fired with, "'At times.' 'You think.' Oh, honey. That's romantic." Just as a rule of thumb, when Kristen thinks a relationship is dumb, it's dumb. Shut it down.

HOT Hallelujah! Lani's finally been released from prison AND, more so, is home in Salem where she belongs. DAYS fans need all the good they can get right now, and seeing Sal Stowers and Lamon Archey again was spectacular. It did as much for my heart as it did for Paulina's. Welcome home!

NOT Oh-Muh-Gawd. Stefan is the worst. I literally mean the worst at being the worst. He can't even be the best at doing bad things. How on earth is this schmuck the son of Stefano "Grand Revenge, Golden Cage, and a Guillotine" DiMera and Vivian "Bury Then Alive" Alamain!? When do we get to meet his stealthy entourage of flunkies who lift him up so he thinks he can dunk a basketball or shouts, "You are!" when he asks who's the coolest dude of all time. This guy is such a tool.

Also, has he never heard of outsourcing? Get someone else to kill Harris like Clyde's doing to you. Idiot. He knows E.J. has hitmen on call, and they kind of live in the same house. He's such a DiMera disappointment that I'm waiting for Stefano's portrait to sprout feet and slowly shuffle away the next time Stefan tries to talk to it.

Mr. "Neat, Clean, and Easy" wasn't even wearing gloves. That just hurt my head. When a recently un-comatosed Ho-Hum Harris can one, realize that's a bad idea and, two, overpower you, just c'mon, Stefan. Go to Alamainia and beg Vivian for tutelage. Better yet -- go to the homeland, stay there, and send Madame back in your place.

LINE OF THE WEEK "Darling, you can't change the direction of the wind, but you can adjust your sails to make sure you always reach your destination." Paulina (via Chanel)

RANDOM THOUGHTS

Tony and Anna coming home from Europe better happen soon! Yes, Anna is fabulous. Yes, Tony is amazing. Let them shine in Salem.

Abe and Lani's love for one another will never not make my heart swell up. Their effortless father-daughter bond is so genuine. Yes, Lani! The more hugs, the better.

When Ava exclaimed, "Thank God!" as Harris awoke, I was like, "Lady, God has nothing to do with this."

All the high fives go to you, Patch Man! I loved when he asked Konstantin, "Don't you ever shut up?" Seriously. I've been wondering that myself.

Nicole and Sarah's conversation was interesting. I'd like to see them chat again. They do have a lot in common.

Goldman is a beast. She's casually, "I'm getting a cappuccino. Have the guy dead by the time I get back." Of course, Stefan disappointed her, too.

I loved that John said, "Hey, Tater!"

Oh, right! Sarah is Holly's aunt. Whoops. Forgot Dr. Dude existed there for a moment.

I miss Melissa Horton and even Nathan. I think those two are long overdue for a visit (or mention).

Does Stephanie have an off button? Asking for a friend.

I applauded that Johnny stated that he and Chanel want to get a place of their own. That's solid adulting. He might want to start with a job of his own, but he's on such an upswing, I don't even mind right now.

Is asking if you should eat cherry tomatoes before they're washed really that good of a pickup line, Everett? Is it? I mean. I guess it worked. There's that. Farmers' market flirting must have a lower bar.

Roman should challenge Buddy of the famed "Burger Barn" to a cookoff. I still think the pub's fries look the best. Sorry, Buddy.

Though it would be kind of funny if "Buddy" turned out to be Cassie Brady, who's been in Salem this entire time, living her best life as a burger chef.

Thomas creating a fire safety plan is both sad and amazing. I'm sure it helps him to feel in control. You go, little guy.

It's strange that Salem's never had a predominant resident who is a firefighter. Lots of cops, doctors, lawyers, etc., and even a mad scientist, but never a character who is a firefighter. That I remember, of course.

Has anyone checked on Joey in a while? All things considered, Steve's children should probably be under some sort of protection. And we're talking Joey here. I fear for him crossing the streets by himself, let alone living across the country on his own.

Also, it was said that Joey was dating someone awhile back. Black Patch should look into if Konstantin had a granddaughter and, if so, if she's living in Seattle.

Paul and Andrew need to return to Salem for a while. Black Patch could use some help. I'd also like to see Tater Tot bond with Uncle Paul and Grandad Timothy!

I love that Paulina loves Pride and Prejudice. For their next girl's movie night -- and I know there will be one -- she, Chanel, AND LANI need to watch Bride and Prejudice. It's so much fun!

Unlike Serena Mason's problematic pachyderm statue, I actually do like the red elephant one in the DiMera mansion.

Marlena's red sweater thingy. It had a Mon Mothma vibe, right? Something was simultaneously right and wrong about it.

When Harris and Stefan were grappling, was I the only one rooting for the needle to nip them both?

Not to be grim, but I feel like Sloan would be the perfect person to decide if someone's life support should be shut off. She has no emotions. She wouldn't let the lingering last long. In fact, she'd be scrolling on her phone and be like, "Oh, I pulled the plug like five minutes ago when you stopped talking about how important I am. Are we getting lunch or what?"

Lady Whistleblower is losing his touch. He really could have covered the dual comas in a "Who Wore it Better?" way. Weak sauce, Leo. Then again, he's probably busy on Salem's version of TikTok (SandDrip?), recording his version of the "TEXAS HOLD 'EM" dance. Make Beyonc proud, Mr. Stark!

PARTING THOUGHTS

So, friends and fellow fans, that's it for March 3. I'm off to the Kiriakis mansion with maybe or maybe not a few dozen dozens of heart-shaped chocolates to catch up with Jules and Carver, so Laurisa will be back next week to see whose hearts are still ticking in Salem! As always, thank you for reading, and "That's a fact."

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