Shape up and ship out

Laurisa
Shape up and ship out

Did you like the way Salem got itself cleaned up for spring? Are you excited that Maggie is head of Titan? Should Sarah tell Xander about the baby? And if so, will it come back to haunt Gwen?

While the official first day of spring isn't for a couple weeks, DAYS started its spring cleaning early this year. Let's get the characters that don't fit anymore donated to Goodwill. Unfinished storylines need to get labeled and put back on the shelf. And someone needs to break down the unused sets and take them to the recycling center.

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It feels good to have some order, doesn't it?

First on the list was Stefan's time in the pit of despair. Thank goodness this didn't last long. I'm not sure what kind of award Brandon Barash is going for, but he earned it. This storyline is absolutely bonkers, and he managed to make it bearable.

The problem for Stefan is that now that his head is screwed on just right, Gabi has a six month no-trade clause in her marriage license. So, she can't marry, date, or probably breathe the same air as Stefan for a bit. Li will make sure of this because he's in full-on villain mode. I love this for Li. I like him as a mustache-twirling baddie. Him aiming for complete control over vs. love for Gabi makes much more sense. I also don't hate the idea of him and Sloan together at all.

That leaves Chloe to deal with Brady's mess. Look, she's known Brady for years, so she knows he's not winning any strategy competitions. But it was hard not to notice his transformation into a mini version of Kristen as he sat in the police station, arrested for kidnapping, and pleading with his mate that "he was desperate for love." Chloe's got rocking hair, a real job, and at least partial custody of the Salem brain. She may not need to bail you out of these kinds of jams. We're cleaning up this time of year, and you've moved up the list of king mess-makers!

Next, we moved to the teen scene. (Okay, they're not teens, but you know what I mean.) With Allie thankfully on the other side of the world and Chanel back at home with Paulina, that left Wendy to take over the lease for the magically growing apartment.

This is a ground-floor one bedroom with a patio that Paul first leased when he was in a wheelchair. When he left for San Francisco, Eric took over the one-bedroom lease. It was perfect for Eric because -- like Paul -- Eric was one person. Nicole and Holly eventually moved in. When Eric left, Allie and Henry bunked with Nicole and Holly. This is when that one bedroom must have been getting really tight. At one point the place grew an office where Alex could sleep, but apparently Johnny couldn't. (He still had to sleep on the couch.) Now, we learn the place has three bedrooms. Salem has a truly miraculous real estate market!

I was all for Johnny and Wendy when they first met, but I don't know now. They've gone on exactly one date, and they're already making passive-aggressive comments to each other about how "everything's fine." It's not good when I'm exhausted by a couple before their second date. While we have the broom out for spring cleaning, could we scoop this couple into the pan, too?

Moving up an age bracket, Gwen and Jack had another fight. Actually, they don't have fights (plural). They just have the same fight over and over again. But this time, Jack and Jen left town to head back to Boston to run That Other Paper. I don't actually mind where the Spectator ended up. It's a good entity to have around Salem. It's nice that one of Jack's kids is actually running it. And I can see Gwen and Stephanie sharing fun storyline beats in the future when they clash over media stories and PR integrity.

I still do mind that Gwen is so darn willing to take whatever scraps Xander throws her way. It's not Xander's fault. He's been honest with Gwen about his feelings and his soul's overall availability. She just has that little self-respect that she's willing to wait it out. It almost reminds me of when Sami would follow Austin around.

Not that Sarah is Carrie. No, Sarah's got more problems than Carrie ever could. In the span of about five minutes, Sarah found out she was pregnant, got divorced, took a new job, and decided to move to a new city. Literally, these things all happened while Sarah was sitting in the same spot. It was a "this is your life" speed dating round of decisions coming through that hospital door.

I adore the storyline of Sarah leaving town pregnant with Xander's child. I think it was fine for her not to tell Xander in that moment. She needs to process this. But, when she does, I think she'll decide to keep the pregnancy. Though I'm not sure if she'll ever tell Xander. That could lead to this child growing up resenting the father who was never there and taking aim at him and his new family (cut to Gwen married to Xander, with kids), making this new family pay. Oh, the possibilities for all involved here!

The only hitch in that plan is Maggie. I don't see Sarah keeping the child a secret from Maggie. And if Maggie knows, she'll do the math and figure it to be Xander's child. I don't see Maggie keeping a secret from Xander. But she's in a powerful position now to do it.

That's right, DAYS fans! In the last storyline cleanup for this week -- Maggie is Titan's CEO. This is huge. Not only does it finally give Maggie something to do, but a female in power at Titan is unheard of. Alex was in full ageist and sexist form when he suggested Maggie can't be CEO because she bakes lemon bars. Ugh. This guy. But he's not wrong to be shocked. By her own story, Victor didn't even think of naming Maggie until an hour before he did so. This is an Old Boys Club. It has been for generations. Maggie broke a glass ceiling here, for sure.

Loose Ends

Three years ago, Allie claimed that Sami was too overprotective, so she flew to another country without telling anyone. This week, Allie flew to another country without telling Johnny because...she was mad at him? It was decent of her to let Henry say goodbye to Tripp. But Johnny deserved at least a phone call. Sorry, that would mean Allie had to think of someone other than herself. My bad. Carry on.

On the flip side, Sonny had goodbye drinks with Chad, Justin, Alex, and Stephanie. It's clear how much all these people love Sonny. I'll miss our resident Care Bear. I hope he comes back for a visit soon! Or perhaps we'll get Beyond Salem 3 -- New Zealand Edition, where Chad and Steph fly to visit Sonny!

I totally bought the explanation that the ISA ordered John and Steve to keep quiet about Megan's return. Nicely done, writers! I also loved Tony and Anna explaining that Stefano would be well into his 90s and probably not the one Megan is trying to resurrect.

This storyline is getting good! I have so many questions. First, Bo woke up at the end of Beyond Salem 2, so who is Megan keeping on ice? Did he fall back into a coma or something like that? Is there someone else Megan is trying to resurrect?

Speaking of the fabulous Megan, is she the mad genius, or is there a rival for Dr. Rolf's title out there? She must have a team of people working with her. She can't be caring for three women, plus Bo and a possible mystery guest, and find the time to shop for those fabulous dresses.

Finally, why did she need Kate, Kayla, and Marlena? Were they test subjects? Did she need them for a trial of the Prism Pill to see if it actually worked? I can't wait to find out!

Extra Scoops

HOT Be still, my heart -- Nicole got a 25th anniversary episode! Gah! I love this so much. I adored the flashbacks. (Thank you to whoever decided it was okay to do flashbacks with other actors in them!) I laughed at the many different hairstyles. I loved the nod to Ericole storylines. I would have taken a Sami mention or two, but I don't want to get too greedy here. This was lovely and an accomplishment worth celebrating. Nicole's not a member of a core family. She's a Salem outsider who has hung in there. Now she's getting an anniversary episode. Let's all raise a martini glass to Nicole!

NOT: Listen, Chadsworth, I love you, but the last thing Stephanie needs is another immature, jealous beau. She just got done telling Alex to back off. She doesn't need you pouting about who runs Titan. Knock it off.

LINE OF THE WEEK: Roman: "She insulted the chowder. There's no soul in a person like that. Nicole always has seconds!"

I felt a ton of Caroline Brady coming out of Roman in this comment.

RANDOM THOUGHTS

I like how the Salem P.D. always has a fresh legal tablet. That's probably because they get so few confessions.

I didn't know Gwen could contort her mouth to say the words, "We have standards to uphold."

Li's a bit robotic and doesn't really speak sarcasm. In a way, he and Rafe are great scene partners. I see a fun buddy comedy going here.

I laughed at Rolf calling Brady a "dummkopf." Oh, Rolf. If you only knew.

"Frowny Face." Ha! Megan and Nicole have some things in common already.

I'd order extra oyster crackers with my soups too, Rolf.

Tripp cooks, too? Come on, Wendy. Wake up and smell the hunk.

Chloe and Gabi were actually somewhat civil to each other. Gabi admitted that Stefan called out Chloe's name -- which is very unGabi. That's embarrassing info that Gabi usually wouldn't share.

I snorted when Maggie said Victor thought Alex's personal life was a liability to the company. Did Victor watch the show in the 90s? Did he see his own self?

We learned that Megan used goat ashes in place of Kate, which checks out because we all think Kate is the fashion G.O.A.T.

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