And I'm here to remind you...

An angsty Philip easily let his imagination run wild, recalled killing a tree, and maybe killed Brady, too, while Saint Gabriel's returned to remind the devil that destroying humanity won't be so easy! Plus, Abe and Lani are still a bit bitter as a seething Sami searched for answers and a way out of captivity. All that plus a Backstreet Boy, alright! So, let's let our rage out in this week's DAYS Two Scoops!

I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. Friends, I got it. I. Got. It. It's the one thing all DAYS' fans can agree on -- how frickin' adorable is Carver!? Sorry sassy Satan, but oh, my God, I just want to squeeze those little cheeks. He even accessorizes with an avocado teething ring. Epic. I can't wait to meet Jules, too. It'll be cuteness overload, for sure. Though, let's file Abe, Eli, and Carver together under "Too Cute!" and move on, or else we will be gushing about that delightfulness all damn day.

Okay. I said we'd move on, but did everyone feel the earth screech to a halt on Wednesday? At one point, Kristen admitted that her legal problems were her fault. No, really. I'm not possessed and messing with you. She surely stated, "I brought it on myself." Wow. Just simply, "Wow!" I'll give you a second to pick your jaw up off the floor because that's big. Considering Kristen will blame the oven if she leaves something in it too long and it burns, this is a great snippet of character growth that will probably last until the end of this sentence, but it was a snippet we'll gladly take, nonetheless. Claps for you, Special K!

Maybe last week has another point of agreement: Philip should think about becoming a lumberjack! He needs a job. He loves going ham on trees or just really hates Arbor Day; either way, the woods are not his friend. So, I think it would be a great fit. It would allow him to relieve his occasional rage fits he lets fester with some good old-fashioned hard work and saplings slaughtering, instead of, you know, crowbarring Brady! Yep. That happened. So...

Philip clearly has a plan in action. He's hidden the tree he freaked out on, blamed Brady for its obliteration, planted Brady's watch as evidence, and then attacked Brady, but will he frame the sapling by putting its branch prints on the bloody knife. I think that's it. Or maybe not.

One clear thing at the moment is that Philip is not having it with what he thinks Brady and Chloe did on the Basic Black conference room table behind his back. Like, it's bad. Sitting in a dark room, festering, and listen to early Alanis while rage eating junk food "not having it" bad. Philly needs a friend to bring him some ice cream right now, and I vote for Ava. They both have a lot of fury to lament on while shot-gunning a few pints of Ben & Jerry's. Alas, he's alone and plotting.

Well. Plotted. Philly's mid-plot, actually, but boy, will he feel silly when he learns it was Rafe and Nicole -- not Brady and Chloe -- who, um, "took a meeting" on the conference table. Belly laughs will ensue all around, right?

Another thing I'm sure of is a miffed Philly is the son of Kate "The Great Vengeful Schemer" Roberts and Victor "There's No Line I Won't Cross" Kiriakis, who was carried by Vivian "I Can Do Dastardly All Day" Alamain. That lineage proves that anything he has planned will not be all that sane or good. Or even okay. It's going to be bad. Really bad. Like a nearly dead Brady in the woods beside a bloody knife is just the start bad.

In this case, though, bad can be good for us! In addition to the A-plus performances, I was ready for some movement in this triangle. The repetition didn't do any favors for the threesome. Foursome if you count the sapling. Philip certainly changed the dynamics, and I'm in for that.

Despite the false footing he's taking a stand on, he is pissed and has poured us all one crazy cocktail. It's one part Kate's flair for revenge, one part Victor's ruthlessness, and a splash of Viv's very special blend of vindictive and eccentric. The Philitini? Anyway. Yep. He's officially made his angst loud and clear. To us, at least. I think it'll take a while for his revenge to fully reach Brady and Chloe, but when it does, they'll surely know it.

Philip's actions actually lead to a good question about bad guys. Have we finally found Salem's next "big bad"? Maybe this is another temporary stop in Psycho Town for Philip. He did go on the run with a little Claire Bear back in the day and mostly bounced back from that. Still, can he redeem himself again? Do we want him to? I guess anyone can. It's Salem, after all, yet Philip dancing that line between sinner and insane is something his generation needs. He has deep roots that we're invested in, which doesn't make him a baddie du jour. It's little stolen embryo Dimples, after all. We watched him grow...ish. So, I say add Ava, and this could be one of the greatest dangerous duos to go down in DAYS history.

>

Speaking of the riverbank and wilderness in general, when in an isolated cabin, shack, shanty, et cetera, in a remote part of the woods here's a list of things not to do:

Do not open the door for strangers and let them into your cabin

And roll credits on that list.

You'd think if the last four years are any indicator, CIN's probability to be abducted, held hostage, tortured, and believed-to-be-dead again are reasonably high. So, would the daughter of two celebrated detectives who's gone through those ordeals be THAT open to inviting a stranger into their home, uh, cabin!? It was nice and all, but "nice and all" in stranger danger scenarios usually lands one on the evening news.

Look, all I'm saying is Jason Voorhees only visited Manhattan once. Otherwise, he was slaughtering peeps in the woods. So, yeah. I wouldn't open the door to any stranger while in the deep, dark wilderness. C'mon, CIN! And if you need me, I'll be roughing it in a regular room at the Salem Inn, not the penthouse. Ugh. Camping woes, amIright?

Though, to play the devil's advocate, as it were, we know BeelzeDoc has been using some powers of persuasion lately, so maybe Gabe has his own influencing skillset to use for good, allowing Ciara to sense it was an acceptable idea to extend the invite? Okay. We'll go with that, even though Saint Gabers can't interfere. I'm onto you, Gabe. Watch it.

I also must ask, IS that cabin a sanctuary? Is it, Ben? Sure, CIN has made some good memories there, but, harkening back to, I don't know, Abby's torture and a dead midwife, I don't think that place brings back all fuzzy, warm memories unless by "warm" we mean the people who were almost set on fire there...on multiple occasions. I know it turned into CIN's "Fortress of Solitude," but it's sort of a recurring crime scene, too. I guess it's one of those you say "tom-ate-toe," I say "tom-ought-toe" thingies? We'll go with that, too.

Then again, I guess the cabin with its good and evil checkered background is the perfect place for a showdown between an angel and the devil. It's kind of neutral ground. And, let's be honest, it'll certainly withstand any devastation unleashed as these powerful beings duke it out.

Alas, I've been constantly burying the lead. Saint Gabe is back! Was he a little creepy before? I can't remember. Regardless, the side of good just got a heavenly heavy hitter. It was amusing watching the mind games between him and BeelzeDoc.

Still, Satan is smug and not all that worried about Gabe's return. I'm kind of siding with the devil on this one. It took an entire troop to take it down 25 years ago, and, well, they kind of failed at that ultimately. Satan certainly has the upper hand at the moment, and the devil wasn't whistling Dixie when stating the "world is in chaos." So, sorry St. Gabe, I wouldn't be so sure of a victory without calling in some backup first. Maybe give a shout-out to Isabella's ghost and some flashbacks of Father Frances and Caroline Brady. I'd feel better with them as backup.

Gabe mentioned the river had been desecrated, and that got me thinking. Philip went wild on the tree and Brady was left a little stabbed by the river. Is that what he was speaking of? Is the cabin near the riverbank? Could Satan be controlling Philip to attack John at all ends and using Dimples to do so? Philly has been off lately. Um. Offer than normal. If so, this might be one amazingly huge umbrella storyline Ron and the writers are working with! Yes, please. Though, watch out, 'Tink! You could be next.

In other cabin (or cabin-like rustic) news, Sami attempted to liberate herself from henchman Jason, escape, and discover the identity of her captor. First, that dude needs to be examined for a concussion after Sami let out three months' worth of rage on him with a tray. Also, I'm pretty sure trays in Salem (or Salem adjacent cities) are made with the same indestructible material as CIN's cabin, as those have been dangerous, hard-hitting weapons lately. Right, Julie? I digress...

We really don't know much about Sami's abduction. She's at a rustic lodge-ish place, and the henchman was wearing plaid. That's it. So, if I use the detective skills I learned by watching reruns of the 1969 Batman series as a kid, I think Clyde is the culprit! Hear me out...

Henchmen goons always wore a basic uniform that matched their boss's theme. Catwoman's crew sported feline prints. Mr. Freeze's followers donned icy light blue hues. The Penguin's posse in posh black. And so on and so forth. So! Plaid and rustic sounds like Clyde to me. Right? The why part still has me scratching my head, but there's certainly no love lost between him and E.J. Was Sami just collateral damage? I'm probably wrong about all of that, but hmm!

Another guess I had is Alan Harris! Ron and the writers love to deep dive into DAYS' history books. Alan would certainly be one. Plus, he hates Sami and Lucas. Random revenge decades later? Sure, but surely not the first time the settlers of scores took years to strike.

On the same vein as Alan, how about Nurse Lynn Burke or Jamie Caldwell? Burke butted heads with Sami and surely wasn't a bestie. She has reasons, I'm sure. Jamie, though, was Sami's best friend. Did they have a huge falling-out? She sort of vanished from Salem in the mid-1990s. Maybe she's hanging with Don Craig and Jett Carver, or maybe she's striking at Sami for a cause we'll soon discover. She did have a crush on Lucas. Is she tired of Sami treating him as a second choice when he's always been her first one? Again, "Hmm!"

Okay, we could go on guessing, as Sami has a few million enemies, but there is another big question about Sami that I'm sure most of us were screaming: Why the flying Fig Newtons did she handle her escape attempt so shoddily!? Like, this is Sami Brady-DiMera. I expected more. Why didn't she lock Jason in the room then go out into the hallway to make calls? Sure. Reception and all, but that was weak. In fairness, though, I don't know how spry and sharp I'd be after three-plus months of capture, so I can't be too hard on Scami Gene. We just want you back in Salem, Ms. Thang. Luckily, Lucas has leaped into action!

And, yes, Allie. By all means. Stay seated. I'm not saying she had to put on a Robin costume and sidekick her pops like he was Batman, but she could have at least said she'd call Roman, the cops, the ISA, E.J. and the DiMera guards, or, better yet, Julie, as lady isn't afraid of Satan, so she's certainly not going to fear some henchman. Thinking about it, I could see Julie leading a successful rescue attempt more effectively than Lucas. No offense, Lucas. Julie could also grab Chloe. She's all ready to shank a captor if necessary.

If we're planning rescue attempts, can Sarah's be next? It's time. Plus, Gwen will certainly get what she deserves and lose Xanimal. Though Ava's loss of Rafe will be a bit maddening, as Rafe's done her just as bad. The scene where he'll inevitably scold her for being dishonest should come with a warning. High hypocrisy will be in full effect, I fear. I'm encouraging Ava to take a casserole over to Philip and continue to forge that friendship. Go! Scamper off. Don't delay.

Meanwhile. Kristen crafted her own rescue by forcing Ava and Gwen to work together. Their getting to know each other while breakout brainstorming cracked me up. It surprised me that these two have never crossed paths before, given their connections. Though, while their relationship might be a forced one, they might need a friend, er, person to lean on down the road. Gwen could certainly use a new circle of Salemites to interact with. So, maybe their losses will be a win when Kristen eventually outs them. Maybe. Or they become a trio to terrorize and take over Salem. Again, "maybe!"

Kristen's saunter out of the police station with one-fifth of the Backstreet Boys was baller!

That moment is so what I want for Kristen going forward. She needs to lose her feels for Brady, clean house, and become the head of the family. The DiMera boys will understand and cower as she sets up shop with some powerful women (and possibly a Backstreet Boy henchman) at her sides. "Criminal, businessperson mastermind" is a much better look than "love makes her looney" at this point. Or at least maybe she could find a, uh, healthy balance of crime lord and "psycho for love" like Stefano. Stacy Haiduk's fabulous. Her swagger, that epic icy stare down, her cool calculating confidence, and her general greatness are the perfect fit for Kristen's shift to become the next DiMera Don. Donness? La Donna? Godfather! Um, godmother? Nope. I got it -- Boss. Now, let's rewind that legendary walkout one more time!

#Backstreetsbackalright!

From the story about Roman and John to searching for forgiveness, I loved Abe's speech to Lani. He surely knows you don't have to share DNA to have a family. Look and him and Nicole. Him and Roman. Him and...well, Abe loves hard. Lani is lucky!

Though, damn! I never, ever want to be on Abe's bad side. When he told Paulina, "Lies come straight from the devil," he was not joking around. Abe loves hard, no doubt. On the contrary, when he's pushed too far, oh, he'll stay classy, but the scorn and sass levels are through the stratosphere. At least he heard Paulina out, though. There's that. Still, I would not want to be her -- or Tamara, as Abe took her to task, too. Abe wins even when he loses. That's why he's the man.

Wait!? Wasn't E.J. in recovery for years? His conversation with Nicole made it seem a lot shorter. That marshmallow head phase was a few years back, especially considering the time jump, but I digress again.

Not the point. Right. They're both where they want to be, and that is with one another. Oh. Yeah. That ensures Sami's homecoming in five, four, three, two...

HOT Eej is adorable. He's like a puppy with a new chew toy called self-awareness. He just discovered he can be an elitist, smug brat. Buddy. We could have told you that years ago. I kid. I kid. I mean. We could have, but E.J.'s scenes with Nicole regarding his shame for being, well, ashamed of Susan were remarkable. Dan Feuerriegel gave us a peek behind the stern curtain to Elvis Jr.'s softer side, and it was, as Nicole stated, "attractive." Bravo, Dan!

NOT Phone calls are fine, but I still feel disenchanted we didn't get to see a face-to-face Tamara throwdown between her, Abe, and Lani. Maybe the magical Marilyn McCoo was unavailable. Or maybe I've just been spoiled by all of DAYS's amazing casting surprises lately and Veruca Salted myself into disappointed. Or both.

LINE(S) OF THE WEEK

Eli (to John): "Look, man, how are we supposed to bring Marlena in? What do you want us to do, douse her with holy water?"

Paulina (to John): "Well, it sounds like I should have done more research before I moved to Salem."

LINES OF THE WEEK: THINGS VICTOR SAID EDITION

"I found the last good woman in Salem."

"Good God! How many times can one woman be possessed by the devil in one lifetime?"

"Don't."

BeelzeDoc's hilarious sassiness toward Gabe had me questioning which side I'm rooting for at times. I mean. At times. Yeah. Clearly, it's CIN and Gabe's. Clearly.

I loved Ben's "ride or die" support of Doc. I also loved that Ciara was skeptical. They make a good team.

Holy abandoned child, Batman! Brady spoke to Tater Tot. I can't believe it. Maybe the little spud will return to Salem to lift Brady's spirits while he recovers. Ha! Maybe.

On the topic of Tater Tot, Brady told him to have his mom send him big game footage. Theresa! I wonder how Jeannie-T is doing in La La Land. Is she still a designer, or has she taken up acting and starred in some Christmas movies or something!? Inquiring minds want to know.

It's sad to see heroic John take a beating. Though I'm waiting for him to quote Steve Rogers and declare, "I could do this all day." I believe he could. Always bet on John.

Also, I want John to grab his posse -- Patch, Roman, Abe, Shane, Julie (of course), and such -- and go after Satan The Expendables style. This crew would get the job done. And I really want to see that lineup slow-mo walk, geared up and ready for battle.

"She was possessed by the devil...again," will never not be hilarious.

Philip and Chloe wasted an entire Brady Pub feast. Not cool. Not. Cool.

Jamie Caldwell should have a kid that interacts with one of Sami's. That seems like it needs to happen.

John said to Steve, "Geez, man. What's it coming to when Hattie Adams is the best-case scenario?" Who wants to remind John who saved his loved ones a few years back? Hattie mic-dropped out of Salem as a hero when last we saw her.

Nevertheless, Steve and John's interactions crack me up.

I was kind of expecting Shawn-D to break out into "The Power of Love" by Huey Lewis & The News while explaining how Julie versus Satan went down. I would not have minded if that happened. At all.

I love all the "Shelle" screen-time we've been getting!

I think Allie should here on out be referred to as the Amazing A. She's a single mother who is a partner in a new business temporarily doing all the work due to Chanel being in Italy, and she's found the time -- right after discovering her mother's been abducted and grandmother's been possessed by the devil...again -- to take not only her child to the park, but Carver and Jules, too. That's a lot of heavy lifting, especially on Black Friday. No wonder she needed a minute to sit when Lucas dashed off.

When Gabe said he was in the woods for a "spiritual renewal" my first thought was, "Well somebody got lost going to Burning Man."

Ciara stated, "It's fundamentally weird." You said it, C! That's pretty much the year's slogan.

I champion nearly everything about Eli, from his intelligence to humor, but, buddy, asking your wife, "Baby, what's wrong?" at the moment is a little unnecessary. Lani's nicer than my sarcastic mouth would have been. I'd be all, "We ran out of cotton candy grapes, Eli. Guh! What do you think!?" I do not handle discovering my aunt is my mom, my mom is my aunt, and my dad isn't my dad nearly as classily and calmly as Lani does.

Does anyone else have the De-Lovely version of "Blow, Gabriel, Blow" stuck in their heads now? Please let Saint Gabers and Satan do a duet! I'll consider that an early holiday gift and won't ask for more. Much more. I did drop a few hints to Li Shin about some finger bling I spotted in Salem Jewelry Shoppe (with two P's and an E for class) while strolling through Horton Town Square.

PARTING THOUGHTS So, friends and fellow DAYS fans, that's it for December 6. Not only is Laurisa back next week with an all-new tinseled-up Two Scoops AND not only are we a few weeks away from the Fifteenth Annual Golden Donut Awards: The Best of DAYS 2021, but Days of our Lives: A Very Salem Christmas starts streaming on Peacock on Thursday, December 16! That's like the trifecta of yuletide things to look forward to. A fourfecta if you count the actual holidays. As always, thank you for reading, and "That's a fact."

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