Does anyone mourn the wicked?

Could Charlie's death have been an accident? Does Chanel have a case against Pauline? And is Theo the bad guy? Let's talk about it all in this edition of Two Scoops!

Well, friends...Charlie continues to be dead -- news I feel important to report in Salem! Cross two more suspects off the list! First (I hope you're all sitting down for this) the Salem P.D. cleared a suspect based on evidence! I know, right?! The autopsy report put Charlie's time of death hours before Sami's plane landed. Sami couldn't have done it.

Second, Ava told Nicole that Charlie had already been shot when Ava arrived. In a true heartbreaking detail, Charlie was alive when she got there and used his final breaths to beg Ava to tell him she loved him. I say "heartbreaking" because I felt for Ava, not for Charlie. That dude can kick rocks. But we know Ava to be a complicated character with conflicted feelings about her own parents. This death-floor confession could do a lot to propel her character forward. She's met Henry, but what does his existence hold for her legacy going forward? What about her relationship with Tripp?

Speaking of... Tripp is the next red herring on the list. Ava saw him leave Charlie's house right before she got there. Just like when the show had Tripp as Allie's possible rapist, I just don't feel like DAYS would do this to Tripp. They invested in this character way too much. Legacy character Steve went on the "Tripp Wouldn't Do That" world tour just a few months ago. That seems like a lot of currency to put on the line for a son who would commit murder shortly after. If Tripp was involved, it's more likely there was a struggle over the gun, and the gun went off. We'll have to wait until May sweeps to see.

Speaking of wait-and-see, Kristen/Susan is trying my patience. Mainly, the suspense of this whole storyline is predicated on our belief that Brady could be "that dumb." Mmkay. Is anyone here surprised Brady can't tell Kristen from Susan? He's been the only one to experience both. Is anyone here surprised Brady can't tell Chloe may have feelings for him? They're both beautiful people who frequently forget about their sons! Do I have to draw him a diagram?

Truth is, Kristen has gone off the rails, and the sooner Brady moves on, the better. In my opinion, the second Stacey Haiduk took over the role, we lost the Kristen legacy when it came to Bristen. That couple worked because Eileen Davidson played opposite the actors playing both Brady and John. Stacey's never been opposite Drake Hogestyn in that way. When I see Stacey's (brilliant!) Kristen, all I see is a total nutter obsessed with Brady. The true Kristen was always more than that.

Speaking of relationships in trouble, the longer Kate and Jake spend time talking either to or about Gabi, the more of a self-fulfilling prophecy it's going to be. Their relationship is already crowded.

Philip is the wild card here. It's been years since he's been on-screen with any real character development. His last real vulnerability was when he lost Claire or maybe his brief relationship with Morgan. Other than that, he's gotten reheated leftovers of romance from when he was 16 to 20. The man is 40. Gabi represents something he hasn't had in decades -- a new screen partner.

Finally, Ben and Ciara are just treading water. These two survived death. I can't believe they wouldn't survive a little amnesia.

As for Theo, I worry about him. He's clearly got an agenda. While he may not like Ben (and as Theo himself says, he doesn't actually know), Theo does know that Ciara, Will, Allie, and Claire all vouched for the guy. That isn't an accident. It shouldn't be something Theo can ignore just because he doesn't want to pay attention to it.

Since Ben and Ciara are on the same mortal coil again, someone had to take over the daydream connection. Enter Sarah and Xander. I'm a fan of this couple but didn't feel like this faux reunion was any sort of peace offering. Are we at all concerned that Xander and Sarah have virtually the same hairstyle right now?

Jan's awake! Yahoo! I love that loony tune. Considering the depths to which Gwen and Kristen have sunk, I would welcome a soap villain who breaks soapy laws.

I get so tired watching Rafe get indignant with Sami about protecting her kids. This man forged a birth certificate for Sami to keep one child from E.J. He was willing to pose as the father of Nicole's baby, again, to keep another child from E.J. (Note -- If E,J, does come back, he and Rafe have some unfinished business.)

HOT

You guys, did we know Brandon Beemer was funny? Shawn-D has always been a rather serious character, taking much more after his mom than his dad. But in the April Fools' episode, Brandon got to play that dry, Bob-Newhart type comedy with Shawn. It was hilarious! I want more of this! Landing sarcasm as a cop is a tall ask. Peter Reckell managed it, but few before or after did. I say, let's give Brandon that shot!

NOT The April Fool's episode giveth, and the April Fool's episode taketh away. What is it going to take to officially cancel Bonnie Lockhart? Not only did she rape Lucas, but in the April Fools' episode, she glorified the Father Eric/ Kristen "sex tape." That wasn't a sex tape, Bon. That was video of a rape. That type of nonsense just feeds into the reason why so many DAYS viewers wish you'd just turn out to be Adrienne. (Raises both hands!)

Paulina (to Chanel about reality): It's fair because it's my money, and I'll spend it how I want to.

While I may be harsh on Theo when it comes to Ciara, I'm fiercely defensive when it comes to Chanel's sharpening her claws on Theo. Chanel reminds me of Allie when she first got to town -- entitled and on someone else's credit card. I'm here for Paulina shutting down any of Chanel's nonsense.

Pretty much all of Sami and John's lines when John was strapped to the execution table: Sami: "The strawberries and cream thing is disgusting. It always has been, and everyone thinks so."

Sami: (In reference to Belle, whom John called "Tink"): "Well, if it isn't Stink"

John (upon hearing Belle's pardon had been rejected. "I knew I should have hired Carrie."

Wilson has full custody of Ali. This checks out.

Did you notice the one dude at the pub at the end of the bar in the scene with Xander?

I love it when Viv calls Jake "Jacob."

Why is DAYS so dark? Does no one turn on any overhead lights anymore?

It's probably good Melinda Trask hasn't appeared on-screen for the Sami case yet. Appealing to a mother's need to protect their child falls short when it comes to Melinda "I shunned my own daughter for her suicide attempt and subsequent town flogging" Trask. It would be interesting if she had to grapple with bringing charges against Tripp, though.

No one has mentioned Johnny or Sydney in any substantial fashion. I would have thought Allie, Sami, Rafe, or Lucas would have by now.

Brady saw a license plate for "The King" and buys "Kristen's" story of how Brady is "the king" of her heart. Kinda think the ex-almost-nun would have gone with Jesus here, but whatever. Brady works too.

April-Fools' Chloe didn't look so much like Ghoul Girl as she did like all of us who have worked from alternate worksites for the past year. Glasses, un-producted hair, all-black wardrobe? I'm looking in a mirror.

No joke. I'm jealous of someone in a coma from April 2020 to April 2021. So many good things happened while you were sleeping! Have you heard about these great vaccines!?

Kate lost all the battles this week when it came to her kids:

Philip: Kate said Philip was half naked (he had on his undershirt and pants) and Gabi was straddling him (she was sitting on the chair next to him).

Rex: Kate said Sarah was "fickle" when, really, Rex slept with Sarah's sister and Mimi, fathering a child with the latter.

Philip: According to Kate, he found out the hard way not to cross Xander. Truth be told, Xander found out Philip was messed up with the mob and using Titan to launder money.

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