Forget about the bad times (oh, yeah)

Hope got divorced and fired in the span of about fifteen minutes. Could that have been her best day ever? Did Claire finally find some happiness after Tripp left her in tears? And might there still be a chance for Eric to reunite with Nicole? Let's grab some breakup snacks and help our Salemites through it all in this week's Two Scoops.

There was a time in college when getting ready to leave was actually the best part of the night. My roommates and I would put on some music, make ourselves a cocktail, and laugh all over the apartment while we danced between our collective three closets to assemble the perfect ensembles for the evening. It was a fresh start! The possibilities were endless!

I know they don't feel that way now, but man, I feel like grabbing Hope and Claire for that kind of party. Hope, in particular, may look back on this as one of her best weeks ever.

You guys, she found freedom last week! More specifically, freedom found her.

Hope called Belle (hey, Belle!) on the other side of the world in probably the middle of the night. But our girl Belle lawyers so hard that she had divorce papers drawn up and sent to Rafe the next morning. Get it, Tink.

In all seriousness, the Rope romance needed to end. It was brutal to see both of these people -- good people deep down -- so very sad for soooo very long. This breakup doesn't fall on Ted. It doesn't fall on Sami. It's doesn't even fall on the ever-looming, massive Bope shadow. This couple was doomed way back when Hope dumped Rafe for a second chance with Aiden. At best, Rafe's been Hope's third choice. This relationship was never going anywhere. Don't look back, Hope. Please. Don't look back.

Next in what may seem like a bad beat but really isn't -- Hope got fired! Sure, this isn't a traditional element in one's best day ever, but this is good, too! Hope was a bad commissioner. Horrible. She misused resources and bent rules way too much. But because she's Hope, and probably one of the more dedicated characters on our show, she never would have quit on her own.

Enter Mayor Jack Deveraux. He of all his asinine, unearned, bloated ego fired Hope pretty much on the spot. She probably shouldn't have mouthed off to him, but he's such a blowhard these days, I'm not going to fault her. And now Hope is free! She's still a great detective. What if she joined John at Black Patch for a bit while she waits for Jack's administration's inevitable implosion? It could be good!

Finally, there's Ted. My dude's been coming on way too strong these last few weeks. But standing up to Jack and quitting for Hope was the right kind of grand gesture that didn't drip with sleaze like buying another man's wife jewelry did. The look Hope had on her face when he did that for her was great.

Plus, we all know Ted's better as a defense attorney. And you know who's going to need a good one? Hope's granddaughter.

Claire Bear got her marching orders from Tripp, and I say, "Good riddance!" Claire's actions are underhanded, no doubt. But Tripp was horrible to her. For him to chastise her for not talking to him shows a complete lack of self-awareness on his part. He made the decision to marry Haley without consulting Claire. He kicked her out of her home. No woman should have put up with that! Ciara said so, too! I wish someone -- anyone -- would have shown Claire an ounce of the sympathy Ciara did in that beautiful scene. But we've got it now.

And, yes, perhaps the sympathy is here just to make the reveal about Claire starting the fire even worse. But that doesn't change the victorious feeling of someone finally being on Claire's side in this marriage debacle. Victoria Konefal played that scene so very well. My only complaint is it didn't come sooner! There was something very Fancy Face about Ciara's optimism. I liked it!

Over in Hollywood, we're all set up for another round of "It's All My Fault" -- the rousing game show where our heroes rush to win the martyr crown! Let's meet our contestants!

First up, Ben! He feels bad because he wasn't on duty the night Holly was swiped. Oh, sorry, Ben. We were actually looking for "I forgot to secure the secret tunnels." Better luck next time!

Next up is Rafe, who laments that disobeying orders and following Ted caused Holly's death. That's a bit of a stretch, but we're going to give him the consolation title "Worst Employee." So, mazel tov, Raferino!

Finally, we have Eric for letting Holly live with Stefan. Of course, this effort wouldn't be possible without Brady accepting the rewrite that he tried to get Holly out of the DiMera mansion. (To be clear, the only time Brady cared about Holly's safety is when he thought he could use it to his advantage. Once that didn't work, he moved on to the plan with Gabi.)

But Eric's probably going to win this blame contest, which is a bit of a shame. I need Eric to channel his inner Spidey senses and do the one thing that only he can do -- realize that isn't the real Nicole!

From her "I don't want you to see my body" argument to her telling Sarah she can have Eric to her having a problem with the DiMera mansion, there are too many non-Nicole things going on. So, it seems like that could be where we're heading for a body double/mask storyline. And right now, my money's on Kristen behind the mask.

Not only is the ol' plastic surgery to look like a double trick DiMera 101 (Hi, Andre!), but Kristen as Nicole would make sense in the storyline. It would explain why Nicole saddled up to Brady. And if the real Nicole (who had to survive that explosion if Xander and Kristen did) were out there, she'd probably keep quiet about being alive if Xander and Kristen promised her a reunion with Holly.

LOOSE ENDS: We'll get into who doesn't have a say in who sees Baby David in a bit. But there's an interesting question in who does get to see him. Going with the assumption that Jordan is David's mom (and, man, I'd feel better about that if Rafe got a DNA test) then Jordan has the right to say who can and can't see her son. It doesn't really matter that DAYS got behind Ben's acclimation back into decent society. He could be the second coming of Alice Horton, but if David's mom doesn't want donuts, guess who's not allowed around that baby?

So, my question is all about Jordan's sanity. Is Jordan mentally fit to make decisions for her son at all? Her serenading a blanket kinda sealed the deal on that one. I think I come down on the "no" side here. And while I honestly believe Rafe has the best of intentions when it comes to David and Jordan, the time has come to get some legal clarity around this issue.

Gabi putting the moves on someone who's grieving the loss of a kid seems off brand for the woman whose sole motivation for revenge was the damage between her and her daughter. I feel like this storyline is negating a lot of Gabi's development and watering her down to a vixen who can wear Spanx as legitimate, outerwear clothing. I want a lot better for Gabi and Camila Banus -- who's one of the best DAYS has at playing fierce compassion. (See: J.J.'s suicide attempt or any scene with Wilson)

Speaking of Wilson, Will has a very special kind of brain damage. He's always been an overachiever. Again, I'm "shocked" Rolf's potion wasn't totally safe.

Abe looking up to Heaven and talking to Lexi gave me all the feels.

I adore Xander going to work with Brady at Titan! Not only is this good for Titan, but hopefully he and Brady will interact more, thus giving Brady a storyline where he's sure not to end up in bed with his screen partner.

I'm going to need to Ctrl+Alt+Delete this version of Marlena. Not only did she compare Eric/Sarah to Marlena/John (sorry, I'm still snort laughing about that), but Eric had to sit her down and have a talk with her about keeping secrets and using her listening ears and walking feet.

Oliva Rose Keegan is killing the role of a slightly unhinged schemer. I love it. Though I wish Claire had a scheming mentor to help hone her skills. Is she living in the same house with cousin Xander now? Please, please meet up for breakfast.

Yes, Jenny Bear. Yes. In the nicest, Jennifer-est way, she told Melinda that nobody has time for her tears at this point in the storyline. I. Agree. So. Hard. I was pretty numb to the revelation that Melinda was Haley's mom. I think we all saw that coming miles away. That also means we'd connected the dots to figure out Melinda threw out her own child and hand-waved off her suicide attempt. Yeah, there's not a lot of sympathy on my end for Mel -- or Haley for that matter. This whole storyline rests on C-level characters we've rarely/never seen before telling us about things that happened to them off-screen.

Kate sure seemed irritated that Xander worked for Titan. I literally have no idea where Kate thinks she's any better than Xander. She's not. Though, if there's ever been a character more gift-wrapped for Kate, it's Xander. That's not bad cologne you smell, Kate. It's cougar bait.

HOT: Sarah went to plead Eric's case to Nicole, and I was all in for Linsey Godfrey vs. Ari Zucker. Was Sarah right to do that? Probably not. But I think she's genuine in her support of Eric. She really does believe he farts rainbows. And I think she's also trying to make herself okay with Ericole. It's kind of like when you break up with someone and you (foolishly) think, "Cool. We can just be best friends now. Everything is fine! We can keep hanging out all the time, and it will not be weird at all! Yes, this is a good idea!" In a lesser actress' hands, Sarah would be a total Dumpster fire. But Lindsay threads in a lot of humility any place she can. Don't get me wrong -- Sarah can be infuriating. But that sort of makes Lindsay even more of a wonder to watch work.

NOT: When Ciara told Lani nothing about David or Rafe was her call? That. So much that. I'm ready for the bill on Lani. She's asserting control over David and Rafe's lives that was neither requested nor granted. It doesn't matter what side of the Ben/Jordan sanity tree you come down on. This isn't Lani's call. I wish Ciara wasn't so polite with her.

Also, while I'm at it, why is the show writing Rafe to be an idiot when it comes to babies? Not only did he help Sami raise three of them, but he raised his own siblings while Mama Hernandez was in bed, sick with iron lung or whatever she had for the first fifty years of her life. That's six kids altogether! Rafe should be able to parent circles around Lani, even with one arm in a sling hand tied behind his back!

This is Lani's first time around a baby. You know what first-time parents do? They mess up and Google a lot. Yet, Lani's instantly Mary Poppins? Sure, she is.

LINE OF THE WEEK: Sarah: "How many times do I have to tell you I'm engaged?" Xander: "I'm married. But I won't tell if you don't." First of all, Paul Telfer delivers on his one-liners. It's delightful. Second, I really have no idea why Victor's keeping the cat at arm's length. He seems very Victor-like to me.

Line of the Weak Sarah: "Rex is a good guy. And we're good together!" Oh, girl. Is he? And, no, you absolutely are not.

RANDOM THOUGHTS: Add Hope and Jen's girls' trip to Paris to the list of DAYS webisodes I would binge-watch.

I'll take a delicious hot dog if you're offering, Lani!

The fact that Arianne Zucker gets to play opposite Eric Martsolf, Paul Tefler, and Greg Vaughan has to help offset all of the crying she has to do.

I bet Seth Burns lost Rolf's diary on his way to happy hour with Mr. Shin, Fran from the caf, and the rest of the invisible characters in Salem.

I've always had a fondness for Rafe's tiny patio. It just feels like summer out there! I think it's the string of lights and the bistro table.

Will and Sonny got news that Will has a mutant brain tumor, unlike anything anyone has seen before, and they still made it to the polls to vote! Let that be a lesson!

Matt Ashford's read on the line, "Thanks for voting" while holding his just-punched jaw was a gem of comedic timing.

That cobalt blue looked amazing on Hope!

Somewhere, Bonnie is doing three cheers for Claire trashing Maggie's figurines.

Melinda had an "I Voted" sticker on. Think she wrote in her own name?

What was that checkbook thing Brady had? It looked like a spiral-bound presentation from Kinkos. You guys, I don't understand rich people.

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