Little show of horrors

Did you guys see that? Finally, a returning character made their anniversary debut on a happy note! Shawn-D is back, and he's giving out hugs! Where do I get in line? Find out in this week's Two Scoops!

I don't know about you, but I clapped and gasped when Hope leaped out of her chair to hug Shawn-D! Jason Cook was a sight for sore eyes. I watched him as Dr. Matt Hunter on GH, and he did a perfectly good job. But, let's face it. The dude is Shawn-Douglas Brady. I love that he's back home where he belongs.

Plus, if Shawn is back to give out hugs, I'm thinking we should send him right up to the writers' room. Clearly, they need to cheer up! DAYS has been, well, a little dark. And by "little," I mean that oh-my-gosh-someone-please-make-it-fun-again feeling. We have numerous flashbacks of the murders, not to mention that way-too-graphic-for-daytime fight scene, followed by an extended fantasy of how to commit murder. I'm expecting Annalise Keating to show up any minute and give us all an assignment!

Speaking of lawyers, the bus they got to run over Aiden wasn't cutting it, so they upgraded to a three-ton tank to make sure he's good and ruined. I give Daniel Cosgrove all the credit in the world, as he's maneuvering Aiden between a loving fianc and a resolved would-be murderer with the greatest of ease. But just because the talented Mr. Cosgrove can sell this story doesn't mean that I buy it. Any of it. Aiden is going to kill Hope for the insurance policy money to pay off his gambling debt or else Andre will kill Chase? What? Hold on. Time out.

There are only a "few" holes in this plot. First, Aiden could try telling Hope the truth. She's never left his side when he confided in her. There's no reason to believe that she would now -- especially since there is some DiMera blackmail going on here. Second, if he's going to level-up from conman to hit man, why not go after Andre and Stefano instead of Hope? Finally, Aiden was smart enough to realize that Team DiMera would hold evidence tampering over his head for the rest of his life. I'm not so sure why he thinks murder charges would be any different.

I'd like to say that I'm not worried for Hope, but after the way DAYS killed off Will for shock, maybe Hope should keep some mace in her nightstand.

Yes, I still haven't gotten to a better place about the Will sacrifice. I thought that at least the writers would get some mileage out of the gratuitous scandal they created by killing off a legacy kid. Alas, such events have not come to pass.

Sonny breezed in and out of town for a serviceable cameo. But the writers missed a huge opportunity by not having him confront a comatose Chad, or at least give statements to the police about anything related to the investigation. Sonny's return did nothing to drive the story forward.

Next, as much as I'm loving that Rafe is every bit Colombo right now -- down to the "and one more thing..." comments at the door -- he's still staring at the same evidence in the same room with the same gumshoe. At least now Lani's openly hitting on him. I wonder how that stance on not dating coworkers is going to work out when Hope is single again. But again, none of that has anything to do with Will.

Finally from the land of missed opportunities, I hope there's more to Sami's return. One, I'm selfish, and I want all of the Alison Sweeney airtime that we can get. Two, for all this talk of E.J., I feel cheated that no one even mentioned Clyde to her, much less did we get a juicy run-in between the two. Three, after a brief breakdown over losing her son, she jumped right back into the letter, otherwise known as the storyline that Sami either could have come back for, or had right after E.J. died. Either way, it has nothing to do with Will. Did he need to die for Sami to want revenge on Stefano? Nah. No way.

But thankfully, things picked up at the wake. (There's a sentence that could only exist in a soap column!) In strolled Andre, dripping with his patented blend of insincerity and dastardly ego. Finally! Some actual history got thrown around. Sami pointed out that Andre tried to frame Shawn for murder. Abe got in a well-deserved dig about Lexie. Oh, and Roman punched Andre in the face. Thankfully, the violence this time was played more for camp than...well...you know. We all saw that Ben/Chad MMA match. (If you missed it, just wait five minutes. They'll flash back to it.)

I loved Marlena's hopeful, "Tony?" as the gang all got their first glimpse of Andre. Being the gentlemen he is, he graciously explained that the statute of limitations had run out on most of his crimes, and he had a shiny new pardon from the governor for those still outstanding. And then, he apologized.

You guys, I guffawed at his apology. Literally, it was a bark of joy that came out of my soul. Yes, kids, you should always say you're sorry. But, the chutzpah it takes to brazenly offer an "I'm sorry, I've had therapy!" as a resolve for being a serial killer is downright impressive. Basically, Andre is the new Stefano, and I'm okay with that! Thaao Penghlis could not play this role any better. Let's give him a hug too! LOOSE ENDS Thank you, Joey, for explaining the difference between leaving for an amusement park and leaving on a serious mission. This excellent point has been lost on the previous male generation in Salem. There may be hope for you yet, kiddo!

J.J. announced that he wants to be a cop. Of course, Jen and Abigail freaked out. Abigail had a valid point about finishing college first, but it's a bit hard to take advice from her because she doesn't exactly rock it in the life choices department. Look, J.J. makes impulsive decisions. At least this one isn't going to have immediate bad consequences. I say let him try it. He'll probably find he's better suited as a P.I., but I like that he has taken a liking to the family business of investigation.

Oh, Paul. Stalking your crush at his husband's grave? Really? Where are your friends? Why are they letting you embarrass yourself like that?

Finally! Bo was in an actual scene with someone we know. Steve and Bo are ready to ride again! Could completed sentences in English be next? I know; I know. I like to dream big.

Apparently a side effect of having the BRCA1 gene is that one has a split personality. In her previous scene with Justin, Adrienne told him how she'd loved him since she was seventeen and he deserved to know what was going on with her health. This week, she practically bit his head off for doing research for her. Maybe Adrienne needs a Snickers.

Speaking of that research, isn't Mike Horton an oncologist? (I vaguely remember him treating Chloe and/or Kate.) Let's check in with that guy! We haven't heard from him for five years. It's time!

I enjoyed J.J. and Gabi's scene again. From the looks on her face, it seems like perhaps Gabi did too. Heck, I even liked that they bonded over Paige! Good job, you two!

This whole nonsense about Caroline being an oracle makes me mental. Come on, DAYS, you already have an established psychic on the show! Her name is Celeste. Bring her back for a cameo, have her warn Abraham that she senses a disturbance in the force, and have Abe gather the regulators to mount up and go get Beauregard! Really, this one should have been a ground ball.

So, um...that dance? Well, at least she didn't shave him! And yay for spending the money to pay for the rights to John Legend!

HOT

Robert Scott Wilson and James Read were nothing short of spectacular during Ben's confession. They've always had good father/son chemistry, but this took it to another level. Clyde saw right through Ben's lies. I'm 99 percent sure Clyde was horrified his son grew up to be just like him. But there was still that little piece of me that wondered if Clyde was going to use this information to bargain his own way out of jail. That uncertainty made Clyde very interesting in that moment.

Ben desperately wanted to confess. Somehow, Mr. Wilson managed to play Ben with just a hint of humanity. Ben's a monster. But he's not an Andre-type monster. This one is capable of real human feelings. In a way, that makes him more dangerous.

Amazing work from both actors!

NOT Will's funeral scenes left me feeling very hollow. The brilliant DAYS cast did all they could. But if the point of killing off a major character was to get some investment in this storyline, then at least use that character's history when remembering him to engage the audience. Instead, we got a weak guest list and these accounts of events that never played out on-screen.

I don't remember Sonny giving Will a copy of a book when they got engaged. And I certainly don't remember Kate ever wishing that one of her children would become a writer. I'm sure her war-hero son, who lost both a leg and face while serving his country, will be glad to know he's such a disappointment to her. It was like I was watching a funeral for some stranger, not a character who's been part of DAYS for two decades.

And where the snot was everyone? Victor, Justin, Adrienne, and Steve "I'd do anything for my family" Johnson should have been there to support Sonny. Maggie is a Horton and Lucas' sponsor! There was no reason for Kayla to be at work when Daniel is around. Doug and Julie show up a day later, and Julie doesn't squawk once about how tragic it is to lose a Horton? She lives for that kind of thing! No Brady or Theresa to support Sami? And don't even get me started on the fact that Carrie and Austin raised Will for more years than Sami and Lucas, yet they didn't even send a plant. Boo.

LINE OF THE WEEK Kate (to Sami): "Long time no see, partner." Okay, so there was one thing I liked about the funeral! RANDOM THOUGHTS When did Aiden adopt Glee's Kurt Hummel? Probably about the same time season one Scandal's Huck took over the role of Bo.

Unintentionally hilarious line of the week goes to Caroline for, "Roman, I'll take my rosary now." My sentiments about the future of this fiftieth exactly, Care-Bear!

I guess they tore down the church set. All the funerals are in the park now.

Aiden should probably wash that tie he has his fingerprints all over it if he plans on using it as a murder weapon.

My mom is a little mad that Chad is still in a coma. She has this crazy idea that DAYS' best actors should always be in scenes where they get to speak. Oh, mom... I'm a little shocked that Andre would send cheap Champagne. He may be a lot of things, but cheap isn't one of them.

Wait, Parker decided that he wants to walk Nicole down the aisle? Parker's list of decisions involves which cookie and train to play with. When did he start weighing in on his dad's romantic future?

Hope asked Abs and Jen to be bridesmaids. Great. Now Aiden has to scrounge up more friends!

It's still a little weird that Daniel calls her "Maggie."

I don't think Abigail understands how reward money works.

I guess Caroline's visions about people in trouble only extend one generation, since she was clearly shocked about Will.

Everybody drink! Nicole used the phrase "in my whole life" with a man.

That's all for this week! Tony will be back next week to make sure that hugs are appropriately distributed. I think we all need one!

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