The mess you left when you went away

Kristen worked overtime to convince certain Salemites she's changed, but Marlena can't help but to remember the mess she left when she went away. Plus, Daniel chooses Nicole over Jennifer. Well, sort of! Grab your Swiffers because it's time to try to clean up the mess in this week's Two Scoops.

You may have heard a contented sigh just now. That was me. I'm still on cloud nine that my beloved demon child Kristen is back. Just give me one more moment to merrily giggle, and we'll get down to the subject at hand, and that's dissing DAYS in its entirety. In fact, there's a lot to dig into, so let's just get down into the nitty-gritty and discuss!

KRISTEN and... The fab Ms. DiMera made her way around town, and I loved every last one of her scenes. Eileen is the best! And everyone from Doc to Brady brought up Kristen's rather messy past in Salem. But, HA! Her crimes have reached their statute of limitations, and she's free to roam around as a free woman. Delicious! Let's see what everyone had to say about Kristen's return...

...MARLENA The look on Mar Mar's face was worth the price of admission! I'm pretty sure she soiled her pants. Sure, sure, Marlena has every reason and more to not want Kristen back in town, but I loved watching her freak out. Something tells me this will be just the tip of the iceberg of Doc's downward spiral. Sorry, I'm trying not to snicker.

I absolutely loved the way Kristen was so casual with Marlena. I think it irked the good doc even more. I cracked up when Marlena asked how she knew she was in the park and Kristen nonchalantly replied, "I followed you, of course." Damn, there goes that snickering again. Again, I digress.

I'm glad one mystery is cleared up. Since E.J. was forced to resign as mayor, a lot of us have been wondering who the new one is. I think Marlena elected herself because she was pretty quick to tell Kristen she shouldn't have come back to town. Hence, I guess Mar Mar is in a position to dictate that. I kid, I kid.

However, it was curious that Marlena slammed Kristen's recovery by saying, "Therapy. That will get you fixed." Um, is Marlena a shrink who genuinely believes anyone can change? Well, she may be a shrink, but she's never a hypocrite, so there's that.

All things considered, Kristen and Marlena are going to eventually collide like two runaway freight trains, and I can't wait to watch that mess unfold. Kristen doesn't worship at the House of Marlena. She doesn't care if she wrinkles Marelna's perfectly pressed pantsuits. And Kristen brings out Marlena's backbone, and Mar Mar with a backbone is so much more interesting than, well, normal Marlena. So, ding, ding, ladies! Let's begin round two!

...JOHN I might be in the minority here, but I always liked John and Kristen together. Their reunion was a little icy, but I think John will be the first to open up to the possibility that Kristen has changed. Oh, Marlena will love that, but not as much as I will.

...E.J. I lost it when Kristen told E.J., "You're my little bro." Ha! I know that E.J. is keeping up his guard, but I suspect he's starting to realize Kristen would be a good ally to have in his corner. He should. Kristen knows her scheming stuff. Plus, she has a lot of power to throw around like Stefano, but she can also relate to the unique burdens of being one of the Phoenix's children. That's a good combo. And that's sure to make Kristen E.J.'s bestie in no time. More, please!

...CHAD I was impressed that Chad didn't shoo Kristen away. I really thought he'd be all whatever about her strolling into his life, but he seemed interested in getting to know her. I like this idea! Chad needs family right now and, sure, Kristen may not be the best influence, but at least they have a clean slate to eventually muck up. Plus, Eileen and Casey had nice, instant sibling chemistry. Again, I say, "More, please!"

...SAMI What's not to love about saucy Sami and crazy Kristen mixing it up? Nothing. Nothing I tell you! I hope Sami stays at Countess Wilhelmina, because the possibilities would be endless. Although I'm surprised that Sami didn't give Kristen a pat on the back for messing with Marlena and John back in the day when Sami hated them both. I guess our little Sami Gene has matured.

...BRADY Brady is slowly becoming the non-annoying version of Billie. He sort of randomly pops up, says a few things, and then moves on. However, he needs a real storyline, and Brady getting involved with Kristen would be a juicy one. I'm in!

RAFE, NICOLE, DR. DAN, JENNIFER, and E.J. In the interest of full disclosure, this storyline could board Rex and Cassie's spaceship, zoom into outer space, and never be heard from again, and that would be all right with me. But we're stuck with it, and I'm stuck Scooping it. So, here we go...

First, I'm glad that E.J., Rafe, Dr. Dan, and Nicole had a little chat about their shenanigans. It was good to see smug Rafe squirm a bit. However, I'm even gladder that E.J. said he'd leave it alone. I highly doubt he actually will, but that only makes his enemies more uneasy, and that's delectably fine.

Now let's talk about Jennifer. I have sympathy for her. I do. Aside from the laughable and frustrating way she's been, uh, "mourning Jack," I do feel bad she's being blamed for something so heinous that she didn't do, and that those accusations are causing her hardship not only with her loved ones, but at work and with E.J., too. That part is super sucky, and Jen doesn't deserve the scrutiny. Poor Jen.

As for Dr. Dan, his decision to whisk Nicole away if she dropped the charges against Jennifer is honorable, but silly on so many levels. Her choice to go away with a man who basically said she was his consolation prize was even sillier, but more on that later. Dr. Dan's heart was in the right place, but Victor would bitch slap him for being so stupid. Think, Dr. Dim, think! If Nicole genuinely believed Jennifer killed her miracle baby, would she ever let it go? Would any parent? I'm thinking "no" on this one. I wish Dr. Dan would, too. But at least we have a bin of baby clothes that might open his eyes to the truth. Well, here's to hoping anyway!

Oh, oh! I can end this section on a positive note. I cheered that Lucas went to visit Jennifer. Hope is always there for Jen (which I love), but "Lucas and Jennifer: Siblings" is a tale rarely told. In fact, I nearly forgot that both Jennifer and Hope were related to Lucas. Then again, the writers seem to have as well. So, just a suggestion, writing buddies, old pals, try on more Lucas with his family time, and less Lucas badgering Sami time. Let's discuss that next!

SAMI and LUCAS Okay, I know that there's something written into the DAYS bylaws that states there has to be an obligatory "Lucas scolding Sami" type scene once a month as long as Bryan Dattilo and Alison Sweeney are both on the show. I get that and roll with it. And most of the time, Lucas is spot-on, but not last week. Not at all.

What Lucas said to Sami about putting Rafe on a pedestal is only semi-correct. Sure, Sami (along with 99% of Salem, it generally seems) worships at the altar of Saint Rafael Hernandez, but Rafe does a fine job of placing himself up there and tooting his own perfect horn. Ugh.

But more so, Sami shouldn't have to lie down and take being with a guy who lies to her just because she's made mistakes in the past. By "some mistakes" I mean a boatload, but I digress. If Sami should just settle for whatever she can get because she's done bad things, that means Lucas should, too, but something tells me he wouldn't be quite as ready to accept Sami, Chloe, Carrie, or Nicole back in his life.

Furthermore, Sami doesn't search for perfection in every man she fancies. If that was the case, she would never have reconciled with Lucas -- several times, mind you -- or flirted with the idea of getting back with E.J. So, dear Lucas Horton, you're not entirely wrong, but you're also a bitter little ex who's not entirely right, either.

CAROLINE and COMPANY This storyline makes me more uncomfortable than walking on a wet, slippery floor of a crowded china shop while on crutches and staggering drunk. I'm not overly confident that the writers are able to handle this with long-term care. They have a way of messing up things from "time to time" (Read: normally). I'm sure in the writers' minds, Rafe will decide to become a doctor, sail through med school in a few weeks, and then find a cure for Caroline's condition. Or, maybe he can just wave his magical hand over her and cure her like he did with those lepers. Anyway...

Bo is heading to Cali with Caroline to be with her as she goes through a clinical trial. That's Peter Reckell's blaze of glory, it seems. Hmm.

I'll be honest. This is a tricky one. I can't help but love Bo even more because he's willing to uproot his life to help his ma. That's commendable and sincerely touching. It makes the character come full circle almost. He used to cause trouble for his folks, and now he's there for them when they're in trouble. He's a big boy now, and that's a good thing.

But after thirty or so years of playing Bo, I'm not sure this storyline has enough pizazz to really celebrate Peter's tenure. I don't know what kind of exit strategy would really please me, but this one's too delicate for me to give it my full support. I know I wouldn't want to see Bo die. That never works out (See: Jack, and Stefano's umpteen deaths that never stuck). I like that Bo can come back whenever he wants, but will he? And will there be a good enough reason if he doesn't? Yep, I'm a little nervous, folks.

On a lighter note...oh, dear. I love Fancy Face, but maybe she isn't the best person to pitch in at the pub. I mean, she can't even boil water. Perhaps Max can come back to be the manager again (and bring Chelsea with him). Ponder it, writers. Ponder it.

And on a positive note, the cast has really been giving their all to this storyline, Hope's support has been awesome, I enjoyed Abe and Bo's goodbyes, and, in general, I love seeing so much of Bo and Kayla interacting. I only hope Sweetness gets as much airtime once Bo and Caroline are gone. Since there will be only a few Bradys left in town, there's no reason she shouldn't, but again, I'm a little nervous. Excuse me while I pop a Tums for my anxiety, and by "Tums," I mean scotch.

WILL and SONNY Okay, Sonny, marriage jokes after a few weeks of dating are never cool unless you want the guy to run away. As a good friend pointed out, if a chick did that to a guy, her friends would beat her down with her own crazy stick. I think there was supposed to be some "The More You Know" type lesson in there, but the joke fell flat. Really flat. As did punking Kate. That was even lamer. You could tell she wasn't amused. But more so, Kate is the last person to freak out about gay marriage. If Will sincerely wanted to marry Sonny, Kate would have the town square covered with rainbow bunting in a second and have Elton John ordained to perform the ceremony. She's cool like that.

Also cool was Will trying to see T and Lucas' perspectives. Sonny states he's impatient, but I like that DAYS is taking time to show Will's loved ones coming to terms with his coming out. Sadly, not everyone in the world wears rainbow glasses, so sometimes it takes time for folks to come around. Sonny knows this and stated as much, but he needs to cut T some slack. T's no longer throwing punches and even complimented him. That's progress, dear Sonny.

Speaking of progress, Will and Sonny seem to be ready for the next step. By "next step," I mean Sonny's comfy-looking double bed and some boom chicka wow-wow. I have no problems with this at all. They've known each other for a long time. In fact, they're actually adorable in their affectionate banter with each other. Plus, they're young and in love. And believe it or not, most young and in love people like to sleep together. So, good for them. Just play safe, boys!

LOOSE ENDS I'm scratching my head about something. Are John and Hope still technically married? I hear John and Marlena, and Bo and Hope, calling each other husband and wife, but I don't remember a legal divorce and remarriages. Hmm, if I were Kristen, I'd look into this. Just saying.

Aw! John and Brady's scenes were totally cute. I love how these macho men can still express their feelings. Good stuff!

Um, I have no real idea as to why Kate visited John. It didn't make much sense. But at least we got to see two vets interact. That was something.

Abigail and Chad had a cozy little scene together. Interesting. Very interesting. These two were never that exciting as a couple, but I like the idea that they're friends now.

Finally, I'm also scratching my head about Nick's reaction to Will and Sonny. Gabi knows there's something up. And like her, I want to know what that is, too!

EXTRA SCOOPS

HOT: Three cheers for Peter Reckell! He might be walking out the door soon, but he's bringing his A+ game to DAYS as a last hurrah! His acting has been amazing throughout Caroline's storyline, and I can't praise him enough.

On topic, Laurisa will say an official goodbye to Peter next week when his last scene airs, but since this is my last chance, I will say a deep and sincere thank you, Peter. Even those silly non-soap watching people know the rebel with a cause Bo Brady, and that's because of you. It's been an honor to watch you for, well, my entire life. In fact, I can't think of a time when Bo Brady wasn't part of my TV-watching experience. I've never stopped rooting for Bo, and I'll never stop rooting for Peter. I hope the next chapter in his life is filled with as much happiness as he's brought to all of his fans, especially this one. So, thank you, Peter. Sincerely, thank you. You will be missed.

NOT: Oh, dear, dear, Nicole. What's wrong with you, girl!? I'd love to attempt my best Cher from Moonstruck impersonation and say, "Snap out of it!", but I regret that still wouldn't make her listen to reason. And that reason is, the dude just told you he's in love with someone else, but will go away with you and try to make it work since his said love interest will be miles away. And Nicole said yes. Grief is a pretty powerful thing, no doubt, but this gal's gotta value herself a little bit higher. It's downright pitiful at this point. Someone get this girl a dirty martini and a small dog because she needs to remember how fabulous she normally is!

LINE OF THE WEEK: T (to Will and Sonny): "You guys seem happy, and happy is good."

EXCHANGE OF THE WEEK : Marlena: "I have a sick feeling of dj vu." Kristen: "I know! All over again. Just like the old days." Marlena: "No, not quite. We're not locked up in a room together." Kristen: "Not yet."

RANDOM THOUGHTS: I totally love that Caroline requested a green helmet with a shamrock!

Salem has the clumsiest people on earth.

Mmm, John's assistant Mindy is lovely. Too bad there wasn't a man in Salem who needs a love interest. Paging Lucas!

Will was playing a guitar at a coffee shop. Sorry, Willy, but the '90s called, and they want their clich back.

Sonny commented that T wears ugly shoes. Excuse me, Monsieur Kiriakis, but I've seen you in some pretty suspect shirts.

T is trying to woo Audrey Perkins, but has he met Abigail Deveraux? Just saying.

This week on Mr. Chad's Neighborhood, he'll explain how he merged Mr. Rogers' sweater and a Miami Vice jacket to make his very own neon retro cardigan.

HALLOWEEN IN SALEM: Just like those whacky folks in Salem, Laurisa and I have been busy preparing our annual "Halloween in Salem" blog. Find out who we decided should dress up like Prince Harry, who we thought would make the perfect Scarlet O'Hara, and which Salemite fits perfectly as a shoebox. Yes, I said a shoebox! We'll be updating our blogs on Halloween and also sending out some trick-or-Tweets, so be sure you're following us on Twitter (@LaurisaDays and @ Tony_S_DAYS)!

PARTING THOUGHTS: So, friends and fellow DAYS fans, that's Two Scoops for the week of October 29! I hope everyone has a fantastic Halloween! In the meantime, I'm off to celebrate week three of Kristen's return with a mocha latte in her honor, but Laurisa will be back next week to usher in November Sweeps, and "That's a fact!"

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