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Darin Brooks has natural charisma, but unfortunately, he's competing with Bryan Dattilo for biggest waste of talent.

Welcome to the first official non-Sweeps week, kids! By the way, sweeping is a very good thing to do. It utilizes a broom rather than those aerosol sprays that can be harmful to the environment. In fact, did you know that Chez Rouge has given up sprays all together? That's right. Their bartenders use a broom to sweep the cranberry juice into the martini glass rather than using a beverage gun hooked to a CO2 tank. I know that doesn't have anything to do with this column, but I'm under contract with Bo Brady to fill an allotted amount of otherwise useful column space with an eco-friendly message. Now that I have done so, I will continue on with this "Two Scoops".

I really enjoyed this week in Salem! We got to see characters that usually don't interact have little scenes together. The writers switched it up a little, rearranging some of the one screen duos. I loved it! It gives us a chance to see and predict what the future (you know, that thing we need to preserve the earth for) may hold for the citizens of Salem. PHILLIP He did it. He planted the drugs. I'm not too surprised. But, I was surprised, if not overjoyed, to see Victor lay in to the teeny Titan. What is it about Victor that's so dang cool? Phillip needs to start taking notes.

I'm actually kind of excited to see what happens from here. In soapland, the true test of a Power Boss is someone who commits a crime with everyone knowing about it, yet, no shred of proof can be traced back to him. Victor is trying to cover things up for Phillip, but Phillip isn't handling it well at all. Sometimes I wonder whether Phillip is trying more to compete with John, or impress Victor.

I don't think he's going to get very far though; because Phillip is handling this whole situation pretty carelessly. Not only does he need to account for half a million dollars; but, it seems like he may have utilized corrupt official du jour, Paul Hollingsworth, to help plant the drugs. Using a guy who is getting ready to be indicted to help you commit a crime isn't exactly a display of shrewdness. Oh well, at least Phillip has Abe, Roman, Bo, and Hope on the case! That should buy him a lot of time to think of a cover up plan. If someone like....Nicole were to find out, then Phillip would have to think fast.

LUCAS Horay for Bryan Datillo's impressions! Not only can he impersonate James Scott (complete with accent) but he gets bonus points for pretending to be a Martian. I'm also glad to see Lucas showing some love for Johnny. After all, it's always helpful to have a back-up twin in case you happen to lose the first one. The dude lost his own daughter. I actually thought the scene played out quite humorusly, and I mean that in the most non-child endangerment way possible. From the obvious wide open French doors, to the fact that Lucas put Ali in her playpen after her escape, to Lucas's phone call "Hi Sami, I'm in jail...again", to his laugh-out-loud excuse of "Come on Sami, you know how fast she is!" the whole scene seemed less tragic and more vaudville to me. We all know that Lucas isn't a mean spirited baby hater and while I can understand Sami and EJ's desire to kick Lucas out of the Babysitter's Club (ya with me 80's girls?), I think that this is one of those "no one really got hurt and it's never going to happen again" situations. Had it been intentional or gross negligence, I'd be worried. But, seriously, even though Sami and EJ's remarks were totally 100% understandable (and you know Lucas would have done the exact same things if the roles were reversed), Lucas isn't that bad of a dad.

Unfortunatley, Lucas is an all around Debbie Downer. I wish the writers would let Lucas have a little, tiny grasp on reality. The guy just got out of jail. He was supposed to spend 10 years in prison; instead he got out in a few months! I get that he feels jilted in the love department. But, he has a beautiful daughter who he gets to see all the time, a nice house to live in, and the opportunity to visit with family memebers without being embarassed. Every single line of dialogue should not be one complaint after the other. I get that he is a glass-half-empty person but at least his glass isn't in prison anymore. That's a huge deal! Lucas needs to move on. And no, I'm not talking about Sami. I am talking about his character overall. It's time for him to be happy about something! He's become the forever antagonist for all things Sami Brady and I don't want to see any character be a constant punching bag. I'd like to see Phillip petition the court to change Lucas's residence to the Kiriakis mansion. Lucas needs some family in his life and Phillip really needs a big brother right now. Who knows? Lucas might even be able to work for Titan, have another mansion to play in, have tons of time to spend with Ali, and possibly run into women who aren't Sami Brady. CHLOE Chloe met with a real estate agent to start looking for a place to live. Yet, she doesn't have a job or any money to pay for this place. I'm so bad with math. Quick, someone tell me what 6% commission of $0 would be????

All kidding aside, I'm glad that Friends Forever bear is making the attempt to have a life of her own. Chloe and Phillip's fling is hot and all, but the writers have been downright stingy when it comes to giving us pairings that are both fresh and romantic. So, I was extremely insulted when the writers had two characters come right out and tell each other that they don't want any romance out of their repeat relationship. It's refreshing that Chloe might have something other to do than Phillip. (Pun intended)

Chloe is right. She needs all the allies that she can get. Last time I checked, the only person that she is friends with is the guy who's keeping her around for her "benefits". I don't think it would hurt her to join a book club or something. That brings me to Lucas. It's way too early to make a call on Lucas and Chloe as a romantic couple, but I am so excited to see more of this pairing. If ever there were characters that needed a fresh storyline more than Lucas and Chloe, I don't know who they would be. I felt like I was watching two new characters- and I liked both of them! The dialogue was a little hot and cold, but overall nice job, writers! It's amazing what can happen when Chloe's not throwing herself at a guy and Lucas isn't getting his heart broken. STEVE and KAYLA This week Steve worried about Kayla worrying about the baby - again. Despite how desperately I want to embrace the Johnson family, I just can't get emotionally invested in these two. Not only is their storyline puttering in the slow lane, but they've been lapped so many times that the exhaust from the Good storyline van is now damaging the ozone layer. First, remember when Kayla caught Steve in bed with Ava? Even though it was to save Kayla's life, I don't know why Kayla didn't even think to address it with Steve after they were rescued. Then, remember when Steve had a job? Me either. It's great that Kayla makes mad doctor dollars, but Steve needs to do something to get himself out of the apartment. Finally, remember when their daughter confessed that she was raped and finally agreed to go see a therapist? Gee, it's not like Kayla knows what it's like to be raped or anything. Good thing we didn't have to watch any of those touching mother/daughter scenes. I know that dropped storylines are sometimes part of soap operas. But, when great veteran actors like Mary Beth Evans and Stephen Nichols make my fast forward finger twitch, dropped storylines are inexcusable. Once again, the most interesting part of Steve and Kayla's storyline is a character who isn't Steve or Kayla. My heart literally broke for Chelsea when she looked at Joey and then touched her stomach. Join me over in my Soapcentral.com Blog to discuss an infertility storyline for Chelsea. I can't wait to see how this storyline plays out!

MAX This week, we learned that Bo is the Jolly Green Giant (only better looking) and Max is the Incredible Hulk- ready to snap into a rage induced rant when provoked. Max snapped at Pete, Rusty, and John. I can see why "Scarface" is his favorite movie. I love Darin Brooks. I think he has natural charisma. Unfortunately, he's competing with Bryan Dattilo for biggest waste of talent. Quick count: Max is a racecar driver/mechanic/investor/assistant bar manager/dock worker/genius and now, a trigger temper rage machine. I see why Darin Brooks received his Emmy nomination. Any actor who can deal with that many stupid storylines at once; yet, still deliver his lines without laughing and/or rolling his eyes should be given seven Emmys- one for each personality that Darin Brooks had to portray. PSA: IT'S NOT EASY WATCHING YOU BE GREEN Days has been no-so subtly referencing going green in all of their episodes. Personally, I think there are a lot worse things that Days could champion than being environmentally friendly. (Dating members of your own family immediately comes to mind). But, here's the deal writers: Don't club us over the head with useless knowledge. Very few of us viewers own a restaurant like Maggie or a pub like Caroline. It's real swell that Big Red and Sweet Caroline are going green, but if you honestly want your show to make an impact with the mass audience, do subtle things that real people can actually do. Show how Bo and Hope recycle in their own house. Show Sami going to the store to buy one of those weird twirly lightbulbs. Show Morgan making sure that all the lights are off before she leaves the sorority house. Show Phillip conserving water in the shower. (or, just show Phillip in the shower, period) Show me information that is actually applicable to ME...the average woman, with a mortgage, who'd love to save $20 on her utilities and if it saves the earth too, awesome. I'm not going to run out and buy a hybrid car tomorrow or open a new green restaurant. But, I'll probably go to the grocery store. I'll definitely buy something online. Give me information that I can use in MY life. If you constantly make these grand green gestures, (ie- Touting the green hospital that SuperDan set up in Switerland. I don't own a hospital and I'm not going to Switzerland.) it comes across as shoving the information down our throats and we don't like it!!! Thank you for your time. We'll now return to our regularly scheduled column.

DANIEL and CHELSEA Speaking of SuperDan, the good doctor made some very odd decisions this week. He told Chelsea that he is absolutely crazy about her, but he has some things to figure out on his own. I used the word "odd" to describe his decision because I'm not sure what the writers are doing. Dansea is a very controversial couple, age wise. For me, the fact that Daniel is into Chelsea is the one thing that actually keeps him from being a sugar coated superhero who sneezes life-saving pixie dust. The guy's got to be conflicted about something and I think falling for a younger woman was a good place to start. I don't think that we've seen the last of Dansea. I'm hoping that the writers stick to internal drama in this relationship and not throw.....I don't know....Abe and Lexie into the mix! LEXIE and ABE I saw what happened behind that curtain. And, I didn't like it. I am sooo not in the mood to see another Lexie Carver affair! Abe and Lexie need to continue with Theo's storyline. I'm very interested to see how Dena Higley handles an autism storyline. Such an important storyline should not be corrupted with Lexie sleeping with someone who isn't her husband...again. As my partner Tony pointed out to me, if Lexie does have another affair, Abe needs to leave her quicker than those Polar Ice Caps are melting. Eventually, it becomes his fault too for staying in the relationship. I totally agree with Tony. I'd even go further to say that I wouldn't have blamed Abe for leaving after Lexie's first affair. Here's hoping that James Reynolds and Renee Jones get to sink their teeth into a real socially conscious storyline. I've always loved these two actors and I think they would do a beautiful job!

BO and HOPE They really are "a man named Brady and his lovely lady" aren't they? I thought the salsa dancing was hilarious. You could tell that Peter and Kristian had a good time with it. The cool thing about Bo and Hope is that they have actual storyline material outside of their marriage. They both have jobs. Not only that, but swashbuckling jobs as detectives! I'm so glad that Bo and Hope were assigned to the DiMera drug case. Bo will have to struggle with his ties to the Kiriakis family and Hope will be able to relate to John being brainwashed by the DiMeras.

JOHN Thanks to the brain trust that is Abe and Roman: Salem PD Elite! John was arrested for drug trafficking. But, John got out on bail just in time to find out that Marlena is on another trip to Colorado. I hope Marlena is back from her trip soon. I enjoy new John the most when he is with Marlena. They make a strange comedy duo. Her reactions to the things that he says are half of the humor! The writers hit a homerun with this new version of Jarlena. Without Marlena, John is just cranky Rain Man. John and Ava were interesting. The actors played off each other very well. And, Ava actually treated John the way I think the rest of Salem wants to- like a strange droid who looks like a human, but is missing the sensitivity plug-in. Ava and John could spend some more time together. They have the same affinity for head-to-toe black wardrobe, know the effects of brain scrambling, are represented by EJ, and respect Marlena. I don't see a romantic pairing, but I like the idea of John spending time with someone who knows what it's like to have someone else control you and is trying to recover from that. Yeah, for John and Ava! EJ Our favorite son soldier of Stefano drowned his sorrows in something a little saucier than Sami. No, I'm not talking about Nicole. I'm talking about that all important post-break-up friend, Ms. Tequila. He woke up the next morning with hella hangover and the not so cool news that he told Nicole about his plan to lie to Sami about the status of their annulment; news that Nicole threatened to use against him. I'm not saying that EJ is fully redeemed, but this dumb idea surely doesn't sound like a DiMera plan. Stefano's probably rolling over in his coma! For those of you who missed it, EJ's plan was to lie to Sami about something that is a matter of public record. Brilliant! Next, he should convince her that she is pregnant with his child. All he has to do is tell her and she'll believe it! Alas, I feel that EJ is loosing part of his DiMera...and I'm not quite sure that's always a good thing (see: the new John Black)

I thought that the most storyline promising thing that EJ did this week was to meet with the immigration official again. We don't know what they said, but it doesn't sound good. I started a list of predictions: 1) EJ bribed the official to make up the whole deportation thing in the first place 2) EJ bribed the official to ignore the annulment papers and not revoke EJ's visa 3) Lawyer EJ is bribing the customs official not to deport his new half uncle who coincidentally, is not a natural born US citizen 4) EJ may have the goods on another not-so legal Salemite and tipped off the over-zealous custom official. NICOLE I love Nicole and I want to root for her. But, I can't root for a character who won't root for herself. Saying that she's falling for EJ? Whaaaa? This is the same dude who PAID her to help him get attention from another woman! I know that he's teasing her with those kisses, but how many times does EJ have to start a sentence with "If I wasn't in love with Sami" before Nicole realizes that madly in lust is about all she's getting from EJ? I felt the same way about Nicole that I have often felt about Nick Fallon. I want both of them to set their sites on someone who can recriprocate their feelings. Wait.....maybe Nicole and Nick......ehhh...just a thought. In my dream world, Marlena will come back from Colorado with Eric and Nicole and Eric can get back together. A girl can dream, right? :

SAMI I'm officially convinced that Maggie is an Ejami fan. First, she (or an alien imposter) set Lucas up to catch Sami living with EJ. Then, she called Sami to come to the restaurant and grab EJ away from Nicole. I see your game, Mags! Despite the obvious interference from Maggie, Sami had her own reasons for grabbing EJ. She doesn't want Johnny's father to be embarrassing himself all over town. Man, that argument sounds good. Too bad it's just another excuse for Sami to delay making a choice between Lucas and EJ. I think that deep down, she likes the attention she's getting from both men, but she's not ready to actually take any action that would tip her hand one way or the other. She tells Lucas that she wants to be with him, yet she accepts kisses from EJ. Sami used to be a bad girl. Now, she's just bad at making decisions. Like Tony said last week, I miss that Brady Oomph that Sami has so much of. I have a feeling that a martini swigging blonde and an opera signing brunette might reenergize our little Ms. Brady-Reed-Walker-Roberts/Horton-DiMera. (err...did I miss any?)

LOOSE ENDS: What's up with all the people slamming shots at Chez Rouge? First Daniel and his boys, then EJ and Nicole. Don't get me wrong, I all for cutting loose once in a while, but Chez Rouge always struck me a little more as the champaign/martini rather than the lemon drop/tequilla type establishment.

I actually get where Victor is coming from in regards to his despise of Chloe and her responsibility in Brady's drug addiction. Make no mistake; I think that the final blame falls on Brady himself. But, I feel like Chloe had a lot of options for helping Brady and none of them involved moving back to Salem after he disappeared and lying to people about why Brady wasn't with her.

Someone tell me why Kate is back meddling in her kid's lives? First of all, she promised Roman that she was done messing with Sami and Lucas. But more importantly, she's a lot more interesting to us fans when she doesn't act like such a busy body! The lady is running her own Martha Stewart line of something-or-others. There's got to be a storyline for Katie that doesn't involve her GROWN children.

Phillip got out of bed with Chloe to think about Morgan.....hmmm......something tells me that our favorite Greek god might be interested in making some new friends.

Did anyone else catch Bryan Datillo trying not to laugh when EJ came stumbling back into the mansion? James Scott's performance ranks right up there with drunk Belle and drugged Roman. He even grabbed a drink off someone else's table as Sami was dragging him out of the restaurant! Something about fake drunk people makes me giggle every time.

Extra Scoops: LINE OF THE WEEK: Chloe's description of Ejamicus: "Oh my God. Wow. There is no right word for that. Is there?" No, Chloe there isn't.

HOT: Nick and Chelsea. First, the surprisingly refreshing break up writing continues with Chelsea trying to be friends with Nick and Nick telling Chelsea that he's just not able to be friends. I was all set for Nick to turn on any pathetic chance that Chelsea gave him, yet he actually did the healthy thing and stood up for himself. Good for Nick! Second, Chelsea had a great talk with Hope. I'm a huge sucker for any scenes with these two. But, Hope hit the nail right on the head when she told Chelsea that everyone makes mistakes in love and everyone is going to get hurt once in a while. But eventually Chelsea will find a love that works. Both characters might just come out of this break-up looking good and there's nothing hotter than that! NOT: Commissioner Abe Carver. Abe accused Ava of using her dad's money to help John get drugs. Abe tolled John that John's bail can be revoked at any time. Abe refused to listen to his (Chief of Staff) wife's opinion Theo's health. Is Abe trying to be the biggest idiot on the show or is it just a natural characteristic? I have a headache from rolling my eyes at this guy.

Special Reminder: Don't forget! The 2008 Emmys will air on Friday, June 20 on ABC and Days of Our Lives is nominated for 6 awards!! Since Tony and I are admittedly addicted to TV, we'll be watching the show and doing a super special Emmy extravaganza for our fellow Daytime junkies. More details coming soon! For now, head over to Soap Central's news section and get caught up!

That's it, Days fans! I hope that you are excited about the summer storylines as I am. Let me know what you think EJ met with the immigration official about, how long it will be before Phillip gets caught, and what you thought about all of the interesting on-screen duos that we got to see last week!

Happy viewing! Laurisa

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