Assorted sweets and shenanigans

For the Week of October 30, 2023
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A nougat? A nugget? Or something utterly nutty!? You never know what you're going to get when you reach into the Salem plastic pumpkin and pluck out a storyline. So, will you be tricked, ticked, treated, or all three? Find out in this week's mixed, merry, and a bit mischievous DAYS Two Scoops!

I love that Monday is Halloween Eve! It's a nice way to start off a string of fun events. There's Halloween, of course, which is always a fun time in Salem. Dia de los Muertos is a beautiful, festive yet reflective time. November Sweeps starts, too!

Also, a particular show that we all love and adore has an anniversary on the eighth! It started in 1965, so that means -- according to Soap Math, SORAS-ing, de-SORAS-ing, time jumps, and time spent in soap comas, possessed, and the Aqua Net haze days in the '80s that might have had lingering effects on time and sanity -- DAYS will be around Holly's new age. I think. The maths are real hard. Just ask RACH3L.

It shouldn't be overshadowed that November first is also the day Halloween candy usually goes on sale. It freezes well, and that may or may not make it more delicious. Just saying. But I digress.

So! Since there's a lot going on and a big plastic pumpkin full of terrific tricks and treats, we'll celebrate the unpredictability of it all with an anything goes column full of random, assorted Two Scoops nougats, nuggets, and a lot of nuttiness!

I kind of died laughing at the following exchange. Don't worry. I came back to life to write this column. You know, Salem Life (and "Death"). Anyway! The exchange:

Eric: "I know she'll be sorry she missed you."

Marlena: "Well, no she won't. She's uncomfortable around me."

I also thought Marlena telling her stepson, "Brady. Brady. You're going to lose your little girl, honey," was her big Oda Mae Brown, "Molly, you in danger, girl," moment. It was. It really was. And he did.

Kate admitted she misses intrigue and scheming a little bit. Oh, Ms. Roberts! We miss you intriguing and scheming a lotta bit.

Oh, snap. Maggie got a "Vic pic!" Okay. I'll see myself out.

I don't believe for a second that Dimitri doesn't have a lifeline to Megan. She's like a next level stage mom. There's no way she'd let her little chip off the demented block THAT far out of her sights.

It was questioned if Ava could handle restaurant manager life because it's so full of hard work and stress. Yep. That sums it up. It's very hard and stressful. Though, I always bet on Ms. Vitali. Yes, she can.

Tater Tot got a promotion to "to-go" duty. Congrats, spud! Sorry, Salemites. You might not get the sandwich you ordered, but whatever's in that takeout bag will surely come with a side of teenage angst and privilege.

I wonder what Marlena's "I Told You So, Sucka!" dance will look like the next time she sees Brady. I'm imagining some "Macarena" moves mixed with a little "Gangnam Style" riding the invisible horse.

I am sure Lauren Koslow loved the nod to David Bowie when Kate stated that Thomas and Little Lotte were watching Labyrinth. Loved. It.

Jada is such a rock star! She really is the reason things get done at the Salem PD.

Wowza. There's absolutely a special place in Soap Hell for "Stabi," probably on one of SNL's "Love Toilets," but something about that wig-wanting weirdo, who raped a mentally ill woman, being alone to manipulate a child was super-duper cringy. Ghost Angel Abby needs to come back and flick him in the throat until he cries for his mommy.

Aww, Stefan's mommy. Auntie Viv. I miss you already.

Yes! Well played, Team DAYS. I love that Wendy is becoming the "Garcia" of the Salem PD. On Criminal Minds, Penelope Garcia was a hacker and had a choice: go to federal prison or work for the Feds. This is the lite version, but I'll take it.

Will Ava become a double agent and give Ho-Hum Harris and the Popo the 4-1-1 on what's really happening at the Bistro, or will she try to hide what's going on to keep Tripp safe? Spoiler: Tripp's not going to be safe as long as she's involved with Clyde, so I vote on her being an inside source on the inside of the inside. Um. That she helps the Salem PD.

Also, call cousin Angelo!

Color me confused, but I'm not sure why anyone is shocked that Xander is suing for custody. Sarah started this war. Any parent -- repeat any parent -- would retaliate the same if the other party planned to keep their child away from them. Had cooler heads prevailed when Justin called Sarah, he could have explained that the process was started before they made the headway they did. It's so stupid. At least he and Maggie could address it head-on like adults who love each other and happen to massively disagree.

Kate really needs a hobby. Can she join Anna's mah jong and wine club? That could be amusing.

Sloan's sneaky and shady, but she's one sly envelope switcher. But did she swap the right "1 2!?" I think she did. We'll find out if E.J. flips another lid.

Conman Konstantin kinda sucks, right!? I'd worry about Maggie more if she didn't have Xander on her side. He's going to ensure there's comeuppance for conning our Sweet Lady of the Lemon Bar.

Rafe stated that the guy who slashed Tripp was a "junkie with no ID." Didn't Tripp call him by name? Granted, could be a fake one, but Rafe-A-Roni's willingness to give up makes me worried.

Fun fact, as per the original television treatment for DAYS, Dr. Tom Horton was an accomplished baseball player but left the diamond behind for medicine. So, Thomas' Halloween costume was a cute, fun nod. Also, Little Lotte is the most adorable little sister and sidekick.

Oof. I know Brady knew he was lying in bed with dogs and would likely get fleas, but it was still a little rough watching "Stabi" stab him in the back.

On the other hand, watching Kristen stabbed in the front by "Stabi" wasn't not enjoyable. I mean, all three of them are terrible people. Kristen's used RACH3L as a weapon since conception. "Stabi" followed suit. So, yep, a-holes be a-hole-ing. No surprise there. Sorry, not sorry, Special K.

Between the photo album, dinners, daffodils, and now that portrait of Victor, Konstantin is a half can of Axe body spray from coming on WAY too strong. Come on, Maggie. You can spot this son of a gun through your grief goggles.

Also, that portrait of Victor! Are we in love with it? I mean. It's a beautiful likeness, but I feel that Mr. Titan himself needs his own thing, not Stefano's. Then again, Victor's legacies are Titan, his love for Maggie, and emotional scarring, so I guess a painting is easier to hang.

Oh! I got it. In true Greek fashion, there should be a sculpture made of Victor. It could be modernized to have one of those motion sensor thingies installed so that when one walks by, it could snark out one of his famous zingers. "Oh, my God, my eyes!" "Now I've let you get away with a lot, mainly because I don't listen to most of what you say." "Oh, how astute of you." "Like fish in a barrel. Pew. Pew. Pew." And of course, "Anybody order a hooker!?"

"Horton Town Scare" makes me happy! I can't wait for the full Halloween episode. My mind's spinning while wondering which random character cameo may happen. Serena Mason and Paige Larson are still close to the top of the shocking visits list. I didn't think we'd ever see them again.

Speaking of "Serena," since nearly every other actor and their wigs are doing double duty these days, can Melissa Archer return as someone new already? Maybe Cassie Brady or Benji Hawk's widow?

Oh, Patch Man. Where do we begin, old friend!? You were right to call Dr. Sweetness and admit you stepped in it. Your heart was in the right place. You apologized to Stephanie, but papa don't preach. We're still taking your harmonica away until after the holidays for even thinking that talk with Chad was appropriate. Steve needs Tripp to stick by his side at all times. In the past, the young Dr. Johnson has been able to get his dad to realize misogyny is not okay. Ever. At all.

I feel like DAYS needs to do a Frasier-like spinoff as a Peacock exclusive limited series for Deidre Hall. Funny Mar Mar is the best! Hall slays. We could see her treat some of Salem's zaniest patients and such.

Who wants to be the one to ask E.J. how his "powerbase" building is going?

Knowing what we know as an audience, that scene between Alex and Xander was brilliant. Their "Opposite Day" conversation. There were SO many "This will come back to bite you" moments. I can't wait for the reverse of it. Will Xan be as gracious to Maggie, whom he defended? Will Alex be able to let go of his precious!? Methinks they ultimately both win. Alex remains rich and, more so, reclaims Justin as a father. Xander gets richer and, more so, wins the stepmother lottery.

I know that "Stabi" doesn't want to share their toys, but this vying for DiMera stocks schtick sort of lost its shine. Audiences may get excited if one of the shareholders had this AMAZING plan for the future of the company, an epic idea for a product or service, or were even baseline competent businesspeople. Yep. That would be one thing. As it is, it's just a bunch of a-holes repeating the same storyline with lackluster results. It's a soapy tale, but it's tremendously low stakes and somewhat elitist at this point in time. And with no Tony and Anna in sight or thought that we might get a Peter sighting; the fabulous factor drops tremendously this time around.

The vintage flashbacks of "Stayla" were great!

It dawned on me that Ava and Li are now roommates.

The role of Gil Carter was well cast! David S. Lee totally pulls off the "middle management" pompousness, psycho combo perfectly. He's smarmy and unscrupulous, and I can't wait for Ava or Clyde (or cousin Angelo) to take him down a peg or ten.

It's heartwarming when you hear stories of people who simply want to help their fellow humans so selflessly and compassionately. Like Sarah. She wants to be a doctor again to -- oh, right. To strengthen her custody case. Whomp. Whomp. That'll inspire tons of confidence from her patients.

I loved Chad committing to the vampire bit so fully when answering the door.

Oh, call cousin Angelo! Did I mention that?

Stephanie summed up her relationship perfectly. She stated, "I'm a little confused." Sing a little Michael with me everyone because, Steph, "you are not alone."

Life is not fair in the DiMera mansion. Tiny tot RACH3L wasn't allowed to go as a "pirate wench" for Halloween, but Kristen got to dress up as skater who put her costume on backwards? Frederick's of Hollywood mannequin? G.L.O.W. wrestler!? I'm not sure, but she werked it.

I'm such a sucker for Maggie and Brady scenes. There's such a charming warmth between Suzanne Rogers and Eric Martsolf. Their characters have always had that special bond. From A.A. to simply adoring each other, I love it!

Not to be out-charmed, I also adored the scenes between Maggie and Xander. Suzanne has such chemistry with Paul Telfer, too. Even when times are tough or flat-out rough, Mags and Xanimal have a respect and love for each other that makes you believe they can get through their difficulties.

If Konstantin's dad was able to give Victor seed money, why didn't he give his son some to start the restaurant? Lots of problems could have been avoided. Just saying.

Eric visited Mr. Dorsey. He's always outreaching to a person in need. He should really become a therapist and join his mom's practice.

Of course, Gil says things like "minutia of it all." He gives me '80s movie Wall Street d-bag vibes. Which means the actor is doing a great job.

I love a good Kate and Chad scene.

Was Marlena dressed up like Groot? I'm not sure what that thing on her head was, but I liked it. I can hear her explain it as a "touch of whimsy."

I'm pretty sure DAYS has their own version of the conspiracy theory that Nicholas Cage is immortal. Those flashbacks of Steve and Kayla prove that Stephen Nichols and Mary Beth Evans do not age, either! I guess making a deal with the devil to remain youthful is easy when El Diablo lives in Salem, USA.

Wait. Hiring criteria at the Salem PD is to do something Rafe can't? So, if you can solve a crime, you're in?

Can we all please be invited to this meal with Marlena, Sloan, and Eric? It won't be a super awkward supper at all. Nope. Not a bit.

More so, I totally want to go to Grandpa Tim's for supper! You know there's after-dinner singing and dancing. And he'll break out a secret stash of "the good" ice cream or other candy contraband he's probably not supposed to have there.

I do not believe for a second that posh Sloan has a paper shredder sitting in her living space right when you walk in the door. Then again, given her knack for nastiness, maybe she does use it a lot to cover up crimes. Whoops.

If Chloe's still unemployed, maybe she could create an app that sends Brady and Marlena daily RACH3L stories that will make them miss her less. The Chlomeister has many that would help them. Remember when she tried to give RACH3L stickers? Eek.

A "RANDOM" bit from Laurisa! Brady stated, "I don't understand why he would let Alex's true paternity remain a secret for all these years." This is a fantastic Easter Egg for Passions fans. Eric Martsolf played a character whose paternity was the big secret for a good run of the show. His romantic lead uttered the phrase, "Ethan's true paternity," at least 87 million times. Hearing Martsolf say those words would be like hearing Dee Hall say, "That's a fact," on another show.*

*Like a Frasier-esque spinoff, perhaps!?

Extra Scoops

As I won't be back for a few weeks, I want to cyberly scream an early, "Happy Anniversary, Team DAYS!" Thank you for a lifetime full of entertainment and warm, welcomed memories, and the friendships that have been made along the way by all of us crazy, committed fans who love life in Salem, USA. May the sands never run out of the hourglass. Cheers and lots of love, Team DAYS!

While I know she was heartbroken, Stephanie also runs a PR firm. She knows the power of words. To state that Chad will never love her as much as his dead wife and then run out was a very, very low blow. Cruel, even. She and Chad were having a difficult but honest and much-needed conversation. She totally ruined that momentum. That's a shame.

To be fair, Chad should slow the roll on referring to Abigail as "the love of his life." She was, and everyone knows that, but it's still insensitive to Steph. Nobody likes being compared to an ex, especially a dead, practically canonized one. Still, there's no reason Chad won't love or doesn't, perhaps, love Stephanie just as much. It's just in a completely different way because she and Abby are different people, it's a different relationship, and it's at a different point in his life. Their lives.

What bugs me is that they have been good at having honest conversations with each other. When Chad messed up, Stephanie delivered that beautiful speech that he can trust her, she gave him no reason not to, and she did nothing to make him doubt her. She was right! Then she was dishonest with him about the marriage conversation. Ugh.

I don't think either of them got into things with a nefarious agenda. They both have baggage that should have been unpacked before they committed. Warp speed did not and will not work for them. They should have done the relationship equivalent of "dog sitting" for a friend to see if they could care for a canine companion instead of buying an entire doggy daycare center and overcommitting. They both needed time and space to heal but rushed to create a nuclear family fantasy without really addressing their core, individual problems. They're right. They're simply not on the same page at this point. If Kate can't help, Marlena can, I bet! There's never been a head she couldn't shrink.

Personally, I wouldn't want to compete in the race for someone's heart if the prize has already been claimed. But that's just me. I have self-respect and day-old Halloween candy to eat. I'm set, but I again digress.

"Alex and I are like oil and water." Maggie to Xander

*High five* Preach, Reverend Kiriakis. Preach! We be like two peas in a pod.


So, friends and fellow fans, that's it for October 30! I'm off to call cousin Angelo, but before I do, are you ready for Halloween in Salem!? Or are you more excited about the candy sales on November 1!? As you ponder that, the one and only Laurisa will be back next week with a Two Scoops full of amazingness! As always, thank you for reading, and "That's a fact."

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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