Friends in low places

It was a week of returns of some of our favorite dirty ladies! Nancy Wesley made a welcome visit to Salem. We started to get to know Anjelica Deveraux again. And Claire debuted as Hester Prynne. Let's discuss it all in this edition of Two Scoops.

While I do still love this destination storyline, things on Gilligan's Greek Island are getting a little loco. And I don't just mean Paul.

For starters, Lani's upset J.J. wasn't putting out, so she went to cry to Eli about it. Hearing about women obsessing over another man is totally the type of thing he digs, so obviously Eli is/will soon be hot for Lani. This makes me nervous. I'm barely tolerating Lani by herself. I can't root for her as part of any pair. Lani needs some time unconnected so she can develop her character a little more. Isn't that what we tell people to do in real life? Fix yourself before you go getting into a relationship with someone else? I think I read that on an Etsy coaster somewhere.

Elsewhere, Gabi and Chad flirting seemed a little out of place, as well as out of character for these two traditionally non-airheads. Yet, the single parents don't know if they'll see their children again. There's a 50/50 shot their best friend may have to shoot his boyfriend. And all they seem to be able to think about is rubbing up on each other.

Oh, and Gabi's question has an easy answer. "What if Abigail changes her mind?" Chad's going right back to that Horton lady. He's done it every single time she's given him the slightest hint that there's a chance with her. I do believe that he's grateful to Gabi for helping him feel alive again after Abigail's "death." But grateful doesn't equal love. While I don't think Chad is intentionally trying to play her right now, I can't shake the feeling that Gabi's going to get hurt in the end. And that's unfair because she been incredibly gracious during this whole thing.

Bottom line: hurry up, Jarlena! These kids need saving and a shrink!

Back on the mainland, my MVP of the week was Steve! First, he managed not to reach across the table and strangle Jade when she once again complained that he and Kayla so rudely stopped paying all of her expenses while she is busy doing nothing. Second, his touching scenes with Adrienne never disappoint. Third, he welcomed back Anjelica Deveraux! We know she's a big deal because she got custody of the blue office on her very first day!

Welcome to DAYS, Morgan Fairchild! I'm excited to see what she does with the role. Most of the scenes with Steve were background explanation. Angelica was married to Jack's serial killer adoptive father and raised Jack. She also used to tango with Justin and blames Adrienne and those magical soul mate powers for ruining things with the grand dimpled one. That's fair. I'd be mad if I lost Justin too.

Anyway, she's out for revenge against all things Adrienne, and I am all kinds of here for that. This storyline looks like it will heavily feature Adrienne and Justin, with a possible side of Anne, Lucas, Jennifer, and Steve! I'll sign up for that!

Another thing I'll take more of? Hope and Claire scenes! They had one of the most charming talks I've seen in a while. I adore that she calls Hope "Gran" just like Hope did with Alice. I get Claire's reasoning for not feeling like she belongs in Salem. The gal did grow up traveling the world. But Hope was right. There's a difference between fame vs. passion for an art. Claire needed that reminder.

Side note: who's in charge of Basic Black now that Sonny's the CEO of Titan? I think Claire would do great there as an intern -- styling photo shoots, working on parties, and bossing around vendors! Plus, she's a Kiriakis and a Black! Get this gal on board!

Sorry, I digress. Back to Claire today. Mercifully, the whole sex tape thing ended pretty quickly. That idea, as Claire repeatedly told Jade, was a bunch of nonsense. And because Claire had shut Jade down multiple times, I didn't have a lot of sympathy for Jade's "I thought I was helping!" malarkey.

On one hand, Jade's in a tough spot as a character. People not connected to core families have a hard time getting traction. (They can't all be Marlenas and Nicoles!) But because she's not a very firm-footed character, she should not be driving so much storyline. I don't like the concessions the other characters around her have to make just to make her character work.

For example, Tripp was a pretty street-smart kid. That is, until they dumbed him down to fit with Jade. And that's a loooonnnngg way down to go. The fact that Tripp can't smell the bunny boiling when she's around makes me very nervous for him. Though Joey can't see that buying her ice cream is basically a proposal to Jade. There must be something in the Johnson DNA.

In happier news, thanks to a return from the fabulous Nancy, Chloe is starting to come around! It's funny, I wasn't a huge Nancy fan when she was on full-time. But she is one of my all-time favorite DAYS guest stars. She never makes a boring visit, that's for sure! And she came to tell Chloe all the truths this time! Nancy does know what it's like for a genetic bond with her child to last for years. Chloe was a teenager when Nancy found her.

Hopefully Chloe will listen. She took a big step last week when she testified on Nicole's behalf and kept Nicole out of jail. Good job, Chlomeister! That's the Chloe I recognize -- the same one who would donate bone marrow to Kate and offer to carry Nicole's kid in the first place. Chloe never has been a villain.

But Holly belongs with Nicole. I agree with Justin that Nicole shouldn't have pushed Chloe in that moment. But something needs to hurry this along. All this "my child" foolishness is not a good look on Chloe. And we need to see Nicole with her daughter before she leaves.

And that brings us to my Nicki. I'm glad she's not heading directly to jail. But this version of angry Nicole needs to die along with Daniel. Personally, I think it's the height of hypocrisy for Nicole to tell Brady that she's not even considering forgiving Eric. Sheesh, Nicole. It's a good thing for you that Brady has different forgiveness standards. Otherwise, your relationship wouldn't have gotten past "you tried to kill my grandfather" or "you stole my niece."

But, okay, for argument's sake, let's say that Eric deserves to rot for all eternity. Nicole still needs to find a way to forgive him in order to get herself in a better place. Right now, she should literally be happier than she's ever been in her whole life. She's free. The man who loves her just rose from the dead. And she's finally got her miracle baby! Yet she's letting the weight of her own anger crush her like a bad jacket. She needs to realize that forgiving Eric, or at least letting go of her own anger, would be good for her.

But there is hope! She almost managed to put together a nice sentence and aim it kinda, sorta in Eric's general direction! See, progress! Plus, thanks to the fine legal system in Salem, USA, Nicole is going to have to work with Eric again. I could not love this more if I tried. It feels strange for these two to be at odds, so the sooner they can be forced to fix it, the better. I hope this week was just the start of it!

What will that mean for their respective paramours? Hopefully a merciful end. Look, I like both Brady and Jennifer. But neither romantic pairing seems productive. Brady and Nicole's romance waters down their long-time friendship. There was something unique, pure, and dependable about it. But they now seem like another name on each other's long list of romances. It's all too regular for them.

As for Eric and Jennifer, the show seems to be pulling away from them, which is a good move. Love these characters as friends. Don't love them as anything more. They're at two different points in their lives.

All this makes me wish that Vincent Irrizary's Deimos was given a much different arc. He could have come back angry. But ultimately, Deimos should have been a good guy. He and Jennifer would have been a fantastic pair -- him a reluctant Kiriakis and her a reluctant Kiriakis acceptor.

I digress, but here's hoping that Jennifer has some of Abigail's powers to realize that the guy she's into isn't into just her.

I need to stop here and praise the beast that is Marci Miller for a minute. Her scenes with Melissa Reeves on Friday were spectacular. She does a great job of making me see Abigail's argument. I appreciate that Abigail just wants control over something. I don't think this is the right decision, but I love that Abigail is finally making decisions.

As for Jen, I adored her trying to talk some sense into Abigail. But I think I loved her more for realizing that at some point, you have to let people make their own decisions. I guess she's learned that if she can't make this kid un-fake her death, she can't make her do anything!

LOOSE ENDS: Oh, good. Another fake marriage. How original. I mean, I usually prefer three of the same storylines going on at once, but two is a good start! Sigh. Lauren Koslow and Thaao Phenglis are wonderful together. But, I don't want this to be a romance, or worse, a bitter romance, and ruin their fun banter.

I wonder what kind of baby gift I should get for Chad and Gabi. We all know what happens when Chad has sex outside!

Smarmy, nosy Hope hasn't ever been my favorite. Her questioning of Myron is the same. It seems like lazy police work. Hope is better than that.

Furthermore, I find it odd that Hope and Jen are so worried Dario is dirty that they're basically camped out with #TeamChad picket signs outside Abigail's house. It seems to me both fellas are gray characters who can justify doing illegal things in the name of protecting their families. I'm not touting one over the other. I just think it's odd that Jen and Hope are, especially considering how neither has been the biggest Chad fan in the past.

Jade asked Tripp why he hangs out with her. He gave her the "we're both loners" speech. It's never good when characters have to remind us why they're sharing scenes rather than them just having actual connection and chemistry we can observe.

Christopher Sean continues to shine in the jungle madness storyline. There's something solid about his regular performances that make the ones where he's crazy all the more effective.

I'm shocked at how fast the DiMera Enterprise board moves on to a new CEO. You'd think Stefano would have conditioned them to wait at least two months after an assumed death to see if it sticks or not.

HOT: Eileen Davidson is coming back to DAYS! Thank the soap gods! Her portrayal of a fantastically layered villain is legendary. And from a selfish side, DAYS is in dire need of a good villain. Xander's the only one who came close to filling Kristen's shoes since she left. But she's been very missed.

There's some foolishness floating around right now about who she'll play, so let me pick a side now, Ronnie. Eileen plays Kristen DiMera. Sure, she's good enough to play any role on that show. But Kristen is iconic. Teasing Eileen's return only to bait and switch us out with another role is kind of like when my dad told me that our "special dessert" after family dinner was pears.

Pears are delightful, sure. But when you say "special dessert," that means some sort of multiple chocolate situation. For those of you lost/hungry by this metaphor, Kristen is chocolate, and the pears are literally any other new role she would play. Don't give us pears.

NOT: Theo, buddy, you look super bad for not believing Claire. Let's just toss aside the fact that she was absolutely telling the truth. For argument's sake, let's assume Claire masterminded the whole thing. When you found out, you said, "Yup, I believe you're the type of person who would do this." If you've always had that type of opinion of her, big guy, then you should have walked the second she brought up condom shopping -- or at least have your big sis Lani teach you how to scan for recording devices. You're the only one responsible for your opinion. You not acting on it is all your fault. I'm glad she didn't accept your apology right away. You didn't just forget to bring her ketchup for her fries. You told her she was a bad person. You can't just unring that bell a few minutes later.

Can we all chat here? I'm over people casting Claire as the big, bad wolf. To date, the worst thing she did is not turn over the letter her best friend wrote to try to steal her boyfriend behind her back. (Something Ciara did on the advice of Julie -- who's always had her moral compass pointing north.) I do wish Claire had just confronted Ciara with that betrayal. But that letter never should have been written in the first place, and that's on Ciara -- not Claire.

I get it. It is super annoying when people don't give us their undivided attention in real life. I've wanted to chuck a few phones out of people's hands myself! But that needs to be put in perspective. Finding someone's personality annoying doesn't automatically mean they are a bad person. You have to look at people's actions.

Claire's been pretty ride-or-die when it comes to crunch time. She orchestrated Chase's kidnapping to avenge Ciara. Then she went to jail for getting revenge on that jerk who made fun of Theo. She also tossed Wyatt out on his rear when she heard that he'd been lying to Ciara. In contrast, Jade made a secret sex tape of her friends. Theo kept a lie going for weeks about who Ciara's boyfriend was. Joey straight up killed another human being. But, yeah, she looks at her phone a lot, so she's totally morally bankrupt. That checks out, DAYS. Good work.

LINE OF THE WEEK: Andre: "DiMeras always have a supply of pre-nups on hand. Father married almost as many times as he died.

Kate: Mr. DiMera and I are getting married. We need you as a witness. Harold: Oh, I hope I catch the bouquet.

RANDOM THOUGHTS I hope Claire and Theo take a break. I'd also like to see Tripp around someone other than Jade. All aboard the Clipp ship!

Does Abe not have an office? He's the mayor! Certainly he has some time in the blue office.

I need for Tripp to have cocktails with Nicole and hear about his mom from her.

Remember when Chloe got a job as a singer at Club de Hernandez? Let's see that.

I liked Claire's song. That slower tune had a breathy, Norah Jones vibe.

Judge Duncan earned herself a stiff drink after that day!

If Paul wants to use that knife to trim up Sonny's hair, I wouldn't be opposed to it.

Gabi must have some Adonis blood in her, since she was able to carry Sonny back to camp on her bad ankle. Get it, Wonder Woman.

Wait, has there always been a bell in the DiMera living room?

Until Chad signs those papers, Abigail is a DiMera. Just sayin'.

Hey, Jade. Feel free to go hang out more with those "friends" who send you creepy pictures -- and leave the Johnson men alone.

That yogurt shop must have some high standards. They didn't hire Theo either!

I forgot how much Chloe's babysitting attire cracked me up. That woman parents in skin-tight skirts and heels. Um, my parenting is more yoga pants and sweatshirts.

Maybe Jennifer and Nancy can finally bond over daughters who make bonehead decisions.

Pale, blond-haired Parker must have gotten all the recessive genes from his grandmothers. He looks nothing like Daniel or Chloe.

What are your thoughts on ? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- so drop your comments in the Comments section below, tweet about it on Twitter, share it on Facebook, or chat about it on our Message Boards.