D.I.V.O.R.C.E.

For the Week of September 18, 2006
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This past week, Billie finally came clean to Hope about her setting it up so Hope would find Bo in bed with Billie. That was classic soap, and it was a nice, unexpected, pleasant surprise.

Okay, I'm just going to jump right into it. My favorite part of the whole entire week was Billie finally, finally, finally, coming clean to Hope about her setting it up so Hope would find Bo in bed with Billie. That was classic soap right there. A nice, unexpected but a completely pleasant surprise. Who the heck saw that coming (other than those of you like me that read all of the spoilers you can get your hands on)? And didn't you love Alice giving Patrick the business? He looked like he wanted to slap her but didn't want to slap Hope's 90+ year old grandmother. In front of Hope at least. I love the character of Hope, but she is just way too stubborn for me. She doesn't seem to want to hear anything that doesn't coincide with what she already thinks. Frankie tried to explain to her that Bo was hung up at the station but she didn't want to be bothered to listen. She doesn't want to divorce Bo anymore than she would like a bullet to the head but she is just letting her stubbornness carry her brain along for the ride. And of course there is Patrick whispering "Our baby. Our baby," in her ear constantly. I'm glad Alice told him to enjoy the last night he would ever spend with Hope, even though he didn't even make it that far.

Which brings me to my next subject. So all the evidence points to Patrick and he just so happens to have all of the necessary evidence wrapped up in a convenient towel in a convenient coat closet. Why does that make me think "Set Up?" It just can't possibly be that easy. And of course with Bo being the one to make the arrest, who is really going to believe it? Now I personally would love it if Patrick is the one who set all of this up so he could be with Hope and from here on out really shows how crazy he actually is. But the deal breaker here for me is that I don't think he would intentionally hurt his sister by switching the embryo's on her. Unless he was trying to score points with Hope by making Shawn happy, but there would be no way for him to take credit. Oh, the confusion.

Max dumping Chelsea was a bucket of fun for me. And probably anyone else that thinks it is creepy for him to be dating his niece, adopted or not. Now they just need to give him a love interest that is not fifty percent Brady and he will be in good shape. I loved when Billie accidentally spilled the beans about the emails that Chelsea forged. Max looked so mad I thought smoke would begin rising from his person. Loved it. Except for the moony eyes Stephanie kept fluttering at him. Please crush on someone that is not your mom's brother. Please.

I still love Kayla and Steve, but I totally get Steve's point. I am personally tired of Kayla asking him if he remembers anything, every five minutes. I am sure that if he remembered something he would tell you! And does anyone else notice that the ladies that Steve is attracted to besides Kayla are physically the opposite of her. What's-her-face from Cincinnati and Billie are both brown eyed brunettes, which is about as far away from blond blue eyed Kayla as you can possibly get. But there is something I don't understand about last week's shows. When Kayla and Bo found Billie and Steve dancing in the bar, they lost their minds like Billie and Steve were humping in the middle of the dance floor. When the Brady siblings showed up they weren't even kissing or really dancing all that close, but from Kayla's reaction you would think she found Steve in bed with a crack-addled prostitute. Jeez, calm down. You just tried to feed him a meal with a bunch of frou-frou stuff that he doesn't remember, of course he's at the town dive where he feels comfortable. But just for the record, no I don't enjoy Billie and Steve together. Especially not kissing.

So Jack and Jennifer were kidnapped. Again. YAWN. I'm sorry I just rolled my eyes so hard I nearly fell asleep. I may be in a minority here, but I can't and never have been able to stand Jack and Jennifer. Jack is so annoying and impulsive and drags Jennifer along with him (I know she followed him this time, but what was she supposed to do? Two weeks ago he was a dead man walking). For any of you out there that really enjoyed this week's ha-ha funny caper, bless you guys. Because I hated every minute of it, from Deep Throat II (which is the stupidest thing I have ever heard) to Deliverance: The Sequel. I have always wished that Jennifer would dump Jack but we all know that will never happen, even though he is a cowardly, family abandoning cartoon character. But hey, that's just my opinion.

And finally to Chelsea. Still can't stand her, but boy is that actress good! She acted exactly how someone on Ecstasy would act. Did you notice how she kept petting E.J.? But back to the character. Okay, you are already on probation for killing your brother by accident, you are being accused of tampering with hospital records and your boyfriend breaks up with you, so what do you do? Score some illegal drugs and end up passed out on a stairway at the pier! I know that's what I do when I have a bad day (just kidding). It was nice of E.J. to look out for her, but I wonder what his real angle is, because he is just a little too good to be true. Sigh.

So, scoopers, do you think that Lexie and Sexy Tek are really, really over? Do you think Abe might trick himself into loving Lexie again? Do you think Hope will come off of it already and forgive Bo? Will Shawn be nicer to Chelsea when and if he finds out that she was right about Claire? And where the heck is Will Roberts? Who has him and did they finally cut off all that wookie hair?

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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