Baby switches, race cars, and fire!

Melissa
Baby switches, race cars, and fire!
Baby switches, race cars, and fire!

Carrie and Lucas almost barbequed themselves, but it's a good thing Austin watches everything they do like a hawk so he, Sami, and E.J. could get them out just in the nick of time.

While it is definitely not uncommon for our favorite residents of Salem to have their trials, tribulations, and good old fashioned drama, is it just me or is there just a blanket of assorted pain draped over pretty much everybody this week?

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Poor Bo is having a natural fit because Hope's baby belongs to Patrick. Now for some reason, with the glove lurking about, causing chaos, I just can't believe it. I wonder if Billie will stop with the noble martyr act and take advantage of the situation or if Kate is pulling some strings behind this somehow. Logically, the baby is most likely Patrick's because if memory serves me she and Bo haven't been together in about seven or eight months, but time is really different in Salem. January was about three days long and then it was Valentine's Day, so you never know. But how come no one has discussed exactly how weird it is for Hope to be having a baby with her daughter-in-law's brother? Does anybody else find that creepy?

Hey folks, if you are going to have a bunch of candles in a room that has a lot of gauzy curtains, um you might want to blow them out before you fall into your wedding night love coma. Carrie and Lucas almost barbequed themselves, but it's a good thing Austin watches everything they do like a hawk so he, Sami and EJ could get them out just in the nick of time. It looks like Carrie finally had a pregnancy test given by a doctor (hasn't she been pregnant since April?) and it looks from Lexie's very dramatic reaction to Carrie's test results that she might not be pregnant after all. This should be very interesting considering Austin just volunteered Sami's spare bedroom so they can all be one big happy family. All it's going to take is one accidental on purpose bump into Austin in a towel and the little marriage vows of Carrie and Lucas's will be out the window. And why oh why the one time in her whole life that Sami is actually going to tell Austin the truth can't he find five minutes for her. But of course he had all the time in the world to stalk Carrie over at Lucas's apartment. Ugh, this whole thing is getting on my nerves. I truly enjoyed Carrie saying that maybe Sami was right about her being a spoiled brat and wanting everything her way. It was the most true thing she has said in months.

Shawn is really smooth these days isn't he? He just keeps making all these little slips about Belle being the love of his life and he loves Belle and he really expects Philip and Mimi to believe his backpedaling "What I really meant was..." crap. If Mimi was really smart she would just cut her losses and move on. I'm really glad she finally let Shawn have it after Philip's accident, speaking of which, while it was a really dumb idea for him to take out Max's car, I think his freak out beforehand was fairly justified. You would have to be a complete idiot not to notice that Shawn and Belle are still in love and secretly thrilled about that little hospital mix-up. My favorite part is how Shawn keeps looking at Mimi like she's crazy because she doesn't believe his declarations of love to her. I wonder how he and Belle are going to get out of Mimi overhearing that Belle wants nothing more than Shawn's baby. Just remember Mimi, she's not pregnant in the face. You can totally punch her in the face. It's fine.

Chelsea sucks. I mean really, I just can't stand this character. Take Sami for instance, she's bad, but you still like her most of the time. She is spoiled and self-centered but she has some redeeming qualities. Chelsea ran her little brother over with their father's very large SUV, managed to skate away with only community service thanks to her scheming grandmother, and what, she's just too cool to do her "boring" community service? I hate her. Now she is leading Max to believe that she wants to be exclusive with him because she doesn't want Stephanie to have him. And the crossing her fingers behind her back and turning off Max's phone so Stephanie couldn't talk to him. Super mature. Abby actually was right when she told her that what she had to say sucked. Tell it little sister. So Frankie has discovered through the wonder of the internet that there just may in fact be some miraculous cure for Jack's unnamed yet fatal disease. I guess Lexie was too busy sexing it up with Tek to do any real research on Jack's condition. Where exactly did she get her medical degree? A bag of Funyon's? Frankie is a lawyer for goodness sake and he found that research lab thingy in like, what, fifteen minutes? We all know if Jack lives Jen and Frankie are pretty much null and void, kind of like the legality of their marriage. So I'll just be looking for Frankie and Billie to hook up since she is about the only one he is not related to in the right age range. Unless he plays the Max "I'm adopted and we don't share any blood so it's perfectly okay to date my nieces" card. Then that opens a world of possibilities.

Okay folks, that's all for now. I don't know if there is something wrong with my email link, but I haven't gotten any feedback so I don't know if you guys hate me, or think I'm funny, but please feel free to email me with your thoughts so I can make my columns even better. Have a great week!

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