Il Giar-dead-o

Wanted: hospitality workers to replace two deceased employees. Head server with criminal record longer than the 405 freeway in custody. Owner's daughter envisions double order of married man. Order apps or dirt naps with Two Scoops' Mike!

Has your week been bold and beautiful? Did your dead waiter end up as water cooler conversation? Did you end up being the butt in a "Pin the Tail on the Murderer" game? Did you have a long-awaited meet cute with someone you'd already met? These and more situations faced the Forrester-Logan-Spencer-Finnegan-Nozawa clan this week!

The Il Giardino menu is to die for, Scoopers! Deacon may want to reopen his old club, the Lair, and ditch his pizzeria, for the simple reason that bodies dead and near-dead keep decorating the place. All eyes focused on Sheila, the one person who couldn't have offed Tom and Hollis, while Hope's eyes got strained from focusing on Finn, then Thomas, then Finn again. And that's only the appetizer. Let's Scoop about it!

The co-CEO office at Forrester Creations periodically goes from design mecca to Coffee Klatsch Central, and that's what happened for basically three episodes this week as our characters, most without storylines, gathered to talk about dear, departed Hollis. Considering Brooke was the only one who had any real interaction with him on their one and only date, which she correctly mentioned, the mourning was meh.

I kinda needed all that coffee to deal with these people in deep discussion about the death of a virtual stranger. Aren't there gowns to be beaded? Buyers to meet? Orders to fill? Instead, everyone got their fill by gossiping and casting themselves as detectives, hypothesizing how Hollis could have died. I know everybody needs their scenes, but I wish they'd get their own stories to go with them.

The Forresters and Logans weren't the only ones with Hollis on their minds. At Casa Spencer, Bill noted Poppy's distraction and asked pointedly, "You'd tell me if something was going on, wouldn't you?" Well, of course, she wouldn't; this is a soap! Then Luna arrived, all boo-hoo about how she'd never see her friend Hollis again. Um, when did she see her friend Hollis in the first place? When he was taking her orders?

There was a lot of coitus interruptus going on, as well. First, Bill and Poppy's kissy-poo got shuttered because of Hollis' death news, then Finn and Steffy lost their groove with a text from Li, who was conducting an autopsy on the lifeless server. Can any doctor just go in and cut people up? Again, soap -- hey, our "world-renowned psychiatrist" was an oncologist when she first showed up in 1990. Now Li's a medical examiner!

Li had a private moment with the stiff Hollis (too bad that couldn't have been when he was alive; maybe she'd have mellowed out), telling the corpse, "I'm sorry for what happened to you." Was Li apologizing because she had no choice but to snuff him out? No further clues were dropped, as Finn came in and got the news that Hollis had died from the same drug, administered in the same amount, as Tom did.

Not that Li could concentrate, because her phone kept buzzing; Li informed Finn that that pesky Jack kept texting her. Hmm. Well, with cadavers turning up at Il Giardino faster than its pizza orders, Li concluded that only one person could have iced the two men. Sheila! Li reiterated this to Poppy, who inexplicably stopped by the morgue, with Bill and Luna not even knowing where "Penelope" had disappeared to.

After Poppy left, Steffy was the next to party with Hollis, and naturally, Steffy agreed with Li's presumption that Sheila was picking off employees at the IG. Even Finn had to concede that his biomom looked hella suspicious. He rightly warned his wife and his adopt-o-mom that their idea to confront Sheila was a bad one, but Finn has a nasty habit of having strong women in his life who walk all over him. Say he doesn't.

This all circles 'round to everyone in B&B's version of Los Angeles painting a target on Sheila's back. All right, I'll grant you -- with Sheila's rap sheet, it's hard not to. But clearly, these folks haven't been paying attention. Sheila only becomes murderous -- or attempted murderous -- when her back is up against the wall. And lots of the people who drop dead at her feet do so by accident, starting on Y&R.

The only gripe Sheila had with Tom was that he Googled her, and they had made peace by the time of Tom's performance. She was even happily singing along to his song! And Hollis? Sheila had no gripe with him. Sure, she caught him rummaging through Tom's backpack, but as Sheila herself reminded us this week, Tom saved Sheila's life. Whatever Hollis stumbled upon was of no threat to Sheila.

At the apartment above the murder scene restaurant, Sheila consoled Deacon, who was sad to lose his two friends. It was actually quite poignant for Deacon to admit that he hadn't had many such companions in his life. It's true. All the way back from his early days, he was a lone wolf, except for his parade of ladies. No bros to hang with. Deacon wanted to know why his pals all had toe tags!

Deputy Chief Hot Dog...er, Baker, showed up at the Sharpes', this time sans Oscar Meyer. With two carcasses among the carne pizzaiola, Baker had an investigation on his hands. Deacon and Sheila both cooperated with the law, but then Li, Steffy, and Finn all arrived and slapped toy sheriff's badges on their chests, with the ladies aiming perfectly manicured fingers at Sheila, natch.

Sheila admitted that she had seen Hollis with Tom's backpack yet had told him to get rid of it, as she was afraid the six-feet-under singer had been carrying drugs around, and she didn't want them in the restaurant. All but Deacon cried foul when Sheila further revealed that she hadn't been with Deacon the entire night that Hollis had died, leaving a mysterious gap in her alibi.

That was enough for Baker and his wannabe constables to find any book available to throw at Sheila, who desperately urged Finn to stand up for her. In an unexpected turn, the usual lapdog doctor actually told Baker to take his biomom away! This despite Deacon accurately noting that there was absolutely no proof of Sheila's involvement, just "baseless accusations." Not that that stopped Baker, and Sheila was read her rights!

In 2018, everyone thought that Sheila had punched a bullet through Bill, as well, except back then, she wasn't jailed on suspicion of it. Again, Sheila is a red herring because of her bloody history. I admit, I'm having trouble nailing the culprit. It's not Sheila, and it can't be the concert-going Justin, either -- not unless he was trying to get back into Bill's good graces by dispatching Tom and Hollis because they knew something about Luna's paternity that affected Bill.

That paternity is what we're talking about here, isn't it? Tom died soon after promising Poppy he would tell Luna that he was Luna's father. Then Hollis finds some old letters in Tom's backpack, and Hollis beefs it. This clearly has something to do with Luna, and Sheila has absolutely zero ties to the girl or who fathered her. My money says the someone who poisons people as a hobby is growing right out of Luna's family tree.

Could be Jack, who keeps contacting Li, either doing her bidding or trying to keep people from finding out that Luna's real dad is his truly -- or perhaps Finn. Remember, Poppy stayed with the Finnegans the year before Luna was born, and Finn is an adoptee. Maybe Poppy special minted the then probably horny teenager, and Jack is frantic to prevent the scandal of the encounter's discovery?

We don't know much about Jack; he doesn't seem like a murderer, but you never know. Now, Li -- she claims to hate Sheila, but the doctor has proven to be just as unbalanced as her nemesis. Even Sheila's never stolen a "corpse" out of a morgue and nursed it back to health. The only person Li loathes more is "Penelope," and certainly Li wouldn't want it coming out that Jack shagged her sister.

Multiply that by a hundred for anyone finding out Finn fathered Luna! The hint of that biological tie was dropped several months ago, and it would explain Li's almost unnatural revulsion toward Poppy. All this said, if Tom was really Luna's father, what would Li or Jack have to gain by killing him? That spotlight would fall on Poppy, who we also know very little about.

Would Poppy rather live in the lap of luxury with Bill as Luna's daddy, or would she be willing to let a homeless failure of a singer fill that role? Poppy seems too nice, but then, it's always the quiet ones. I rather like that it's not immediately obvious who killed these men. 'Cuz it ain't often anymore we get a mystery we can really sink our teeth into on this show. The only thing I know for sure is that Sheila is innocent.

Steffy and Finn rock a strange love life. She was all glad that Finn stood up for her and their family (how? By implicating Sheila in a crime unrelated to them?), and from there on, the tonsil hockey was real. They came up for air by talking about Sheila and Deacon, which is a strange aphrodisiac. But hey, it's their kink. Hayes and Kelly were off at sleepovers, so sexy time commenced at the cliff house.

Meanwhile, at Forrester, Ridge and Brooke were still talking about Sheila. When the conversation finally shifted, it shifted to Finn. Ridge was glad that Finn had done right by Steffy and the kids by sending Sheila up the river. Hope became animated. I mean, Steffy was very lucky to be married to a man like Finn! Good thing Ridge had a call with the mayor so he couldn't see Brooke totally gagging like the Valley Girl she is.

Like, fer sure, Hope asked her mom when Brooke reminded Hope that Finn was married, was Finn, like, totally not allowed to have friends? After all, Finn had been right that perhaps Hope and Thomas hadn't been meant to be, especially with Thomas once again gone. Hold the phone, both landline and smart. Thomas is gone? Didn't he ask Grampy Eric if he could marry Paris at the Forrester compound?

What happened to that wedding? Thomas just took Paris back to Paris -- after proposing to Hope again; what was that, a test? -- despite everyone planning a wedding they didn't bother with? I'd say that was a dropped ball, but only if that ball is the size of a meteorite and it just plunged into the earth leaving a gigantic crater. What was the point?

Anyway, the less stepsibling love, the better -- for me, anyway, so let's move on. As Finn was getting some sweet, sweet lovin' from Steffy, Hope was telling Brooke that if Finn had an identical twin brother, she wouldn't complain. Wouldn't that be a kick? Here he comes -- Flynn Finnegan! He's a bad boy who only has eyes for Hope, plus he's Luna's father, leaving Finn in the clear! Two birds with one soapy stone.

A new day dawned, but Steffy acted the way she had for hundreds of days before -- being an entitled bitch. How one-note has this character become? I want to like her spunk, but all she does is tell people what to do. In this case, Hope was the recipient of freshly repeated marching orders. Despite Hope having gotten into Finn's head about a possibly redeemed Sheila, Finn had prevailed. Hope was to stop interfering!

Hope tried to sidestep Steffy's umpteenth diatribe, but Steffy pulled nonexistent rank like it was 2010. Steffy was in charge. Not Hope. And not Brooke! Oh, yeah...right! Brooke became co-CEO of Forrester alongside Steffy! I'd forgotten, since they're never seen working together and/or having conflicts over their different styles of approaching duties.

Hope warned Steffy that, "one of these days," someone might cut Steffy down to size. "You?" Steffy retorted haughtily, as if to say, "You and what army?" But Steffy was about to experience Brooke and Ridge being all that they could be. Across the hall, a frisky Ridge informed his Logan that he had been designing lingerie for the rebooted Brooke's Bedroom line.

Had Ridge ever created for that collection before? It just struck me as odd. Brooke, as she did in 2013, wondered if she was past the prime necessary to strut around in stilettos. But Ridge assured his over-55 not-bride that she was up to the task and busted a move. Mind you, Bridge had just talked about Sheila. I told you these people are getting turned on by purring about the woman they love to hate!

I'll give Bridge credit -- at least this time, they locked the door. Then, something happened I don't ever recall seeing in 36 years of following these exploits...Steffy, needing to access the design office for whatever reason, grabbed a key and let herself in! And got an eyeful of her dad with his paramour! Steffy got what she deserved on that one. Does a locked door mean nothing? She could have knocked!

"Great, another Logan," Steffy scoffed. I am so over Steffy and her anti-Logan bull. If she had always been that way, or only just started, I could almost understand. But she got past that rhetoric years ago, with her and Hope gushing over their "blended family" any number of times. For Steffy to regress is only making her that much more unlikeable, and Steffy's continual causticity is such a turn-off. Major buzzkill!

Over at the hospital, Liam came looking for a storyline -- er, had just wrapped up his physical (pictures or it didn't happen) -- and wanted to pop in on Finn to thank him for doing the right thing about Sheila. Finn relayed that, as a result of having done so, his marriage to Steffy had never been stronger. A message? Liam asked. Oh, yes, Finn confirmed. Finn advised Liam to stop sniffing around his ex. Don't interfere!

Oh, my lanta, now Finn is parroting Steffy's directives. Will he inevitably start insisting to everyone with ears that he's right, like Steffy? It doesn't matter, for, when next we saw Finn, he was wandering around backstage at Forrester. Why, I don't know. But didn't his eyeballs pop when he caught sight of Hope in lingerie and a slinky robe? She must have been trying on some of the new Brooke's Bedroom merch. Why, I don't know.

Flustered, Finn said he had only been looking for a quiet place to take his doctoring call. Uh-huh. This scenario was clearly concocted so Finn would see Hope in her Hope for the Boudoir attire. As Finn tried to roll his tongue back into his head, Hope remembered the prediction she had made to Steffy that someday, Steffy would get hers. And it was that that spurred Hope to finally admit her attraction to Finn!

Hope realized Finn was married and everything and all. "Can't a girl dream?" Hope cooed. Is Hope finally going full SFTV? And all to get revenge on Steffy, who keeps getting up in her grill? I personally am not sure I want to see Hope fully channeling Old Brooke, the opposite end of Hope's once-virginal spectrum. I also don't really want to see Finn cheat. But Steffy...has she been enough of an ogress that she might deserve it? Well...yes!

What's stirring your appetites, Scoopers? Would you rather see characters off doing their own thing instead of talking about the things that other characters are doing? Was it odd that people who had nothing to do with Hollis were sad that he was gone? Who do you think killed Hollis and Tom -- and is the resulting mystery intriguing to you or not? Does Steffy need to be taken down a few pegs? And do you think Hope is consciously working to accomplish that by seducing Finn? Place an order in the Soap Central message boards, or simply click here to submit feedback!

All this talk about food is making me hungry -- though I think I'll try DoorDash instead of going to Il Giardino. I hear their specials really knock 'em dead! Too soon? Speaking of soon, it will be that when I return to you, so, in the meantime, keep watching, be alert, and most of all, be bold!

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