It's a trap!

Cupid doesn't lie, but he does manipulate his parents with the latest impersonation app. Douglas out-parent-trapped Beth, but here's why the poor boy is the one being dupped. Next, after two affairs turned a corner on Friday's show, find out what Sheacon's got that Thope has not. In B&B shockers, Deacon out-Billed Bill, and the real deadly mama in Finn's life might not be who you think. Plus, people are choosing sides, but why can't everyone just "design along?" Let's scoop!

After a long sojourn at the sleepaway camp, Douglas Forrester returned in time to remind us of how handsome and cunning he is and that there is no getting away from the parent-trapping on The Bold and the Beautiful. Douglas has a lot of ground to recapture because Beth almost won the parent war with her mermaid party cuteness. Not to be "out-cuted," Douglas sprang his own parent trap right under Beth's nose, but little does he know, his parents already have a relationship that his mom is quite happy with, and she doesn't want it to change.

It's time for little Richie-Rich Douglas to get his own car service if he's grown enough to set his own appointments. Ben's mom and Donna aren't his chauffeurs, and I don't know that I'm a fan of Douglas getting adults to do things for him without his parents' permission. I'm also not a fan of Douglas lying to adults about where he needs to go; for example, he told Donna he left homework at Thomas' house in order to sneak in there. While I'm at it, what's he doing burning candles alone and impersonating people on apps again?

I can only assume that, because Hope and Thomas had their phones, Douglas found a new app that clones phone numbers. How else did he pull off texting his parents under each other's contact information? Thomas high-fived Douglas for his romantic efforts, but I would have preferred Thomas give the child a stern lecture about manipulating people with apps again and about playing with fire. And I don't mean just the candles.

Thomas already knows that Hope isn't in love with him and has rules and boundaries. Should he really set his child up for disappointment by accepting Douglas' helping hand in romance? Gosh, it's gotta be pretty bad if Douglas thinks he can romance his mom better than his dad, but I guess Thomas did prove he sucks by striking out every single time with Hope. If Douglas strikes out, too, this time, I wouldn't be surprised if he sets Liam up to supposedly babysit him without contacting Liam and then calling CPS on Liam for not showing up. You know, just to help things along a bit.

And what about Hope? If she knows she only wants sex from Thomas, does she not worry that she's stringing Douglas along if she plays into his parent-trap date? I feel sorry for Douglas for trying so hard and being so hopeful when, little does he know, his parents might have already gone as far as they'll go. I think that because Douglas is a child who has been manipulated so much for the sake of his father's love life, Hope owes it to Douglas to shut the parent trap down if she's only interested in worship sessions and sex with his father. It's time for Hope to put her family's needs over her libido, and contrary to Thomas' belief, she only has one family: herself, Douglas, and Beth.

Two secret affairs came to a fork in the road last week, and the fallout from each shows exactly what sets them apart. Although Deacon and Sheila broke up, the affair became a real romance while the one between Thomas and Hope seemed to take a turn for the self-indulgent. While Deacon was willing to sacrifice his relationship for the sake of his daughter, Hope reveled in her carnal relationship with Thomas, even while knowing he and their son deserve better.

First, let me interject that Hope would have no right to judge Deacon for falling in love with Sheila after Hope fell into lust with Thomas. Hope commended Douglas this week on his ability to forgive Thomas, and Hope claimed that she's done the same. So, it would stand to reason that she'd champion Deacon's belief in Sheila, who has actually been criminally clean for longer than the CPS-calling Thomas. Of course, Hope is nothing if not hypocritical, which is why she thought it was so adorable when Douglas was pleading with her to let Thomas be second in her heart, a position she refused to assume herself while with Liam.

It speaks volumes that Deacon cut Sheila loose for Hope's sake, but so far, Hope isn't considering the damage her sex-only relationship could do to her own children. Heck, Hope isn't considering much of anything, really. She smirks like a kid when her mother catches her having sex at work and berates her mother about her timing, but then she pops up over at Deacon's house, rattling his doorknob, not respecting the fact that he could be getting busy, too. I'd say Deacon's locked door will no longer perplex Hope, but now that Sheila knows what Deacon did on her behalf, it might be "hello, Daddy" all over again.

What makes Sheacon soapy for me is that, for as "crazy" as Deacon and Sheila are together, their relationship is sane, and it grounds them. It seems to be growing into something more. He puts on the brakes, but it's because of reasons outside of himself. If Deacon could have his way, he'd live with Sheila out in the open. With Hope and Thomas, on the other hand, Hope seems to stare at him with a resting-lust face while he says all the dreamy things to her women really want to hear from a hunk like him. It doesn't seem to connect for her because she isn't turned on by his talk of family and togetherness. She's turned on by his worship and obsession. She's turned on by the belief that he wants only her. And it doesn't seem to bother her that Thomas is obviously holding out for more. That, to me, makes Thope cringy, and it makes me pity Thomas.

So, when a man truly loves a woman, does he set her free like Deacon did or hold on to her, waiting her out and letting their child pressure her into happily ever after?

When Judge Evan Scott showed back up on the proverbial docket, I was a little worried. No matter how many characters want Sheila in jail, she got out fair and square, according to Carter, and I was not in the mood to revisit Sheila's vacated sentence. After Evan and Deacon reminisced like the old buddies they were (thanks for the historical throwback to the Liar, a club Deacon once managed/owned), Evan remarked that Deacon must really care for Sheila to go to bat for a woman with her criminal record. So, what exactly did Deacon do?

Evan vaguely said Deacon had called in a favor and asked Evan to make sure "all the right motions were filed" by the attorneys. Until we know more, to me, that simply means Deacon asked Evan to do his job. The last I checked, defendants are innocent until proven guilty in a court of law, and it's the judge's job to make sure the process is fair. In doing so, I would think the judge should make sure all the proper motions were filed, namely the motion to dismiss that lame trap Ridge and Bill sprung on Sheila!

I can't wait to see the looks on Ridge and Bill's faces upon learning that the former convict outwitted, outplayed, and outsmarted them. What Deacon and Evan have joined together, may no man or woman put asunder. I don't know what is sweeter -- the fact that the con man won legally, it seems, or that he did it for the girl. Insert swoon emoji.

Of course, legal or not, no Forrester, Logan, Spencer, or Finnegan will ever be grateful that Deacon helped Sheila be free. In fact, I know one Finnegan who is itching to rid them of Sheila legally or illegally, and it makes me wonder which of Finn's mothers is worse -- the one who accidentally shot him or the one who orders him to develop the conscience of a killer himself.

Well, damn, Li! Put a knife in Finn's hand, a cloth bag over his head with one cut-out eye hole, slap some overalls on him, and set him loose to take care of that pesky mother who wants to take the love in his heart reserved for you. But I've got to warn Li that if she keeps pushing her son to check his conscience at the door, she just might wind up unleashing the Sheila within him.

While Sheila was with Deacon, talking about forgiveness and earning a place back in her son's life, Li was seething at Finn for not killing Sheila when he had the chance. He insisted that he had to uphold his oath, and Li murmured, "You're better than me." That got me to wondering. Just how bad is Li? I kind of get the feeling I don't want to know.

Li is still bitter about Jack's affair, and she verbally slapped Finn, incensed about him being born of Jack's betrayal. She even had Finn apologizing for his own conception. Dang, Li. Hold a grudge much? I understand Li's desire to get rid of Sheila, but I was thinking of something lighter and more fun, like maybe a paternity test scam, not murder. Before Li sends Finn out into the world to catch a life sentence, which would negate the point of getting rid of Sheila, could Li at least talk to Sheila mother to mother and see if Sheila has changed?

One last thing. Finn obviously doesn't have the stomach for it, Li, so if you want a job done right, you probably need to do it yourself. Just saying, Mommy Craziest.

Just when I was ready to write Thomas off as merely Hope's blow-up doll, Matthew Atkinson's performance with Joshua Hoffman (R.J.) reminded me of what Thomas is at heart -- a villain. It was when R.J. arrived at the office to pick up some things for Eric, and Thomas told R.J. that Eric's collection just didn't align with Thomas and Ridge's vision for the company. In that instant, R.J. became the hero, and Thomas every 80s villain in a teen movie from Biff Tannen (Back to the Future), to Rip (Less Than Zero), to Johnny Lawrence (Karate Kid). That one line from Thomas was enough to have me hooting and hollering, "Team Eric!" to the mountaintops!

Others are taking sides, too, and I soon realized that, in a rare moment in my viewership, Brooke and I would not be in alliance. When Brooke said it was time for Eric to put down the pencil and enjoy life, I swear I was rolling my eyes like Stephanie reincarnated. Donna snapped that Brooke just didn't think Eric could win. With the company now divided, and Eric and Ridge both claiming Logans as their inspirations, how can either of them lose? I smell a tie, don't you?

Meanwhile, Eric is hiding more than arthritis from Ridge. Eric suffers from tremors, too. Brooke expressed concern that Eric would go out of the fashion world with a whimper if this collection isn't the greatest thing he's ever done, and she wondered why he'd risk it when his reputation is already established. I hear what she's saying, but I just don't think Eric can lose. Even if he put out rhinestone garbage bag dresses. Why? Because he's Eric Forrester, that's why.

Eric asserted that he's ready, winner-take-all. I see it like this: R.J.'s got the brawn. Eric's got the brains. Let them make lots of money.

Next week, yet another mama bear is on the loose, and this time it's Taylor Hayes, kicking butts and taking names on her kids' behalf. First, Taylor has a tte--tte with Finn about Steffy and his family. Let's just hope that, unlike Brooke, Taylor is out of the "Liam phase" for her daughter and is able to give Finn some sound advice. At least these two can commiserate about how sorry each of them is for saving Sheila's life!

Next, Taylor will grace Brooke and Ridge with her presence, surely ready to rumble when she finds out Thomas is still playing Hope's yes boy. Matters worsen when Taylor finds out the pair has consummated the relationship. Please have her channel Berry Island storyline Taylor, who ran around screaming that the sky was falling for months after she witnessed Thomas kiss Brooke! I would love to see Krista Allen do scenes to Tylo's fuming level. Plus, there has to be a disease Taylor can diagnose Thomas with. What's it called when one's Oedipus complex transfers to the mother figure's daughter?

Deacon makes a life-changing decision. I'm guessing that means proposing marriage to Sheila. Either he's gonna propose, or maybe Eric will, since Eric is facing his new lot in life. If not Eric, someone is on tap to propose, and after Friday, it better not be Thomas. He just said he understood that Hope isn't ready yet.

That's it. I'm all scooped out, but let me know what your two scoops are about the week, and if you're on Team Eric or Team Ridge! Until we scoop again, stay bold and beautiful, baby!

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