A hard head equals a broken heart

What goes around comes around only because weak sauce women keep making the same mistakes, this week on B&B.

Imagine having all the back rubs you'd ever want. A man decides to bankroll you, and you didn't even ask for it. There's a broad shoulder to cry on at your beck and sob. It sounds like a dream, but Quinn, Sally, and Brooke should start looking some gift horses straight in the mouths before they wind up with the worst kind of hell -- relationship hell.

None of these women should be eager to find themselves back in the romantic swamps they just survived, but each one sets a course for the exact same relationship perils of their pasts. We can include Steffy, too. She's sucking up compliments from her father-in-law while Liam jets around with another woman. It's the same situation Steffy was in with Wyatt when Liam was saving Ivy. By the time Liam gets his head out of Sally's business, he might find his wife in bed, spooning his father.

Quinn has been there and done that when it comes to playing with the fire of a younger man Eric trusts, but she's about to learn the true meaning of insanity by doing it again with Mateo. Sally hasn't learned a thing about letting men bolster her dreams, and even worse this time, the new guy is married! Brooke is the worst of them all for having learned nothing from bouncing between Bill and Ridge for half a decade.

Those who don't learn from history are bound to repeat it. Here's the scoop on how the hurt that goes around comes back around ONLY because these ladies let it this week on B&B.

In case you missed it, Sally has no problem jetting herself all over California with Liam to meet his architects. It was just wishful thinking of hers that he'd have time to stop over in Cabo for free margaritas. No man has ever done for Sally what Liam has -- if by "what," you mean throwing his wife and father under the bus for her success.

Thomas ran a close second by renouncing his family business, but he loses to Liam for failing to misappropriate millions of his daddy's funds to fulfill Sally's dreams. Liam is a whining jackass who will inspire Sally only to leave her heart and business a mess because she learned absolutely nothing from Thomas sweeping her off her feet and dumping her on her butt for his true love.

Speaking of daddy, Bill is right next to Steffy under that bus while Brooke lets Ridge pet her because she regrets marrying a man who she already knew was capable of anything. How could she not know after watching him fake a reunion with Katie -- and have sex with her -- just to get his company back?

Brooke is back to the same routine of letting her ex be there for her as she keeps uttering, "This doesn't mean..." Who is Brooke kidding? Everyone knows what crying on the ex's shoulder means in Brooke's pinball-machine love life. Just ask R.J. and Katie, who keep asking if she's reuniting with Ridge even before she left Bill.

And then there's Quinn, cooing and moaning like a porn star while Mateo gives her a free massage. Just like with Ridge, she's concerned more with the physical feelings than Eric's feelings. She has no idea that Mateo is on a two-hundred-thousand-dollar retainer, payable when Sheila gets her hands on the Forrester matriarch's bank account. If Sheila has her way, this will be the most costly therapy Quinn has ever had.

Facedown, butt up. That's the way we like to rub!

Can we really blame Quinn for being like a moth to a flame burned by the younger man? Who in the world -- married, or single -- would forgo a free bed-top massage from Mateo? Like Quinn said, ditch the towel if it's in the way. Go for it, Mateo.

Eric wants to trust his wife, but because Quinn fell vulnerable to Ridge , Eric should have put his foot down about the Mateo rubdown. There have to be some homely, more experienced female therapists with magic fingers in Beverly Hills.

Rick learned his lesson from Ridge destroying Rick's previous marriage with kisses. When Maya expressed interest in a Mateo massage, Rick stomped out a spark that could have turned into a five-alarm fire in his marriage. He told her that no man massaged her but him. Maya, with her cute new bob hairstyle, said it was fine by her.

Eric warned Mateo about breaking Eric's trust, but it didn't stop Mateo from making the cross-eyed orgasm faces of a teenager when he was massaging Quinn later. If Quinn brushed against him on accident, he probably would have exploded.

Can you imagine the look on Katie's face if she was getting a telescope load of that? It would probably look exactly like Quinn's "the Mummy" scream face at the end of Friday's episode. I thought a million beetles might fall out of Quinn's mouth and swallow Katie whole for sexually desecrating the body of Quinn's precious son.

Hey, Quinn, you and Mateo are just as gross as Wyatt and Katie, just so you know. Watching the massage is tolerable, but must Quinn be so audible about it? Her behavior was dialed to porn-actress when she needed to be on the business-client channel. With the ivory-handled gun still in the house, she'd better start biting on a pillow before Eric hears her through the vents and rushes in to personally pierce Mateo's buttocks.

Mateo is attracted to Quinn, and her moaning turns him on. Arousing one's therapist has to be the worst fear of a client, but Quinn just lies there, exhibiting the same naivet she exhibited with Ridge in San Francisco when she believed he was honestly starting to treat her like a real person instead of stringing her along to prove she was unfit for Eric.

It's the same trap with a different trapper and different bait. Will the marriage Grim Reaper's plan work? Will Mateo massage Quinn out of her marriage so that Sheila can wedge herself in?

For now, Quinn doesn't seem drawn to Mateo, as she was to Ridge. After walking in on Katie and Wyatt, Quinn shifted into mama bear mode. She might not have time for massages if she's at war with Katie. She might even decide to pay Mateo to massage Katie right out of Wyatt's life.

If only it was that easy for Steffy to get Sally out of Liam's life. The real problem is the reverse. Liam needs to get out of Sally's life. He is the one gassing their relationship so he can freebase in the addictive fumes of savior-hood. Should Steffy let Liam degrade her by flaunting yet another rescue infatuation?

Liam is not Sally's Superman

Liam loves saving women, but he proved that he really isn't Sally's Superman. He's just a weasel with a hero complex, begging her to let him rescue her so he can feel relevant. Bill doesn't know why Liam feels the need to do it when he has Wonder Wife Steffy, but I think Liam is doing it because he's married to Steffy.

Remember back when Liam and Hope were happy right before Steffy hit her head in the bathtub? Back then, Hope was independent. She'd just launched HFTF, and her career occupied most of her time. Co-CEO Steffy is at the same kind of pinnacle in her life, the kind where she doesn't "need" Liam. It means Liam needs another insecure woman to rescue in order to tear Steffy right back down to his level again.

Being needed and cultivating women makes Liam feel like a man, and Bill's evil deeds against Sally became the perfect excuse for Liam to have it back in his life now that Steffy has matured past him. This time, he had to pull his own underhanded trick to make it happen instead of lucking into a damsel being hounded by the press, a woman drowning in a bathtub, or a female in need of an immigration miracle.

As usual, the damsel is so thirsty that she heaps unending praise upon Liam. Sally is the underdog woman trying to keep his attention, so she doesn't point out the wrong in his extortion or his failure to bring his father to legitimate justice. In fact, the stunt caused the enamoured Sally to say she and Liam could have something together -- if he weren't married.

This is Liam's merry-go-round. Hope was lucky to get off that crazy carousel. When will Steffy?

In case you missed it, Bill and Steffy remained at a stalemate with Liam about healing the Spencer family. Steffy tried to hold it together, even when Liam told her once again that what he was doing with Sally wasn't Steffy's business. Suspecting Liam of having a thing for Sally, Bill is poised to use Steffy in the worst way to destroy Liam.

Liam has become a shark to blood in the water when it comes to power. He won't give it up, and he is overcompensating Sally for Bill's misdeeds by tens of millions of dollars. I haven't seen anyone get this much retribution for trickery since Brooke was awarded fifty-one percent of Forrester after Stephanie tried to trick her into signing away BeLieF.

Liam can call it business all he wants, but Liam getting off on saving Sally is every bit as slimy as Mateo getting off on massaging Quinn's back. Liam is a special kind of deplorable because he uses other people's actions as an excuse instead of owning up to his savior addiction. In Liam's view, it was Bill's fault that Liam had to prop up Steffy after the bathtub incident. It was Steffy's fault that Liam had to personally escort Ivy to a seat on the plane to Australia.

When Liam flew off with Sally, it was like the Australia flight incident all over again. Except this time, he did it on purpose, and he didn't even try to call Steffy to let her know where he was. All Steffy needed was a glass and wine, and she might have been spooning with Bill that evening, like she'd done with Wyatt on the past night in question.

Sally didn't need Liam to fly with her to that meeting any more than Ivy needed him buckling her in on her flight. You know who needs it? Liam needs it. He thrives on women telling him what a saint he is as they bask in all the personal attention he gives them. Liam, you're so wonderful. Liam, your lover is so lucky to have you. Liam, no one has ever done this for me.

It's fine if Liam wants to play rescue ranger, but he needs to understand that there's a reason Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent are single. A real hero won't have Mrs. Super Savior wondering where he is while he's out revamping burned-out buildings in a single flight. A real hero won't be in a relationship while distressed damsels hang from his muscles and kiss his squared jaw.

But there goes Liam, blushing and fake-stammering as the damsel swoons over his magnanimous deeds. Liam bashfully draws the line with Sally; however, he's cheating because he's getting off on helping Sally, and it has taken priority over his marriage.

You know it's a problem when Liam has to tell the other woman that he needs to straighten things out with his wife for doing what he did for the woman. I can't believe Steffy puts up with it after the fit she pitched over Wyatt and Quinn. Steffy moved out on Wyatt because his mother was in his life, but she's still living with Liam while he jets around with his brother-in-law's ex.

You think Liam will tell Steffy that Sally said there could be something between Liam and Sally if he wasn't inconveniently married? No, he won't. It's already at least a day since the trip, and we didn't even see him make up with Steffy after he got back to town the previous night.

No wonder Liam is always a groom and rarely a husband. He sucks at it. When Bill did wrong to Katie, he'd at least buy her a tiara! And Bill is right there to remind Steffy what a crappy end of the stick she's getting -- not that she ought to buy what he's selling. Brooke would be able to warn Steffy all about believing the words of another man during a marital crisis -- if Brooke can finally ever figure out for herself not to listen to it.

Unfortunately, Brooke keeps repeating the same mistakes with Bill and Ridge. She runs to one for consolation because the other hurt her, and then she ping-pongs right back the the first one when the consoling one hurts her. Brooke has gotten to the point where she won't even try to work out problems with her man. She just leaves.

Brooke might be justified in her negative reactions to Ridge and Bill's ways, but Brooke Logan-Forrester-Chambers-Jones-Marone-Forrester-Spencer might try a little more forgiveness and staying power in a relationship at this stage of her life.

Brooke would do anything for love, but she won't do that -- or that. No, not that, either.

It seems like forever ago that Brooke was waltzing on Australian sand, ready to marry Ridge -- until she saw him sucking face with Quinn. Brooke cried in Bill's arms over it, and as she did, she used the same tired line that she wasn't ready to be with him -- until she was. Now, she's crying on Ridge's shoulder because Bill let her down. This isn't getting just a little old?

Last year around this time, Brooke was set to marry Bill but didn't. In March, she almost married Ridge in Australia. She finally married Bill this past summer, but before the leaves can all fall, she is walking out on him to inevitably wind up back in Ridge's arms.

It makes me dizzy, but Brooke's choices are easy if she lets them be. She can put up with Ridge's cheating, put up with Bill's megalomania, find someone who won't disappoint her, or she can be by her-damn-self!

Brooke claims she's not ready to be with Ridge, and I doubt she's about to start dating again. If she can't stick it out for better or worse with Bill, she should stay away because worse is on the horizon as the Spencer war barrels toward its climax. Bill just yanked the sword necklace off Liam's neck and seemed itching to wipe the smirk off Liam's face when Liam acted smug about Brooke leaving Bill.

The storyline indicates that Bill intends to punish Liam for Brooke leaving. It hints that Bill might be looking to take a wife for a wife. Steffy is vulnerable to an affair, but I hold out hope that the real betrayal is in Bill convincing Steffy to erase Liam's proof against Bill.

Steffy knows what it is like to have a relative blackmail her; therefore, she should be amenable to leveling the field by erasing Liam's proof, something she convinced Wyatt to assist her in doing with Ivy's proof. Wyatt had been willing to help Steffy when he believed his fiance was wrong. Will Steffy stand by Bill the same way? If she does, will Liam stand by his marriage as Ivy remained with Wyatt, or will he run to Sally the way Brooke ran to Ridge?

Other happenings and tidbits of the week

This week was jammed with events, characters, and plot development. We saw just about every character, save the supporting Spectra gang. It's hard to dish on exciting occurrence or oddity, but here are a few other details from the week:

We got a glimpse of Nicole, who was in town visiting her parents. She conveyed that she and Zende love Paris, so all is well that's manipulated well in the Avant family.

Sheila's army of two shrank back to one when Charlie arrived at her hotel to tell her to get out of town. Sheila laughed in his face, but Charlie got the best laugh when he dissed her portrait for being pretty good -- as far as mugshots go.

In other blunders, Katie left her front door unlocked -- again. This time, her nemesis slithered in and discovered her in bed with Wyatt. Katie has no one to blame but herself for Quinn walking in on them. After Sheila, Bill, and Eric let themselves in, leaving the door unlocked was asking for Quinn to be next.

Maybe Katie likes the thrill of almost getting caught. She's lucky Will hasn't rolled up in there in one of his push cars and asked, "Uncle Wyatt, you are you laying on Mommy?" Or is that scene yet to come?

Reel Life Vs. Real Life

For anyone who missed some of Soap Central's Bold and Beautiful news, below are a few instances where reel life recently met real life:

Quinn threw her back out, and according to soapcentral.com news, Rene Sofer broke her ankle. Sofer originally thought she'd just sprained it, but it turned out to be broken. Mateo's working his magic on Quinn, who's twirling around her bedroom, free from her ailment, and Rena has a Godfrey angel by her side, helping her back on her feet.

Sheila is campaigning to be the next Eric Forrester, and her real-life counterpart, Kimberlin Brown, campaigns for Congress, according to soapcentral.com buzz. On her campaign site, you can get the lowdown on everything Brown-Pulzer stands for if you're looking for a new face in California's 36th district.

Sarah Brown played rape victim Agnes Jones on B&B. In our recent article, Brown opens up about being sexually assaulted by a director. On her Twitter feed, Sarah offered support to the growing voices of assault victims in Hollywood.

In a Look ahead, there's a whole new Thorne in Ridge's side

Fans are expecting Zende and Thomas recasts, but to our surprise, we're getting a new Thorne Forrester instead. Soap vet Ingo Rachmacher will pick up as Thorne where Winsor Harmon left off -- wherever that is. The last time we saw Thorne, he left Eric without a best man at his wedding. Thorne kind of just disappeared back to Paris without fanfare.

Viewers have mixed reactions about casting a new Thorne. We have until Thanksgiving to ponder it. B&B specializes in fast-flipping love affairs, and God only knows what the game of musical relationships will look like by the time Thorne moves back to town. Should Thorne be tossed into a love triangle, or should he have more important things to worry about -- like how his daughter really died?

Here are some thoughts our readers have about the recast:

I always liked Winsor, but Thorne got less respect than the late Rodney Dangerfield. I'd like to see new Thorne get aggressive, maybe team up with the Spectra bunch and give his dad and the rest of the Forrester clan some of the comeuppance they so richly deserve. -- Disappearingmoderate.

This is good news to me. I've wanted the other Forrester kids back in the forefront for years now. Thank you! -- Shawn Shambley

As far as I am concerned, Winsor Harmon would always be Thorne Forrester to me. Even though I watch B&B everyday, I am not happy about everything. I hate to see good or favorite actors/actresses go. -- Ernest

In other spoilers, Sheila sets out to befriend Pam. Pam has Sheila's number, and she warned Charlie about the criminal more than once. What in the name of unholy bakery can Shelia cook up to make Pam like her? Pam, don't eat or drink anything that you haven't made yourself because Sheila is out to put a hex on you!

Until we scoop again, if you're insecure about your spouse getting a massage from an attractive therapist, suggest a couple's massage and pick the right professionals. The key to keeping your spouse focused on what's happening at your table is making sure that your therapist is two scoops of bold and beautiful, baby!

What are your thoughts on ? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- so drop your comments in the Comments section below, tweet about it on Twitter, share it on Facebook, or chat about it on our Message Boards.