When the one you love's in love with someone else... like your dad

Don't you just hate it when your son is in love with your ex-wife so you have to flirt with your other son's wife whose father is trying to remarry your ex-wife? If that doesn't makes sense to you, it will by the time you're done reading this week's Two Scoops commentary. And if it does make sense, you are a sick, twisted, awesome soap fan.

Liam isn't the only one getting used to sitting in the big chair. Oh, hello, fans of The Bold and the Beautiful! Mike is once again on special assignment this week he's... saving... um... rescuing... Okay, so he's really not on assignment. After having him here on staff at Soap Central for about eight years, I've learned quite a bit of dirt about him. And let's just say that I decided to use it to get him to "step down" as Two Scoops columnist this week. I mean, I get to be the one to have first crack at making sense of the decision to ditch Winsor Harmon as Thorne Forrester. Running Kroll Publications, er, Soap Central has to come with some kind of perk.

Mike will, however, be back next week, provided that he doesn't burn down a warehouse, kick or a puppy, or something even worse -- blackmail me into giving him back his columnist slot!

There's kind of a hodgepodge of things to talk about this week -- on-screen stuff, behind-the-scenes stuff, and stuff that hasn't yet happened but soon will.

SPENCER VERSUS SPENCER

I am not entirely sure that Liam is qualified to run Spencer Publications. He might be more qualified to oversee a dating app, considering that the bulk of his time in Los Angeles has been chasing after two or three different women. You know what? Scratch that. What does Liam actually do? If I remember correctly, he started off a computer fixer-upper and then an IT guy at Spencer. I've got my fingers crossed for Spencer Publications because there is nothing worse than having a guy running things who really has no idea what he's doing.

That being said, if I were a pregnant 65-year-old with a smart college-bound kid... I'd be in seventh heaven. Someone on Twitter suggested that Liam will have Spencer bankrupt by the time November Sweeps rolls along. At first, I sort of dismissed that as a bit of twitaggeration. No, that's not a word, but it works as a word in my head. The more I thought about it, the more I thought it would be interesting if Liam did end up getting Spencer in some sort of financial pickle. Would Liam have to rescind his executive orders on extended retirement age, paid maternity leave, and college scholarships?

I liked Liam's suggestion that he and Wyatt run things together. Oh, I don't think it would work for a second, but it would be fun as hell to watch. Wyatt claimed that he didn't want in on that because their horrible father should step back in and lead things. That doesn't entirely ring true for me. A couple of weeks or so ago, Wyatt was chattering on to Katie about how he was the heir apparent. When Liam was "named" head of Spencer, Wyatt was furious. So why not take the chance to co-rule with Liam... and then do everything in his power to sabotage Liam and seize sole control for himself?

Wyatt isn't the sharpest crayon in the box to begin with, and I suspect that sexy times with Katie have clouded his brain even more. I like Wyatt and Katie together far more than I ever thought I would. I've always been a fan of Heather Tom's work. One day when she wins her squillion-and-third Emmy, I am hoping to be nearby backstage when she asks, "Does anyone want this thing?" I will grab that thing so fast, it will make Ridge's putting the moves on just-got-the-rings-off Brooke look like a snail stuck in super glue.

Sorry. The daydream of stealing an Emmy got me off track. I think what I was trying to say was that I like Heather Tom and Darin Brooks individually and figured that I'd like them paired up on-screen, but sometimes couple chemistry doesn't work like that. I just wish they had a better smooshed name than "Watie." That is terrible. Then again, most of those smooshed names are.

I will say that I am surprised -- and probably should not be after covering soaps for 23 years -- that some viewers seem to still have an issue with an "older" woman being involved with a younger man. It isn't just on B&B that this has come up, but also on a few of the other soaps that have told similar love stories. Maybe "similar" isn't the correct word, since I think the Wyatt and Katie love story is far more fun than nearly all of the romances on daytime. It's playful... a little silly... and even Katie has commented on her reservations that Wyatt is younger than her. Oh, and he's her former stepson.

Yet, I don't think I have seen any "complaints" that Eric is older than Quinn. Same goes for Victor and Nikki on The Young and the Restless or, when it was on the air, All My Children's Adam and Liza. AMC viewers did, however, have an issue when Erica Kane dated a much-younger Ryan Lavery. I don't get the double standard, especially since soaps have long been deemed a genre that appeals mostly to women. Of course, there has also been sharp criticism that soaps often "romanticize" sexual assault.

A BRIDGE CROSSED TOO MANY TIMES

I realize that times have changed. Things that were seen as perfectly "acceptable" in, let's say, the 1970s would never be tried in the 2010s. Or would they? The Bold and the Beautiful became a worldwide favorite for its fashionable people and glamorous storytelling. And let's not forget its myriad love triangles. Does Brooke love Ridge or fill in the blank ?

I get the appeal. It reminds me of the time Brooke told Ridge, "There's been another man that I've needed and I've loved, but that doesn't mean I love you less. And he knows he can't possess me, and he knows he never will. There's just this empty place inside of me that only he can fill." Actually, now that I think about it, those are lyrics from "Torn Between Two Lovers" by Mary MacGregor. That was a scandalous thing to say back when the song was released in 1976. But here we are, 41 years later. Is it really shocking? Does a love triangle still have the same oomph that it had 40, 30, or 20 years ago?

I think it does -- but not when someone has been bopping back and forth between the same two lovers over and over and over and over. I would be fine with Brooke going back to Ridge and declaring him the, no, the love of her life if she hadn't done it 312 times before. And Ridge only seems to be interested in Brooke when she is unavailable. Once he's (re)gained her love, he finds a new shiny object to chase after.

In my mind, if you are the one, true love of someone's life, you can get past all the crap that comes your way. Maybe things get too much to handle... but I would think that you would find your way back to each other. Or maybe I am just trapped in the 1970s with Mary MacGregor and her two lovers.

While Ridge is on my mind? Wasn't he fighting the urge to thrust his tongue into Quinn's mouth last week? Now he's... over Quinn? Completely? For realsies?

I want Brooke to take some time to figure her life out. I don't know that she has ever been single long enough to know who she really is. I think it would probably be a very un-soap storyline, but I'd love to see Brooke try to adjust to not having a man in her life. Ridge suggested Brooke throw herself into her work. I don't care what she throws herself into as long as it isn't onto a man. Let her finally become a strong, independent woman. If not, every time a guy likes it and puts a ring on it... she is still going to end up as one of the single ladies.

I WANT YOUR SAX

Is there anyone out there that doesn't think Bill and Steffy are going to end up doing the do? Freud's head would absolutely explode. Bill's ex-wife is sexing his son so he goes and has a dalliance with his other son's wife who was once married to his other son. Is that right? It's all very incestuous to me. Or maybe it just seems exotic, since I am an only child.

Let's review the events of the past couple of weeks. Bill has gently caressed Steffy's hair. They have been standing awfully close together. Their conversations never take place more than maybe ten inches apart from each other. And the trifecta? At the end of Friday's show, after they got their Hell's Angels on and talked about being "friends," they got a sexy sax solo as they stared longingly at each other.

Soap hookups can usually be telegraphed well ahead of time. I mean, I already know that little Douglas and Will will be fighting over Zende and Nicole's miracle baby in a matter of years. Unless that's forbidden by genetics. It's too far into the column for my mind to be able to process family trees. I would love it if B&B's writing team is not planning to have Steffy and Bill become a thing (again) and just set up all these red herrings to get us in an uproar.

I think that totally random and clunky mention that Steffy and Liam are trying to have a baby was thrown out there for a reason. I sense that we might be headed toward a "one-night mistake turns into a who's the daddy" saga. Of maybe we're not. Or it could be another red herring.

Another potential mate for someone is set to hit the screen this week. Francisco San Martin is joining the show as sexy, conniving masseur turned Forrester estate manager. He's young and handsome and has a great smile and chiseled abs. Hot, right? I mean, if you're into that whole super sexy Latin lover thing. Somehow, the new character -- named Mateo -- crosses paths with crazy Sheila, and Sheila directs him to do what he can to break up Quinn and Eric's marriage.

I have no idea how that plot will go, but looking ahead... Mateo is only scheduled to be on the show for a pop in and pop out (so to speak). I think it would be better if he were to stick around so that he could eventually end up as a romantic interest for another character. The show needs some new blood. There aren't that many potential mates for him at this point. Sally will end up with Liam, I assume. If Steffy and Bill become a thing, and Wyatt and Katie remain intact, that leaves... who does it leave? Maya (who seems happily married to Rick -- and Zende is gone, so that near-kiss thing is moot) and Nicole (who is married to the previously mentioned Zende). I would say that Brooke is single, but I suspect that she will soon be part of a...

GAME OF THORNES

Were you as surprised as I was when Winsor Harmon announced on Twitter that he'd been told by B&B executive producer and head writer Brad Bell that the role of Thorne Forrester would be recast? I mean... why? The only time Thorne shows up lately is when someone dies. His name is hardly even mentioned, and I am pretty sure Eric had all of his photos removed from the Forrester mansion.

What maybe makes it not surprising is that when Thorsten Kaye took over the role of Ridge, he was quite a bit younger than Ronn Moss, who had played the role of Ridge since B&B's inception. So I could see where they might want to de-age Thorne so that the actor who played the role would be younger than Thorsten Kaye.

The thing that made me even more confused was when the new Thorne, General Hospital's Ingo Rademacher (which also surprised the heck outta me), revealed that he had originally been contacted about playing the role of the Forrester estate manager in about eleven episodes. Apparently thing got reconfigured, Francisco San Martin landed that role and it was determined that Rademacher would make a better Thorne.

Fans have been quite vocal about their unhappiness with the recast, and even Rademacher commented that he hopes viewers aren't upset with him. Harmon took to Twitter to wish Rademacher (and the show) well. It will be a bit of an adjustment to see someone new as Thorne. After all, Winsor Harmon joined B&B in 1996. It will, however, be kind of fun to see that both Ridge and Thorne will now have non-Los Angeles accents.

So what will bring Thorne back to town? I am going to guess that Thorne and Ridge will be squaring off for Brooke's attention. Maybe Brooke and Quinn could end up fighting over him. Then he'd be Thorne between two lovers. Um, yeah. Sorry. A couple of folks suggested on Twitter that perhaps Aly would be revealed to be "undead." I can't see B&B going that route, to be honest. Thorne doesn't really have any ties to current story. Maybe in the time that Thorne has been missing in action, he had another kid... who turned into a sexy, conniving masseur. I mean, I'd like to think that he was having some kind of fun while he was off-screen.

CLOSING TIME... CLOSING TIME... MAKE YOUR WAY OFF TO THE EXIT

Well, I guess that wraps up this unexpected return to Two Scoops. I hope that you've enjoyed my thoughts on the show. Mike will join Chanel in the regular rotation next week. And I'll be back to manning the @soapcentral Twitter account where I live tweet all four soaps throughout the week. For decidedly non-soapy stuff, you can follow the randomness of my mind on my @danjkroll account. Thanks for letting me pretend to be bold and beautiful -- and I'll see you around the 'net.

dan

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