I just can't wait to be king!

There was talk of kings and CEO crowns this week in Los Angeles as Ridge's announcement threatened his Forrester reign. Deacon vied to be the king of Quinn's bedroom but ranked as court jester compared to Eric. Bill banished a member from his kingdom and passed his kingly duties to his sons. And if you forwent the bonus scenes, you might be the king of missing out this week on the Bold and the Beautiful.

Some are born to be king, like Eric Forrester, all regal and even-tempered even in the face of great-grand fatherhood. Some imitate kings, like Wyatt, who looked more like a boy on bring-your-kid-to-work day when he dressed exactly like Bill this week. Some kings say, "let them eat ribs" if they don't like his actions. Others chose to be female kings of disguise like Quinn, who pulled a trick out of Sally Spectra's book to sneak a visit to Eric. And then there are those who lie in wait for the death of the king, like our old standby Rick, who ground his paws like Scar from The Lion King when he heard that King Ridge's secrets had come home to roost.

The Fourth of July finally ended on Tuesday, and the new day opened with a meeting Ridge called to make an announcement. It was concise and to the point. Rick, Steffy, and Eric didn't even have to sit down if they didn't want to. "Douglas. He's not mine," he told them.

Even though Rick had the intentions of Scar, I could hear Simba's song I just can't wait to be King blaring in Rick's head as his eyes lit up at the news. Rick danced into the mansion, singing, "Everybody look left. Everybody look right. Everywhere you look, I'm -- standing in the spotlight!"

"Not yet!" warned Rick's cute little Zazu advisor wife who was pretty in pink with no baby carriage in sight. But Rick couldn't hear a thing while high atop that animal pile of elephants, giraffes, and ostriches as he sang, "Oh, I just can't wait to be king!"

Yes, Rick was prepared to be the ruler of everything around, from the grandest of mountains to the humblest of common ground, and he'd even take the same salary. He wasn't alone. The lioness cub Steffy was eyeing the crown, too.

Ridge stared at them like the hyenas they were as he assured them that he could control the scandal that Rick deemed was the worst for Forrester in decades. Rick's statement dates the last scandal back to Brooke's 1990 pregnancy with him, doesn't it? Just five years later, Rick shot the CEO, Grant Chambers --sending Forrester reeling as head designer Ridge took the blame and went on the run.

Rick also had relationships with his nieces, Phoebe and Steffy, and their mother, too -- which upset Phoebe so much that she attacked Rick in a car and wound up dead.

Our little Lion King stole Forrester designs, too; however, he hadn't been the CEO then, and there hadn't been a morality clause, either. No, the morality clause was something built into Rick's CEO contract -- the one he craftily drafted himself to become the irrevocable CEO.

Just before binding himself to the clause, Rick cheated on his wife over a kiss, kept a lover in a nest while pretending to reconcile his marriage, and tricked Eric into signing the document that would have disqualified Rick based upon morality. Next, Rick shot up the office, became a tyrant, overpriced a clothing line to sabotage the designers, and made Aly grovel like a slave if she wanted a shoe line -- a shoe line that magically appeared this summer for Zende to photograph, mind you. But as Bill says, only money matters, and Rick was the best CEO Eric had ever seen.

Rick dubs Ridge's news the worst in decades, but I'd call it the repeat of the decades and ask Rick to recall the scandal that tore his own life apart when Thomas was born. The teenaged Rick sobbed about how much he hated Ridge for tearing apart Rick's family. Ridge had just found out that Thorne had been pretending to be Thomas' father when it was really Ridge, who chose to raise the baby with Taylor.

No morality clause for Thorne's time or position. There is one today, and it should preclude Rick for his indiscretions during his last tenure. It's no matter because Mufasa Eric got an ego boost from the lioness Quinn, and he named himself the crisis CEO.

Ridge didn't fight it and inevitably walked out of the office without so much as a "good luck." Rick brown-nosed Eric a bit with a "You look good behind that chair. I'm just saying..." before rushing off to stop Maya from helicopter-dropping their belongings onto the Forrester lawn.

If you caught Maya and Rick's Proud and Loved bonus scene from Wednesday, you saw how Maya revealed that she'd tucked condolence cards in a box on the coffee table within Eric's reach when she lived there. You also heard Rick admit that he was never good at being the king of the family. Maya assured him that all she needed was more of life with him, their daughter, and their lovingly messy family. It was kind of cute and heartwarming.

Steffy had little to say about Eric's decision. To me, she seemed more concerned about whether she was actually Ridge's daughter than what transpired between Caroline and Thomas to create this scandal. "Am I your child?" Steffy asked Ridge. In light of the paternity debacles of most of his kids, Ridge should have said, "Go ask your mother. How do I know?"

Taylor and Ridge planned for the twins, but I vote for DNA tests for Douglas and Thomas. It might be some karmic justice to learn Ridge didn't father that monster Thomas but actually did father Douglas. Of course, Forresters don't vote anymore, now, do they? Even though Eric's words meant nothing to help Rick keep the CEO seat, Eric's words unseated Ridge.

Steffy said that at least Caroline didn't do her dirt with a stranger in a bar. Don't laugh. This is really Steffy's assessment after just hearing that Bill cheated on Katie with Katie's sister. It must be what Steffy tells herself to be okay with her quickie marriage to Liam's brother. At least Steffy didn't marry a stranger, so Liam can still see her across the table at Thanksgiving.

Steffy wasn't surprised in Monday's bonus scene, Dad Cheated, when Liam told her and Wyatt about the love lair at the office. "His napping room?" Wyatt asked. "The one with that stupid, cheesy stallion painting on the wall?" Steffy was quiet, probably so she didn't have to reveal that she'd had a love nest with the married Bill once. Husbands and competing lovers don't need to know everything.

In truth, it would be easier and less scandal if it had been a stranger with Caroline that night -- if she'd had a choice of sex partners, that is. Thomas took the choice away by just showing up where he was "needed." No worries. It's just a scandal for the Lying King, Ridge, and he's the only one who loses.

When Steffy asked Ridge how he knew he wasn't Douglas' father, Rick said it was the vasectomy that his mother had told him about. "Of course she did," Ridge said, probably realizing he didn't even have a friend in Jesus anymore after trusting so-called friends like Brooke and Katie. Caroline and Thomas are no better.

Thomas worked on muscle gains and hid out with Caroline in the sky lounge while Ridge took the hit. Thomas wants to be a father so badly but isn't man enough to barge into the meeting and own up to his part in things. Caroline, who claims Ridge was only protecting her, doesn't bother showing up to protect her husband. According to Thomas, dressed like the newest member of the "T-Birds," the lie was Ridge's mistake, and they didn't need to hold Ridge's hand.

If you caught the bonus scene from Tuesday, The Decision , you know how things really went down that night from Caroline's point of view. "He's not going to discuss that night in the hotel room, is he?" Thomas asked. What an interesting thing for Thomas to worry about, huh? Caroline completely absolved Thomas in less than three minutes. Here's how it went:

In Caroline's view, it was no one's fault. Everyone made mistakes that night, and one bad decision led to another. She explained that Ridge had let her go because he couldn't give her a child. "I don't understand how he could have done something like that," Thomas said. That makes Ridge and Thomas even. Ridge didn't understand Thomas' actions that night, either.

Thomas claimed that no one should be alone on a night like that. Steffy would agree about being alone, since Wyatt's comforting spooning saved her. The only difference -- and Steffy ought to point it out to Thomas -- is that copulation was not required, no matter the drunkenness.

Thomas never would have let Caroline open the wine had he known about the pills. Caroline claimed she hadn't cared, and nothing would have made her feel better. Nothing, Thomas. Did you hear that? Nothing. Not even your sex. Caroline apologized to Thomas, saying she "didn't remember," which hinted that she might now, I don't know. Bottom line, she still says it shouldn't have happened.

When Caroline said she was pregnant when Ridge revealed his infertility, Thomas realized she knew all along that Douglas was his. She diverted to, "I know that you don't agree with what your father did, but Ridge was just trying to protect his family." Wow. Blame it on Ridge much?

Is it even worth it to reiterate how down for this plan Caroline had been? Is it even worth it to recall that Caroline had stopped herself from telling Thomas before Ridge even knew anything? Caroline stopped herself because she'd found him fooling around with the intern a short time after "comforting" Caroline. Caroline received another jealousy check when Veronica flirted with Thomas this week.

Thomas called it nothing serious when Caroline asked if Thomas and Veronica were seeing each other. Yeah, they saw each other, but Veronica ignored the hell out of Caroline. He isn't serious with Veronica because nothing Thomas ever does is serious -- just ask Ivy, who escaped the clutches of the non -condom-carrying club member. Thomas claimed he changed, and the fast life is behind him. Isn't dating another Forrester employee kind of the same old routine?

A lot of people are still irate about the way this went, and they believe Thomas took advantage of Caroline, even raped her. I am in that club, a platinum member. It is crystal clear that the writers want to bury the rape in victim apologies and plow over every character's integrity to help their next plot, which is Thomas and Caroline hooking up.

This is why, so far, Thomas and Caroline are waiting for the parade of backlash that will never come. Caroline was in a hurry to hustle Ridge out of the office to go home. She reasoned that what "we" did wasn't so bad. Wasn't it what "Ridge" did while talking to Thomas? She assured Ridge that nothing had changed, and they were still the same people. Ridge believed that everything had changed. They just didn't know how yet.

Here are thoughts on it from viewers from our Soap Central message board:

• Earth to Caroline, earth to Caroline. She didn't get hurt. Thomas didn't get hurt. Ridge DID GET HURT!!! She led him to believe for close to a year that she wasn't a willing participant that night. She let Ridge believe that Douglas was THEIR child in every way that mattered to her and that she'd walk through FIRE for him and their family. HA! Now she refers to Douglas as HER son or Thomas' son. Ridge is being insulted, ridiculed, berated and pushed out of the job he was groomed for all his life. But nothing has changed????? No one was hurt???? SMDH! -- Luvzach

• Ridge set himself up to get hurt, that's on him. In the meantime, he hurt his son and his first born grandson for his own benefit. Caroline is minimizing like Ridge did to hector her into agreeing about Douglas. What you sow, you reap. -- Mudlokate

• Caroline is responsible for the pain and humiliation that Ridge is suffering from, she could have made it crystal clear that she had sex with his son. As far as the lie goes, nobody forced Caroline to participate in the deception; that was her choice. -- Harely

While posters and I agreed this week about the CEO-ship and Ridge, Caroline, and Thomas, one thing many posters disagreed with me on was the Batie/Brill situation and the way King Bill cleared out his kingdom. Bill got a lot of flak for supposedly gaslighting Katie, but I agree with Bill that Katie gaslighted him. In my opinion, she did it to take the king in her ongoing chess game with Brooke. Her best move in the game was the putz-to-knight move she made on Liam.

Katie's worst move was playing her hand by telling Bill that if he was cheating and if it was with Brooke, he could kiss Will and the company goodbye. It's kind of hard for a threat like that to go unheeded. It -- and Liam's insistence that Bill tell Katie that he'd long since boarded a life raft to escape his Titanic marriage -- are most likely the reasons Alison wound up as the Fourth of July babysitter instead of the usual nanny.

In my opinion, the writers are telling two separate stories at once. One story is the mental breakdown of Katie, whose thoughts of dying stem back to the days she slept with Nick and whose perpetual fear led her to forge a connection between Bill and Brooke. It's much more than postpartum, as Bill expressed. Katie didn't have postpartum when she was crying about dying and Nick impregnated her. She doesn't have it now, either, so that excuse is as bogus as her Fred Sanford spells.

The other story is a husband who decides to be loyal and not fail at the marriage, despite his feelings for his wife's sister. The sister does not want to concede to it because she does not want to devastate her sister. These two struggle not to have an affair, but the wife imagines it anyway. The wife is up and down with accusations, drinking, and depression until the husband actually does betray her.

Bill fell off the Brooke-sobriety wagon when he finally gave up on the marriage; however, Brooke wouldn't comply with his boorish plan to have an affair on the side so he could get what he needed while trying to keep his family together and escape the lies about the drinking and the accusations.

In my opinion, Katie was well aware that he was going to leave her, which was why she made a big speech to stop him, reverted to outright accusing Brooke, and threatened Bill with taking the child and the company. These are not the actions of someone who is being "gaslighted" into believing that an affair is in her head. They are actions of "Chicken Little" who realizes that the sky is actually falling as she feared and worried for months that it would do.

These are the reasons I can't buy the game Katie ran on Liam to enlist him as her spy. Everyone knows Liam is an out-of-work Rescue Ranger. Steffy won't hire him to save her from her marriage. Now he's doing pro bono saving for Katie and doesn't see that, no matter how Katie got the way she is -- whatever way she is -- Katie needs help, and Will should not be exposed to her issues.

In the bonus episode called Bill's Point of View , Bill explained in under three minutes what went down with him and Katie for the last several years. He relayed that he'd tried to be loyal, tried to stay married, but couldn't do it anymore. He watched Katie decline into drinking, lying, and imagining things, and he has to protect Will. Whether Bill has the master power of controlling Katie's mind to make her doubt herself and believe him over her lying eyes does not matter -- nor will it make her sane enough or safe enough to care for Will right now.

If I were Bill and trying to be loyal and not hook up with the woman I felt was for me, I'd get tired damn quick of being accused of the very thing I was working to avoid. If you keep accusing a husband of cheating, then he'll think, "Why not just do it? She doesn't believe me anyway."

I don't agree with Bill for not owning up to his feelings back when Katie blamed the conversation she'd overheard on Brooke. I don't agree with him sexually harassing Brooke into an affair behind Katie's back. I do, however, understand not being able to be the sole pin in someone else's sanity and sobriety wheel. That's just too hard on top of worrying about a child's well-being.

Some believe Katie, who says she only drinks when she suspects Brooke and Bill, so she won't drink because the truth is out. First, it's a mistake to believe a person with an addiction. I think that's rule number one in the supporters' support group. If it's not, it should be. Second, it stands to reason that if Bill and Brooke drive Katie to drink, Katie might pour a triple now that she knows she's lost Bill.

When Katie used to paw nervously and tearfully at Bill, she'd say, "I just can't lose you. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you." So I doubt her problems are over. Then again, the stories are written with disappearing ink nowadays, so you never know.

No matter what the writers try to portray -- sex without consent is serious. Alcoholism is serious. Both are incredibly destructive to lives and to families. Marriage is also serious. Bill's attempt to remain in his marriage was what a man should do. Even in the face of cheating or conflicting emotions, couples in real life manage to love each other through it, and some marriages survive cheating and alcoholism.

Bill and Katie do not need to survive it because a third marriage is not the charm after Bill's third time cheating and Katie going crazy twice. Bill is not father of the year, but he is the mentally balanced parent right now, so he should act on Will's behalf. If he didn't, naysayers would accuse him of abandoning Will while Katie was too emotionally unstable and recovering from a disease.

Katie told Bill that Brooke had won, and Bill was the prize. This statement signifies the reason Katie stayed around, drinking and acting out. It wasn't because she believed Brooke or Bill. It was because she wanted to win against Brooke, just as always, but Brooke didn't even know it was a competition. Why else bring up "Brooke winning" at a time like that? No one is winning, Katie, especially not Will.

Liam asked Bill to play fair, and Bill said it depended upon Katie. We all remember her keeping Will from him, worrying him that he'd die on the mountain, and taking Spencer Publications. Bill seems ready for her this time. He's already drawing up papers to have her declared incompetent and sending the Rescue Ranger to Monaco with Wyatt and Steffy.

Is Katie ready? Is she sobering up and cleaning out the liquor cabinets to prove she's not incompetent? Previews suggest that she's still playing chess with Brooke, hoping to outwit and recapture that Spencer king. Maybe Katie will surprise me and be sober and in her right mind while dressing Brooke down for the twelfth time.

Where is Will? In a location Bill won't reveal to Liam because Liam will go running to Katie. In a divorce, you have to be proactive. You just do, so maybe Katie will drop the chess with Brooke and start The War of the Roses with Bill.

As for Liam, Wyatt, and Steffy in Monaco, we'll at least see some good sights while the tennis match between brothers ensues. Steffy can easily end it with a "love Wyatt" or "love Liam" at any time. Will she in Monaco? In case you missed it, Bill assigned his sons to take his place at an annual Spencer Summit so that Bill can protect Will and battle Katie, and media star Steffy must also go.

In other tidbits, Deacon resurfaced long enough to sexually harass Quinn this week. As is typical of the B&B cavemen in Los Angeles, Deacon pawed at her, not taking her no for an answer. He was amused and turned on when she physically fought him off. But what's a little sexual assault between exes? Deacon is brooding because Eric, and not he, took over Liam's abdicated throne of worship in Quinn's life. Deacon admittedly can't take being shoved off a cliff as a hint.

Quinn's no good at taking hints herself -- or outright orders. When Eric sent her a selfie and thanks for encouraging him to be CEO, Quinn channeled Sally Spectra, donned a suit, and played a Russian "hard drive fixer" to gain access to the new CEO. Just like her grandma, Steffy sniffed out the enemy -- this one forgot to remove her perfume. Steffy ripped away parts of Quinn's disguise and screamed like she'd found a cockroach under her designer bag.

Is Eric going to throw Quinn out or own up to his affair with Liam's former captive? As long as he doesn't wind up naked on a ledge, I'm good however Eric handles it. He's a grown man -- a grown and sexy silver fox, according to Deacon.

I can't cover it all, and I appreciate the help from Soap Central's dedicated "Shaking my Head" thread on our message boards. Here's what you noticed this week:

• SMH that Katie let "that bitch" Alison in her house! You just knew she was up to something. -- MeWriter

• SMH to Caroline. All she has proven is that she's truly a Spencer since she is willing to let Ridge take all the blame for her mistake. -- GHKissoff

• SMH Rick going into the "how can I use this?" look when Ridge announces that Douglas isn't his son. -- Katbert

The final two shaking my heads go to me, who wonders who makes Don Diamont's hair so silky smooth? I want to play in it! And why wasn't the Queen of employment, Intern Nicole, consulted about naming a new CEO? Not to worry, she and Caesar-haircut Zende will be back next week with some young love surprises. Until next time, serve your king his next martini with olives and in a proper glass, not a paper cup. It's the only way to show you're bold and beautiful, baby!

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