Amber just keeps hanging on

We have had to endure baby switching, undiscovered porn tapes, drug addiction, and now this latest ill-conceived plan to get back at Ridge. What more are we supposed to stomach out of Amber?

Over the years I have really pondered the question 'Why is Amber such a front-burner character, anyway?' Did Bell Jr think she would be the latter-day Brooke or maybe just that wacky but misunderstood little spitfire that would chronically screw up but everyone loved her anyway? Ok, news flash Brad...whatever your intention with her, it's NOT working. I think I speak for many viewers when I say that her presence does little for the show and after last week's antics, I dare say she has become a drain on the show. Let's examine...

We have had to endure baby switching, undiscovered porn tapes (whatever happened to those?), drug addiction, and now this latest ill-conceived plan to get back at Ridge for being a good father and disapproving of her 'relationship' with BARELY legal Thomas. What more are we supposed to stomach out of her character? Is murder next? Will she just go the way of crazy Sheila or psycho Morgan? Hey, maybe her and Morgan should do lunch when she comes back to town...what a great teacher in the subtle ways of revenge and obsession! It was all the same crocodile tears last week that we have seen all along and for once it seemed that TOOOOOM (as Stephanie says it...gets on my last nerve) was not ready to take her slack again. Now that he could get a chance to deflower Caitlin, why keep messing with Mrs. Robinson? No need to pump our ego anymore and he had always liked Caitlin more I think. I'm not her biggest fan but I will say those two make a more believable and palatable couple in the long run. Both are in high school and they can be that 'cute and sweet' couple that every soap needs these days (just think JT and Colleen from Y&R or Allison & Aaron from ATWT).

I don't know about you readers but I was hoping for a juicy little catfight between Amber and Bridget! Things were getting a little tense and I was glad Bridget held her own and helped expose this nasty and undisclosed personality trait to nave Thomas. Bottom line...Ridge and Bridget did not do anything and running around with your camera phone does NOT make you look very good to anyone. I am hearing that Thomas gets fed up with her next week and finds the cajones to cut her off. Sent into an abyss of frustration and revenge, Amber decides to make trouble at the Big Bear cabin. I doubt whatever she does will have any lasting effects as Ridge and Brooke have been proven to be completely covered in Teflon...nothing sticks to them and their marriage is, for the time being, impenetrable. Hey, don't get me wrong, I'd be the first one to celebrate their demise but I have been hoping for too long now. My question is...what exactly will be happening at the cabin that is SO monumental? The spoilers paint this 'Everyone's lives will change' picture and though I have been racking my brains to think what else could be in store, I'm at a loss. Maybe Brooke sees too much of Bridget and Nick kissing and can't harness that ugly green monster of jealousy that lurks inside her. Hmmm...

Let me put on my psychologist's hat here and take a closer look at HOW Brooke could be at all concerned about the prospect of a Nick-Bridget coupling. First, how would the Message Board community abbreviate their names...Nidget, Brick (no, taken), Nudge?

If we trace everything back, we see Bridget and Deacon hooking up as she was barely 18. Then Brooke couldn't have her daughter enjoying a little beefcake without getting in on the action, so she slept with Deacon and got knocked up. Bridget couldn't let that go without answering back with some hot zesty kisses with Ridge, the love of Brooke's life. Score- Bridget 1, Brooke 1. Now Brooke has a short-lived fling with Captain Tequila during the WTD debacle and actually sleeps with him a few times. They part ways and now Bridget is developing a 'thing' for him and will likely sleep with him, too. Score- TIED again! So if Brooke is actually angry, I would have to ask 'WHY?' These two share men like siblings share toys. Neither seems to care how 'close' these men are to the other, so who cares? With an obvious shortage of hot men in the cast, who else is there to sleep with Bridget? Deacon will be gone soon and Clark is never around long enough to have a relationship, so who does that leave? Is it healthy? No. But what are her options? Might as well make it interesting, huh?

Ok, how much is the poor cue card guy being paid to make sure that Sally doesn't miss a line? Whatever it is, it's not enough. I have never seen anything like this in all the years I have been watching soaps. She must not be able to memorize ANYTHING to rely so heavily on them. It was SO obvious that I almost felt bad for her. Please, readers, let me know I wasn't alone in my observation! Poor thing. Well, it seems that Eric is so desperate to reunite the feuding Duke boys that he is willing to scribble up another collection to compete with Spectra for Thorne. A little egotistical isn't it Thorne? Come on, I like your character and am glad you are finally getting your 'respect' but GEEZ! 'I'm so wonderful that everyone will have to fight to get me.' Ok, that's not a little over the top! I hear that Spectra finally wins this one and he will stay with Sally. Probably a good move for him because let's face it...he was right when he said that thing would not be any different if he came back. He would still be force-fed Ridge's crap and besides planning an'upper level' office for him, Mom & Dad weren't saying too much about HOW he would fit in if he came back. Oh well...they are stuck with the original 'center of the universe' Ridge. With all that cash leaving to buy back the stick, whom are they going to get to buy it? Give it to RJ? Interesting...watch for that to be brought up in the future.

Watching Deacon this week made me think of that song by George Thorogood 'I Drink Alone'. Oh, when they fall, they fall HARD. By drinking the vodka you would think Jackie would not have smelled it on his breath but she freaked out and left him in his Stoly's spiral of self-destruction. Mojo's plan is working well and it makes me wonder if he really wants Jackie to come crawling back or is this strictly to mess with Deacon? I'm not sure but it's all academic now as rumors persist that Sean Kanan will not resign with the show. Gee, imagine that...losing another front burner actor. Could it have been the stories? The ratings decline? Not enough CASH? Will I be sad to see him go? Yes, as I thought he was great as the resident scheming bad boy. It has been his recent 'clean up' that made him less attractive to me and I think he became a little bland. Watching paint dry was more exciting than watching the 'new' Deacon. Other readers have said similar things and are sorry to see him go.

Question of the week: Is allowing Deacon to leave going to help or hurt the show? Is he THAT worthwhile the show or had he become useless eye-candy filler?

On a more somber note, the Scoops staff (of one) is in mourning until Super Bowl weekend as the beloved Pittsburgh Steelers suffered from the dreaded Choke-itis (again!) and won't be at the Show. Football is sacred here in the Scoops office and is the sum of all things everywhere. The ultimate sport, that which sustains from August to February, making every Sunday tolerable. Alas, I am left to cheer for the other Pennsylvania team to beat the Patriots who have become the bane of my existence as a football fan. First, the Panthers and now the Steelers. Donovan, if you can hear me, you know what you have to do.

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Who's on the Soapbox? Jean writes... '...why are Thorne and Darla at the end of the line in the opening credits? I don't get that at all.' I wonder the same thing! Poor Thorne, still in the 'basement'. Patsy writes... '...I want to see some of the old acting and actors in some good love storylines, not all this bizarre crap with monkeys!'

Keep the emails coming...I'd love to put you on the soapbox!

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