Shielded by the cape or covered with cloaks and daggers?
For the Week of January 23, 2017
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Superhero Dylan shed his cape to create a new undercover agent image for his secret mission. But will the seductive cloaks and daggers game with a sensuous spy end up destroying his marriage? There's more going on under the covers than Dylan's image in Two Scoops.

I thought that once Dylan said his sad goodbye to Sharon, it was also a final farewell to his fans. Boy, was I wrong. Well, of course, if a cop volunteers for a highly dangerous mission filled with suspense and intrigue, Y&R had to take advantage of the opportunity to make a story out of it. And naturally, the espionage had to be complete with a beautiful, mysterious woman who had more than money on her mind. But just how far would our superhero go to acquire the fruits of his deadly adventure? Has our Boy Wonder left the Dynamic Duo partnership with his father, Police Commissioner Paul Williams, forever? The answers to these questions have the potential to add more drama than his secret undercover operation ever could.

Seriously, just how far would Dylan go to get the information he needed from the delicious and delectable Alex? She must have been pretty scrumptious, because Dylan didn't take long to test out her lips. However, when the lovely lady wanted to add some powdery life to the party, Dylan tried to distract her with food. That guy was determined to taste something good, wasn't he? So, apparently, kissing and food trumped drugs in Dylan's mind. But would Dylan take kissing to the next level of second or third base -- and even to try to score a home run with the vivacious vixen in order to keep his body pure from the illegal substance? I'm sure if Sharon knew, she would want an answer to that question also.

Even if it was a highly secretive assignment, it would be such a huge tumble off the pedestal for the caped crusader if Dylan were to complete his mission while in the grasp of ecstasy, either through a lusty romp in the hay or during the high of a narcotic. Why, our champion would have to turn in his cape, for sure. At first, Dylan was able to avoid that tragedy (of losing his cape, not so much for cheating on Sharon), as we cheered for his bravery -- and cringed during his carelessness. I even pointed out to my husband that Dylan and Alex were two pretty inept spies. It seemed like they were made for each other.

However, Dylan…I mean, Derek realized that kissing wasn't enough of a distraction for the sexy spy, so he had to take off his shirt -- and the rest of his clothes -- to make her forget about any inconsistencies concerning his boss. Hey, Dylan wasn't kidding when he told Paul that he had found some unexpected curves in the road, which he had negotiated, because those curves were all on Alex's body. But Dylan wasn't really cheating on his wife, since he pictured Sharon in his mind while he was making love to another woman's body. Okay, yes, I can see where that would be an excuse for adultery. Not. But I guess all's fair game in the spy world, and after all, a man's got to do what a man's got to do, even if it meant making the ultimate sacrifice of seducing a gorgeous woman. Man, that's just tough.

Clearly, Dylan refused to cross the line of his morality in taking drugs, but he eased up on his virtuousness when it came to using sex to keep his cover. What's a poor, misunderstood undercover agent to do? Apparently, whatever was necessary for Alex to arrange his meeting with Fisk. Hmmm, I wonder what other hoops the comely, mysterious lady will want "Derek" to jump through? Dylan, all decked out in a snazzy pair of sunglasses, attempted to find out when he left with Alex. With the shades, Dylan had the spy/secret agent thing going on, which was strange, since he was supposed to be undercover. You would have thought he'd go for the more incognito look.

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When they arrived at a dark and gloomy warehouse, Dylan was forced to remove his sunglasses, which gave him a clearer vision of a bloodied man tied to a chair, who was immediately taken out and shot. I guess Fisk meant business. After Dylan provided a very generous payment, Fisk played a sinister game of hide-and-go-seek with the product, where Fisk's henchman drove Dylan to somewhere that may or may not be pier 13. Now have we seen the last of superhero turned superspy, Dylan? Has Sharon seen the last of her Dylan, who would leap tall buildings for her? Who knows? But this cloak and daggers tale is providing a nice exit for Steve Burton, even if we will probably be left without knowing immediately of Dylan's fate.

And speaking of secrecy and intrigue, if Hilary had her way, that's exactly what she would want for Devon in regards to the details of the New Year's Eve benefit. Forever and ever, Amen -- although Hilary never seems to have goodness and righteousness in mind. But how long does she really think she can it keep it a secret when practically everyone in town already knows what happened that night? Even Jack warned her that her very shaky house of cards would come tumbling down if Hilary was not the one to tell Devon the truth. Hmmm…truth. That's one concept that seems to evade Hilary, yet somehow she has always been able to come out smelling like a rose in the past with Devon. But even Hilary realized the fresh aroma of those days could be gone for eternity if she didn't come clean with Devon about what she did to Mariah.

Well, I give her credit for trying anyway. But, come on, it wouldn't be a soap if the big reveal wasn't dragged out for a day. Or a week. Or a year. Yikes! You would think someone who'd actually witnessed Mariah's grand declaration at the benefit and the resulting argument between Devon and Hilary would slip up at the wrong time and say something before 2017 was out. And you know that's the way it will happen. Because Devon refused to let Hilary utter a peep about the details of New Year's Eve, a figurative bomb will hit him once he "accidentally" discovers the facts about that night from someone else. Hilary may not have enough smooches to wipe away what she did.

Wow, I cannot believe Lily has actually given up her vendetta against Hilary, after all this time. She even has the ammunition to get Hilary, once Stitch gives the word that Devon is strong enough to handle the truth…and Lily is just walking away? What?! This will probably be the most shocking event of the week. But Lily claimed she was only giving up her Hilary "bashing" for Devon's sake. Where has Lily's concern over Devon's happiness been during all this time? Lily saw Devon deliriously in love, and all she could do was to cheer for his marriage to fail.

Devon needed to see the "real" Hilary for himself, but he had never been able to, and once Hilary decided she wanted Devon, she had to find a way to keep the nasty part of her hidden from him. But how on earth would Hilary be able to hide the details of Mariah's fall on live TV from him? Hey, maybe she could borrow the cloaking device from Star Trek. Oh, wait, I think that only makes solid objects invisible, not nefarious actions. Oh, well.

Seriously, does Hilary have any feelings at all? That phony-baloney, sickeningly sweet, so-called apology to Mariah was for the birds. It was Hilary's obvious attempt to keep Mariah's lips sealed about the benefit. It's almost like Hilary thinks everyone else is so dense, they can't comprehend just how brilliant she is. If she could feel, Hilary would realize that actions speak louder than words, and after all the rah-rah-rah about the two of them moving on to a better relationship, it was her act of trying to turn Mariah back into her gopher that said it all. Hilary just can't help herself. Why be nice when you can be nasty? It's not "our" show, it's "my" show. Oh, yes, Hilary, you came through loud and clear.

It's true that Mariah spilled the beans to Devon about her little teleprompter edit on New Year's Eve, but did Stitch inform everyone who had attended the benefit to keep silent about Devon's accident? I mean, since Devon was on the mend, it would be natural to assume he would want to personally check in on his new business. Why didn't Ben run to Mariah and give her his doctor's order not to let out one peep about the accident? Actually, since so many other people knew, how did anyone expect it could ever remain a secret for too long? Hilary was delusional in thinking the truth about that night would never come out. But this will give her something else to blame on Mariah.

Past foes have learned the hard way that it's never a good thing to get on the bad side of Hilary. Even though no one thought to warn her about keeping silent, Mariah is bound to become the next target of Hilary's anger, especially after Devon declared that no matter how much money he had tried to throw on it, his relationship with his wife was still ugly and cheap -- and then Devon told Hilary to get out. Oops, it looks like their baby plans have been put on hold. But you know it's not over and that Hilary will find some way to slink and slither her way back into Devon's good graces, his nice house -- and his luscious money. Even though Hilary's venom has always been toxic, Devon could never see her for the snake she was. Has Devon finally had that "Rain in Spain" moment to clearly see the person Hilary really is? I think he's got it.

Luckily for Lily, she was too busy with running the Athletic Club and her new Brash & Sassy modeling career to give a fig about Hilary's unpleasantness and deceit anyway. She did seem to be a great choice for their new body spray line. (And no, that was not meant as an underhanded insult. I am sure the lovely lady routinely stays as fresh as a daisy.) Cane was right -- Lily did look gorgeous. But even if Billy and Victoria agreed that Jill had found the perfect choice for their product, no matter what praise Cane heaped on her, he probably wasn't too thrilled with Lily resuming her modeling career. Shoot, Cane probably thought his life had finally settled back down and that he had his loving wife and their adorable twins to make up their happy home. Modeling will put his spectacular wife right back in the eye of the public -- and of other men.

Victoria sure seemed to be just a little bit jealous of Billy's relationship with Reed, but who can blame her? It was easier for Reed to talk to Billy, whom Reed had always been rather close to throughout the years. Sure, it probably was "a guy thing," but Reed also knows that Billy is no angel, which comes in handy for the teen, since he has found a sudden interest in porn. And Reed's not above using his mom's credit card to pay for it, either. Oh, yes, Billy's no saint, and Reed's no angel, even if he does want to spread his wings and fly.

But Victoria could forget about all that, because it was time for the big Top of the Tower Newman family dinner. Victor's continually full of surprises, isn't he? Come to find out, Victor arranged the din-din to show his appreciation, simply because all of the family members seemed to be getting along together. Who is this guy? He looks familiar with the mustache and all, but still, he's just too full of goodness and light. It's so unnerving. Maybe there was a Victor look-alike with a bad accent, lingering away in a prison somewhere, who had waited patiently for Jack to spring him, so the impostor could impersonate Victor. Nah, that kind of thing's already been done.

During the festivities, Victor pointed out to Nikki that since Faith had a gift for playing chess, she should develop it to its full potential instead of settling to become a bartender. Whew, what a relief! Now there's the Victor we all know and love (and sometimes hate). Victor got two beloved family members in one shot, although maybe Nick shouldn't be included, since, after all, he does own "the dingy bar." But that's only one step above being a lowly bartender in Victor's eyes. Ask Travis. Victoria may have been kidding when she said Victor's reason for having the big family event was because he had decided to stop meddling in his children's lives -- but I am sure it was also wishful thinking on her part. And apparently, that's still never going to happen.

Nick and Chelsea were reunited at the festive dinner with kids in hand, and they shared their relief that they had stopped anything from happening on New Year's Eve so they could remain friends. Oh, come on, who are they fooling? Themselves, for sure. The looks they kept exchanging were more than just friendship. I don't mind them as a couple, though, especially since Adam's not returning anytime soon, so I'm not complaining. Nick expressed his wish that Connor and Christian could become good friends, and I can see that happening. I am sure those two young ones will miraculously be the exact same age in another year or two. And they will probably be in the same grade at school, too, when the time comes. Funny thing.

Phyllis was a little underhanded in pursuing tech guru Ravi for Fenmore's, but all's fair in love and war -- and business. Ravi should at least consider her proposal of working for both Jabot and Fenmore's. But since he seems to have no interest in being an employee of both, Phyllis has absolutely no chance at stealing him away from Jabot, even if Ravi has no contract, is being paid at a lousy rate, and has an office that is a joke -- the same one that used to be her joke, only Phyllis never knew the punch line. The odds are astronomical for Phyllis to entice Ravi away, even with a great salary and benefits, as long as Ravi has the hots for Ashley, whose perks he would prefer.

While Lauren and Phyllis worked together to try to get Fenmore's back on its feet, Gloria did everything she could to tear it down. Can't Gloworm see that all of her schemes tend to fail? Sure, she chased away one potential investor, but Michael saved the day and found another, who was more than willing to be a silent partner. You can't blame Michael and Kevin for not trusting Gloria. They certainly know their mother. "Intrusive" is a word that describes Gloria very well. She's another parent who constantly interferes in her children's lives; however, she's nowhere near the expert that Victor is at it. Gloria could take some tips from the Mustache.

Oh, so Gloria's scheme was to entice the nice and boring Craig into marriage so she could put his offer of being Lauren's silent partner to a screeching halt? Well, I have to say, it's a different strategy. If she is successful, will Glo worm her way into Jack's life also? You would think that Craig's "full bank account" and his "lovely house in Nantucket" would be enough of a reward for her. But Gloria still wanted in at Jabot. What is Gloria's obsession with Jabot?

Gloria's best days were probably as John's wife, and she always claimed to have loved him. But John's gone, and Jack and Ashley can't stand her. Why would Gloria even want to go where she's so obviously not wanted? Maybe that's a question Michael and Kevin can answer. They should know better than anyone. But Phyllis observed Jack and Gloria in cahoots and must have realized that there was another partner in the dance. How will Gloria play into this bizarre tango between Jack and Phyllis that already has Lauren, Ashley, Ravi, and Michael waiting on the sidelines?

Other notable (or humorous) items that happened during the week

I had to chuckle when Victor announced that it warmed his heart to see his family getting along at the family dinner. What?! He did not say "the cockles of" his heart? Shocking! As I've said before, I love that phrase.

Seriously, Sharon knew that Dylan was on a dangerous secret mission, yet she didn't hesitate to try to contact him when she found the cell phone in the drawer of Paul's desk? Was she crazy? Oops, sorry!

But Paul was right. He knew about Sharon's past mental issues, but he never even considered what it would do to her to be kept in the dark about her husband. That would make it somewhat excusable that she flipped out a little and tried to get answers about Dylan. The only thing Paul had to offer at that point was comfort.

Michael and Gloria can still bring the humor. When Gloria told Craig her cell phone was like her third child, Michael quickly responded, only "not in the order of preference." It was funny and probably true!

So, Ravi's father is an actual rocket scientist working with NASA. It just figures.

Noah finally pointed out something to Sharon that soap fans have been wondering about for years. Why would Dylan ring the doorbell at his own house? Soaps tend to have a character waiting for a loved one to return home, and he or she will jump every time a doorbell rings or there's a knock at the door. But to me, it always seemed unreasonable for the character to believe the loved one would do that at one's own home. It's almost as bad as having an ex barge right through the front door of his or her former home, after the divorce, years later. It's unheard of, and if my ex ever did that, I would call the cops. (Or Sharon's psychiatrist, since he's no longer with us.)

I am offering my prayers and am keeping good thoughts for our precious Max Page, who has had medical complications all of his young life. I always loved Max as Victoria's Reed, and I absolutely adored the on-screen chemistry he had with Billy Miller's Billy. Take care and stay strong, Max!

Until next time, please stay tuned.
Teddi

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