Remind me to never look for truth, justice, and the American way in Genoa City, Wisconsin. How else can you view the travesty of justice that occurred in that soap reality just this past week? With the flimsiest of evidence, dingbat Daisy was released from prison. Really. It wasn't just a fantasy sequence. That henna-headed redhead got herself out of prison thanks to a dim-bulb but shrewd attorney by the name of Avery Bailey Clark.
Let me start by saying that Michael was really off his game in court. He was somehow allowed to argue the D.A.'s case, even though he should have been disqualified because of Lauren's involvement. Nevertheless, this is a soap judicial system, so even though he's not the best choice for a criminal case, there he was arguing to keep Daisy behind bars. It wasn't much of a speech and his witnesses -- Lauren and Kevin -- were ripped apart on cross. Thank you for playing soap justice, Michael, but you lose, and here are some lovely parting gifts. We hope you like Ginzu knives!
Avery's big "smoking gun" was Ryder's video. Now, why didn't Michael demand that it be authenticated? How do we know when it was done and if it was real? At the very least, Michael could have used the time it took to verify the tape as a delaying tactic. But no; soap justice is swift when head writer Maria Arena Bell's in charge.
Then there was the issue of Daisy's sentence being changed to time served. That would never happen. Let me repeat -- never, ever! Daisy committed several felonies, including abandoning her baby, fleeing to Canada, and stealing a car. That was all after she assaulted Daniel and left him to die. That's also known as involuntary manslaughter in the criminal code. Even if you buy that she was coerced into caging and tormenting Lauren and Jana by Sarah, even if you believe that she was once Sarah's victim, Daisy is guilty of horrible crimes and has been in prison less than a year. What judge would consider that justice? What about justice for the victims? And, Michael, what about appealing the judge's decision!
Of course they're setting up another gee-whiz murder case. Everyone is going to want to kill Daisy, starting with Lauren. Those scenes in the shooting range are preparing us for Lauren to turn into a Dirty Harriet (see the Clint Eastwood movie Dirty Harry if you don't get the reference)! Vigilante justice will be on the menu for Ms. Fenmore-Baldwin, and when Daisy shows up dead, there will be quite a few potential suspects: Phyllis, Daniel, Lauren, Michael, Kevin, Gloria… Probably even more by the time I write my next Two Scoops column!
Although here's a suggestion for Maria Arena Bell: please don't do another murder mystery! The Diane Jenkins case was a drag. Yes, there, I said it. The payoff did not live up to the prolonged investigation and all the red herrings and possible scenarios we had to endure. So Nikki was the murderess, but she killed Diane in self-defense. Big whoop! Talk about a waste of time and talent…
Speaking of Nikki, it seems crystal clear that Victor is the most stubborn, willful man alive. How could he imagine that Nikki would be okay with his admitting that he's paid for Anita and Chelsea to run a scan on Billy and Victoria? His entire plan to break up their marriage has been ridiculous from the start and has only resulted in unifying them as a couple. Basic psychology -- which Victor should understand -- would tell him to support the relationship to the max. Then, if he's right about Billy's failings, Vicky and Billy will fall apart all by themselves. By being the master manipulator, Victor has successfully alienated himself from Nikki once again. And Victoria doesn't want to have anything to do with him either.
It is wonderful to see Nikki so in charge again. It's been quite a transformation considering how much of a lush she was just a few weeks back. Perhaps we should see Kay and Nikki and Harmony having a meeting in the mansion, checking up on each other's sobriety. It's a storyline that should never be completely forgotten.
What's the deal with Anita and Jeffrey? Did you see how she dropped her jaw at the sight of him? Could it be that Anita is an ex-Mrs. Jeffrey Bardwell? Or maybe they worked cons together back in the day? There is definitely something going on there. I'm also wondering when Jeffrey's going to suddenly have that memory jolt when his brain starts functioning again. That's when he'll remember that Angelo ripped him off and Gloria is being duped by the mobster. Can't happen soon enough for moi!
What are we going to do about Angelina and Kevin? I don't see him falling in love with her. She's become a human being, which is a big step up from the original Angelina who was a cartoon, but Kevin is still in love with Chloe. I find it incredulous that Kevin is allowing Angelo to intimidate him into remaining married to Angelina. Kevin hasn't even thought to go to the authorities to get Angelo off his back. How about this? Kevin uses that smart little brain of his to turn the tables on Angelo and get the mobster off his back once and for all? If he doesn't, Kevin is going to go crazy when Daniel and Chloe become lovers.
I have another note for Ms. Arena Bell. Let's move on from the happy, kissy-face Cane and Lily. They're going nowhere, and blissfully happy is just boring daytime drama. We knew this was going to happen. It always does. But before we turn away from the glaring glow of wedded bliss, what the heck was Cane wearing on his wedding day? Was that shirt something he found in the Provence country store? It looked like the gingham tablecloth you'd use for the picnic in the park! Puh-leeze! For a wedding, wear a clean, white shirt, young man!
It was oh-so-special that Jill just happened to convince Ashley that Cane was the perfect man to take Genevieve's place in the Jabot marketing department. Now, considering the fact that Cane has cast his mother out of his life because she put her selfish business interests ahead of Jack and love, wasn't it a wee bit hypocritical of Cane to not even consider his mother's feelings before saying yes to the Jabot job? Did it even cross his mind that Genevieve might be stung that "Ethan" took her job and is working for Jill, a woman whom he considers more of a mom than Genevieve ever was? Wasn't Cane as guilty of insensitivity as Genevieve when she bid on Beauty of Nature? Isn't this a case of the pot calling the kettle black? Yep, it sure is.
Interestingly, while Lily and Cane are a yawn to me, the continuing romance between Billy and Victoria is not. Perhaps it's because of the fact that Chelsea is there and she's bound to be a problem. I have to confess that I was shocked to hear Victor claim that he'd found Billy in Myanmar after Chelsea had conned him. Didn't you think that Victor had arranged the entire scheme? So that means that Chelsea just happened to pick out Billy as a mark and got herself pregnant to shake him down? Is that how the scam works?
I ask because it seems like a really risky con. Chelsea had to find a guy, assume he was potent enough to impregnate her, be certain that she was ovulating at the time of the lovemaking, and hope that the sperm fertilized her egg on the first shot! That's not a sure thing, if you know what I mean. Then, once all that was accomplished, Chelsea still has to carry the baby for nine months and hope there are no complications.
There have to be easier ways for a grifter to make money than this pregnancy bit, don't you think? Anita seemed to imply that she and Chelsea were old hands at bilking people for money. By the by, why did Gloria give Anita a job? Was it just a way for her to stick it to Jill? It's funny, but in this economy where people are looking for jobs everywhere, Gloria is just doling them out. Apparently, all you need to do is fly to Genoa City and go to Gloworm. Jeffrey and Anita both got hired without sweating through a job interview!
Of course, in the winter, nobody is sweating much, unless you're talking about Adam and Sharon in Kansas. Did they really need firewood after the all-day sex romp on the farm? I thought they'd be rather overheated by the time they went downstairs. But that was just a way to put Adam in a precarious situation. Naturally, Adam found previously untapped reserves of strength and sensory skills to be able to get the hose connected to the pump and put out the flaming barn without being able to see a blessed thing. Thus we have yet another instance of Adam being a good person. But you know that the other shoe is going to drop… like when Paul discovers that Patty escaped the mental hospital thanks to Adam's help.
In other bits of story, we had Jack finding a physical therapist who's going to push him to get back on his feet. Still no word about Kyle. Couldn't Jack have picked up the phone and called his son? That seems odd to me. Angelina and Kevin moved into the hideous new house where Angelo will be watching them like a hawk. Devon's getting ready for his surgery, and Tucker's "allowed" to go. How big of Devon to let him be there. Geez… soap characters are just strange. Tucker's been kind and generous to Devon. That young man should try reciprocating, especially since Tucker never knew that Devon was his child and has been playing catch-up.
Finally, a word about Phyllis and Avery. Well, George admitted the truth and now we know that Phyllis was right. Her turning on her father had been justified. It still doesn't explain why Phyllis has been so vicious in print to Sharon and the women in Genoa City. It still doesn't explain her ripping Lucy out of Billy and Victoria's happy home. And it sure doesn't make Phyllis any more understandable as a character to those of us who've watched her scheme over the years.
So, that's it for this past week. I'm anxious to hear more from you all -- do you like the Two Scoops? What stories would you like to see "fixed" and what characters need a re-write? Click here to write me! Till then, have you heard about our new Soap Central -– the Soapcast? Each week check out a viideo round-up of the latest soap opera news and comments about all the shows. Here's a reaction for our first effort, and please check out this week's broadcast on the Soap Central front page!