There must be something in that Genoa City, Wisconsin, water; how else can you explain the evil women who seem to be thriving in that supposedly sleepy, moral Midwest metropolis? The current litany of ladies who need to check their attitudes include Katherine, the malicious mama tiger; Phyllis, the Lucy-obsessed bloggermaniac; Chloe, the girl who never met a grudge she couldn't hold; Diane, the serial bed-hopper; Genevieve, Cane's crazed, and previously unseen, mother; and, depending on the occasion, Abby, Ashley, Victoria, Nikki, Jill, and Lauren. I guess Maria Arena Bell can't write a female character without making her capable of transforming into an evil bitch at the snap of a finger!
Let's start with my evil enemy number one: Katherine Chancellor. Kay has apparently forgotten everything she ever learned about forgiveness and second chances. Even though her life is rife with mistakes and catastrophic calamities that should have taught her life lessons, she's reverted to a complete hellion of late. For what reason should she be so mean to Ashley and Jack? What is that all about? She watched them grow up. John Abbott was her best friend, or so she says, and yet she's turned on his children like she has no allegiance to them.
I don't buy the notion that Kay is acting this way because her son's life is in the balance. Puh-leeze! Kay loves Tucker like I love the bunion on my big toe. Or maybe I should say that Kay loves Tucker just as he is at this moment -- in a coma. She doesn't really want him to come out of it. He's the perfect son when he cannot challenge her or fight her for control of the company. She likes being in charge of McCall Unlimited, and I wouldn't be surprised if she never relinquishes the reins. Don't be shocked if Kay is working with Victor to ensure that Tucker will awaken from the coma and discover that McCall is wholly owned by Newman Enterprises! Tucker will be shocked, but it'll be his own fault for having left Katherine in charge. Tucker should have known better.
Speaking of Kay, it's interesting that she's been able to cope with all her troubles without turning to booze, while Nikki has fallen apart. Well, that's the disease of alcoholism, but I do think that Kay dropped the ball with Nikki as far as being a sponsor/mentor/friend. Sure, Kay has been preoccupied with Tucker and the business -- as well as her vendetta against Ashley! -- but if she could find the time for a Memorial Day party to say goodbye to Chance, Kay could have checked in on Nikki! After all, Nikki is not just a casual friend. Kay owed it to Nikki to find out if she'd been drinking or not.
Nikki's explosion at the A.A. meeting was probably meant to be a tour-de-force showcase for Melody Thomas Scott. The actress did a fine job, channeling Elizabeth Taylor in Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? But there was something off about the whole scene. Is it right that the soap is spilling so much of the behind-the-scenes business of A.A.? Doesn't it seem like a violation of the program? And Nikki wasn't just condemning the meetings and the program, she blamed Deacon for coercing her to drink again. Shouldn't she have taken responsibility for her actions? Deacon didn't buy the bottle of booze she was swigging in the park; Nikki did! Oh, Nikki, Nikki, Nikki…is there a reason you didn't turn to Kay? It's not like Kay wouldn't understand what you were going through.
Since it was evil women week, that meant the men were mainly heroic and kind. Daniel was sweet and loving. Billy held it together. Nick and Adam played nice. Jack and Michael were helpful. And the biggest bastard of them all, Victor Newman, was Mr. Wonderful. He not only was kind and understanding to Nikki, he even whisked her off to rehab, unpacked her suitcase, gave her a gift, and kissed her goodbye. Nikki couldn't have written a sweeter send-off herself. It almost made you believe that Victor has a heart. Oh, right, he does: Colleen's. She must have been guiding him last week.
So far, Colin's evil has had a very narrow focus. He's all about the twins and wanting to raise them. I can't see how his plan will work with Jill attached to him the way she is, but I suspect Colin assumed he'd dump Jill along the way. As a longtime Y&R viewer, you know that's easier said than done. Still, Colin has a world of trouble heading his way in the form of Genevieve. Clearly, Genie Francis' new character is no Laura Spencer, although Genevieve may need a rubber room like Laura very soon. Genevieve looks like she's not all there in the mental department. She's justified in her revenge on Colin, but there's something psychotic there, too. Did you notice how she cut herself with the scissors while fixing the flowers and barely noticed the blood?
Okay, so now we know that Caleb is actually Cane, and it was Caleb who died on the steps of the church, not Cane. Excuse me, but didn't they do some forensics at the morgue? Wouldn't Caleb have different fingerprints than Cane? And don't tell me they wouldn't check; it's simple to run prints these days. There's a little hand scanner thingie that they use on NCIS. But, apparently, nobody checked. (By the way, wouldn't there be some differences in Caleb and Cane's bodies? Like maybe Caleb had tattoos? Appendix scar? Surely the teeth aren't exactly the same!)
So we accept that Genevieve arranged for the Caleb/Cane switch; but did she know that Blake would shoot Cane? How? I guess I ask too many questions. I'm sure Maria would tell me to just go with the flow! Genevieve seems intent on stopping Colin from getting the twins, and Cane's going along because he's trying to protect Lily and the twins. Don't count on Lily forgiving Cane too fast, though, because the way he's haunted her has been pretty ghoulish. A loving spouse should not have played it that way, but I question exactly when Daniel Goddard was told that he was Cane pretending to be Caleb and not Caleb pretending to be Cane. Oy vey -- my head hurts!
Diane is swiftly being written off the show. After her romp with Nick, I wouldn't be shocked to see Diane leaving Genoa City with a bun in the oven. She'll then have a reason to come back in a few years with Nick's child. You just know she's not going to go away quietly.
On the other side of the country, Sharon has apparently decided to stay in the barn for the rest of her life. Fortunately, she doesn't have hay fever. How convenient was it that she saw Adam at the Harvest Festival -- oops, my bad -- that was the San Pueblo festival. The set was a complete duplicate, minus Meggie trying to kill Murphy. Still, it served a purpose; Adam met the carjacker who put a seed of doubt in his mind about Sharon's accident. And Piper saw Nick and Adam on the computer, and you know that will mean something in the future.
My favorite evil wench -- the one I love to hate -- is Phyllis. This woman is determined to become the most hated woman in Genoa City. She will have no friends by the time I write my next Two Scoops column. Seriously, who's still talking with her -- Chloe? Phyllis desperately needs to check into the sanitarium with Lily. Phyllis is so obsessed with Daniel's child that she can't see that she's destroying her relationship with Daniel. And Daniel deserves some of the blame for Phyllis, too. He needs to do more than just act independently. He needs to put Phyllis in her place. It's his life, not hers. Would you let your mother exert that kind of influence on your life? Wouldn't you tell you mother to back off, give it a rest, take a hike, leave me alone, and butt out? I loved my mom, but there's a time to step up and say, "ENOUGH!"
I want to know why Billy didn't have Phyllis arrested for hacking into the Restless Style web site? She didn't even lie about the fact that she had no business posting a final blog on the site. Billy is so slow on the uptake; he should have had IT change the access codes for the site so Phyllis was locked out. I want to see Phyllis locked up for her criminal behavior. She's crossed the lines far more times than Ashley, who is sitting in jail now just because she went to see Tucker at the hospital, thus defying an order of protection! Where was Walsh to go after Phyllis the way he went after Ashley (after Kay threatened to make sure he wasn't re-elected!)
Finally, I'd like to inject a word about reality, if I may. Let's talk about money. Does anybody really work in Genoa City? Does Daniel have the money to take care of Lucy, to buy all that furniture and baby wipes and stuff? You think baby powder is cheap? Does Chloe ever go to work? Is her new attorney expecting her to pay the bill of his services? If you were Billy, wouldn't you fire Chloe from the magazine so she couldn't afford the expensive lawyer? She's trying to take Delia away from Billy; why should he keep Chloe on the payroll? And without a paycheck, what judge is going to hand Chloe sole custody of Delia? Don't worry about Delia; she's living quite well at the Chancellor mansion without Chloe paying for room and board and vittles!
And what about Jack? Is he living on stock dividends, because he's been off Tucker's payroll for a while? Oh, right, he must be collecting unemployment insurance! And have the Newman kids received their 500 million dollars yet? If you had 500 million dollars, would you return to the workforce like Victoria was contemplating last week? Why?
We've seen that Diane is flat broke, but she still managed to fly -- first class -- to and from New Mexico. Who bought that ticket, some one-night stand in the airport? Really, folks, wouldn't life be a breeze if we never had to worry about how to pay the rent or the credit card bills? Let's all move to Genoa City!
That's it for now. Can't wait to see what happens next week! Let's take a look at some recent notes from the mailbox: