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 Two Scoops: May 4, 2009 columns
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Michael Graziadei
Are you my daddy?
by Nita
For the Week of May 4, 2009
The rumor mill apparently isn't working as accurately as it used to, because one insistent whisper in particular was proven to have no roots in reality.
Before I get started, a big THANK YOU to Allison for so graciously agreeing to share her opinions about Y&R in my absence. I'm sure you all enjoyed her take on things as much as I did.

Now, let's dish. I'm all caught up on my viewing and continue to have a marvelous time watching all the unexpected developments. The rumor mill apparently not working as accurately as it used to, one insistent whisper in particular was proven to have no roots in reality. Count me relieved there turned out to be no partner swapping in the love matches of Kevin and Jana and Daniel and Amber. From start to finish, early screeching aside, I was satisfied with Amber's gentle handling of the very damaged Kevin and was glad neither crossed the invisible boundary lines of their friendship.

When it came to the kidnapped Kevin caper, although I found plenty of detractors out there, I remained a fan riveted by many of Kevin's mesmerizing moments through it all and a couple of times found myself on the edge of tears at his apparent agony. Okay, I have to confess I could have done without the whole talking chipmunk head thing. I love our scribes, but I'm guessing that idea had to be a whole lot better in discussion and theory than it turned out to be in filmed reality. First of all, the whole subject of childhood abuse and its disturbing after-effects is a serious one, and I'm convinced that had they wanted to, our talented scribes could have played it dramatic and straight with dynamic results. The chipmunk head kind of trivialized it and probably made a lot of fans watch it in FF motion. Too bad if that was the case, because it was worth suffering through silly scenes of the multi-colored head to savor Kevin's outstanding performances. Greg Rikaart - a home run for you, boy! Kudos also to Amber/Adrienne, both for her tenderhearted, never say never attitude that had her determined to save Katherine and Kevin or take her last breath trying. She proved herself to be a friend anyone would be glad to have in the trenches with them.

Unfortunately, I cannot speak nearly so glowingly of Daniel, for his Johnny come lately decision to lend a helping hand to Kevin. For weeks, Daniel did and said all he could think of to dissuade Kevin's friends for risking life and limb to help him. Then, when Kevin had all but his left foot out of the woods with no thanks to Daniel, here Daniel came, just in time to appear the hero. Sorry, but for this fan, it did little to make up for his former callous indifference to his supposed best friend.

Anyway, even though the large lady hasn't crooned the final tune, for all intents and purposes, I'm guessing Kevin's long ordeal is all but over. He still looked a little shaky at the wedding, but he's definitely on the mend. I'm looking forward to a touching reunion with Kay, for which I'm keeping the Puffs on standby.

Speaking of long ordeals, I'm glad Sharon seems to be coming out of hers and has finally acknowledged she plans to seek therapy to make sure it doesn't make a return visit. I don't know about anyone else, but I've had more than I can comfortably stand of Noah's accusing, unforgiving attitude and before that the revolving door that kept catapulting a different man into Sharon's rented bed. Which brings to mind one of those unexpected developments I mentioned earlier. Life has been so busy lately, I haven't had a lot of time to take a peek into the spoiler future to see what might be coming round the bend, so imagine my surprise when late in Friday's show, Sharon made that comment about her upset stomach and food thoughts that made her nauseous. And by the time I had jotted down a note to refer to that comment in this column, hazarding a guess, of course, that she might be pregnant, the last scene was playing out proving that very thing to be the case. Poor little kid to be, he's going to be like that little bird in the children's story, running around asking everyone if they're his/her Daddy?

Okay, you can call it my warped sense of soap fair play, soap opera justice or even character favoritism if you like, but Sharon finding herself with child is definitely my idea of extremely poetic justice. Given Sharon's recent frequent flyer activities, however, we all know what's coming - it's whose the baby daddy time. Under normal circumstances, my widened eyes would be rolling around in their sockets, like Tyra's often do, and in addition I would be lightning quick to poke my judgmental finger of fun at the scribes' decision to impregnate Sharon. But I can't help but appreciate the rich irony at play here. Once upon a time, Phyllis found herself growing thick with Nick's seed while he was still semi-unhappily wed to Sharon. Now the tables have turned and the past has sort of become the present with Sharon perhaps carrying the next Newman he or she while Phyllis worries whether Nick's re-pledged vow to her will hold. If I said I was dismayed by this latest turn of events, you all know I'd be lying through my teeth. Anyway, since Sharon has only just learned the news, news I presume she will be very slow in sharing, at the moment the possible Daddies could be any of the three men who hopped in and out of Sharon's bed. But with Chloe giving a darn good imitation of a human tracking device, breathing heavily down Billy's neck, who in turn is looking with longing hang dog eyes in Mac's direction and Jack representing a ship that not only has sailed out to sea, but never should have been boarded by Sharon in the first place, obviously my pick for Daddy to be is Nick.

When it comes to Daddies, Billy certainly tried to do the right thing by marrying his child's mother, but I can't help but feel for the guy. I mean, could you imagine how restrictive life might be when you're shackled to a stalker chick like Chloe? Is it even possible for her to let the guy take a breath without her standing close enough to determine whether it's fresh or not? And yes, I get that she might have an abandonment issue or two, but if I find her annoying with her constant calling and Billy monitoring, I can only imagine how it might be driving Billy completely bonkers. No wonder he feels driven to drink. Unfortunately, it looks like even that particular avenue of escape is going to be blocked by boulders now that Cane has decided that of all the dive bars that have to exist on the outskirts of Genoa City, he has to have the one his brother likes to frequent. So even if Billy manages to avoid Chloe's increasingly urgent SOS calls by setting his phone to silent, Cane's constant reminders of his Delia responsibilities are liable to sour the alcohol sauce on his stomach.

On another Daddy front, trouble is definitely brewing at the Big House on the Newman Range, which has the potential to cause an explosion that could make the one at Clear Springs look like someone set off a pack or two of firecrackers. I've heard the phrase countless times that the wormy apple doesn't drop and roll far from the gnarly roots of the scowling old oak tree. And since several Genoa Citians have commented that Adam is nothing at all like his dear, sainted Mother, I guess that places the apple, slowly rotting, right up against the base of the vindictive, vendetta focused Victor tree. Now, I do understand why Adam might still nurse a little ill-regard for Victor for repaying his perceived treachery against the family with career annihilation and jail time. Which is why despite Adam's ungrateful belligerent attitude, while beginning to weary this fan, still bought him a little understanding and the hope that a new, improved, remorseful Adam might still emerge from the embers. Unfortunately, my hopes are growing ever dimmer. Because if he is indeed behind this gaslighting of Ashley, one of the few people who has tried to treat him kindly, I will be forced to add my name to the list of those who oppose him. Because it's one thing to try to get back at Daddy, but punishing those Victor loves to get to him, a pregnant love at that, is more than I could comfortably condone. If Adam is indeed the evil instigator, instead of a mysterious someone else who plans to make him a convenient scapegoat, Adam's hatred obviously goes much deeper than repayment for what Victor has done since Adam came to town. It likely extends all the way back to the moment Adam decided Victor had abandoned his mother, and through her, him. Despite his elaborate determination to prove he's barely sighted and growing ever more so, I'm becoming convinced Adam can see as well as I can. And lastly, if he is the man behind the plan, given his confinement, he can't be doing it all himself. So does that mean his help is in the form of Rafe? Or Rafe's Aunt Estella, who clearly has no love for the latest lady of the manor? One thing whoever is behind this scheme has managed to accomplish. They have cause a small flame of sympathy to flicker to life in my hardhearted breast for Ashley. I never though I'd say it, but it's slowly erasing that distasteful picture in my mind of Ashley swiping and using those swimmers.

Ashley was rather pitiful in her bewilderment and fruitless attempt to assure her loved ones she wasn't heading for a return visit to the land where Baby Blanket Robert lived. But daughter Abby provided some levity with her blunt teenage honesty, snatching the words right out of my open mouth, when she took one look at the gargantuan marble Sabrina holding a baby she never lived long enough to deliver, and pronounced it "kinda creepy". I'm with you, Abby, it was very creepy. It's bad enough Victor's red egg gift to Sabrina was on display (or at least it was until Sharon pilfered it), and a pencil sketch of her stares sightlessly out from the living room wall, but now Victor has her likeness living in the garden. I liked Sabrina as part of the Genoa City canvas, and hated to see her go, but someone needs to tell Victor it's time to get a grip and let his former lady rest in peace.

While they're at it, perhaps that same someone could make a quick stop at the AC and give Jill that same get a grip counsel. Talk about stubborn. I agree wholeheartedly with fan Cheryl below. Jill isn't even making good sense. What possible motive would Kay have to convince Jill she still has love for her only to yank the rug out from under her and send her tumbling head over hooves, I mean heels? If Jill truly believes that, then she knows nothing at all about the true character of her used to be Mom. No wonder Kay decided to back off and give Jill her brooding space. Because she'd never have made it to her wedding day with Murphy, having been cut to cut to slivers and covered with third-degree burns by Jill's cutting, caustic tongue.

Thinking of stubborn, witch with a B women, can't help but bring Heather to mind. I love the woman with Adam, but away from him can she possibly be more heartless and hateful? I know, I know, she's just doing her job as an ADA, trying to incarcerate all the bad guys and gals she comes across, but I'm not convinced she's in the right profession. While I believe in standing firm on what you believe in, Heather needs to widen her viewpoint instead of insisting on looking at the world through extreme tunnel vision. Stubborn, unyielding, shortsighted and uncompromising, always in a headlong rush to ill-thought out judgment, she refuses to even entertain any but her own opinion. Unfortunately, she's almost always trudging down the wrong track. Even with the man she loves, her aim is far off the mark. Because, despite what she thinks, it's beginning to look like the last thing Adam is, is a nice person. Deep down or otherwise. If Adam is the villain he's beginning to seem, looks like poor Heather might have another rude awakening coming to her at his hands. If she wasn't so relentlessly hateful, I would almost feel sorry for her.

Thoughts of sympathy and sorrow were not even a blip on my horizon when Gloria decided to cleanse her soul with a full confession before her friends and family. After a moment of shocked disbelief, Kay ripped into Gloria in classic Kay fashion the likes of which I haven't heard since she had a stroke when she learned Jill was the daughter she gave away. She bit those words off and chewed on them for a second then hurled them with all her might at Gloria. Took me right back to the old days and was so enjoyable it had me watching and laughing over and over. But as much as I enjoyed Kay telling Gloria off, I was practically applauding Jeffrey for so quickly leaping to his lady's defense. Because although I would be the first to admit Gloria deserved all the derogative comments she got for the things she's done, I didn't like the jump on the bandwagon gang mentality Murphy, Amber, and Daniel, immediately exhibited. Only Jana kept a cool head and refused to chime in with the others.

When it comes to Gloria's confession, while it doesn't change anything she did, or may not even mean she's truly remorseful and wants to be a better person henceforth, I appreciate that the scribes are attempting to rectify the mistakes of the ill-written past as best they can with the mess they were left to clean up completely, or sanitize if it couldn't be completely cleansed. First, Gloria's greedy neck was lifted from the block when it was determined it wasn't the caustic contaminated face cream that killed Emma Gibson. And now she's lifted the carpet and showed everyone all the dirt she had swept under there. I have to give her points for that.

No brownie points for Lauren this week. Even though I know some fans are going to say, here she goes again, always on Sharon's side, I have to call things the way I see them. So I admit that Lauren got on my last nerve last week. I understand she loves her family and like a lioness, she's going to come out claws unsheathed and try to slice up all who come against it, but sometimes she can be more than a wee bit hypocritical with her belief that all should pay for their bad deeds, as long as none of them are in her family or a person she calls a close friend. I didn't hear her telling Phyllis she needed to do the time since she did the breaking and tearing up crime. You would think she would have a tiny sliver of understanding for Sharon's mental distress, since there was a time her own mental faculties were so awry she was afraid to venture one step beyond her front door. And I know she claims it was all about Eden, but she only started talking about pressing charges against Sharon when Phyllis, acting out of her own insecurities, incited her to it. But, even though I think she was overly harsh, I can't say I completely blame her. Because regardless of why she did it, Sharon has made her dislike of Eden crystal clear, which was bound to turn Lauren against her. But, my but number two, as a mother, I was a bit taken aback by Lauren's quick comment that Noah would be just fine with a jailed mother because he had Nick and Phyllis. Of course, Lauren is the woman who sent her son off to be raised by schoolmarms and headmistresses, I don't care that she later claimed it was for his safety. And given her own ambivalent relationship with her Mother, no wonder she might think a child has no need of his or her birth mother. I don't know, maybe it was just me, but I found Lauren's attitude callous and uncaring.

When it comes to uncaring, so many derogatory terms come to mind, I don't know which one to hang first on Neil. Disgusting, for one. I just wanted to slap Mr. Pompous as he pontificated importantly about how he raced into a marriage he hadn't really thought through and now claims he didn't really want. Uhhh, excuse me, but when exactly did he do all this rushing? When Karen sat him down and told him to think it through? Or was it when he claimed he did exactly that only to insist she was all he wanted? I am so not impressed with Neil or the annoying Tyra who Olivia acts as if she's Dru reincarnated. How long before Neil, Tyra and Ana are looking for happily ever after in Neil's little box? Not long, I'd wager. Especially since Tyra's response to Neil's saying he needed a little space and time was to plant a kiss on his lying lips. Ugh. I would say more, but fan Jan below has summed Neil up supremely succinctly. About the only good thing I can say this week about Neil is that he finally dug his backbone from the bottom of the hope chest and used it to strengthen his weak spine. Then peeled himself from the floor to stop being the Newman company doormat.

So flip-flopping Nick has made up his mind. Again. And flip-flopped back into Phyllis' bed. It both was and wasn't a surprise when he suddenly made the decision that Summer was young and needed him and he wanted to go back to being a family with Phyllis. Phyllis immediately took him up on his offer and showed him she wanted to cement his decision by sexing him senseless. It will be interesting to see how he reacts when he learns Sharon is pregnant. I must say, though, all this flopping back and forth is making it more difficult for this fan to give a care which woman he picks. It's hard to feel much empathy for the Phyllis character when it more often than not comes out on top. In more ways than one, I suspect. At the same time, Sharon's recent promiscuity has made it harder to see her as too much of a victim.

By the way, it would be nice to see Sharon with a women friend to confide in. Fans like to comment that she leans too heavily on the male species, but to whom else can she turn? Certainly not in Victoria's direction after what she did with her ex-husband. But Phyllis has Michael, Lauren, Jack and son, Daniel. A son, by the way, who did not turn against his mother, no matter how inappropriately she behaved.

So, is Mary Jane Benson really the former Patty Williams? A few columns or so back, a fan wrote that Patty was their pick for the mysterious PR person; thought the Mary Jane/Mary Jo similarity was just a red herring to lead us all galloping down the wrong path. And after Paul's reaction upon first meeting Mary Jane, I think the distinct possibility exists that the fan might very well have been right on the money.

And lastly, I really wanted to, but I have to confess I'm just not feeling Miss Mackenzie Browning yet. If it wasn't that Cane was already with Lily, I would find her a better fit with Cane than Billy. And even though he can't seem to stay away from her, Mac doesn't seem to feel the same about Billy. In fact, she seems pretty indifferent and it's hard to imagine she was ever so madly in love she married him and was prepared to share her most precious and as of then, untouched cookies. I'll be interested to see if her reaction to J.T. is any more animated.

Okay, ladies and gents. I'm out of here and on to the next item on my to do list. See you all in a week. Fans Cheryl, Jan and Wanda will take it from here. Enjoy!



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Cheryl - Never before have I seen such stupidity, as Jill demonstrated this week. Katherine tries and tries to reach out to her and Jill continues to profess that Katherine is not sincere. I think Jill just wants a reason to continue to be mad and miserable all the time. If Jill would stop and use her brain a little, she would realize what she has not lost - yet. The brightest spot in the whole week was Amber. She is so deeply sincere about Katherine. What a great scene when she made Murphy go away before the wedding. If we all only had friends like her. Billy and Mac - no chemistry. This Mac really does not work for me, with all due respect to the actress. I think they need a younger Mac - someone who is believable as Billy's love interest. I sure hope that Ashley doesn't go down that crazy road again. She should know she is being set up by that dirty little creep, Adam.

Jan - I am just done with the Neil character. Neil's been written badly since Carmen Mesta and this situation with Tyra just disgusts me (mostly because the scenes between Kristoff St. John and Eva Marcille are so badly acted that even I notice). The Winters family used to be so much fun to watch and now I fast forward whenever they show up. I cannot believe they have given Eva Marcille a 3 year contract, yet we lose Don Diamont, Nia Peeples and perhaps Bryton McClure. I'm very unhappy with the trend Y&R seems to be developing where they offer a front-burner role to the winner of a reality show (I had the same problem with the woman that played Sabrina). And don't get me started on the single dimensional performances by NuMac. Ugh. Watching her and Billy has about as much flavor as drinking boiled water. I sure hope the show kicks some of these less than skilled actors to the curb soon (and yes, I rewrote that sentence several times trying to tone it down a few notches).

Wanda - Why isn't Jill and Katherine trying to find their real daughter and mother, respectively?

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.
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