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 Two Scoops: May 1, 2006 columns
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Eric Martsolf
True lies
For the Week of May 1, 2006
Ethan needs to grow a pair, plain and simple. How can he think of himself as a decent human being when he tortures Theresa endlessly? He won't stop telling her how much he wants her, yet he won't leave Gwen. He will never let Theresa be happy with anyone else.
Theresa has gotten on my last nerve. Just because she wants Ethan to love her (I know he does, but his refusal to leave his wife should speak louder to her than his words), does not mean that she deserves him. How many women would be with Brad Pitt or Orlando Bloom if they just walked around insisting that's the way it should be? And now she's taken her ramblings and such to someone else's relationship.

First she berated Sheridan for turning down Luis yet again. Then Theresa offered to buy Chris off, which didn't work at all. Then she hammered home to Chris, yet again, that Luis and Sheridan are "soul mates". The wonder of it all is that Chris stood there and took all of this off Theresa when all he had to do was point out that Sheridan once again picked him over Luis. Some sign of soul mates, huh?

Then Luis goes to church with Pilar to pray for safety in Rome, which turns into a yelling match with God. Pilar berated her son for wanting to use his child to break Sheridan and Chris up. Luis should listen to Pilar. Theresa got pregnant with Jane thinking Ethan would come back to her, and look how well it worked out for them. This is what ticks me off most; Luis is no more interested in being a father to Marty than I am. If Sheridan wants a happy family she needs to stay with Chris. At least he does spend some time with James. However, it will be great to see Beth again.

Ethan needs to grow a pair, plain and simple. How can he think of himself as a decent human being when he tortures Theresa endlessly? He won't stop telling her how much he wants her, yet he won't leave Gwen. He will never let Theresa be happy with anyone else. And what was this crap he handed Sheridan about, "be with the one you truly love and not the one you feel obligated to?" Sheridan called him out quickly, but "noble" Ethan spouted again how much he loves Gwen. Someone needs to point out to him that he is cheating on Gwen mentally by telling Theresa he loves her every five minutes.

The thought crossed my mind that perhaps Lena is working for Alistair. But on Friday's episode, she told the person on the phone that she would kill Fancy. Alistair would never allow that. So why is it so important Noah and Fancy not be together? If Lena is just looking for someone to do her dirty work, why does it matter who is with whom? Of course now Esme and Gianni are going to try to split them apart. Its sad that Noah and Fancy are probably the couple with the most potential on this show and this is what is written for them.

Why can't Kay see that Miguel is just like Ethan? One minute he tells her that she is the love of his life, and the next he is chasing after Charity. (Or the blond mermaid he thinks is Charity.) Kay has a man that loves her unconditionally in Fox, why is she still chasing after that pipe dream of a teenage crush named Miguel? He will always want Charity, and despite Tabby and Endora's meddling, Miguel isn't going to fall out of love with Charity.

It is a little bit of poetic justice that Kay tricked Miguel with magic while he was with Charity, and now it is happening to her. This is proof that what goes around comes around. Sad thing is Miguel is kissing Kay one minute and telling her he loves her, and then he stops because he hears Siren calling him. And while I love Tabby, Juliet Mills deserves better than to share scenes in an absurd storyline like this "Little Mermaid" rip-off.

Now Whitney is in Rome. She apparently got there by walking through the underground caves. I imagine that is a loooooooonnnnnnngggggggggg walk. From New York to Rome nonstop is an 8 hour flight. And she did it in heels!!! Forget the flogging; that is torture.

Of course there is no doubt that the monk is Alistair and he is using Whitney to do his bidding. It has to be Alistair; who else could make Spike jump with a phone call? Of course Spike has to go to Rome now that Paloma, Simone, and Jessica are going. I just hope Spike doesn't come back from Rome. Jessica either for that matter.

Some Random Thoughts:

Why isn't Tabitha keeping tabs on what is going on with the monk? If he is evil, shouldn't she be rooting him on from her magic bowl?

Why didn't Luis and Chad (who ended up on the same flight), and Paloma, Simone, and Jessica fly out on the Crane jet? Where is the Crane jet?

Remember when Luis had Alistair cornered with those disks? Luis supposedly knew every illegal thing Alistair had done. Does Luis know anything about these paintings? How about what Noah and Maya are going through? If the FBI approached Theresa for help, why not turn Luis on to them?

I loved Theresa's analogy that the Lo-Fitz family is cursed in love. Not one of them is with the person they want to be with.

Does anyone else realize that Passions capitalizes off movies? Titanic, Pirates of the Caribbean, Cleopatra, and now The Da Vinci Code and The Little Mermaid (Siren). Can the writers come up with something original, or do they flip through entertainment magazines to come up with their next storyline?

Viewer's Voice:

"I personally don't care for Sheridan/Luis storylines. I don't care if who they are involved with...they just seem to be boring. I think Chris is better for Sheridan. Luis was too bossy and he made Sheridan seem weak. Aside from them, I am sick of these love triangles that are simply 2 people fighting for someone who is clearly not worth it. I really want Gwen and Theresa to leave Ethan and start different storylines. Also I am sick of people saying Theresa is a bad mother...everyone in Harmony is a bad parent. How often do you see TC with his daughters? Never! How many times do we see Chad exploit Miles to get Whitney back? How many times does Martin say he wants to reunite with his family but never does? Also Chris left James with a nanny for ages, Theresa does the same with Little Ethan, Gwen and Ethan leave Jane with someone...the bottom line is that kids are not a priority to all the parents in Harmony...so people need to stop bashing Theresa's parenting (or lack thereof)! PS - I love your column, keep up the good work!!" Thanks Joey!!!

"Okay, let's face it, the men of Harmony are abusive and not worth the women that love them. Every woman, except Eve at the moment, chases around after her man in an attempt to please them but they are never rewarded for their effort. Ethan is a jerk, I wanted Miguel to drown, the new Fox is annoying and Luis has always been demanding and abusive. I'm not a huge fan of Chris but I do believe that Sheridan deserves some peace and stability and Chris provides that right now. What else? Oh yeah, I have no rational excuse for watching this show and probably need to be committed just as badly as Theresa." Thanks Maine!!!

"I cannot believe a writer would say that Theresa is just trying to have a home for her children with two parents. Are we watching the same show? Let me see, in the rare time Theresa is with young Ethan, she gets him to call BIG Ethan and beg for help playing baseball. Anytime she's with Jane, all she talks about is getting Ethan to come back to her. Hello, children's services! I can't stand the whole Rome thing. Whitney is a joke, and those contacts must hurt, because she blinks constantly. NuFox makes me long for sweet, old Fox. Miguel needs to be smacked. Maria was so cute when she said, 'Not in front of the Mortals.' I have such visions of her and Endora when they are older! And for all the Luis lovers, Sheridan is so relaxed and content around Chris. He is so loving to her. Luis is getting into his bully routine again, although with a quiver in his voice because of his 'weakness.' If you really look at them, their relationship is based on sex. That's what they did all the time, even just after poor Antonio died. I'm so fed up, that I'm watching the show in under ten minutes. And I miss the magic, too. I miss Zombie Charity and evil Faith." Thanks MJ!!! I miss old Fox too.

"I'm not a Theresa fan. I love the actress, but her character is too self-centered & selfish. Why isn't she using her Crane power to get her children back? No, it's always about Ethan, Ethan, Ethan. She puts him before her children. And spending 6 years trying to destroy his marriage is not true love. Ethan is a pathetic loser & Gwen deserves better. The tabloid story is NOTHING compared to everything Theresa has done. Ethan is a total loser & both woman need to dump him fast." Thanks Lois!!!

"Kay sold her soul to the devil so I don't really care about what you say about Miguel being a dead beat dad. He didn't choose to have the kid, she ravished him. Miguel should be with Charity, they were meant for each other. Sheridan sucks; she's always changing her mind about things. Luis was wrong for not believing her about Marty, but he's only human. Her and Luis were meant to be together and she's playing with his head and that hurts. I wish he would go off and move on and get another girl pregnant and get engaged so that she can see how it feels and she can be the one begging all the time for their love back. Whitney's getting on my nerves because God would not do that. Someone needs to slap her in her face. She needs to get her kid and move far away and ditch Chad, even though they were wonderful together. I don't think they are half-brother and sister. Maybe that will be brought out soon. They should make it be Eve's sister baby if she tried to seduce Julian a long time ago. Ethan needs to go on and get with Theresa. I know she did a lot of bad things, but it's for love and Ethan loves her too. She shouldn't be doing all that adulteress stuff though. She needs to get both of her kids and get a life and Ethan will see that and realize the one he loves. But if he continues to make his marriage work with Gwen then fine, move on Theresa. You're smart and beautiful and sexy and he will repent when he sees that you have given up on him." Thanks Lysa!!!

"I am no fan of Luis, but I must say... can Sheridan and Chris really hold a candle to Sheridan and Luis? I'm pretty sure I've stated as much before. This whole triangle is just pure rehash of the most hated Antonio/Sheridan/Luis debacle. Complete with men with accents. I think Chris and Sheridan are cute together but I can't help but laugh when he keeps calling Sheridan his wife. First, because I instantly think 'mah wife' from Antonio. Second, because I know she's your wife - you don't have to repeat it every five seconds. It doesn't make the bond any stronger from repeating it. Lastly because, he's acting like he can compete with the history that Luis and Sheridan share. Granted, Luis is a pig-headed jerk who remains the dumbest police detective I've ever seen. Still, I can't deny that somehow, someway, Sheridan and Luis will be together. When that I happens I can go about ignoring them like I did before.
One quick thing - Pilar is now on my hit list for encouraging Miguel to make a family with Kay. You'd think she's learned that you can force the creation of a family. And how can she encourage her son to break up a couple and yet condemn Theresa for doing the same thing? Get it together Pilar. I was in your corner. Don't make me hate you." Thanks Kamal!!!

"I'm interested in this Vendetta storyline very much. The primary reason for this is because it gives Simone and Paloma a storyline. The only thing I have an issue with is that Whitney's actually stupid enough to believe this monk is God. I could've gone without seeing Esme again, although her forgetting Noah's name was a little funny. The mysterious Siren has debuted. And I'd like to throw out a simple guess as to this her identity. It's been speculated that she's either Charity or the last remaining Crane daughter. Well, I think it's neither. I think Siren is a brand-new character, and she's -- wait for it, wait for it -- a MERMAID. Know how I came to that conclusion? Well, they very subtly showed us Tabitha reading Endora and Maria a book about "The Little Mermaid," which told them all about mermaids. And Tabitha also gave Endora a mermaid doll. Yet another clue. And just today, we saw Siren go back into the water after she rescued Miguel. We never saw her lower half. If she were human, we would've seen her lower half. They obviously wanted to hide her fish tail for the time being." Thanks Jamison!!! I agree with you about Siren being the mermaid.

Until next week friends,
Brandi


Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.



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