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The case of the vanishing lady
For the Week of January 20, 2014
Heather left a trail of bloody crumbs to Franco, but will Anna figure out that it's all smoke and mirrors in time to save Carly? Meanwhile, Sabrina decided to lie to Patrick, Lucas returned to town, and Sonny unwisely trusted Morgan. It's time for this week's Two Scoops.
I'm not a detective, but I like to play one from the safety of my comfy sofa. I have years of experience watching crime shows, and I'm addicted to the ID channel -- something that I apparently have in common with Heather. Who knew?


I give props to Heather for framing Franco. She was smart enough to wear gloves when she typed that Dear Franco breakup letter on Carly's laptop and then carefully included things that she had overheard Carly and Sonny discuss at Pozzulo's earlier that evening. After that, she placed one of Carly's suitcases stuffed with Carly's clothes in the trunk of Carly's electric car, and then parked the eco-friendly vehicle in the garage of the hotel where Franco resides.


Next, Heather smeared the car with Carly's blood to make it appear that Franco had attacked Carly and then tossed the supposed murder weapon into a nearby trashcan. Kudos to Mommie Dearest for saving the knife that Franco had stabbed her with. Heather had wiped her own blood off of the lethal weapon, but not Franco's fingerprints, before planting Carly's blood on it. Finally, Heather used Carly's master key card to erase the images that would incriminate Heather and exonerate Franco from the new foolproof, but apparently not Heather-proof, security system that Carly had installed after Connie's murder.


Anna and the hotties of the Port Charles Police Department followed Heather's trail of bloody crumbs straight to Franco just as Heather had planned. Satisfied that the case had been solved, Anna demanded that Scott issue an arrest warrant for his son because she was certain that Franco had murdered Carly.


Except, Carly has only been missing 48 hours, and there isn't any proof that Carly is, in fact, dead instead of merely injured.


Let's start with phone records. We know that Carly's cell phone was with Heather and Carly at the boathouse because Heather took delight in letting Carly know that Bobbie was calling when it rang and Heather saw the caller ID. A simple check of Carly's cell phone records would have pointed Anna and the gang to a cell tower near the Quartermaine mansion.


Next, we have Carly's master key card. A check of Franco's door would have shown the police that Carly's master key had been used to access Franco's room when Franco and Kiki had been out searching for Carly. Franco can't possibly be in two places at once, so if he had stolen Carly's key card as Anna had suggested, then it couldn't have been used to open Franco's door.


The knife is probably the most glaring piece of evidence that should clear Franco, not incriminate him. Yes, his fingerprints are on it, but that also means that Heather couldn't have possibly removed all traces of her blood. Blood is liquid and drips. Therefore, it would have collected between the blade and handle, so not only would Carly's blood be on the knife, but so would Heather's. Remember, no one is reporting that Heather is missing from Miscavige, so that tells me that Heather is still checking in at the institute enough not to raise any alarms.


As an aside, why haven't Franco and Kevin realized that no one has reported Heather missing from the institute? If Franco had truly killed Heather, as he believes, wouldn't he expect at least a phone call from the institute to tell him that his criminally insane mother disappeared?


Back to Carly's case. In the rush to judgment, the police are missing critical evidence that could actually help them find Carly.


Yes, the recovered knife suggests that Franco attacked Carly, but there isn't any evidence that Carly is actually dead. We know that Heather collected the blood that she used to frame Franco from the gash on Carly's arm, which means that Heather couldn't possibly have collected enough blood to suggest that someone was murdered.


There's no blood splatter near or around the car where the crime supposedly took place or pools of blood where they theorized Carly had fallen. There would be if someone had been stabbed to death with a big Ginsu knife like the one that they believe Franco had used.


Additionally, it's only been 48 hours since Carly vanished. Why not put a tail on Franco to see if he leads them to Carly? Isn't it more important to find the victim at this early stage than it is to arrest the person who might be responsible for her disappearance?


I was a bit baffled why Dante had asked Bobbie to drop off Carly's toothbrush so they could collect a sample of Carly's DNA. Given how many times Carly has gone missing, been thought to have been killed, and been involved in various murder mysteries, they should have her DNA on file already.


I'm willing to cut Dante some slack because the guy is dealing with some personal issues that likely prevent him from being at the top of his game. Anna has also been a bit preoccupied since she and Robert decided to whack Faison in Wyndemere's stables. As for Nathan, I'm not the least bit impressed with his investigative prowess, but more on that later.


Right now, the one who annoys me most in this whole mess is Michael. I appreciate that Michael has good reason to despise Franco and to suspect the worst of the man who terrorized Michael's loved ones and put a rapist in Michael's path, but Michael's constant screaming and then threatening to destroy Scott's career if Scott didn't throw Franco in jail grated on my nerves all week. It seems like Michael is more interested in punishing Franco than in actually finding his mother.


Too bad for Heather that her brilliant master plan has one very big glaring problem that will result in everything falling apart for her when she carries out the final step of murdering Carly to provide the police with the body. A simple autopsy will show that Carly was murdered well after Franco was arrested, not before. Carly would have to be dead before Franco is arrested in order to properly frame him for murder.


Despite the holes in this case, I really enjoyed Thursday's scenes of the "murder" from Anna, Dante, and Nathan's point of view juxtaposed with the scenes of what really happened as Heather bragged how she had framed Franco. It was extremely well done.


Sadly, I don't think that Carly is going to be able to count on Uncle Luke to rescue her, even though he found her in the boathouse at the close of Friday's show. It's never that easy. If it were, Carly would have leaned down to remove the gag from her mouth and screamed for help when Monica and A.J. were standing outside of the boathouse the other day.


In other news this week, Sabrina joined the Liar, liar, pants on fire club when she went along with Carlos' plan to let Patrick think that Carlos was the father of Sabrina's baby.


Two words, Sabrina: paternity test.


It's only a secret if you don't tell anyone. This is especially true if you live in Port Charles, where people have a tendency to openly, and quite loudly, discuss secrets in public places when there are lots of big ears around.


I can't believe that Sabrina actually believes that it is better to lie to Patrick and allow everyone to believe that her baby daddy is a mobster on the run rather than simply tell the truth and make the best of the situation. If Patrick and Robin's marriage can't survive the unplanned pregnancy of Patrick's ex-fiancée then that is on Patrick and Robin, not Sabrina, and certainly not the baby. Sabrina is obligated to do what's best for the baby, not for Patrick.


Patrick has every right to know the truth about his child, and I really dislike Sabrina for lying to him and to her own child. If she follows through with the plan then that is exactly what she will be doing. Shame, shame, shame on her.


Personally, I believe that Patrick and Robin's relationship is strong enough to weather this pregnancy. Sure, Robin was worried about the impact that the pregnancy would have on her relationship with Patrick, but I think that's only natural when you find out that another woman is having your husband's child, even under these extenuating circumstances. However, this is the 21st century, not the middle ages. There is absolutely no reason that Patrick and Sabrina couldn't share joint custody of the baby. Divorced couples do it all the time when they remarry and start new families. Is it ideal? No, but it can be done.


It's ridiculous for Sabrina to have this martyr mentality. Then again, the writers have to set Sabrina up to disappear from our screens for a little while when Teresa Castillo goes on maternity leave in a few months. I suspect that they are going to have Sabrina and Carlos leave town together because at this point, Carlos is on the run from both the Corinthos and Jerome organizations, so it's not like he can leave the confines of the apartment except to flee.


Folks, I despise Brad for a host of reasons, but this week I cheered him on when he called Felix out for subliminally wanting to tell Patrick about Sabrina's pregnancy and being a busybody who sticks his nose where it doesn't belong. Brad was on-target and summed up why I get so frustrated with Felix at times. Felix has become the new Amy Vining of General Hospital.


It's time for Felix to get a real life, but not with Brad. Regardless if Brad was right, he's still the guy who sexually harassed Felix, conspired with Britt, and was shown to be a lazy boss who treated his subordinates horribly. Luckily for Felix, a new prospect is on the horizon, so Felix finally has options.


This week heralded the return of Lucas Jones, portrayed by the wonderfully talented Ryan Carnes. I have my fingers crossed that this time around, they make much better use of Lucas than the last time that he graced our television screens.


It looks promising because Friday's show ended with Lucas bumping into his sister, Sam, outside of Kelly's -- although it was a bit strange that he had to identify himself to Sam. I would have thought that she would have at least taken the time to get a picture of her baby brother when the DNA test confirmed that they were siblings.


Then again, Sam has had a lot on her plate lately with Danny battling cancer and now finding out that her new boyfriend has a comatose wife who appears to have been a victim of an attempted murder that the new cop in town is certain was committed by Silas, not Silas' mistress who has strong ties to organized crime.


So far, Nathan doesn't appear to a very good cop because he seems to take evidence at face value. The prescription supposedly written by Silas is a perfect example. How much sense does it make for a doctor to write a prescription for the liquid form of a drug that he intends to kill his wife with, fill it at the hospital he works at, and then go home and inject his wife with the drug that very night? None.


What motive did Silas have for killing his wife? The affair? If I'm not mistaken -- I'm not -- Silas and Ava's affair ended shortly after Nina was found. We know this because Silas wasn't even aware that Ava was pregnant, much less had his child.


Then there was Nina. If Silas had intended to kill her, why would he call for help while she was still clinging to life? He's a doctor. Surely Silas knows the difference between someone who is dead and someone who is not. If your objective is to kill someone, you wait until they are actually dead before you dial 9-1-1.


If I were a cop, I'd be much more interested in Ava than in Silas. Ava was not only in love with Silas and pregnant with his child, but she was also involved with a serial killer named Franco, whom she claimed was the father of her daughter. Additionally, at this point, Nathan knows that Ava not only had a relationship with Franco, but her brother is a mobster. There are more dead people around Ava, Franco, and Julian than a morgue.


There's also the fact that Silas had a brother who was a serial killer who looked exactly like Silas. So much so that both Sam and Rafe freaked out when they first met Silas. Isn't it far more likely that Stephen posed as Silas to obtain the prescription and then went to kill Nina? Not to Nathan, which begs the question as to why Nathan is so focused on Silas?


I suspect that we are going to find out that Nathan is Nina's brother and that he's blinded by his parents' hatred for Silas and certainty that Silas tried to murder their daughter.


It's a good thing that Silas has Sam in his corner because she's determined to clear her Boo's name by proving that Aunty Ava was the one who had wielded the toxic syringe.


Of all of the relationships currently playing out on our screens, Sam and Silas' relationship is the least dysfunctional. They were built up slowly, which allowed what appears to be a genuine friendship to grow between them. I think this allowed Sam to get past her shock of finding out he had a secret comatose wife. Sure there was a pot meets kettle moment when Sam was furious that he hadn't told her about Nina, even though there had been a time when Sam had neglected to tell everyone about her slew of husbands that she had bilked fortunes out of. However, Sam quickly got over her anger and then got down to saving Silas' butt.


I also loved when Silas actually showed some backbone this week by reminding Sam that it was entirely possible that Franco could be innocent of abducting Carly. I want Silas to be a challenge to Sam, not an easy catch. I think Sam needs that right now.


Meanwhile, could Silas' open mind towards Franco be the beginning of a beautiful bromance? I hope so because those have been few and far between lately. Other than Duke and Mac, there are no real strong male friendships on the show right now.


The award for Idiot of the Week goes to Sonny for so readily trusting that Morgan is suddenly Team Corinthos.


This week, Sonny didn't hesitate to throw Duke under the bus by immediately spilling the beans to Morgan that Duke is secretly working for Sonny to take down Julian. But wait, there's more. Sonny also warned Morgan to keep it zipped because Anna doesn't have a clue, so there will be hell to pay if she should get wind of it.


The look on Duke's face was priceless. I practically heard the "Whaaat theee fffuuuu...dge" -- only he didn't say fudge -- thought blast through Duke's mind in that sexy Scottish brogue of his as he looked at Sonny. Even Morgan did a double take on that one.


Later, Sonny made love to Olivia and then hatched an absurd scheme to evict Julian from the hotel. I can't wait for Carly to get back and remind Olivia that two people own that hotel and that Sonny will always back Carly over Olivia. If Carly wanted Julian out, he would have been gone. Clearly, Carly has her reasons for keeping the enemy close.


I really couldn't take those scenes seriously. Olivia playing tough mob moll as she informed Julian that she had terminated his lease because of a preposterous clause about the burden of proof being on the tenant when it comes to criminal activity was just silly.


Crimson was run by Connie Falconeri, Sonny's fiancée, before Julian swooped in as Derek Wells (his legal name at the time, thanks to the WSB) and bought it up, lease and all. Are we really to believe that Julian's attorneys didn't catch that?


I really hope that Julian does follow through on his threat to take Olivia to court and then laughs in her face when he moves back in. It would serve her right just as it had served Sonny right when Ava told Sonny that she didn't recall him bringing Connie's killer to justice when he made that vow to make people pay if Carly was harmed. I hate when Sonny acts like an ass, and this week he was hee-hawing particularly loudly.


The moment that put a big ole happy grin on my face and made my heart skip a beat was when Nikolas and Elizabeth bumped into each other at the hospital.


Thank you, Ron, for that nice nod to Becky when Liz invited Nikolas to go ice-skating. It made this fan smile because even though Liz hasn't been on lately, it told me that Ron is definitely a fan of the actress, which is always a good thing. For those readers who might not know, as a teenager, Becky was a competitive figure skater who skated with the likes of two-time Olympic medalist Michelle Kwan.


Liz and Nikolas' back-and-forth banter was wonderful. They have chemistry and history, and they look pretty hot together. A trifecta in my book.


I know that there are those who prefer Nikolas with Britt, but I'm not one of them. Britt is a hot mess and probably better suited for someone like Julian rather than Nikolas. Britt simply sucks at being good because it's not in her nature. When given a choice between a lie and the truth, Britt always lies.


Britt's gene pool guarantees that she will always have a very strong dark side, much stronger than Nikolas, who at least has the blood of Laura and Leslie flowing through his veins. Poor Britt has Obrecht and Faison's coursing through hers.


I hope that Nikolas and Liz's scene this week was a hint that once the truth about Ben is revealed, Liz will be the one to help Nikolas pick up the pieces of his shattered romance with the Britch. Nikolas and Liz's affair didn't work last time because of the circumstances, but things are different now. Liz is getting over a bad relationship with A.J. -- who better stay far, far away from Liz's children and cars -- and Nikolas will soon be getting over a bad relationship with his nephew's kidnapper.


The stars will be aligned for Nikolas and Liz, so I hope the writers take advantage of that.


Lastly, this week, the show addressed the chief of staff position at the hospital by revealing that Robin had put her name in the running.


Wasn't Robin once an interim chief of staff who had made everyone at the hospital miserable, including herself? I couldn't understand why she would apply for the position just a short month after returning to her life, especially since I'm fairly certain that she's not even employed at the hospital. I can't imagine that they left a dead woman on the payroll for two years. If so, perhaps they do need a new chief of staff.


Previews for Monday show that Britt is also one of the candidates, which absolutely shocked me. How can a doctor who admittedly tried to sabotage a nurse's career, who altered the results of a paternity test, and who deceived a couple about their baby qualify for chief of staff? At the very least, Britt's medical license should be under review.


A few things that tickled my fancy

Brad accuses Felix of trying to monitor everyone's life
Felix: "Just because I'm a concerned friend doesn't mean I'm monitoring anything."
Brad: "Concerned friend? No, no, no. Felix, you are a pathological buttinsky. You couldn't mind your own business to save your life."


Lucy claims she had a nightmare about Richard Simmons
Lucy: "I can still hear the boom, boom, boom, booming of the boom box -- that awful retro tune."
Kevin: "I'm sorry. You know, part of my job is to interpret dreams, but, uh, Richard Simmons? I got nothing."


Felicia tries to assure Lucy that Lucy's erotic dream about Scott was harmless
Felicia: "Lucy, a dream is just that. It's not real. I have dreams about Frisco now and then."
Lucy: "You do?"
Felicia: "Well, they're mostly nightmares."


Elizabeth accuses Nikolas of slowly turning into his uncle, Stefan
Elizabeth: "I'm sorry, Nikolas, but it is happening. All the spontaneity is just being sucked right out of you, and before you know it, you're gonna be wearing all dark suits, and every word you utter is gonna be at least three syllables."
Nikolas: "Is it -- is it that bad?"


Heather tells Carly about the master plan and what Heather wants the police to believe
Heather: "The cops will think you're a victim of the new wave of breakup violence. I've been hearing so much about it on that 24-hour real-life crime channel. It really is an issue, you know."


Julian reveals to Ava that Lucas is his son
Ava: "So, you have yet another child from yet another one-nighter, and you're just finding out about him now? You certainly did spread your seed, didn't you?"
Julian: [chuckles]
Ava: "Was this Bobbie an underage teenager, as well?"


Tracy learns that there might be a raccoon in the boathouse
Tracy: "Have things gotten so bad around here, I'm reduced to living with vermin?"
A.J.: "Why? Is Luke moving back in?"


Until next time, dear readers, take care.
Liz Masters

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