Readers I need a notepad to keep track of the crime spree affecting Port Charles and its citizens both locally and around the globe.
To recap -- The remaining Lopez Brothers are out for revenge on Johnny after Sonny framed him for murder. Sam, who was spying on them, is now secretly trapped in the back of their van en route to another crime. Both the Russian mob and serial killer Franco have evil plans for Brenda. Johnny planned to kill Sonny in broad daylight, but Sonny was quicker on the draw and shot Johnny in self-defense.
Crooked cop Ronnie hid Johnny's gun to make it look like Sonny shot an unarmed man point-blank, right after he framed Jason for torching Johnny's warehouse. Lisa was breaking and entering, stealing Robin's HIV meds, defacing wedding photos, and has now possibly added kidnapping baby Emma to her rap sheet. Brook Lynn used the date rape drug on Dante to get her $50,000 payoff from Carly.
Even resident good guys Lucky and Dante lied for Michael so his parole wouldn't be revoked.
They should change the name of General Hospital to CSI: Port Charles.
It's too much crime for me and not enough Love in the Afternoon. Watching the old footage of Sonny and Brenda reminded me about the Best of GH. I miss that sense of adventure and romance. Sure, there was still crime on the show back then, but it was more (as the clips showed) Sonny and Brenda running from bad guys chasing them and less Sonny shooting people in the chest point-blank. I said "people" plural because let's not forget he also shot Dante point-blank in the chest when he felt threatened a few months ago.
I don't even know where to begin, but I think I'll start with Lisa. I have been whining about this for weeks and I'm going to whine about it again. Dear Male Writers at GH…Women are not so unstable that they go from being a reasonable prominent surgeon to a crazed stalker because of a one night fling with you.
This whole storyline makes me shudder. Certainly we've known all along that Lisa still had a crush on her old college boyfriend, Patrick. Totally believable scenario. We saw her talk trash about Robin, try to remind Patrick of the fun wild party hound he was in college, and flirt with him mercilessly. All perfectly acceptable to what could actually happen. But then after she spends one night with Patrick, to have her become psychotically obsessed with him to the point of stealing his baby is not a plot I can buy into.
And it's not because I'm such a loyal Robin fan either. In fact, I've found Robin to be quite annoying as a character ever since Stone died, (see Soap Central for news on Stone's upcoming return!) so I don't care all that much if her marriage breaks up. Okay wait, I liked her with Jason until she told AJ about Michael, too. I just wanted to go on record and say I'm not upset about the Lisa storyline on Robin's behalf -- I'm upset about the Lisa storyline on Women's Behalf.
And then there's Brook Lynn, another smudge on the name of women everywhere. So, Brooke Lynn, who is a Quartermaine and could get unlimited loot from Great Grandpa Edward just for going to college, would instead drug her childhood friend for a quick fifty grand from Carly?
They say, "If you can be bought, you'll be made an offer." And Brook Lynn could be bought. How much would someone offer you before you'd agree to drug and seduce a dear family friend? Personally, I don't need money that bad. And I don't hate college or listening to my Grandpa that much that I'd pick Carly's offer over Edward's.
Adrienne Leon is doing a fine job playing a vixen. She seems to have chemistry with almost everyone. This is a much more interesting role than when she played boring Colleen on Y&R. I see the potential for a zesty Brook Lynn storyline -- I kind of like the idea of a Johnny/Olivia/Brooke triangle, but she's going to hook up with someone else first, which should be fun, too.
One thing I can say I loved about the the drugging storyline: the delicious Lulu/Brook catfight complete with slapping!
But Brook Lynn's innocent act won't work forever. Eventually it will come out that she was indeed the person who drugged Dante. I wonder how it will impact Michael's relationship with his mother when he finds out Carly put the whole thing in motion. It would be fitting if Michael cut Carly off altogether and grew even closer to Dante. Jason implored Carly to drop it, but she's a dog with a bone and refuses to release her grip. She'd rather risk Michael's freedom than let Dante get off unscathed.
Michael will be the one who finally gets the truth out of Brook Lynn about her evil deeds, which carries on the theme that the smartest and wisest characters on GH both have brain damage.
Elizabeth might have brain damage, too, as she agreed to move into Wyndemere with Nikolas, and we all know bad things happen to people who live at Wyndemere. In fact, I thought way back when Emily got murdered there, Nikolas was going to sell the joint. I guess everyone forgot. Maybe at Halloween time, Rebecca will come back and fake haunt him.
On a happy note this week, we did get a little romance in the Ethan and Maya arena. I like the two of them together, but I fear Ethan getting sucked into the mob full force with Johnny down for the count and worry that relationship will just become another mob-centric shoot out. I also wish they'd stop hinting about Maya's past and tell us the whole gory story.
And last week I was whiny about Brenda and Sonny still being apart, but this week I found myself enjoying the tension between them in spite of myself. The scene where they both dialed one another and didn't get connected was touching. That's a scene we've all played out, I suppose. I'd suppose most adults have a person that we'd pick up the phone to call and dial all but one digit and then hang up because we know it is better left alone. The writers did a good job of capturing that dynamic.
It's kind of hilarious that Kristina wants to do a report for school on Brenda, but I fear Robin will be a little too busy with the fallout of her kidnapped baby and cheating husband to provide an introduction to Brenda for Kristina.
Poor Jason wasn't even out of Pentonville for 24 full hours before creepy Ronnie trumped up charges and had Jason back in jail. I still think Ronnie has some connection to Franco and shares his bizarre obsession with Jason. I wish the Lopez brothers would accidentally run Ronnie over in their crime van.
What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Brenda tell Suzanne about the time she wore the wire and Sonny left her crawling on the floor? Will the powers that be realize the kid they hired to replace Aaron Refvem grew too much over the summer and now looks the same age as Michael, and hire real Morgan back? Will Dante and Lulu eat some more Lante cupcakes prior to make-up sex? Will Luke come home from his summer vacation with a weird new haircut? Will my head ever stop throbbing after I got klunked there with a parking gate today? Will Nikolas give Sheba extra oats to make up for having so many extra kids riding her?