If you are a child of the 70's which I am, a tune will play in your head when you read that title. If you are not, go and Google "Fly Robin Fly" and watch it on You Tube. Mind you' it's not that great of a song, I just want you to get the annoying repetitive tune stuck in your head. Why should I suffer alone? Confession: I started to write "Die, Robin Die" instead, but decided that was too cruel, even for me.
I hate Robin now. I really do. I loved her on GH when she was a child. I loved the Robin who sat by Stone's bedside as he died of AIDS. I adored the Robin who took up with Jason after his accident and helped him find his soul again. I loved the Robin who was a good friend and gave honest and wise advice and whose smile lit up a room. (If you haven't seen that incarnation of Robin, go to YouTube and watch some old clips of Robin and Stone.)
Sadly, we haven't seen that Robin for over a year now. We saw the Robin who left her beautiful baby Emma under the coat rack in Kelly's diner for an hour. And when she finally realized she left her baby behind, she bolted out of the hospital which had just put her in charge of managing a bus load of 26 seriously injured kids. She didn't go back to the hospital after she found Emma or even call. I have to wonder if all those kids still lying in the hospital driveway bleeding. The fact that she found her baby was an "only in a Soap" moment. In real life, her baby would have either been long gone, (Jahi Turner anyone?) or turned over to the police. Can you believe that all of Kelly's patrons were so oblivious they didn't see an abandoned baby while they were drinking their coffee? Or that Mike never came back out into the diner from the time he talked to Robin to the time she returned?
We never see Nice Robin anymore. We see Shrew Robin every single day and I just despise what they have done to her character. It isn't just the PPD storyline either - she already became nasty and unlikable back when she was lying to Patrick about being her baby's Daddy. They have made her completely unwatchable. I have considered sending all the e-mail I get about Robin to ABC. Most of it says some variation of this sentence "When I see Robin, I fast forward." And that's a shame. Kimberly McCullough is worth more than that and deserves better material to work with.
If this is the Robin we have left, I would really rather they killed her off. Patrick could be a single Dad until some enchanted evening when he and Elizabeth accidentally bumped into one another at Parents without Partners. Liz and Patrick could fall in love and Jake, Cam, and Emma could be a big happy family. "The end." I daydream a lot, can you tell? But they won't kill her off; they will just keep torturing us with her. At the end of Friday's episode it appeared like she was running away - she headed for the open highway instead of into town to have dinner with her seriously handsome husband. I say good riddance. Fly Robin, Fly!
Now on to what I liked… My single favorite moment of the GH week was Maxie saying the 3 magic words that Spinelli has dreamed of hearing, "I Love You" I can't decide if she just realized it herself, or if she knew but didn't tell him? Anyway, it is out there in the air now. Maxie spoke life and hope and magic into the air with those three words. Damian Spinelli now knows for certain that the woman of his dreams actually loves him. All of his devotion, sincerity, sacrifice and patience have paid off. He got what he hoped for. Now what? What will he DO with the love he has been offered? Anything? Nothing? Follow Jason's advice and run off to a foreign country without Maxie? They are the most unlikely couple in Daytime and yet my favorite.
He is a computer nerd who speaks his own geekalicious language and she is a fashionista with a selfish streak. But at their core, they are perfect together. Maxie appreciates Spinelli in the most basic of ways - she knows she is tragically flawed, and he knows it, too but loves her anyway. Maxie has confided her darkest deeds to Spinelli, and he looks at her and sees what is good and right about her. How could she NOT love him? I'm just so happy she finally said it, because he has been waiting to hear it for a very long time.
Will her love give him the confidence to stay and fight? Can Spinelli become Superman and fight the feds with the power of love to bolster him up? Maybe, but more likely we will see Winnifred stepping up to get Spinelli out of trouble. Good thing Agent Raynor just upped her security clearance, right? What must happen for Spinelli and Jason to get out from under the thumb of the Feds is for all the evidence about Spinelli to vanish. Now Winnifred is in the position to make that happen.
I hate that Spinelli will be in debt to Agent Leeds. If he falls for Winnie and dumps Maxie my heart will implode. Winnifred got credit with the FBI for the big art robbery bust, but seriously, does anyone believe that little 80 pound girl took down 3 giant criminals and recovered a painting she couldn't even lift? She was flashing her badge around and looked like a little girl in a CSI Halloween Costume. If we are supposed to take her seriously, she needs an Extreme Makeover. Ditch the pigtails, speak English, put on some makeup, and watch a few episodes of Annie Wersching on 24 as Agent Renee Walker.
Spoiler Alert - If you hate spoilers, skip to the next two paragraphs.
Claudia's jig is up. Two Port Charles guys will find out about her dirty little secret. How each of them chooses to handle that secret is anyone's guess. Both Ric and Jax will get their hands on the incriminating evidence against Claudia regarding Michael's shooting. I predict Ric will use it to blackmail his former lover into doing God knows what for him. Ric never passes up a chance to get leverage on someone.
Jax is another problem altogether. He and Carly are finally healing and on a good path to a happy marriage. I am rooting for them. But my guess is that Jax will sit on the information, and later on Carly will loathe him for not telling her. Why would he sit on it? To protect Morgan, of course. If Sonny found out that Claudia and Johnny were involved in Michael's shooting, another mob war would break out and Morgan and Carly would be in danger. Also, if Jax saw the DVD, he will realize Jerry is still alive and wreaking havoc, and his undying loyalty to his hoodlum brother will color his choices as well. This is an interesting development in the storyline, way to go writers!
I will apologize in advance to all you Kate Howard fans, but I hope she takes an extended trip back to Manhattan. No one is buying Crimson in the depth of the recession so she should go back to the city to fundraise and schmooze advertisers or something. Kate used to be an interesting character, and now all she does is sneak in and out of Sonny's house and make threats to Claudia. Zzzzzz. But, at least she does it with great hair and in designer clothes, right? Rumors are circulating that they have dropped the Dante/Olivia storyline to focus on aging Michael, Morgan and Kristina. Since a Michael recast has already been confirmed, it's probably true. (Dylan Cash got robbed.)
If that's the case, there is no more storyline for Olivia or Kate and they should go back and reclaim their roots in the city. Olivia's only role lately is walking around the lobby of the Metro Court with a clipboard. What a terrible waste of her talent. Of course, my gossip might be wrong and Dante will show up Monday. I guess time will tell. But even if they stay, I don't see a happy reunion for Sonny and Kate. When Sonny discovers that Kate knew he had a son and didn't tell him, and knew who was responsible for Michael's shooting and didn't tell him, game over. You might not have noticed, but he's not a very forgiving man.
Mixed reviews on Teethan. Some of you love him, some of you hate him. I'm kind of on the fence at this point and willing to give him a little more time to win me over. The fact that Ethan and Lucky got into a fistfight makes me think my hunch is right and he could be Luke's son with Holly. But we also saw Ethan with a photo of Luke AND Robert, so it could go either way. They had him interact with Robin too, so maybe he's Robin's little brother? With the chemistry between Lulu and Ethan, it would be tragic if they were siblings. At least if Robert is Ethan's daddy, Lulu is free to hook up with him.
Here is how I foresee this playing out. Maxie spots Spinelli spontaneously kissing Winnifred after she deletes all the evidence against him. Maxie runs to Johnny for comfort and they end up making out again. Lulu sees them kissing and runs to Ethan for revenge sex. Either I have a really twisted mind, or I have been watching too many soaps for too many years. Or maybe both.
On a side note, I love it when Luke calls Lucky "Cowboy." It reminds me of precious little Jonathan Jackson when he first appeared on the show. I wonder if he ever regrets leaving GH? Lucky might actually get Lucky with Rebecca this week. I fear that will not ingratiate him much to his brother Nikolas. I also feel cheated because the writers had us thinking Liz and Lucky were going to reunite and then pulled the rug out from under us. Like many of you, I lived Jason and Liz together, but I lost patience with the relationship when they were apart more than together. If the extent of their relationship was going to be stolen glances when they passed by one another at Kelly's, well that just wasn't enough for me.
I had high hopes for awhile, because I thought after Jason gave up Anthony to the Feds they would offer him a job as a secret agent. That would allow he and Liz to be together because Jason would have legitimate back up to keep his family safe instead of the useless Max and Milo who leave their guard posts to talk to Diane about which brand of soup to buy. But as usual on GH, the law enforcement agents are the bad guys, dirty-dealing, double- crossing scum, while the mobsters are the heroes. Port Charles is like Bizarro Superman.
So, we got bamboozled. Liz and Lucky's reunion has been scrapped to make way for a love triangle between Lucky, Nikolas and Rebecca. Jason and Liz have no chance because Agent Raynor is a Liar Lips Fibber Face. So, as I mentioned at the outset, if Robin dies or runs away, Liz can have Patrick. Or maybe Matt and Patrick can fight over her. Soaps love a good triangle.
Another thing that tickled me was Claudia's party idea for the Five Families. Does anyone else remember the Five Families getting mowed down in a blaze of gunfire a few years ago? Who will attend Claudia's party? Their grandkids? I think Faith Roscoe killed most of them, and others have died in random mob violence throughout the years. I think they should change their name to the Five Leftovers.
What will happen tomorrow dear readers? Will Robin leave her baby in a tree, or under a coat rack, or in the tiger cage at the zoo? Will Rebecca keep touching Lucky's stitches with her greasy diner hands until they get all infected? Will Tracy ever go one week with the same hairstyle? Will Sam give Winnifred a Pink Lady makeover and show her how to look tough? Will the residents of Port Charles consider car-pooling the next time five of them have to drive separate cars from Port Charles to Michael's hospital that's two hours away? Will Spinelli say it back, or faint?